Friday, February 06, 2009

PREAKNESS FANS BANNED FROM BRINGING IN ALCOHOL!





What in the holy hell is this all about?....

Say goodbye to the fraternity party atmosphere at the Preakness. Organizers are banning you from bringing your own alcohol or water onto Pimlico's infield.

Pimlico's top brass say they are trying to give the Preakness a new dimension this year. Maryland Jockey Club President Tom Chuckas says they are hoping the changes will give the Preakness Celebrations a different feel and introduce a new audience to horse racing.

But Preakness fan Matt Plummer says it could chase recurring fans away. "They expect to drink, bring their own beer and party all day."

Chuckas says beer will still be available in 16-ounce cups. But you'll have to buy it for $3.50 a cup. Water and other beverages will also be sold.

Preakness fan Mike Bauwens says, "That's going to change everything. It's expensive already."

In addition to the alcohol changes, Pimlico will add an infield concert and professional volleyball tournament to the infield party. This year's performers will include ZZ Top & Buckcherry.

The price of tickets won't change. It will still cost you $50 in advance or $60 at the door. This year's Preakness is scheduled for May 16th.


As a 4-time drunk attendee of the Preakness Stakes I have to admit this is a sad, pathetic day. The whole point of going to Preakness is bringing in your own beer and not worrying about dishing out a shitload of cash for booze. Hell, we would bring in bottles of cheap Tequila in Sprite 2 liters and make Tequila sunrises at 7 am inside the infield. Why did we do it? Because it was all we could afford as college students. Getting the tickets was a lot of money for us. This is a fucking disgrace that is all holy about Preakness. I also can't believe the tickets are that expensive. When I went a decade ago the tickets were $35 advance, $40 at the door. And the economy was fucking great back then. Now you are going to tell all these college kids they can't bring their own booze, will get charged $3.50 a beer, and the tickets are a rip off? They just royally fucked themselves on this and I can guarantee that the crowd will be cut at least into half. What a joke!

So they want a higher clientele in there is what I'm taking from all this. Fuck them and their horserace is what I say. Those uppity douchebags drinking their Mimosas and Mint Julips! This calls for a riot. No more running of the urinal races anymore...


I'm so pissed right now. I'm going to go buy a couple of 30 packs of Natty Light and drink like I did then and pass out in my front yard with piss all over myself. Why? Because it's in honor of my college years at Towson and Preakness. You didn't just drink and see random fights and fake breasts on that infield in Pimlico. You grew up if you made it out alive. You entered a boy and left a man. A really, really drunk man. What is the world coming to?




I'm going to miss the random, just flat out crazy shit that happens at Preakness...

HOW DO YOU KNOW SOMEONE'S BUTT SMELLS?

I will be the first to admit that I can release some powerful odors at ease and I bless my wife for putting up with it but I have never, ever had this happen to me...



MOM BUSTS SUPER BOWL PANTS PARTY

This is what happens when you celebrate a Steelers victory by giving your teenage girlfriend a Steely McBeam before her mom gets home from a Super Bowl party...

A woman reported Sunday night she found her daughter, 17, and a Russell man, 18, naked together in bed.

The woman returned from a Super Bowl party at 11:49 p.m. when she found the pair. She requested officers escort the man from her home. The daughter reported she and the man were at a different party where they were drinking beer. The girl said she knew he was not allowed in her house, but she invited him anyway.

The girl is facing a juvenile charge of underage consumption. The man, who had a small amount of marijuana and a marijuana pipe, was charged with underage consumption, marijuana possession and drug paraphernalia possession.


Major, and I mean major party foul by the mother here. Not only did you get your daughter in trouble with the law but you managed to embarrass the shit out of her just because you were jealous of her getting some Steely McBeam from some young hunk. She should be the one in jail for bad parenting. Hell, if this was in California and not Cleveland she would have been joining in with her daughter on same late night sexcapades.

