BRAVO RED SOX FANS, BRAVO! I want to see all my Atlanta Braves buddies loading up on the A-Roids shirt when the Yankees come to town on June 23rd. In fact, I would love to see the Ted filled with this shirt or the Yankees Suck shirt. Southerners are known for their politeness, let's debunk that myth with a little humor...
Video HT: Peter
According to Manny Ramirez as quoted in the LA Times, MLB officials should just get off his puss filled back about his steroid suspension and let him show up and practice with the rest of the team...
"I didn't kill nobody, I didn't rape nobody, so that's it," Ramirez said. "I'm just going to come and play the game."
The MLB Draft is wrapping up today and after 50 rounds we pretty much will know nothing about how good a team drafted till at least 5 years down the road. But of course that doesn't stop ESPN's Keith Law in claiming the Red Sox were the big winners in the draft. Seriously, how do you keep up with all 50 of their picks and decide they were the big winner against 30 other teams picking 50 or more players? The MLB Draft is a lot about luck as much as it is about scouting. Guys who could pitch or hit in high school and college might not be able to adjust to playing baseball every day for a living.
As a fan of baseball I for the most part have to go by what scouts say in terms of talent evaluation because a lot of the players I haven't seen in person. There are way too many players out there to keep up with 10% of them so I always find it funny that experts like Keith Law can tell you who the winners and losers of the MLB Draft are before the thing is even over. What makes me laugh even more is Law is basing a lot of his judgements on what scouts tell him. Which makes me wonder if the scouts are being honest or just blowing smoke up his ass about certain prospects because they "discovered" them. Who knows but I did find this quote from an anonymous scout regarding the Nate McLouth trade to Atlanta very interesting if not borderline hysterical in Jayson Stark's latest Rumblings and Grumblings:
• Pitt Stop: We've heard mixed reviews around baseball on the package the Pirates got back for Nate McLouth. But one scout who has seen a lot of all three players thinks all three could be stars.
"I really like [left-hander Jeff] Locke," he said. "To me, he has a chance to be Jon Lester. And if [right-hander Charlie] Morton just throws strike one, he'll win 15-16 games a year, if not more. And one thing no one can dispute is that [outfielder] Gorkys Hernandez has five tools. Those tools still need a lot of work. But he can be a top-of-the-order guy who can give you power and produce runs. And he can run and throw and play some kind of center field. So to me, that was a deal where both teams got what they wanted and needed."
Okay, her name is Heather Graham, but if you ever saw Boogie Nights she will always be known to penises around the world as "Roller Girl." Here are some pictures of the actress at the England premiere of The Hangover...
Nick Montana, a four star high school quarterback who just happens to be Joe Montana's youngest son, has turned down offers from Notre Dame, Georgia, and Ohio State to go play for...get this...hold laughter till I complete the sentence...the University of Washington. Yes, the same Huskies school that went 0-12 last season. Okay, now you can release the shits and giggles.
Nick apparently fell in love with new head coach Steve Sarkisian. Take a look at this zinger:
"He's an awesome coach," Montana said, according to the report. "You just have to look at all the guys he's put into the pros."
It's 9 AM on a weekday in Philadelphia and the Penguin Danny Devito is slamming beers, making midget jokes, and trying to score some strange. I have a new found respect for the little guy. You can't blame him for trying. I can only imagine the stories that Devito has working in Hollywood for over 30 years. If he can become a movie "star" and score tons of ass then you...yes...you the reader...put that away, it's inappropriate, have no excuse not to get off your ass and become something. Devito was the Terminator's twin at one point! Dreams can come true. Now quit your 9-to-5 job and go make me proud!
HT: WWTDD
I've been thinking about putting some stuff on Craigslist lately. No, not selling my body or anything like that. I'm not that desperate...yet. I've been doing some brainstorming, thinking of clever ways to pitch my junk so it sounds like gold on Craigslist. As you probably know it's all about how you sell it or market it. But I think when all else fails and you don't feel like dealing with people you should put out a classified like this guy did in Richmond...(click on the image to enlarge it)...
