-MacG managed to get his sneaky camera out while with his lady and capture some tennis poon at the Legg Mason Tennis Classic. I was there with him but hold no accountability for those great poon shots.
-According to WithLeather there is another case of Rape going on at Duke University. When will they ever learn?
-On205th.com has pictures of WAG Danielle Lloyd(pictured on the right) touching herself while sunbathing in a bikini. Funny how she pretends to not notice the camera 4 feet from her face.
Julio Jones, WR, Alabama-The nation's #1 rated wide receiver out of high school and Bama fan's #1 reason for optimism going into the 2008 season is the spectacular Julio Jones. Jones is a 6'4, 210 pound receiver who has been named the starter going into the season opener against Clemson this Saturday. Julio is a freak of an athlete with the ability to have a tremendous freshman season catching passes from senior John Parker Wilson. His impact should be immediate in Tuscaloosa and don't be surprised if a lot of people are talking Heisman especially if he has a huge game against Clemson. Julio has also already earned the respect from his teammates.
"He's not out boasting about, what (he's) going to do. He just lets his actions speak louder than his words."
Here is a highlight of Julio catching a bomb from Wilson and giving a stiff arm during fall practice...
Darrell Scott, RB, Colorado-Scott was the #1 rated RB coming out of high school in California and spurned numerous offers including one from Texas to pick the Buffaloes. Currently listed #2 on the depth chart behind sophomore Demetrius Sumler, it is just a matter of time before Scott gets the majority of the carries and makes a name for himself in the Big 12 conference. Coach Dan Hawkins has stated he wants all of his RB's to get a lot of carries to keep them fresh but there is little doubt Scott is the most talented of the group and will get more carries as he improves his pass blocking. Here is a Darrell Scott interview with Lemming before his senior season in Ventura, Ca...
Michael Floyd, WR, Notre Dame-Floyd comes into Notre Dame as the most highly touted WR since Maurice Stovall. Unlike Stovall though Floyd isn't a work in progress and already runs great routes, has consistent hands, and knows most of the plays which will enable him to make an instant impact starting next week against San Diego State. The 6'3, 205 pound receiver from Minnesota is currently second on the depth chart behind senior WR David Grimes but don't be surprised if he is the starter by the second week of the season against Michigan. Floyd provides QB Clausen a big target who has the body to separate himself from DB's to the contrary of the smaller Grimes. Expectations were huge coming into fall camp for Floyd and he has yet to disappoint.
"Michael Floyd," said CBS College Sports recruiting analyst Tom Lemming, "will be able to run the routes, will be able to block, will be able to handle the pressure of being the best wide receiver prospect to walk in the door since Randy Moss tried to (and was turned away in 1995), because Michael has both feet on the ground.
"He sees the big picture. He's not going to have the highs and lows of being a prodigy. He's got such an even temperament and mature perspective. And he's a leader, so people will follow him."
Kyle Rudolph, TE, Notre Dame-Another Notre Dame player to be on the lookout is starting tight end Kyle Rudolph. The #1 rated TE coming out of Elder High School in Cincinatti, Rudolph has passed junior Will Yeatman on the depth chart and was named the starter after sophomore Mike Ragone went down with a knee injury last week.
“He runs down the field faster than the rest of them,” Weis said. "I'm very, very high on Kyle Rudolph," Weis said. "What Kyle Rudolph lacks a little bit in explosion at the line of scrimmage — in comparison to a more veteran player — he makes up in straight-line speed. I mean, the kid gets down the field in a hurry. He's got great ball skills. Anytime you've got a tight end who can run, who is at least an adequate blocker, you know you've got something."
A.J. Green, WR, Georgia-What Matthew Stafford has been missing since he arrived in Athens since leaving his Texas high school days is a tall, play making WR who can stretch the field. Actually if you ask Bulldog fans they will tell you he has been missing one who can actually catch the ball consistently. No worries UGA fans because Stafford finally has one. A. J. Green will not start against Georgia Southern but his impact should be immediate. The 6'4 lanky receiver who has been compared to Randy Moss in some recruiting circles currently is the #2 flanker behind senior WR Mohamed Massaquoi but should be in a lot of offensive plays where the offensive coordinator Mike Bobo looks to spread the defense apart. Green made an early commitment to the Bulldogs during his junior season in high school and will look to be the go-to target for Stafford during his freshman season. At 6'4 and 200 pounds, Green looks the part of a dominant receiver and his hands look more like bear paws ready to haul in game changing TD's this fall in the SEC.
