Good Knowing You Penn State Football

-$60 million dollar fine.

-4 year bowl/postseason ban.

-Significant scholarship reductions of 10 per year for a four-year period.

-All wins from 1998 to 2011 vacated. Sorry JoePa. You just went from 1st to 7th in head coaching victories.

-All current Penn State football players are eligible to transfer without having to sit out a year.

Basically the Penn State football program is dead. No 5 star recruit is going to want to go to Happy Valley when they know they can't play in the postseason or compete for a conference title. It was good...well...not really...knowing you Penn State football. You protected and knowingly covered up for a serial child rapist on your own campus. This penalty by the NCAA was deserved and justified.

Introducing the Irish Mob T-Shirt...also available in Cool Dri

Taking pre orders now on this exclusive #IrishMob t-shirt. You can still get our soft 100% cotton t-shirt in this style for the low price of $17 but we are also making our first Cool Dri performance t-shirt available for the Irish Mob. It's a light weight 4 oz. 100% polyester performance shirt that compares to the best Under Armour shirts out there but at a fraction of the price. Basically it's great for the summer to work out in or wear to a tailgate or a party without having it cling to you like a normal cotton shirt.

Kudos go out to Jerry Kennedy for sending in the idea. He's a huge #IrishMob fan and we felt obligated to make the best looking design for DameFan. Be sure to check out his blog.

Order your limited edition #IrishMob t-shirt today. Shipping starts July 23rd.

Pedobear Posing Next To Joe Paterno Statue

Via Deadspin comes the inevitable Pedobear posing right next to the most famous statue ever to be made in honor of a man in Joe Paterno who covered and abetted for a child rapist for over a decade. Now that is some school pride. We Are Penn State!

Jeremy Lin's "Somebody That I Used To Know" Parody Song

What the fuck were the Knicks thinking? They just let their most marketable player since...well...ever...just leave for $6 million dollars extra that the Houston Rockets were willing to pay. Fucking stupid if you ask me. Now maybe Jeremy Lin is a flash in the pan but at least he keeps people talking about your team and sells tickets, gets television viewership, and sells merchandise. He's like Tim Tebow without the virginity cloud glooming over his head.

If you don't like Gotye's "Somebody That I Used To Know" song then you probably hate this parody. I actually like the song even though it's been played 25.6 billion times in the last 24 hours on the radio. Thus I love this parody song. Well done my friends. Now let's figure out a way to get Lin back on the Knicks so I don't have to ship all these leftover Linsanity shirts to all the poor college grads out there. You thought I was going to say Haiti weren't you?

Video via ThePostGame

SEC Media Days Bingo 2012

I got a lot of money riding on "We're Excited" and "Nick Saban Destroys Reporter." Don't let me down now SEC coaches.

Via SBNation

It's Not American but here is a Great Canadian Football Play

Yes we are literally counting down the seconds till football starts but since we still got another 5 weeks till the real thing I give you this highlight from America's Hat: Canada. You don't see many 129 yard missed field goal returns for touchdowns around these parts but that is exactly what Tristan Jackson did last week for the Saskatchewan Roughriders.

Via HotClicks

Delonte West Throws Like A Basketball Player

Does Delonte West still play? Just wondering out loud because if he isn't still banging Lebron's mom while getting the ball in the hoop on the court then he definitely has a promising career as a Major League outfielder. Look at that gun! Bryce Harper and Mike Trout have nothing on Delonte in terms of arm strength.

Via TheBigLead

Jimmy Fallon: At The Bar With Roger Federer

I forgot to mention Roger Federer winning his record tying 7th Wimbledon the other day because...well...he's so fucking boring. Federer is the greatest men's tennis player but like Pete Sampras before him he's got the personality of a dolt. It's probably the main reason why tennis viewership and interest in the United States has steadily declined the last two decades. More people were excited and heartbroken to see runner up Andy Murray cry like a spoiled 5 year old who got his favorite stuffed animal taken away then see Federer hold another Wimbledon Trophy. Tennis could be so much more exciting if all the rich white people in attendance just got drunk like they do at baseball and football games.

Must See Video: Shark Takes Away The Catch of The Day

I can listen to these rednecks scream all day. "OH SHIT...JESUS CHRIST...IT'S A SHARK....IT'S A SHARK!!!....IT'S A BIG ASS SHARK!!!!"

Then the guy acts like his girl can just reel in the shark. Priceless.

This Chipper Jones 2012 All Star Game Speech Brought Tears To My Eyes

After watching Chipper Jones give this inspiring speech to his fellow NL All-Star teammates I have to wonder how there is not already a bronze statue in the clubhouse. This speech will go down with the Tebow speech at Florida and the "Win one For The Gipper" speech from some unknown football coach at a tiny Jewish school in lower Michigan. I literally had tears flowing while listening to Chipper mumbling to his teammates who pretended to care that this was his final All-Star game. This speech just makes me one go out and.... take a nap.

