SportsCrack Blog

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

OSI UMENYIORA LIKES TO POOP ON GIRLS

DOLPHINS HIRE TONY SOPRANO


Okay, it's not really the Jersey tough guy but you have to admit Tony Sparano is going to turn a lot of heads with that name down in Miami. The new head coach of the Dolphins should know that the Miami/Boca Raton area is a loaded cesspool with retired Mafia syndicates. They might come after him just because they get him mixed up with Bobby's cousin's girlfriend's uncle who went by the same name who once stole a shipment of plasmas being delivered in Cherry Hill a few years back. I'm just saying. But seriously Sparano needs to shave that fucking mustache. The Hitler/pedophile look is so 1970's buddy. If there was a Hall of Fame for jerk off mustaches Sparano would be the president of the fraternity with Dave Wannstedt as his VP. And we all know how Wanny fared in Miami with that hairy follicle lip. I'm just saying.