"He doesn't know everything obviously yet; he has not played in a game," Eason said. "There's a lot of potential there and it's potential that we've seen flashes of a guy that could be pretty good."
DaQuan Bowers, DE, Clemson-Bowers is a freak. An early enrollee, Bowers will start this Saturday against Alabama as Clemson looks to win their first ACC title since 1991. The #1 rated DE coming out of high school, Bowers is a 6'4, 270 pound specimen who can run a faster 40 time then a lot of runningbacks and receivers. Bowers will remind Clemson fans of Gaines Adams quickly.
Terrelle Pryor, QB, Ohio State-Never heard of this guy before today. Okay, all kidding aside we all know about Pryor and the Corvettes and the shady recruiting. Currently listed #3 on the depth chart behind Todd Boeckman and Joe Bauserman, he is essentially a co-#2 with Bauserman who will used much like Tim Tebow was his freshman season in Gainesville. The USA Today Player of the Year stands at 6'6 and looks a lot like Vince Young when lined up behind center. His athleticism is off the charts and he should see significant time this year including the home opener against Youngstown State.
Will Hill, S, Florida-The freshman strong safety from New Jersey sits currently #2 on the depth chart behind Ahmad Black but should see plenty of playing time this year. Hill wears #10 and should become a permanent fixture in the Gator's secondary which just happened to be atrocious last year. I expect Hill to be starting by midseason and he should also provide an impact on special teams because athletically he is so far ahead of the upperclassmen. Once his football knowledge catches up with his talent look out because the sky is the limit for Hill.
Marcus Robinson, DE, Miami-With all the attention fellow classmates LB Arthur Brown and DT Marcus Forston received during their recruiting process it comes as a bit of a surprise neither will be starting this Thursday but Robinson will be. A converted linebacker out of high school, Robinson's athleticism and the Hurricane's numerous suspensions have given him a chance to make his mark against Charles Southern. A bit undersized, Robinson will be used much like Terrell Suggs was at Arizona State. Sometimes he will have his hand down and other times he will be playing a hybrid outside linebacker. His impact will be immediate as the Canes field an extremely young squad under second year coach Randy Shannon.
Rahim Moore, S, UCLA-A five star prospect out of the Los Angeles area, Moore decided to stay close to home with UCLA and has already nailed down the starting strong safety position for the Bruins. Moore shows great maturity for a freshman and can play cornerback also if the Bruins need him. Expect the talented Moore to remind UCLA fans of Eric Turner when he bulks up a little bit.
Others to look out for on a campus near you: Jonathan Baldwin, WR, Pittsburgh; Stephfon Green, RB, Penn State; Gerell Robinson, WR, Arizona State; Richard Samuel, RB, Georgia; Blake Gideon, S, Texas; Earl Thomas, S, Texas; Ethan Johnson, DE, Notre Dame; Blake Ayles, TE, USC; Don'ta Hightower, LB, Alabama
MATT FAIRCHILD BREAKS DOWN THE BIG EAST AND GIVES HIS PREDICTIONS The Big East conference is kind of like the Rodney Dangerfield of College Football. They don't get a lot of respect because of the gimmick offenses and the defenses made of undersized blind Canadians. And by Canadians I mean football players from the Northeast who wouldn't stand a chance in the South and by blind I mean they suck for the most part. Don't get me wrong there are some really good players in the conference but anyone of these teams would struggle from week-to-week playing a tough SEC schedule. Hell, Rich Rodriguez finally came to his senses! Kidding Mountaineers fans, kidding. Let's take a look at the Dangerfields...