THE CURIOUS CASE OF MATT BUSH


Some kids are born with all the talent in the world yet have a ten cent head. Matt Bush would be one of those kids. Bush was taken #1 overall in the 2004 MLB draft by his hometown San Diego Padres becoming the first high school shortstop to be taken in the top spot since Alex Rodriguez in 1993. The similarities between the two end right there.

His selection was controversial from the start as more highly regarded college players such as Stephen Drew and Jered Weaver were passed on by the Padres because of signing bonus issues. In other words Scott Boras represented both. The Padres took Bush who was a local kid out of Mission Bay High School and gave him their biggest signing bonus to date at $3.15 million. The 18 year old Bush had a ton of money in his pocket to burn and little sense of the talent he had. Less than two weeks after the draft he was involved in a fight at a nightclub in Peoria, AZ, just outside of the Padres Spring Training facility. He was accused of felony assault, disorderly conduct, misdemeanor trespassing, and alcohol consumption by a minor. In other words just a typical weekend for myself in college.

He went on to hit only .199 in 99 at-bats at Rookie level ball while adjusting to the switch from aluminum to wooden bats. The Padres expected big things out of him in 2005, his second season in minor league ball. Unfortunately he continued to struggle this time at A Ball in Ft. Worth. His .221 average over 453 at bats was clearly not living up the hype of his #1 overall draft pick status. He was invited to Spring Training in 2006 but broke his ankle and missed half the season. Now that I think about it that was right around the time I broke my ankle. Holy shit, Matt Bush wants to be a Fairchild clone. We both suck at baseball but somehow he has a lot of money. Ok, we aren't too similar.

Anyways after he broke his ankle he came back and put up a putrid .583 OPS in 2007 before the Padres decided to switch him to pitcher. Bush has a cannon for an arm and could routinely hit mid 90's on the radar gun. He was also a star pitcher for his high school team so it looked like it might work out on the mound as he fanned 16 batters in just over 7 innings of work in the Arizona League. He lasted only 7 innings when he started feeling pain in his elbow. He had a torn ligament in his right elbow and underwent Tommy John surgery which required him to miss the rest of the 2007 season and all of 2008.

So you would think with all these lumps Bush since he was drafted first overall in 2004 he might eventually wake up and realize what he has and not throw it all away. Nope. The Padres designated Bush for assignment to make room for Cliff Floyd on the 40 man roster yesterday. Essentially they released him and it wasn't because of his elbow. Bush is in trouble with the law again...

El Cajon police Lt. Steve Shakowski yesterday confirmed an investigation involving Bush and allegations of assaultive behavior and public intoxication. A witness, who requested his name not be used because of the ongoing police investigation, said Bush was drunk, threw a golf club into the dirt, picked up and threw a freshman lacrosse player and hit another one. Bush also yelled “I'm Matt (expletive) Bush,” and “(expletive) East County,” before driving over a curb in his Mercedes when leaving the campus, according to the witness.


So where this leaves Bush is up to him. He has become San Diego's baseball version of Ryan Leaf. An immature idiot who couldn't harness his talent or his destiny. Someone will pick him up no doubt because the talent is there. He doesn't have near the talent of a Josh Hamilton, another reclamation project, but if his velocity returns after rehab he could at the very least become a good bullpen arm at the Major League level. He is still only 23 years old and once you have Tommy John surgery the arm usually becomes more stronger with intensive rehab than it was before the injury. If he can manage to control his alcohol and rage issues then this curious Bush case could someday become a great comeback story as Hamilton proved after beating his demons.

RICHARD ZEDNIK HAS ELEVATION BRO


You may remember the name of Richard Zednik from nearly a year ago when he took an accidental teammates skate right to his external carotid artery. God was on his side then as well as Florida Panthers trainer Dave Zenobi quickly aided Zednik as he skated off the ice in stopping the bleeding by putting pressure on the wound. Zednik healed quickly and now apparently has been given the ability to elevate over opponents such as Brendan Witt for this impressive goal in a win over the Islanders last night. Godspeed Zednik!

Video HT: WithLeather