I think you get the idea of what he is selling and how he wants to go about the transaction. No bullshitting, just fork over the money and take the cement blocks. With that being said I'm going to copy this guy's approach. Anybody know what I can fetch for Pete Carroll's dead hookers?
Craigslist HT: Joe
Yesterday I gave you my American League All-Star ballot. No complaints with my picks so far. Either nobody reads this blog or people actually agree. Any who here are my National League picks, feel free to blast away!
NATIONAL LEAGUE
Firstbasemen-Albert Pujols, St. Louis Cardinals-Adrian Gonzalez for the San Diego Padres and Prince Fielder of the Milwaukee Brewers are having terrific seasons but still, we are talking about Albert freaking Pujols. He is the best player in the game. MVPujols is top 5 in almost every significant batting stat in the majors. The guy is like fine wine. He's only getting better. Pujols was drafted in the 13th round(402nd overall) by the Cardinals in the 1999 draft. What a steal of a pick!
Secondbasemen-Chase Utley, Philadelphia Phillies-Uts is a machine. This season is perhaps his best right now as he has a career high on base percentage of .435 and again is leading the majors in hit by pitches with 11. The guy does it all and is a gritty player that every team would love to have. Utley was drafted in the 1st round(15th overall) by the Phillies in the 2000 draft out of UCLA. The Orioles had the 14th pick that year. They took Beau Hale. I would say the Phillies franchise won that pick.
Shortstop-Hanley Ramirez, Florida Marlins-If you had a pick to start at shortstop who would you take? I'm thinking 80% or more would pick Ramirez. Hanley is again having a terrific season and should only heat up more as the weather becomes unbearable in South Florida. Last season Ramirez had a 30/30 season at the age of 24 while winning the Silver Slugger award. This season he has become more of a team leader and is the franchise player in the Marlins organization. Ramirez was signed as an amateur free agent by the Red Sox as a 16 year old out of the Dominican Republic.
Thirdbasemen-Chipper Jones, Atlanta Braves-The future Hall of Famer deserves to be starting in the All Star game in St. Louis this year. Larry again leads the majors in on base percentage and has a good shot at repeating his batting title. It's almost a crime that he has only played in 6 All Star games in his 16 years of MLB ball. I hope the voters do the right thing and put Chipper in the starting lineup. David Wright is having a fine season for the New York Mets but he still isn't close to Chipper's league. Chipper was drafted in the 1st round(1st overall) by the Braves in the 1990 draft out of high school. The Braves organization wanted to draft Todd Van Poppel but backed away because of signing issues. Thank god.
Catcher-Brian McCann, Atlanta Braves-McCann has bounced back from some eye issues this season and posted All-Star numbers batting in the 4 and 5 hole for the Bravos. In just his 4th season the 3 time All-Star is again leading all NL catchers in on base percentage and slugging percentage. McCann was drafted in the 2nd round(64th overall) in the 2002 draft by the Braves out of high school.
Rightfield-Justin Upton, Arizona Diamondbacks-As a 21 year old Upton is just beginning to come into his own. A freak of an athlete, the younger Upton is top 10 in slugging percentage, on base percentage, total bases, triples, extra base hits and runs created. He also plays an excellent right field and has a cannon for an arm. Upton was the first pick overall in the 2005 Draft which could go down as one of the best drafts ever.
Centerfield-Carlos Beltran, New York Mets-The 4 time All-Star is having one of his best statistical seasons in 2009. He is top 5 in on base percentage (as you can see this is a very important stat to me) and batting average. He also plays gold glove defense in center. Beltran was a 2nd round draft (49th overall) pick by the Royals in the 1995 draft out of high school.
Leftfield-Ryan Braun, Milwaukee Brewers-The Hebrew Hammer is again on pace to hit at least 30 home runs while driving in over 100. He may not be excellent in the field but his OBP is above 40% this year and he is drawing a ton of walks. Braun was drafted in the 1st round (5th overall) in the 2005 draft by the Brewers out of Miami.