THE ELITE TEAMS:
WEST VIRGINIA MOUNTAINEERS-As some of you may have heard a coach by the name of Rich Rodriguez, otherwise known as DickRod for the uninformed, decided to leave his cushy job at his alma mater to go to big bad Michigan. In short nobody liked the move and most people consider DickRod an assbag who will fail miserably in Ann Arbor and prove how much of a whore he has become. But you know what? Fuck him! Time to move on everybody. QB Pat White returns for what seems like his 8th season in Morgantown(actually his 4th starting) after winning conference player of the year honors the past two seasons. White is a great college player and one of my favorite players to watch. The kid is so silky smooth I want to lick him up and then poop him out in a waffle cone only to be consumed again. Yeah, he is that good. Steve Slaton is gone but he was overrated anyways and now enters the Devine one named Noel. Noel is a small back who only averaged 8.6 YPC as a true freshman. Yeah, he blows. Devine is like one of those wind-up dog dolls that jump around and bark all the time. He should have a monster season along with White. The offense will sure as shit put a lot of points on the board but the question remains if they will able to stop anybody? Nope. Their defense could be awful this year with only 4 returning starters. Of course it won't matter too much since they play in the Big East and they get Rutgers and South Florida in Morgantown. A huge Thursday night game against Auburn in Morgantown will help the conference gain some respect it thinks it deserves and a Friday night game against Pittsburgh at Heinz could determine who wins the conference. I see at least 10 wins with a healthy Pat White. They won't contend for a National Title but they will get in a BCS bowl game.
THE CONTENDERS:
SOUTH FLORIDA BULLS-Almost everybody in the media are licking the Bulls balls this summer thinking they are the most talented team in the conference. Personally I don't like to lick Bulls balls. I love a lot of aspects on their squad including the 17 returning starters who won 9 games last year and at one point reached #2 in the country but their most important player I can't stand. QB Matt Grothe has Reggie Ball-like symptoms of making some of the dumbest fucking decisions you will see a QB make in a game. Maybe he brings it all together for his senior season but I just don't see it happening.
PITTSBURGH PANTHERS-I know what you are saying, "Pitt can't win with a coach like Wannstedt leading the way" but I actually think they will compete in this conference because of RB Lesean McCoy and LB Scott McKillop. Both are among the top 10 at their respective position in the nation and both have the ability to control some aspect of the game. Their defense should be the best in the Big East and if they can learn how to score some TD's when in the red zone this team could surprise a lot of people including West Virginia again.
RUTGERS SCARLET KNIGHTS-Rutgers should be able to put a lot of points on the board this season despite the loss of RB Ray Rice to the NFL. Senior QB Mike Teel has all four of his top WR's back including All-Big East Tiquan Underwood. The defense returns 8 starters but let's be honest they aren't that good. Last year they finished tied for 2nd to last in the conference and should improve even without Rice. They will go as far as Teel leads them.
FALLING BACK TEAMS:
CINCINNATI BEARCATS-Brian Kelly's program should again be solid but they won't repeat last year's #17 finish. QB Ben Mauk isn't returning for his 11th season of college football and ND transfer Demetrius Jones is recovering from a bum shoulder.
LOUISVILLE CARDINALS-Only 9 returning starters to a program slowly going down in shambles after Bobby Petrino slithered out of town, the Cardinals have a hot shot QB prospect in Hunter Cantwell.
CONNECTICUT HUSKIES-It is true that UCONN is the defending Big East co-champions and coach Randy Edsall is one of the best in the Big East at getting his team ready for battles they have no right to win. But it still is UCONN and the talent isn't there to compete.
TEAMS THAT SUCK AND BLOW AT THE SAME TIME:
SYRACUSE ORANGEMEN-Coach Robinson has finished dead last in his first 3 seasons and they still are the worst team this year by far. Until the get players like Donovan McNabb or Marvin Harrison they will not be able to compete for a bowl.
BEST GAME: WEST VIRGINIA AT PITT (November 28th)-You remember what happened last year during this contest right? All WVU had to do was beat a 28 point dog at home to go to their first ever BCS Title game and yet they completely screwed the pooch and lost. Pitt should be much better this season and the Mountaineers are looking for revenge. It should be a hell of a battle.
