Tuesday, May 22, 2012
It's pretty simple. You feed them, clean their shit, play with them, and put them to bed. What you don't do is put them in a dryer. Pretty sure that's the first step in the Good Parenting book: DO NOT PUT BABY IN ELECTRIC DRYER.
The kid is safe. But the fact that these type of people can procreate scares the living piss out of me. Not only do you put your kid in the dryer and give him a few potentially deadly alligator rolls but then you freak out and run to get help. Dude how about you unplug the fucking thing?
Posted by Matt Fairchild (firstname.lastname@example.org) at 8:08 AM
I've gone on record saying I've never caught a foul ball let alone a home run and I've probably attended well over 300 ball games in my lifetime and yet this lucky SOB catches back-to-back home run balls in Cincinnati. Unbelievable! I guess the key for me to finally catching one is to go to the next Braves game Mike Minor is pitching and sit in left center. Obviously it doesn't even matter if the opposing pitcher is hitting my chances of catching a home run ball are exponentially greater with Minor throwing BP, I mean pitches. By the way I never understood the throwing back of the home run ball if it's the visiting team who hits one. Fuck that! There is absolutely no way I would ever throw it back just like there is absolutely no way I would have Minor start another game over Kris Medlen if I were Fredi Gonzalez.
Posted by Matt Fairchild (email@example.com) at 7:46 AM
As a Braves fan the one team that scares the living shit out of me in the NL East is the Miami Marlins. Yes the Phillies are the champions but they are getting old and have too many injuries. The Nationals are playing great but they are still too young. And the Mets are still just the Mets. The Marlins on the other hand have a good mixture of veterans (Jose Reyes, Hanley Ramirez, Mark Buehrle, Omar Infante, Carlos Zambrano, etc.) and some young guys like 22-year-old Giancarlo Stanton who can absolutely murder the ball. And you know Ozzie will keep things interesting down there in Little Havana. Before the season started I thought the NL East would be a Phillies/Marlins battle. Today, May 22, I think it will come down to the Braves and Marlins. Both organizations have good scouting departments and have sluggers (Stanton and Freddie Freeman) who are on their way to being huge superstars this season. It will be fun to watch.
Posted by Matt Fairchild (firstname.lastname@example.org) at 7:39 AM