SportsCrack Blog

Friday, January 25, 2008


The man of a thousand coaching jobs the past 5 years, none other than the stache himself, new Atlanta Falcons defensive coordinator Brian Van Gorder has been named Realtor of the Year according to Not only has Van Gorder managed to change jobs more often than Lindsay Lohan blows guys for movie roles, but he has also distinguished himself as a real estate agent's wet dream the past 5 years. Since 2002 Van Gorder has moved from Athens as the defensive coordinator for the Bulldogs to Jacksonville for a NFL defensive assistant coaching job. Of course Jacksonville bored the shit out of him so he moved onto Statesboro to be the head football coach at Georgia Southern. After a successful run of nearly destroying a great football program in Statesboro he moved back to the NFL to take an assistant job working with the Atlanta Falcons. But Van Gorder decided he just wasn't cut out to be a linebacker's coach for the Falcons after "only one season(due in large part with sharing the same values of Bobby Petrino) and accepted a position in Columbia, SC to be the new DC for the Gamecocks. After accepting the job and moving his family to Columbia Van Gorder decided college life was the place he wanted to stay for good:

A month ago, VanGorder declared to the Journal-Constitution: "I'm a college guy." When asked if he was sure, he replied, "I've declared. I'm committed."

"I'll enjoy all the things about college football that I always have and I won't look back at the NFL," VanGorder said in December.

"That's something I've put behind. I'm ready to finish my career as a college football coach."

But it doesn't end there for the Realtor of the Year as today Van Gorder decided to come back to Atlanta and be the defensive coordinator for the Falcons after only three weeks on the job in Columbia. But wait a second, "I thought the stache decided the college game was his cup of tea," you ask?

Apparently not. I guess Arthur Blank got his wish in Van Gorder who seems to be a lot more stable than Petrino when it comes to switching jobs. So here is to you Van Gorder as the Realtor of the Year. You alone have kept real estate in the South booming despite all the foreclosures. May your stint be shorter than a Mexican hooker!

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1 comment:

Captain Jimmy said...

Funny as hell!!! "the stash" is a Nomad.

I hope th e Falsons suck this year