MARONEY: I DON'T WANT TO BLOW MY WAD EARLY

I know the guy is excited to play in the Super Bowl or maybe he has seen too much of Giselle running around the locker room but what ever it is Patriots RB Laurence Maroney needs to calm down. This isn't porn, it's football Maroney. Somewhere Peter North is sipping on a Singapore Sling while getting Oreo stuffed by two hotties and thinking "you have no effing idea what's its like bud" while laughing maniacally.