SportsCrack Blog

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

WTF HAPPENED TO SNOOP DOGG?

What you just watched above is Snoop's new video for Sensual Seduction. I'm not sure what I think about it other than I miss the old Snoop. I miss the sexual deviant who would poor out his juice on his ho's heads and shit. This Sensual Seduction song is the shit you hear on the dance floor when all the girls decide to pick their drunk mate for the night. I guess the song is good for most guys in a way because it will get girls all ready to bone but I think it sounds cheesy. Plus I hate those stupid ass clubs like FEVER here in Atlanta that all the douchebags go to and spike up their frosted hair while dancing with their girls/whores/strippers who are really just out looking for more blow. This is where this song is destined to be played for the next 2 years. I don't want to hear it at my local watering hole while I cry into my dark Guinness and wonder why I smell and look like an old tent with urine stains. Anyways, be ready to be bombarded with this song every hour for the next 6 months if you listen to the radio.


COLLEGE FOOTBALL TOP 10
Just one more regular season weekend in this bat shit crazy, makes no effing sense college football season. Of course last week we had the top 2 teams go down faster than Britney Spears on a McDonald's french fry so you know this week should be another week of upsets. This week's top 10 is brought to you by Big Funbags who bring you beer.

1. Missouri Tigers-Chase Daniel made Kansas his bitch last week in Arrowhead Stadium. He told her what he was going to do and then did it without any hesitation. I still can't believe I have Mizzou, fucking Mizzou, as the #1 team in the country. More than likely it will be short lived after they lose to Oklahoma in the Big 12 Championship.

2. West Virginia Mountaineers-People are already starting to pile on West Virginia saying they have benefited from an easy schedule and shouldn't get the chance to play for the NC. I'm not one of them. I think the backfield quartet of Pat White, Steve Slaton, Owen Schmitt, and Noel Devine would run all over teams like LSU and USC. They are now in the dreaded #2 spot which has been hell on all other occupants. They have Pitt this week. If Dave Wanny wasn't their coach I would pick Pitt in an upset. West Virginia will destroy Pitt in Morgantown.

3. Ohio State Buckeyes-Played a bullshit schedule and almost went undefeated. If they manage to squeeze into the BCS Title game they could be embarrassed again.

4. Georgia Bulldogs-The hottest team in college football right now, the Dawgs destroyed the Yellow Jackets last week but still are not playing in the SEC Championship this week thanks to the Volunteers win over Kentucky. A Rose Bowl match up with USC would be great TV.

5. LSU Tigers-Les Miles needs to shut his fucking mouth and stop campaigning for his team's right to go to the BCS Title game. You lost two games to a 5 loss team and a 4 loss team. Shut your damn pie hole and just take the Michigan job already.

6. Kansas Jayhawks-The Fighting Mangino's gave it their all against Mizzou but just came short on the scoreboard. Nothing to hang your head about, Kansas fans should be ecstatic they are going to a BCS game. I tip my hat to their unbelievable season so far.

7. Oklahoma Sooners-They get a chance to beat Mizzou twice in one season while also playing for a Big 12 Championship and a right to a BCS game. It should be plenty of motivation along with a healthy Sam Bradford to ruin Mizzou's season.

8. USC Trojans-Dude, you lost to fucking Stanford and still have a shot at winning the PAC-10 with a win over the horrendous UCLA Bruins. Just another reason to punch any dipshit who tries to make an argument that the PAC-10 is in the same league as the SEC.

9. Virginia Tech-They are having their typical Frank Beamer season racking up 9-10 wins against inferior competition. Congrats on that, now go beat Boston College in the ACC Championship.

10. Hawaii Warriors-I was wrong about this team last week. They are the best Non-BCS conference team in the land. If they beat Washington this week they have earned a right to play in a BCS bowl game only because I would rather watch them play then some boring ass ACC team.

Just missed the cut: Florida Gators, Illinois Fighting Illini, Arizona State SunDevils, Boston College Eagles