SportsCrack Blog

Thursday, August 09, 2007

TOM BRADY'S EX-GIRLFRIEND ABOUT TO POP?

Holy sperm! Look at the size of the belly Bridget Moynahan is showcasing these days. I went out of town a few weeks ago thinking she delivered the baby right around Tom's current girlfriends birthday (Giselle Bundchen).

Well, I was wrong. That baby is staying in as long as possible but for what reason? The kid is going to have the easy street as soon as it pops out, what is the reasoning? Unless it knows it's all a sham and it's not really Tom Brady's but some other low life player like....PacMan Jones.

Now that would be entertaining.

THE OFFICIAL "VICK CHEW TOY"
I guess it was only a matter of time till this thing came out...

but I'm actually thinking about buying one as a collector's item.
I wonder if Arthur Blank is the genius behind this item, after all he did coddle him for all those years and now feels he needs to get some vengeance for his mistrust.

Anyways, you can buy the cracked out (look at those eyes) chew toy of Michael Vick so your best friend can chew him a new one at this link.

Apparently some of the proceeds go to fight animal abuse. Sounds like a win-win situation for dogs and dog lovers.

21 DAYS TO GO!
Till LSU and Mississippi State kick off the college football season. Could we have an upset the first game? Not likely, but stranger things have happened.

Enjoy this clip Tiger fan's. Kentucky, well, hmmm, I would recommend sticking with what you know: basketball and Ashley Judd's nipples.

HEY KIDS! I WILL HAUNT YOU IN YOUR DREAMS AND IN YOUR FANTASIES!
Apparently the Pittsburgh Steelers took a page out of Stephen King's "It" and decided to make something that would completely scare the shit out of little kids. Not only that but they gave it a porn name in Steely McBeam. So not only will kids shrivel up and cry the next time they go see a Steeler's game but they will also have traumatic experiences when they get older and start watching porn.

Pittsburgh fans will live in horror for years to come, whether it involves watching football or porn. I can see a young child crying while trying to watch Hines Ward run a slant pattern and decides he wants no more.

And we all know kids who turn off football are either gay or just want to watch a little porn. But now kids all over the greater Pittsburgh area will be whimpering whether making a tackle or tugging the one-eyed purple headed monster.

It's just not right. Where has America gone wrong?



Hey kids, want some candy while we watch football and porn?

ANY GUESSES TO WHO WILL BE STARTING FOR ND?








I'm thinking as of right now Demetrius Jones gets the nod because of his ability to escape the pocket and break off some big runs against Jon Tenuta's aggressive blitzing defenses.

But I want to know what you think.