Starting pitcher-Dan Haren, Arizona Diamondbacks-Haren only has 4 wins but that isn't his fault. His stuff has been nasty again this season and his strikeout to walk ratio is nearly 8-to-1. In my opinion he is the Roy Halladay of the National League. Haren was drafted in the 2nd round(72nd overall) in the 2001 draft by the Cardinals out of Pepperdine University. For some bizarre reason Haren has already been traded twice in his young career.
The #1 free safety in college football for 2009, USC Senior Taylor Mays, does a little interview(i.e. picks his next notch on his belt) with the USC Song Girls. You may have heard of them. Mays is a future top 10 pick in the NFL and many people wonder including myself why he would come back to USC when he was guaranteed a fat paycheck if he left after his junior campaign. Well, now I think we know why. Let's just say the Song Girls can be very persuasive. You can't find top notch talent like that in Green Bay.
I know some of you are wondering how I came upon this video being a Notre Dame supporter. Pete Carroll posted it on Facebook. Yes, I am one of the Poodle's "friends." Why you ask? Because to beat the enemy sometimes you have to sleep with the enemy. Oh and I am also looking forward to giving him some grief come October 17th after the Irish beat them.
With the MLB Draft just hours away, otherwise known as the Stephen Strasburg overkill draft, I decided to get my mind off of it a little bit by filling out my All-Star ballot. You can go to www.vote.mlb.com. No longer do you have to bother punching out little circles on a ballot and turning them in at the ballpark. The powers of technology. I'm pretty sure the internet was invented for this alone. Here is my ballot, broken down by position and also a recap of where the player was originally drafted.
AMERICAN LEAGUE
Firstbasemen-Justin Morneau, Minnesota Twins-This was one of the hardest picks for me. Morneau is currently having a great season, batting .329 with the most RBIs at first with 52. The former MVP wins a close race with Mark Teixeira, Miguel Cabrera, Kevin Youkilis, and Russell Branyan all having outstanding years. You could make a case for all of those guys deserving a shot to start but when it came down to picking the one who I would want to be up at bat with the game on the line it was Morneau. Morneau was drafted in the 3rd round(89th overall) by the Twins in the 1999 draft as a catcher.
Secondbasemen-Aaron Hill, Toronto Blue Jays-Hill has been outstanding for the Jays all season. Hitting .310 with 13 HRs and 41 RBIs, Hill has rebounded from an injury shortened 2008 season to establish himself as one of the best 2B in the game. His defense has been solid too. Hill is a big reason why the Blue Jays are still contending in the AL East despite the rest of the offense struggling. Hill was drafted in the 1st round(13th overall) by the Jays in the 2003 draft out of LSU.
Shortstop-Jason Bartlett, Tampa Bay Rays-Bartlett was one of the easiest vote on my ballot. He currently leads the majors in hitting at .373 and has played stellar defense as usual at a premium defensive position. One of the most underrated players in the game, Bartlett should at the very least be named a reserve because there is no way he will overtake Derek Jeter in voting. Bartlett was drafted in the 13th round(390th overall) by the Padres in the 2001 draft out of Oklahoma.
Thirdbasemen-Evan Longoria, Tampa Bay Rays-Evan Almighty is having a MVP season in just his 2nd year in the bigs. Hitting at a .316 clip while leading the majors in RBIs with 55, Longoria is one of the games top 10 players already. His defense is also great and he reminds me a lot of Chipper Jones in terms of his approach to each at-bat. He doesn't get cheated. It should be mentioned that Chone Figgins, Michael Young, and Brandon Inge are also having All-Star seasons and this wasn't a sure fire pick with Longoria. Longoria was drafted in the 1st round(3rd overall) by the Rays in the 2006 draft out of Long Beach State.
Catcher-Joe Mauer, Minnesota Twins-Mauer is just in a different league right now. By far the best catcher in the game, Mauer has been on a tear since he came off the disabled list. He is hitting .413 with 12 HR(13 is his career high) and the 2 time All-Star could garner his first MVP trophy if he continues his torrid start. Mauer was the 1st overall pick in the 2001 draft by the Twins out of high school.