WORST GAME: NORTHEASTERN AT SYRACUSE (September 20th)-Watching these two teams could be hazardous to your health both mentally and physically.
MOST OVERRATED GAME: No idea(?)-I'm completely stumped on this one. Most of their games are exciting at the least.
BEST OFFENSIVE PLAYER: West Virginia QB Pat White can do it all whether running the ball or throwing some perfect spirals. He is the Charlie Ward of his era.
BEST DEFENSIVE PLAYER: South Florida defensive end George Selvie is a returning 1st team All-American who led the nation in tackles for loss with 31.5 with 14.5 being the quarterback variety.
BEST FRESHMAN: Pittsburgh WR Jonathan Baldwin is 6'6 and should be used as a big target in the red zone offense. A little raw coming out of high school, his talent will get him on the field quickly for coach Wanny.
MOST LIKELY TO GET ARRESTED: Willie Williams is no longer playing for Louisville after getting kicked out so this makes it a little more difficult and as far as I know there isn't a Vick in the conference. I'm going to go with Mikhail Marinovich of Syracuse. He already has been arrested once for a school break in and if we have learned anything over the years it is you can never put your trust in a Marinovich.
MOST LIKELY TO BE FIRED: Syracuse coach Greg Robinson will be gone if they finish in the Big East basement yet again as I suspect they will.
PLAYER WHO WILL BE BETTER THAN WHAT PEOPLE THINK: Rutgers left tackle Anthony Davis is just a sophomore but is a star in the making. He will be earning millions on the next level and I would die for him to be wearing a Notre Dame uniform
DOESN'T MAKE SENSE AWARD: Why are there only 8 teams in the conference? The Big East needs to add at least 2 more teams. My alma mater Georgia State is finally getting a football program in 2010 and they would be a good fit since they will be playing in the Georgia Dome and they don't know how to play defense.
THE WINNER IS: Everybody is high on South Florida this season but I don't see it. I still think West Virginia, with a healthy Pat White, is the team to beat and will be making their 3rd BCS bowl game in 4 years under White. The kid is a legend!
The old geezer still has it. I might not understand a word he says but JoePa doesn't put up with shit from anybody. It's really too bad he shit on himself about 4 times in this clip. I would be scared to death of an old man coming at me after he shit all over himself.
Letter to JoePa's attorney: the poo comment is satire and no, I do not wish to be sued.
My shirt will remain tucked by the way. No reason to piss off JoePa.
Hey everybody, College Football season is only a few days away and what better way to celebrate it then by giving away free stuff. Of course to win the free stuff you need a functional college football brain and the ability to pick the most winners each week while doing keg stands at the tailgate.
The contest is completely free and you can join by clicking here. Who ever picks the most winners for that particular week will win a free Sportscrack or DLACT shirt of their choice. All you have to do is join, pick your winners before the games start on Thursday, and remember it is only about picking the winner of the game and not betting against the spread.
MATT FAIRCHILD BREAKS DOWN THE BIG TWELVE AND GIVES HIS PREDICTIONS The Big Twelve has 4 legitimate BCS Bowl game contenders in Oklahoma, Texas Tech, Missouri, and Texas this year and could claim the title as best conference over the SEC in terms of heavyweights. Top to bottom the SEC is better but I would be lying if I didn't think Missouri could give Georgia a run of their money as best team in the country this year.