By the way this is one of the reasons why baseball coaches are overrated at the MLB level. You can't give inspiring speeches to ballplayers. It just doesn't work. Sure I can see it working in football or basketball where a player can take over a game but in baseball it's rare unless it's the pitcher. And even they could care less about it being your last game. You think Matt Cain threw better last night because of Chipper's speech?

Patriots Owner Bob Kraft Is Banging This Actress Named Ricki Noel Lander, Has an Audition Tape

Good for Bob Kraft. Instead of wallowing in self pity over the death of his beloved wife, Myra, last July after a battle with cancer he is out banging a 32-year-old "actress" named Ricki Noel Lander.

Kraft is 71 so it's not weird at all for Ricki to be dating a guy who is old enough to be her grandfather. The rumor is this audition tape is for a new Vince Vaughn film called "Internship" which is actually be filmed here in Atlanta.

You gotta love Kraft's acting chops. He had me totally convinced the whole time he was some lonely old man at a strip club trying to pick up a trick. It's almost like he went undercover to study the role.

Video via Barstool Sports

Jose Canseco's Old Milwaukee Commercial

So Old Milwaukee still tastes like shit and does steroids? Fantastic. Can't wait to try it again.

David Letterman's Top Ten Fun Facts About The All-Star Game

I honestly can't remember the last time I watched David Letterman. Probably late 90's if not earlier. Which makes me wonder if any of these MLB All-Stars actually know who David Letterman is. Jared Weaver looked lost, high, or whatever with that "happening mullet."

Via ExtraMustard

This Lightning Strike in Arlington Looked Fun

Yeah not scary at all. Now excuse me while I go wipe the piss off my leg.

Trout For MVP Anaheim Baseball T-Shirt

Here is the newest SportsCrack.com t-shirt called TROUT FOR MVP. If you saw his amazing catch in Baltimore you know that this Trout can jump and fly with the best of them. We are taking preorders now. Shipping starts July 9th on these limited edition Trout For MVP t-shirts. As always a portion of all sales goes to the American Cancer Society.

Isaiah Crowell Arrested on Gun Charges

Georgia tailback and leading rusher Isaiah "Shotgun" Crowell was arrested this morning and charged with multiple felonies including carrying a concealed weapon. Don't worry folks Mark Richt will give him a come to Jesus talk.

According to Athens-Clarke police spokesperson Hilda Sorrow, Crowell was arrested as the result of as “vehicle check-point stop” — a road block — on East Campus Road at Green Street at 2:20 a.m. Friday. Officer Kristin Thornton reported smelling the odor of marijuana in Crowell’s 2005 Mercury Grand Marquis. Crowell gave consent to search the vehicle, himself and four other unnamed occupants. No marijuana was discovered but a 9-mm Luger handgun with an altered serial number was found under the driver’s seat. Crowell was immediately arrested and taken to jail and the car was impounded.

My guess is Crowell will never play another down between the hedges. It seems like every offseason I'm making excuses for one of their tailbacks getting suspended or thrown out of school. Actually it is every offseason. Crowell is just the latest "can't miss" prospect who just couldn't grow up and mature in Athens. It's probably Mike Bobo's fault.

Don't worry Georgia fans. You still have freshman Keith Marshall. He won't get in trouble because he is actually a good kid off the field. His skill set is similar to Crowell but he doesn't have quite the size. Marshall is the fastest guy on the team though so he will be fun to watch.

Special Report: ESPN's Andy Katz Reports Jared Sullinger Has Bulging Dicks

Yes that would be a concern for any NBA team. You can't just take a guy like Ohio State forward Jared Sullinger if he suffers from a bad case of bulging dicks.

SportsCrack 2012 Preseason All-American Team: Defense

Defense wins championships right? It's hard to argue with it last year when two of the best defenses in the nation in Alabama and LSU squared off for the BCS Championship. Of course we will conveniently ignore the year before when Auburn and Oregon both had average defenses yet competed for the crystal ball. Just the thought of all these guys playing on the same defense made Matt Barkley shit his pants.

DEFENSIVE END-Sam Montgomery (LSU)
LSU produces stellar defensive lineman like Nickelback produces complete shit. One after another. Montgomery is a returning 1st team All-American who was a finalist for the Defensive End of the Year Award. His 9 sacks last year were a team high. Expect double digits in 2012.

DEFENSIVE TACKLE-John Jenkins (Georgia)
At 6'3 351 pounds Jenkins is basically two men carved into one hell of a beast. Jenkins will plug the middle for a potentially great UGA defense this season. Don't be surprised if he has a Nick Fairley impact his senior season.

DEFENSIVE TACKLE-Star Lotulelei (Utah)
A potential #1 overall draft pick Star is the most complete Utah football player since...well...ever. The 6'4 320 defensive end is constantly double and even tripled team but still made a hell of an impact last year in the PAC-12 earning 1st team honors. Brings back memories of Ndamukong.

