Friday, April 18, 2008

MIGUEL TEJADA CAUGHT LYING


Honestly I don't know how I feel about the video. One part of me hates ESPN for being the dick they are and entrapping Miguel Tejada with proof they already knew he would lie about. This was never breaking journalistic news because everybody with a functional brain knows the Dominicans lie about their age. I wonder why they didn't have Peter Gammons(Red Sox cocksucker) or Buster Olney(an actual great baseball mind unlike Gammons in my view) ask the tought questions to Tejada? Why? Because ESPN is full of vaginas. But in this instance they look more like the dick and the asshole more than the pussy. Because we all know there is three things in life Chuck: dicks, assholes, and pussys. And clearly ESPN is all of them. If they want to be fair and balanced with this garbage they should talk to more Latinos like David Ortiz, Manny Ramirez, Bobby Abreu, Robinson Cano, and other Red Sox and Yankees players about their age before they pull this shit with Tejada. But they won't because 90% of ESPN is full of those bandwagon cockbags.

I almost feel bad for Tejada before I realize he is caught in the lie. Similar to NBC's To Catch a Predator minus the actual breaking the law and being moralistically wrong, Tejada lied about his age. Big fucking deal. Women lie about their age all the time. All this interview does is make ESPN look like some sort of TMZ minus the integrity.

Yes, TMZ minus the integrity is what ESPN is these days. Sad isn't it? It's the reason why ESPN leads off with Yankees-Red Sox news and how Matt Ryan is the greatest QB to come out in the NFL draft since Peyton Manning. National sports coverage deserves more than the recycled regionalized bullshit that is ESPN. We want real coverage, coast to coast. We know Tejada lied about his age and we really don't care. We want to hear about how the Arizona Diamondback's Justin Upton might be the best 20 year old to play in the major leagues since God know who and not about some BS story about a fucking jersey being cemented under a rival's new stadium.

We don't give a rat's ass about the New York Knicks more than we do the Atlanta Hawks so why make news about the Knicks firing Isiah Thomas? Nobody gives a shit about the Knicks outside of New Yorkers themselves more than they care about the Hawks still sucking balls and making the playoffs out of the Big East conference known as the Eastern Conference of the NBA. Let's talk about how amazing the Kansas City Royals young pitching staff is becoming or how good the National League West is going to be this year and for one minute not talk about something on the East Coast.

As those marketing geniuses did at Nike I want you to Just do it ESPN. Give us serious discussion on the rivalry between the Cubs and Cardinals and the Dodgers and Giants. They are as relative to baseball as those other two teams you love to cover in baseball. I want good journalism and not TMZ. I want Tejada to hit homeruns and lie about his age because they really don't matter. I want ESPN to be honest about Matt Ryan and see him nothing more than the next Ken Dorsey or David Greene.

And for God's sake I want more Erin Andrews and less of Holly Rowe.

BEST BASEBALL NICKNAMES


Sports and Rants has their list of the top nicknames in baseball today and I think The Hammerin Hebrew has to be the best one by far. Ryan Braun is a great young slugger who can't field worth a lick and if there is one name that can make Milwaukee people cream in their oversized pants besides Milwaukee's Best it has to be Hammerin Hebrew.

BETWEEN TWO FERNS WITH ZACH GALIFIANAKIS

I love bananas.