THE ELITE TEAMS:
MISSOURI TIGERS-The Tigers should have been in a BCS game last year but got completely hosed when Illinois and Kansas got the knod even though the Tigers beat both and finished with as good if not better records than both. This year the Tigers will again be playing with a chip on their shoulder as a lot of experts think this is Oklahoma's conference to win and the Tigers are nothing but a flash in the pan. QB Chase Daniel returns for his senior season after a magical junior campaign in which he won Big 12 player of the year honors and finished 4th in the Heisman. For years Chase has been told he can't be a big time QB because he is too short or he picks his nose too often and it's with this scruting or doubt in which he makes himself better and his team. Yes, Missouri is his team. He will look to get the ball into the playmaking hands of WR Jeremy Maclin who had a ridiculous 2776 total yards last season as a freshman. Maclin can do it all and should also be considered a serious Heisman candidate along with Daniels. The offensive line loses a couple of starters at center and left tackle but the group as a whole is experienced and talented and should gel quickly. 6 of the front 7 on defense return including All-Big 12 linebacker Sean Weatherspoon. The secondary has one of the best defensive players in the nation in FS William Moore. Moore is a force when blitzing or covering and should position himself into a top NFL pick. The Tigers avoid Oklahoma and Texas Tech during the regular season and from top to bottom are the best team in the Big 12 North division. They face a tough out of conference opener against Illinois in St. Louis but Mizzou has won 6 straight openers by an average score of 40-19. They finish the regular season with a battle against Kansas in Kansas City but I believe Kansas is in for a down year after being so high last year. The one loss I see on their schedule is a road trip to Austin on October 18th. Why you ask? Only because the last time Mizzou won in Austin was 1896...wow!
OKLAHOMA SOONERS-Talent wise the Sooners are the best team in the Big 12 South and they should have an explosive offense led by returning QB Sam Bradford. Bradford had an excellent redshirt freshman season completing 70% of his passes while throwing for 36 TD's and only 8 INT's. He will have plenty of protection this season as all 5 starters return on the offensive line including All-American candidates Duke Robinson and Phil Loadholt. RB Demarco Murray is a little banged up and might not be ready for the season opener against Chattanooga but fingers are crossed in Norman he will be ready by the Red River Shootout. Leading receiver Juaquin Iglesias is back along with top tight end Jermaine Gresham who should be a Mackey Award candidate. The Sooners defense has been atrocious the last 3 BCS bowl game appearances and it will dictate whether or not the Sooners contend for a National Title. The defensive line is stacked with All-American candidates in Auston English, DeMarcus Granger, and Gerald McCoy. Many programs are just happy with one of those guys and yet the Sooners can put out 3 which will remind a lot of people of what the New York Giants did against the Patriots in the Super Bowl. The linebacker core will need to mature as inexperience could be a factor early on but look out for middle linebacker Ryan Reynolds. The same can be said about the secondary but the talent is there to excel especially early on against a weak first half schedule. If they beat Texas in Dallas there is a very good chance they go undefeated if Bradford is healthy throughout the season.
THE CONTENDERS:
TEXAS LONGHORNS-The Longhorns only return 11 starters and have question marks at quarterback. Can Colt McCoy revert back to his freshman form and avoid the sophomore slump he had last season? Yes. The Real McCoy threw a Matt Ryan-like 18 INT's last year which secured losses against Kansas State and Texas A&M. If McCoy can get his shit together then Mack Brown's team could be due for a surprise rebound season. The offensive line returns 4 starters and the returning wide receivers have game time experience and could excel. They must find a replacement for RB Jamaal Charles with nobody really stepping up in the spring to secure the tailback job. Look for a tailback by committee approach. If the Longhorns want to compete for a Big 12 title they need to get a better pass defense. They finished last season giving up over 300 yards passing in each of the last 5 games including back-to-back 400 plus yard performances by Okie State and Texas Tech. The schedule starts off rather simple with 3 of the first 4 at home against inferior opponents. Yes, Arkansas is not that good right now. But starting with a road trip to Colorado the Longhorns will play three straight tough games with Oklahoma and Missouri also looking to knock them off. Throw in road trips to Texas Tech and Kansas in the second half of the season and this could turn out to be a long season for Mack Brown and company.
TEXAS TECH RED RAIDERS-Head coach Mike Leach has 18 returning starters including QB Graham Harrell and WR Michael Crabtree. The Red Raiders will put a shitload of points on the scoreboard and it will be up to their run defense to stop opponents. If the Red Raiders can stop the run they have a really good shot of competing with Oklahoma for best team in the Big 12 South. Unfortunately they get Oklahoma on the road this year who are looking to avenge last year's loss. I see 10 wins on their schedule and if their experience pays off this could be a magical season for Leach in Lubbock much like it was for Kansas last year.
