BETWEEN TWO FERNS

Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis by Between Two Ferns

File that under WHO GIVES A SHIT.

PRO BOWL SNUBS

I will be the first to admit that I could usually care less who makes the Pro Bowl. It's a glorified vacation in Hawaii with worn out NFL players sipping down Singapore Slings and Mai Tais while staring down other things then their wives(call it the Antonio Pierce syndrome) and less about going out and playing tackle football. But this year I have watched a ton of NFL football mainly because the Atlanta Falcons and Baltimore Ravens are both battling for playoffs spots with rookie quarterbacks and rookie head coaches and so I have invested something in the 2008 season.

How these players didn't make the Pro Bowl is a joke and signals how much of the selection is just on past reputation:

JOHN ABRAHAM (Atlanta Falcons)-Abraham has been a beast all season playing on a Falcon's defense which is underrated. Abraham leads all NFL defensive ends in sacks with 15 1/2 yet he got shafted in favor of an underperforming Julius Peppers. We all know Jared Allen of the Minnesota Vikings and Justin Tuck of the New York Giants should be there but picking Peppers over Abraham is an injustice. He has 3 more sacks and has come up huge in big play situations for the Falcons unlike Peppers.

STEVE SLATON (Houston Texans)-Let me be the first to admit, like my prediction on Matt Ryan, that I was completely wrong about Slaton's impact in the NFL. I honestly didn't think he would have one. But Slaton has proved me wrong by rushing for 1,124 yards and 12 TD's while also catching 40 balls. He deserved to get the nod over Ronnie Brown of the Miami Dolphins. Brown has rushed for 300 LESS yards, 2 TD's LESS, and caught 16 LESS balls while averaging LESS yards per carry than Slaton. That is a lot of LESS and therefore Slaton won't be able to enjoy the leis of Hawaii when he should be.

PHILIP RIVERS (San Diego Chargers)-He has 28 TD passes to lead the AFC and has an impressive QB rating of 101.4. Yet Brett Favre makes the Pro Bowl over him despite leading the NFL in interceptions and his 21 TD's and 86.4 QB rating are not even close to comparable to Rivers. What a fucking joke! Favre might be one of the most overrated players in NFL history. Just ask Peter King after he gets off his knees and removes Favre's member from his mouth.

Those are my three biggest snubs. There are others like Ryan Clady of the Broncos who you could make an argument should be there but I felt there was no argument against Abraham, Slaton, or Rivers getting the selection.