Rightfield-Ichiro Suzuki, Seattle Mariners-Ichiro is just a phenomenal player. The guy does it all. I can only imagine how big of a star he would be if he played on the east coast. I have a serious man crush on Ichiro because the guy plays baseball the way it should be played. Hustler is a good way. Ichiro was not drafted. He was signed as a free agent by the Mariners in 2001 after playing in Japan where he was an established superstar.
Centerfield-Adam Jones, Baltimore Orioles-Bazooka Jones has come into his own in 2009 batting in the 2 hole for the Baltimore Orioles. Top 10 in the AL in a ton of offensive categories, Jones has shown a set of skills that will make him a superstar for years to come. Jones was a 1st round supplemental (37th overall) pick by the Mariners in the 2003 draft out of high school.
Leftfield-Carl Crawford, Tampa Bay Rays-The 4 time AL stolen base champ has rebounded from some injuries in 2008 to again lead the majors in stolen bases with 34. Crawford was drafted in the 2nd round (52nd overall) in the 1999 draft by the Rays out of high school.
Starting pitcher-Zack Greinke, Kansas City Royals-Zack Attack leads the majors in ERA at 1.55 and has a nearly 9-to-1 K to BB ratio. His last start wasn't Greinke like but other than that he has shut the door down on offenses. An argument could be made for Roy Halladay right here and honestly you couldn't go wrong with either. But Greinke gets my pick because overall he has been more dominating than Halladay. Greinke was drafted in the 1st round(6th overall) in the 2002 draft by the Royals out of high school.
Oh how I miss the Charlie Murphy skits on the Chappelle Show. This infomercial made my sides hurt. I'm buying it and you should too.
While Roger Federer is on his way to his record tying 14th Grand Slam title and his first French Open conquest some crazy douche bag rushed on the court. He ran up to Federer and touched him, causing Federer to look very concerned. But since Federer is Swiss he remained completely neutral. The French security got off their asses and didn't retreat this time. Hell, the security guy who makes the open court tackle should be auditioning for a NFL job with the textbook form he displayed.
UPDATE
Federer wins in straight sets to complete his career Grand Slam. Federer is a class act and I'm happy to see him finally conquer a French title. He is now tied with Pete Sampras with 14 Grand Slams and if he can win the Wimbledon in 3 weeks over Rafael Nadal he might be considered the greatest tennis player of all-time. Of course Nadal fans have a good argument against that title but today is Federer day. Viva la Federer!
The way the Lakers played tonight I doubt this series goes beyond 5 games now. Kobe was sick.
Seriously, what the fuck is Randy Johnson's problem? I could have sworn the announcers just said he won his 300th MLB game becoming just the 24th member in the exclusive club but the guy can't as much as fake a smile. He just looks like a miserable s.o.b. Even when his son hugs him he has the look of a guy who is about to jump off the top of a building. Even David Carradine has smiled more in the past 24 hours and he is fucking dead dude. So get rid of the frown Big Unit. You will be going into the Hall of Fame. You have made over $167 million in your career. You got a World Series ring.
But yeah, with this mug life must really suck.
In 7 games the Lakers will beat the Orlando Magic. Kobe Bryant will be the MVP and get his 4th ring. I could bullshit you and tell you that the Lakers front court with Paul Gasol and Andrew Bynum will be able to hang with Dwight Superman Howard but I really have no idea what I am talking about. I don't usually watch the NBA regular season unless I am attending an Atlanta Hawks game at Philips. But the NBA playoffs this year has been really exciting to watch and I haven't been this into it since Jordan was playing. I hope the Magic win but I think the Lakers have the better team. It should be a great series.
''I will calmly wait for my induction to the Baseball Hall of Fame,'' the former Cubs slugger told the Web site after speaking at a government-sponsored event in the Dominican Republic. ''Don't I have the numbers to be inducted?''
Yesterday was a great day if you are an Atlanta Braves fan. GM Frank Wren earned his paycheck while making some moves that should set up the Braves as a serious contender for a Wild Card run at the very least. The Braves offense has been struggling all season due mainly to a horrible outfield in terms of offensive production. Outfielder's Jordan Schafer, Jeff Francoeur and Garrett Anderson have been miserable in terms of contributions to the offense minus a couple of highlights this season. Wren saw the glaring weakness and made a great trade yesterday getting Pittsburgh All-Star Nate McLouth.