KANSAS JAYHAWKS-The Fightin Mangino's return after their best season in school history of 12-1 including an Orange Bowl victory over Virginia Tech. QB Todd Reesing is back after a stellar sophomore season in which he earned 2nd team Big 12 honors. The defense will dictate the pace of the game as they return 9 starters including a solid linebacker core. The Jayhawks had a weak schedule last year but won't be afforded the opportunity again with road games at South Florida and Oklahoma as well as a neutral site game against Mizzou in Kansas City. They won't go 12-1 again but there is a good chance they can win 9-10 games and make a New Year's Day bowl.
FALLING BACK TEAMS:
NEBRASKA CORNHUSKERS-Do I think Bo Pelini was the right fit for Nebraska? Nope, I actually thought they should have hired Turner Gil. Nebraska will look to get back to their roots and play some Black Shirts defense but they don't have the talent on that side of the ball right now. I'm a big fan of DE Barry Turner and RB Marlon Lucky as I think both will have excellent seasons for many years to come including the NFL. But other than those two I don't see a lot of impressive talent. The Cornhuskers will struggle in their conference.
OKLAHOMA STATE COWBOYS-I have nothing to say because I don't want to piss off Mike Gundy who apparently is a man who is 40...
TEXAS A&M AGGIES-Their backfield of Stephen McGee, Jorvorskie Lane, and Mike Goodson are one of the best in the nation. The Aggies basically return two total starters on both sets of lines and it is going to hurt them dearly. A lot of teams will be blitzing and running all over them and it could turn into a very long season at College Station. They can make a bowl like last year but don't expect to be a significant one unless you are a big fan of the Penisenvy.com Bowl.
COLORADO BUFFALOES-I really can't wait to see freshman RB Darrell Scott do his thing in Boulder. How Texas let him slip through their fingers is still baffling. Hello Mack Brown, give him some more money for heaven's sake. This is Big 12 football we are talking about. Anyways I don't have the heart or determination to go in depth about the Buffaloes because I honestly could care less about the rest of the team. Just give the ball to Scott and let him do his touchdown dance. I believe head coach Dan Hawkins will realize it quickly. The Buffs open up the season with one of the toughest schedules in the land including non-conference opponents Colorado State, West Virginia, and Florida State before conference play kicks in.
TEAMS THAT SUCK AND BLOW AT THE SAME TIME:
KANSAS STATE WILDCATS-If QB Josh Freeman can lay off the Ho-Ho's and Ian Campbell can sack the opposition every other play then the Wildcats have a chance...maybe.
IOWA STATE CYCLONES-The Cyclones are usually a competitive team but this year they lose 25 of 52 lettermen which will hurt big time.
BAYLOR BEARS-They were winless last year in the Big 12 and were outgained an average of 181 yards a game. Baylor has been horrible for years and is usually a gimme victory for opponents.
BEST GAME: MISSOURI AT TEXAS (October 18th)-Mizzou hasn't won in Austin since 1896. Are you shitting me? This game is huge in so many levels, one being Missouri trying to prove they deserve to be considered for a BCS Championship game.
WORST GAME: KANSAS STATE AT IOWA STATE (November 22nd)-Kansas State owns the Cyclones in Manhattan if you care and I'm sure you don't.
MOST OVERRATED GAME: THE RED RIVER SHOOTOUT (October 11th)-Did you know that last season was the first time since 1997 it was not decided by double digit points. There always seems to be a lot of hype going into it but the game never is close. You can direct your hate mail to wakeup@sportscrack.com.
BEST OFFENSIVE PLAYER: Texas Tech's WR Michael Crabtree is the returning Biletnikoff Winner after setting NCAA freshman records for receptions (134), yards (1962) and TD's (22). The Red Raiders may run a wide open attack but Crabtree is the real deal and will likely be a top 15 draft pick in the NFL next year.
BEST DEFENSIVE PLAYER: Missouri Free Safety William Moore earned 2nd team All-American honors last year after picking off 8 passes and should again be a force in the secondary for the BCS Title hopeful Tigers.