DEFENSIVE END-William Gholston (Michigan State)
It kills me to say this about a Sparty player but Gholston is probably the most underrated defensive player in the country. Gholston is still growing and at 6'7 275 pounds it's hard for any tackle to stop him in his tracks. Gholston has tremendous upside and I think he will put it all together this season after a spectacular bowl game vs Georgia (5 tackles for loss).

OUTSIDE LINEBACKER-Jarvis Jones (Georgia)
You know USC is crying in their dirty Trojans letting this stud linebacker transfer to the east coast. Jones was a finalist for the Butkus Award last year while earning 1st team All-American honors after recording a staggering 19.5 tackles for loss and 13.5 sacks. He should once again dominate between the hedges in 2012.

INSIDE LINEBACKER-Manti Te'o (Notre Dame)
Manti came to South Bend as the most highly regarded defensive player in the past 20 years and has yet to disappoint. Manti once again led the Irish in tackles while earning 1st team All-American honors. He shocked many including myself when he decided to come back for his senior season. Manti is already a legend at Notre Dame but 2012 will give him the chance to be considered the greatest linebacker in their storied history.

INSIDE LINEBACKER-Shayne Skov (Stanford)
When I think of inside linebackers I tend to think of guys who are always there making a play on defense. The Ray Lewis-type players. Skov is that type of guy. The fast and tenacious Skov is coming back from a serious knee injury he suffered early last season. He should once again be the leader in a very underrated Stanford D.

OUTSIDE LINEBACKER-Gerald Hodges (Penn State)
"Linebacker U" just continues to produce standouts and it doesn't change with Hodges. Unlike the past great Nittany Lions Hodges doesn't have to worry about dropping the soap in the showers anymore. Also he doesn't have to worry about JoePa eating his brains. Or does he? In all seriousness Hodges is a great player and should be fun to watch his senior season in Happy Valley.

CORNERBACK-David Amerson (NC State)
The returning 1st team All-American led the nation in INTS with 13 last season. He was the winner of the Jack Tatum Award for nation's best defensive back and probably should have won the Thorpe Award over Mo Claiborne. At 6'3 194 he's a little bigger than most corners but he doesn't lack in speed or recovery time.

FREE SAFETY-Eric Reid (LSU)
One of the hardest hitting safeties in the nation who also is the team leader down in Baton Rouge. Reid earned All-American honors during a stellar sophomore season last year and should once again be a player offenses gameplan around. This kid has the brains and the brawn to be one of the best safeties in the college game since Ed Reed.

STRONG SAFETY-Ray Ray Armstrong (Miami)
For one reason or another Armstrong has been able to put it all together and stay on the field down in Coral Gables. That changes this year. Physically gifted with closing speed and instincts Ray Ray should have a great senior season.

CORNERBACK-Xavier Rhodes (FSU)
Rhodes will be the first to tell you he didn't have the best 2011 season due to some leg injuries. It's one of the main reasons why he chose to come back and not enter the NFL draft. The nagging pain should be gone and I fully expect Rhodes to be back to his stellar self.


SPECIAL TEAMS

PUNTER-Brady Wing (LSU)
KICKER-Caleb Sturgis (Florida)
KICK RETURNER-De'Anthony Thomas (Oregon)
The Black Mamba don't fuck around. He takes it to the house.

PUNT RETURNER-Tyrann Mathieu (LSU)
The Honey Badger don't give a shit. He takes what he wants.

Mike Trout Makes An Amazing Catch in Baltimore

Even though 20-year old Angels outfielder Mike Trout wasn't recalled from the minors until April 28th he still leads the American League with a .344 batting average and 21 stolen bases. Everybody is talking about Bryce Harper and for good reason but why is the national media "clown"ing Trout and not giving him the props he deserves?

Last year Trout was the #1 rated prospect in baseball. He also was a first round draft pick but unlike Harper he went late in the first. There are at least 20 teams kicking themselves in the ass for passing up the high flying Trout.

Trout is another old school player much like Harper. He hustles. All the time. He's also fearless when it comes to defense. And by judging from last night's amazing rob of a JJ Hardy home run Trout's stock will continue to swim upstream with the leather.

So if you had just one player to start a MLB franchise with who are you taking: Trout or Harper?

Typical New York Yankees Cheating At Baseball

Let me guess. Rudy Giuliani gave DeWayne Wise the key to the city for another classic cheating moment. The Yankees always reward behavior like this. Right after this play one of the Steinbrenners kids gave umpire John Hannahan a lifetime suite for botching such an easy call. Hey dipshit why don't you actually look in Wise glove to see if... get this...the actual ball is in there? I know it's totally ridiculous to question a guy in the pinstripes in New York but you might want to do your job correctly.