The best part of the trade was the Braves gave up relatively little to get a guy in McLouth who is wrapped up contract wise through 2011. The Braves traded minor league starters Charlie Morton(complete garbage in my humble opinion) and Jeff Locke(was getting hit hard in A ball) and promising young centerfielder Gorkys Hernandez(who has yet to hit a single HR in 212 AB's in AA). Essentially the Braves gave away minor league scrap metal to the Pittsburgh Pirates for their only All-Star. Hell yeah! If you ever wonder why the Pittsburgh Pirates organization has been shit for so long take a look at this trade along with their deals last season when they let Jason Bay and Xavier Nady go. McLouth will start in center for the recently demoted Schafer tonight against the Cubs and should get a warm welcome in Atlanta. McLouth is a solid defender (Gold Glover last season) who can steal bases with a MLB leading 92.8% successful stolen base percentage since the start of the 2005 season. And he also hit 26 home runs last year which is more than the whole Braves outfield combined last season. Great move by Wren and the Braves. Puzzling move by the Pirates letting go of a 27 year old foundation type player in McLouth.
The other great move by Wren yesterday was to give Tom Glavine his release and usher in the Tommy Hanson era. Braves fans love Glavine
because he was instrumental in their only World Series title in 1995 pitching the game of his life against the Cleveland Indians. He was a crafty lefty who won multiple Cy Youngs and over 300 victories. He is a sure-fire first ballot Hall of Famer. But Glavine's time as a MLB starter is done. The 43 year old is way past his prime and was simply atrocious last season in the rotation. Remember the Braves paid him handsomely last season to get 2 victories on his belt while sporting an ERA north of 5.50. Roughly they paid him $4 million per victory. Glavine's career is done and don't feel sorry for him or feel like the Braves organization screwed him in anyway. Nobody was knocking on Glavine's door this offseason trying to sign him. The Braves did him a favor by giving him the chance to come back to Atlanta last year and finish out his career for the team he started. Remember Glavine was one of the union leaders during the strike and left the Braves in 2003 for the hated Mets for a contract that panned out to be one year more than the Braves were offering for similar money. He showed no loyalty to the Braves organization then so why should any Braves fan feel sorry for him now. He is washed up and a huge part of me hopes the New York Mets or Philadelphia Phillies sign him. Both teams need pitching. This would be the collective reaction of Braves fans if this indeed happened...
But anyways that is all water under the bridge. The thing that gets me really excited is to see the #1 pitching prospect in all of baseball in Tommy Hanson make his debut Saturday. Hanson is going to remind Braves fans a lot of John Smoltz. The 6'6 righty has been amazing the past two seasons in minor league ball and the Arizona Fall League. In AAA Gwinnett this season he has struck out 90 batters in only 66 innings while holding batters to a .169 BA. Chipper Jones stated he had the most impressive stuff of all the Braves pitchers in spring training. Hanson will join a staff that includes Derek Lowe, Jair Jurrjens, Javier Vasquez and Kenshin Kawakami. In other words the best pitching staff in the National League. Hanson was clocked up to 99 MPH in spring training and has an incredible curve ball and a very good changeup. He has future ace written all over him and should be the foundation for the Braves rotation for the next decade.
The Braves right now sit at 26 wins and 26 losses. They are in third place, 5.5 games out behind the Mets and Phillies in the NL East. With their arms they have the ability to go the distance. They just need the hitting. Hopefully Frank Wren is still looking for bats because the Braves are still incredibly weak at the power hitting positions(RF, LF, 1B) besides thirdbase with Chipper. And even thirdbase is a question mark with Chipper's health. Players like Luke Scott, Aubrey Huff, Matt Holliday, Lance Berkman, and others could be had if the Braves put together the right package. I would love to see them add Scott because he is a cheap player (2.4 million) who is still under team control for at least the next two seasons. He would add some serious pop to left field and is a great clubhouse guy. I would think the Braves would have to give up prospect 1b Freddie Freeman to get him which would be a great trade for both sides.
The future is now for the Atlanta Braves. Thank God.