BEST FRESHMAN: Colorado somehow managed to steal the Longhorns prized recruit Darrell Scott from California who should step in the Buffaloes backfield and produce a 1000 yard season at the least if he stays healthy. He was the #1 rated high school runningback and gives coach Dan Hawkins an explosive weapon for intramurals..oh wait, I mean the Big 12 conference. Sorry Hawkins, stop yelling at me brotha.
MOST LIKELY TO GET ARRESTED: It would have been incoming freshman Joshua Jarboe but since coach Bob Stoops kicked him out I am going to have to go with a Longhorn here...LB Sergio Kindle, come on down!
MOST LIKELY TO BE FIRED: Okie State coach Mike Gundy for proving he isn't a man and can't coach.
PLAYER WHO WILL BE BETTER THAN WHAT PEOPLE THINK: Kansas LB Joe Mortensen just makes plays and is one of the most underrated players in the nation.
DOESN'T MAKE SENSE AWARD: The poon in the Big 12 should be so much better. Seriously, I thought Texas was loaded with hot women? Show me the poon Big 12!
THE WINNER IS: I like Missouri to sneak by Oklahoma in the Big 12 title game and have a chance to play for a National Title thanks to a huge season from Chase Daniel and the Mizzou defense.
Georgia Sports Blog is reporting via Street and Smith Sports Business Journal that ESPN has agreed to pay the SEC conference $2.25 BILLION dollars for the next 15 years for exclusive television rights not currently owned by CBS. Essentially it comes out to $15-17 million per year per team in the SEC conference and would bring in more TV revenue to SEC doormats like Vanderbilt and Mississippi State than the big boy national powers like Notre Dame, USC, and Ohio State among others.
All I can say is wow! The SEC conference pulled a major coup by inking a deal with ESPN that will make them the powerhouse of college football. Already dominant on the football field, now the SEC conference will control the amount of press conferences and sports talk you see daily on The World Wide Leader. No longer can one bitch about Notre Dame having it's own television contract when schools such as Ole Miss and Arkansas make more per year on their television contract. ESPN, ESPN2, ESPNU, and hell probably the Ocho will now be dominated with SEC football games every Saturday in the Fall. CBS appears to still have the rights to the best SEC football game of the week at their 3:30 slot and it still isn't clear as to what will happen with ABC since they are owned under the Disney corporate umbrella. Will ABC now have the rights to televise SEC football games? More than likely no but it should get interesting to see what a conference like the PAC-10 now does for their television rights.
"Eyes, eyes, hit him on the rise and get your head out of your ass!" says the gruffy Tenuta. I think I'm falling in love with the grumpy Tenuta who is sure to bring some attitude and blitzing to the Notre Dame defense this year. Sure their defensive line is as paper thin as Keira Knightley but those linebackers and safeties will be enjoying a fall full of hard hits and snot bubbles. Guys like Harrison Smith, Brian Smith, Kerry Neal, and David Bruton will be on search and destroy missions with whomever is carrying the rock this season.
And as Tenuta would say, "It's about fucking time!"
15% OF THE UNIVERSITY OF GEORGIA FOOTBALL TEAM HAS BEEN ARRESTED DURING THE PAST YEAR .
THE JOKES ARE FLOWING ....
A lady in Athens calls 911. Hysterically, she says, 'Someone's just broken into my house, and I think he's going to rob me!'
The police officer says, 'We're really busy at the moment. Just get the guy's jersey number and we'll get back to you.' ________________________________________________________
Q: What is Mark Richt's biggest concern?
A: Does the NCAA count bail money as a recruiting violation? _____________________________________________________
Q: What do you call a drug ring in Athens?
A: A huddle. _____________________________________________________
Q: Four Georgia players are in a car, who's driving?
A: The police. ____________________________________________________
Q: Why can't most of the UGA players get into a huddle on the field?