SportsCrack 2012 Preseason All-American Team: Offense

Every single offseason we do a preseason college football All-American team and every year it continues to gets bigger. In fact I think more football players would rather make the SportsCrack list than the Playboy list. The SportsCrack list doesn't guarantee you a visit to the Playboy mansion but it does insure you will be a star for years to come. Plus you can't get VD from our selection. As least not from me.


QB-Matt Barkley (USC)
Barkley surprised everybody including myself when he decided to come back for his senior season. A projected top 10 pick, Barkley will be looking to do what Andrew Luck couldn't do last season: win a Heisman and/or National Championship.


RB-Marcus Lattimore (South Carolina)
Lattimore was the best running back in the SEC the past two seasons in my opinion before suffering a serious knee injury. If Lattimore played for Bama he would already have a statue next to Saban. Instead he plays in Columbia where he should be happy to make a bowl game.


RB-Montee Ball (Wisconsin)
"Money Ball" as they call him in Madison returns for his senior season after rushing for nearly 2000 yards and an astonishing 39 touchdowns combined. You know Wisconsin is going to run their horse again this season.


WR-Sammy Watkins (Clemson)
Watkins was clearly the best freshman in the nation last year. He is the most explosive player in the ACC since CJ Spiller was toting the rock for the orange and purple a few years back. Watkins will put up better numbers this year. His drive and determination will make him the best wideout in the nation.


WR-Robert Woods (USC)
Nearly 1300 yards and 15 touchdowns for the returning Biletnikoff Finalist. He will have the best QB in the nation throwing him balls with a #2 receiver in Marqise Lee who would be a #1 at 99% of the other schools not named the Trojans. Woods will be electric again this season.


TE-Tyler Eifert (Notre Dame)
Eifert should have won the Mackey Award last season for best tight end in the country. He will get his chance during his senior season to lay his big mitts on it playing in an offense that will feature him again splitting out to wideout. At 6'6 expect this gazelle to put up video game numbers especially with Everett Golson throwing to him.

CENTER-Barrett Jones (Alabama)
Jones was an All-American tackle last year for the National Champs and also played guard for the 2009 Champs. This year he will play center and again will dominate the SEC. Besides QB Jones is the most valuable player on the Tide roster.

OFFENSIVE GUARD-Omoregie Uzzi (Georgia Tech)
Uzzi helps open up holes on the inside for Paul Johnson's triple option down in the Flats. And by opening up holes I mean he trucks over lineman and lays on top of them. Yeah Uzzi loves pancakes.

OFFENSIVE GUARD-Jonathan Cooper (North Carolina)
The 6'3 325 pound senior has good feet and even quicker hands. You gotta have those quick hands when you are taking classes that don't really exist right?

OFFENSIVE TACKLE-DJ Fluker (Alabama)
Alabama's offensive line is pretty disgusting with the best center in Jones and now the best left tackle in Fluker. They also got one of the best guards in Chance Warmack. There is a good reason why Bama wins so many games in the trenches. Fluker is one of them.

OFFENSIVE TACKLE-Chris Faulk (LSU)
While Fluker is the best offensive tackle in college football right now I think Faulk could turn himself into the best one by midseason. The 6'6 325 pound tackle isn't even as heralded as his teammate in opposite end tackle Alex Hurst but Faulk will be a man among boys this season. By the end of the season he will have worked his way up to a top 5 pick.

Kate Upton Running on the Beach, Skateboarding, Hula Hooping, Shooting Hoops, Riding Rollercoasters, and Wet T-shirt Contest Video

I'm just going to do a slow, slow golf clap for this new GQ video featuring Kate Upton. When you are at the top of your game like Upton is you just have to sit back and admire it. Upton knows she is the Jordan of models. The Montana of winning t-shirt contests. She is the Tiger Woods of confidence that she can use her "talents" to get her whatever she wants. Bravo Kate Upton. Bravo.

I think Kate Upton could run for office. She clearly knows how to give people what they want. What is that you ask?





Via BigLeadSports

Finally College Football Will Have A Playoff

The best news to hit the college football landscape in some time is somehow being ignored by the mass media but I wanted to give my thoughts on it. Yesterday the BCS Commissioners and Notre Dame AD Jack Swarbrick (shows you how much money ND brings to the table) formally endorsed a four-team playoff seeded model designed to begin in the 2014 season. The four-team playoff would replace the much debated BCS System which has been in place since 1998.

Thank you college football corporate Gods!

Am I completely satisfied with the new proposal? No.

I would prefer to see at least 8 teams involved in the playoff. With over 120 teams I think 8 is fair. 4 seems to leave too much up to debate at the end of the year in my opinion. But it's a step in the right direction.

There will still be controversy because you will have teams who don't win their conference in the playoff (the playoff only considers the top 4 teams in the nation at the end of the season according to ranking system) but it also keeps the regular season to the utmost importance besides filling the pockets of all the old rich guys in charge of the bowls, conferences, and schools. The four teams would be selected by a committee which is suppose to consider criteria such as conference championship and strength of schedule but it's not exclusive to it.

Come to think of it the more I look at it the more pissed off I get but I shouldn't. I should just be happy that college football will finally have a playoff of some sort. But still the whole thing seems shady with the existing BCS bowls rotating games of importance and the all important National Championship game would go to the city with the highest bidder.

Basically whomever has the most money will dictate the playoff in some way. College football has always had a political feel to it so obviously that won't change. But instead of focusing on the student-athletes and the fans who all want a real playoff system in place that is not dictated by lining the pockets of the notoriously corrupt bowl system we are being given a plus one system.

But then again it's better than the shitty BCS right? Fuck. Me.

Bryce Harper Wears Our "That's A Clown Question, Bro!" T-shirt During Batting Practice

Thanks to Washington Nationals announcer F.P. Santangelo a first in SportsCrack.com history happened yesterday: an athlete wore one of our shirts during batting practice.

Bryce Harper coined the phrase "That's A Clown Question, Bro" just 7 days ago in Toronto when asked by a reporter what his beer of choice would be and yesterday he was spotted wearing our shirt during warmups.

Wednesday, Harper took the next step, wearing a T-shirt with "That's a clown question, bro" emblazoned across the front before the game against the Tampa Bay Rays, according to the Washington Post.

Thanks go out to the Washington Post's James Wagner and Dan Steinberg for giving us the heads up on Harper wearing our shirt during BP. We also want to thank Santangelo for personally delivering it to Bryce in the clubhouse who said he "loved the shirt" and now all of his teammates want one. Also HUGE thanks go out to our buddy and Natitude fanatic Adam McGinnis whom endured my pestering for a good Bryce shirt idea for weeks and delivered amazingly with the instant classic "That's A Clown Question, Bro" before it all went viral last week. Also thank you to Tommy Griffith's of Big 100.3 in DC who had us on air last week to talk about the shirt. Tommy is a good guy and you should definitely give him a listen if you like classic rock. And of course thank you to all the loyal customers and SportsCrack fanatics out there. You guys kick ass. Seriously.

Tomorrow I will be on ESPN 980 AM in DC with host Scott Jackson around 3:45 pm talking about the "That's A Clown Question Bro!" shirt. Give it a listen if you got the time in between not working like usual.

I'm still working on getting a solid picture of Bryce wearing the shirt. As soon as I receive it I will post it.

Bryce Harper's Walk Up Song is Justin Bieber's Boyfriend

That's a clown song, bro! Either Bryce Harper has a wicked sense of humor or he lost a bet and had to suffer through a Bieber ballad blasting in Nationals Park. I'm going to go with a lost bet. I think the veterans should mess with Harper and play The Doors "Alabama Song" with a clown dancing on the jumbotron. Video via DCSportsBlog

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid Used "That's A Clown Question, Bro!"

Via DCSportsBlog comes Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid using the infamous Bryce Harper quote "That's A Clown Question, Bro" less than seven days after it went viral. He's got our vote!

Kate Upton GQ Magazine Wet T-Shirt Video

I'm still waiting for the VH1 Special...Kate Upton...Behind the boobs. Anyways I've been massively busy lately with work that I haven't had time to come on here and bitch and moan about sports and for that I apologize. When I get the chance at some free time I promise I'll update it. In the meantime all you lazy fuckers go find a job so I don't have to keep paying your welfare and unemployment checks.

Love you.

Oh yeah does that skinny fucker Terry Richardson have the best job or what? He's uglier than myself which is hard to imagine yet he nails all these models and famous actresses all the time. It's so disgusting that it's actually kind of awesome.

What do you think about these GQ photos of Kate Upton Billy Bob?

Happy Father's Day

It's the Dad's Life!

That's A Clown Question Bro Remix

The Dream Team Documentary Was Worth Watching

11 Hall of Famers on one team. And then Christian Laettner. You tend to forget how great of a team "The Dream Team" was because they made it look so easy and simple when they won the 1992 Gold Medal. It's almost hard to believe it's been 20 years. Charles Barkley was skinny and still running his mouth with memorable quotes. Magic had just broken the news he had HIV. Jordan was unstoppable. Chris Mullin had his patented flat top. John Stockton had his short shorts. If you get the chance watch the whole documentary.

I love the fact that everybody hated Isiah Thomas. Nobody wanted him on the team. I could never stand Thomas when he played. He seemed like the biggest pussy out there. A bad sport through and through. Jordan and Scottie Pippen put their foot down and Thomas wasn't allowed on the team. It's the way it should have been and it made The Dream Team even more likable because Thomas was a nightmare when it comes to representing the U..S...of A.

THAT'S A CLOWN QUESTION, BRO! T-SHIRT NOW AVAILABLE

Bryce Harper said it last night. Now it's a t-shirt. Buy your shirt today! THAT'S A CLOWN QUESTION BRO! SHIRT

Mike Tyson Performs "Lebron James"

Iron Mike Tyson has the voice of an angel.

Via HotClicks

Bryce Harper Says "That's A Clown Question Bro!" To Canadian Reporter

Rookie of the year lock Bryce Harper was asked point blank in Toronto last night by a clueless reporter what his favorite beer was and Harper fired back a classic line: "THAT'S A CLOWN QUESTION BRO!"

Now that is some serious "Natitude" from the 19-year old Mormon who isn't allowed to drink. And you know what...I like it. Seriously baseball needs more guys like this. Harper hustles all the time and doesn't take shit from anybody. He's a pain in the ass for the opposition and he's the kind of player every manager or GM would want on their team. People wonder what kind of crazy numbers Josh Hamilton would have put up if he didn't chase the dragon coming out of high school and all you have to do is look at what Harper is doing right now. He's killing major league pitching at an age where he should be struggling with Double A pitching.

Harper's .944 OPS dwarfs Ken Griffey Jr's .748 when he was 19 and taking over the majors. Same with Hall of Famers Mickey Mantles (.792) and Al Kaline (.652) who both enjoyed similar success in the majors at 19. The only player I could find who put up the incredible stat lines of what Harper is projected at right now is Mel Ott (.921). Back in 1928 Ott was in his 3rd season in the bigs at the time and still the future all-time great didn't put up as good of numbers as Bryce is now.

So now a serious question: Is Bryce Harper MVP worthy? His .944 OPS has him behind current favorites Joey Votto (1.121), David Wright (1.03), Carlos Gonzalez (1.001), and Carlos Beltran (.964) but would Harper's impact on getting the Nationals to the playoffs trump all of those guys? Hard to say. Voters tend to reward veterans who get their respective team to the playoffs so you would have to think Votto and Beltran both have to be the favorites over Harper at this stage. But make no mistake if Harper continues to hustle and bash his Nationals into the playoffs for the first time a lot of voters would have to look at the 19-year-old as a serious candidate.

It would be a total clown move not to consider it.

You Knew It Was True Love When Kanye West Twitted This Kim Kardashian Picture

The former Mrs. Kris Humphries looks like she has a healthy appetite for bananas. They do provide a lot of potassium which is essential for a healthy and balanced diet. It's good to see that Kim Kardashian and Kanye West can be such great ambassadors for healthy living.

Justin Tuck's New Facemask

Justin Tuck's newest facemask looks like something Tom Hardy's character Bane will wear in the new Batman movie. I'm presuming there is some logical reason behind the extra bars other than trying to look menacing. Is to keep offensive tackles hands and/or fingers from grabbing his helmet by the mask? Or is Tuck trying to lure Bruce Wayne out of his batcave?

LA Kings Captain Dustin Brown Said A Naughty Word After Winning the Stanley Cup

In the immortal words of LA Kings captain Dustin Brown: "IT'S WHY WE FUCKING PLAY!" Yep. To drink out of Lord Stanley's Cup you can pretty much say whatever you want. Congratulations go out to the Kings who won their first Stanley Cup in their 44 year history. It must feel good to be champs. Hell it must feel good to still have a team.

Via AwfulAnnouncing

Erin Andrews Looks Like She Got Some Work Done

Bravo Erin Andrews. You go from Atlanta Thrashers intermission reporter to ESPN sideline princess to leaked nude hotel pictures to Dancing with the Stars and now you've upgraded the girls. Hey I'm not complaining. If someone ones to make themselves look better than so be it. But I don't want hear a denial when some reporter asks if she has gotten work done. Just be honest. It's all for the publicity right? I got your back Erin.

The Bell Dozer Shirt

The newest SportsCrack.com t-shirt is called "The BellDozer." With college football season just around the corner this is a must have. Order your shirt today!

Rafael Nadal Wins Record 7th French Open, Disturbingly Hugs Pau Gasol

I don't think I've ever seen a more disturbing picture than this one of Lakers center and fellow countryman Paul Gasol "embracing" Rafa Nadal after winning his 7th French Open Title this morning. With the zombies in Miami and Maryland and the guy chopping up dudes and sending them in the mail up in Canada I think it's only a matter of time before a report comes out on Gasol here. Look at that fucking look on his face. Hannibal Lecter is ripe with jealousy.

"Come here my precious...you did good...now I must eat your brains!"

Yeah this picture is going to haunt kid's dreams for years to come. Tennis already was a dying sport. I can't imagine the effect this will have on it.

Image via Andy Gray

Celtics Fan Throws Beer At Lebron James

Lebron James exploded for 45 points, 15 rebounds, and 5 assists in Game 6 last night and pretty much put the Heat on his back in an elimination game. Lebron hit 19 of 26 from the field and finally played fearless when in the past he has been passive in big game situations. As expected the Boston Celtics crowd took it with class and in their usual chowder head mentality decided to give Lebron a beer as he left the court. Unfortunately the person didn't hand him the beer and instead decided to toss it to him. Cool move bro.

I was rooting for the Celtics till that dick move. Now I hope the Heat destroy them in South Beach.

The Tri-City Herald Paper Salutes The Sonics

Congratulations go out to the Seattle Sonics Oklahoma City Thunder on their impressive comeback last night vs the Spurs and finishing off Coach Pop's timeless warriors for the Western Conference Championship. The Tri-City Herald (Kennewick, WA) put out this knife to the gut sports section today. Bravo I say. Why not put a little humor in a bad situation? It's why I always laugh and point at the dead people at funerals.

Maria Menounos Is A Little Pumped Up For Game 6 Tonight

Jesus Maria. Calm the fuck down. It's just a basketball game. It's not like it's some important competition followed worldwide like Dancing With The Stars. Nobody outside of Boston gives a shit about the Celtics. Now get back to doing what you do best. Which is...shit...I don't know...just put on a bikini and smile will ya?

Via BarstoolSports

Kate Upton Bikini Stare Contest

Don't worry about the contest. We all won.

HT Dave

Notre Dame Picks Up Elite Defensive Players Isaac Rochell and Jaylon Smith

Less than 5 days after Notre Dame and coach Brian Kelly secured their biggest commitment with the #1 outside linebacker in the nation (#4 overall) in Jaylon Smith today 4 star defensive end Isaac Rochell from Georgia made his commitment to the Irish public also.

Both players are elite defensive standouts who were being recruited nationally with among some of the best SEC schools craving their commitments. Kelly and his staff are slowly building a defense that can compete with some of the SEC schools by getting players like Rochell out of the South.

Here are some highlights of Smith. Smith is the biggest recruit of the Kelly era (transfer Aaron Lynch and current QB Gunner Kiel a close second) and should compete right away as a freshman in 2013 for the dog or the mike linebacker positions in South Bend especially with the departure of senior captain Manti Te'o. Smith's athleticism is off the charts with sub 4.5 speed and a build that is ready to compete in the college game.


Rochell is the second elite defensive end from Georgia to come to Notre Dame in the past 3 seasons joining current freshman starter Stephon Tuitt. Tuitt was a 5 star defensive end and Rochell isn't quite up to his billing but he did turn down LSU, FSU and Florida among others when he picked Notre Dame today. A top 100 player in the nation and the #8 defensive end Rochell should compete for the 2 deep in 2013.

Julio Jones Cuts The Dreads

I'm not going to miss the Whoopi Goldberg/Predator-look Julio Jones had rocking since his college days at Bama. Julio looks more professional now. Kind of like Justin Blackmon behind a steering wheel at 3 am professional ya know?

Padres Logan Forsythe With The Play of the Day

San Diego Padres second baseman Logan Forsythe brought back memories of Robby Alomar with this sweet play to the hole. Smooth play kid.

Miami Dolphins Cheerleaders Lip Synching "Call Me Maybe"

Yeah I hate this song as much as the next guy but if you check out the cheerleaders and put the song on mute it's tolerable.

Via HotClicks

Good Job Good Effort!!!

Is that Dan Lebatard squealing "Good Job Good Effort!" to the downtrodden Miami Heat as they walk off a horrible Game 5 loss on their home court? I only saw the 4th quarter last night but if there was any doubt who the Heat are going to go to when the game is on the line it's most certainly not Lebron James. It's almost as if Lebron is scared to have the game in his hands when he should be taking the ball to the hoop every possession instead of deferring to Dwayne Wade. But I guess if he is a King he relies on others to take the fall for his faults.

Funny Miami Zombie Attack Prank

I love this kind of stuff. Just seeing people scared shitless. I'm not going to lie and say I would stand up to a fake zombie. My ass would be running faster than Usain Bolt. If you look closely at the 2:00 mark you can see some guy pull a gun. Bullets only make Miami zombies snarl.

Forget The Koreans, Meghan Hardin Is The Future Of Women's Golf

With a set of clubs like Meghan Hardin how can you not root for her? You can check out the LPGA's next "big" golfer at her website MeghanHardin.com











Via TheChive

Hey, Pass Me A Beer!

Hey, Pass Me A Beer! from Almost Twins

Throw in a doubleheader of Saturday baseball and right there is what my weekend consists of. Pure, unadulterated beer. All weekend long. See kids alcoholism can be fun as long as you don't go to jail.

EA Sports NCAA Football 13 Creators Have A Sick Sense Of Humor

Hahahaha.

Real fucking funny video game nerds.

Herschel Walker in an Auburn uniform.

Desmond asshat Howard in a Notre Dame uniform.

I consider myself to be a rationale, sensible fan with no big bouts of rage or violence when it comes to sports but all I saw was blood in my eyes when they showed Desmond sporting the Blue and Gold. Are you fucking kidding me?

Whoever decided to give this the go ahead must work for Curt Schilling because it's about the dumbest fucking idea I've ever heard of.

"Yeah haha wouldn't it be great to have Herschel playing on Auburn and Bo Jackson playing on Georgia?" I can pretty much guarantee no true college football fanatic would think it's either a great idea or even worth mentioning it without receiving a black eye.

Thank god almighty they didn't show Tim Brown wearing a Trojans uniform or I would have gone Columbine on the whole EA Sports "creative" team if you know what I mean. Sorry that is being a little harsh. I meant to say I would gouge out their nerdy little eyes and skull fuck the shit out of them. Ah. Much better. Moving on now. Let's just pretend this conversation never happened.

Matt Kemp aka The Bison Break Bats Over Knee, Back on Disabled List

You got to feel for the reigning NL MVP (not a misprint, he was the winner, not Braun) in just Matt Kemp's second game back from the disabled list he re-aggravated the same hamstring rounding the bases last night and went ballistic on a poor bat. I can't blame him. Lingering injuries like hamstrings are the worst. One time I got a paper cut and it took me a good 3-4 days before I could start typing like I wanted to before. And like Kemp I broke some lumber because of the frustration of having to type with my elbows. Granted the lumber was a thin #2 pencil but those things don't break as easily as one would think. It took me at least two karate chops and a couple of tears to break through the yellow ink that makes those damn pencils so hard to shatter. It's tough for athletes like myself and Kemp to sit on the sidelines for any period of time. Two peas in a pod you could say.

Support* us both while we recover with this great "The Bison" t-shirt available exclusively at SportsCrack.com...

* = beer money

Video via The Big Lead

USC Changes motto from Fight On to Porn On

As you know I make fun of USC for a lot of things because A)they're Notre Dame's biggest rival and B)OJ Simpson was a Trojan and C)they can't sell out home games and D)my sister is currently an undergrad there but this new story that just "exploded all over our faces" about the Coliseum being the setting for a porno

I can not. Because seriously who doesn't enjoy porn?

The Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum, home of the USC Trojans, was the setting for a porno movie in 2001. The publicly-owned stadium was used to film “The Gangbang Girl #32.” Shooting took place on one night. Scenes were filmed in a locker room, the Trojans’ tunnel and on the field.

“I was just in awe that we were at the Coliseum,” said a star of the film, who goes by the name Mr. Marcus. “I’ve made movies for about 20 years and I’ve done a lot of things, but that one really stands out.… I mean, who gets to have sex on the Coliseum floor?”

It’s not clear how the company, Anabalic Video, gained access to the stadium and had the lights turned on, though the stadium’s former general manager left the post in 2011 when he was indicted for receiving kickbacks in an unrelated corruption case.

I consider myself a porn expert and I thought they finished up the whole "The Gangbang Girl" series at #30. I had no idea they went up to Marcus Allen territory with old #32 on the same field Marcus tore up the Bruins back in the day. To think that Mr. Marcus was plowing some poor broad at the 50 while the other Marcus Allen was penetrating the defense on the same surface is not disturbing. It's fucking awesome.

NFL Shop And/Or Nike Misspells Aaron Rodgers' Name In Ad

Not a good start for Nike with the exclusive contract to the NFL. You expect some half ass company like SportsCrack to have some grammar mistakes in it because the owner is a drunk with a big heart (big because it's over bloated with whiskey) but you don't expect a huge multinational corporation like Nike to fuck up the spelling of the NFL's biggest star. Aaron "Rodgers" threw for 45 touchdowns and only 6 interceptions last year after winning the Super Bowl the year before. Aaron "Rogers" is some black dude in a Nike ad who just cost a couple of guys at the very least their job.

Via HotClicks via RantSports

I WANT SOME NASTY San Antonio Shirt

If you watched Game 1 of the Western Conference Finals you heard Coach Pop scream at his Spurs team "I WANT SOME NASTY!" Well Coach we are now giving it to you in t-shirt form. The I WANT SOME NASTY t-shirt is now available in sizes small through 3XL. Get your shirt today!

Jim Leyland Gets His Wish: Hawk Harrelson Goes Ape Shit on Umpire

A couple of days ago Detroit Tigers manager Jim "Smoky" Leyland went off on the home umpire for missing a called third strike but not directly at the umpire. Instead he implied the media should start pointing out when the umpires fuck up. Basically Leyland wanted everyone to know the umpires suck balls this year without getting fined for it by suggesting the media do a better job of calling them out. Confusing? Yeah it kind of is but Leyland got his wish last night when White Sox announcer Ken "The Hawk" Harrelson went ape shit after Jose Quintana was ejected for throwing behind the Rays Ben Zobrist. Yes you can put it on the board Hawk. The umpire is as bad as your announcing chops.

Basketball Dicks

Basketball Dicks - watch more funny videos

It's a good thing girls don't talk like that in real life. Am I right girls? Hello? Yeah, that's what I thought. I have nothing to worry about.