A: It is a parole violation to associate with known felons. __________________________________________________
The University of Ga team has adopted a new Honor System: 'Yes,your Honor; No, your Honor'. _____________________________________________________
The Dogs are hoping for an undefeated season this year.... 11 Arrests, 0 convictions. ______________________________________________________
Q: How did the Dogs spend the first week of Spring Training?
MATT FAIRCHILD BREAKS DOWN THE BIG TEN AND GIVES HIS PREDICTIONS The Big Ten conference this year is basically Ohio State and a bunch of average to shitty teams. The SEC has beaten the living bag out of the conference for so long it looks like a lot of the elite talent in the Midwest is either going to play for the Buckeyes, going to play for Notre Dame, or going for greener pastures and warmer weather in the South and West. Don't get pissed off at the messenger because it's true. The Big Ten has been toilet paper for a while with the lone exceptions of the Buckeyes and Wolverines. So anyways let's take a look at the conference.
THE ELITE TEAMS:
OHIO STATE BUCKEYES-The Buckeyes return 19 starters and are the overwhelming favorite to win the conference. In my opinion they are so loaded there really is no reason for the other teams in the Big 11 to play them. Most games will be done by halftime and if they aren't it's only because the Buckeyes are not playing their top game. QB Todd Boeckman returns after an impressive junior campaign in which he lead his team to another murderous BCS Title game. Incoming freshman QB Terrelle Pryor looks like a Vince Young clone and should be used the way Florida used Tim Tebow in their National Championship season of 2006. Pryor is 6'6 and runs a 4.35 seconds forty yards so you can only imagine the look of fright opposing linebackers and defensive coordinators will have when Pryor breaks huddle behind center. Beanie Wells is the best runningback in the college game and if he stays healthy he has a good shot at the Heisman Trophy. A lot of people in Columbus think Beanie can eclipse the 2000 rushing yards mark this season and I wouldn't be surprised if he has over a 1000 yards in the first 4 games (Youngstown State, Ohio, and Troy are among the opponents). The two Brians at WR can stretch the field with Robiskie used as the big play threat deep and Hartline used as the short pattern strikes. The offensive line returns 4 starters with Steve Rehring and Alex Boone both capable of having All-American seasons. Incoming freshman RT Mike Adams looks like a future Orlando Pace so people shouldn't worry about him stepping in and the offensive line struggling. The defense of course is the Buckeyes bread and butter led by Butkus Award winning LB James Laurinaitis. The Little Animal comes back for his senior season and teams up with senior Marcus Freeman to form the best linebacker core in the nation. The defensive line and secondary units are elite too and the USC game at the LA Coliseum on September 13 should be the only hiccup in a rather weak Big Ten schedule although road games at Wisconsin and Illinois could be trap games. Coach Jim Tressel will have his team ready to rock this season and I would be absolutely shocked if they lost more than 1 regular season game.
THE CONTENDERS:
WISCONSIN BADGERS-Bret Bielema enters his third season at Wisconsin with 17 returning starters including explosive offensive playmakers PJ Hill and Travis Beckum. The Badgers have strong lines on both sides of the ball and have a chance to compete for the Big Ten title if Beanie Wells, the Little Animal, and about 5 others starters for the Buckeyes go down with injuries. I'm going to be honest here, I really can't remember the last time I watched the Badgers play football. Something about them just doesn't interest me. Sure, they are a cute little team up north but they have never been one of the most exciting teams to watch while you slug beer all day. The Badgers will win 10 games this season while not being a serious threat to play for a National Title but could squeak into a BCS game like Illinois did last year.
ILLINOIS FIGHTIN ILLINI-The Fighting Zooks are back and ready to prove last year was no fluke. QB Juice Williams has been Reggie Ball-like erratic with his passes his first two seasons but if he manages to get rid of the diaper and get the ball to WR Arrelious Benn then the Illini could accomplish many goals this season, one of them making another New Year's Day bowl. Losing RB Rashard Mendenhall is a killer because no matter how much Zook didn't like the kid he was the main reason why they managed to slide into the Rose Bowl last year. Replacing him will not be easy and as of now it looks like Daniel Dufrene will get to toke the rock starting with a huge game against Mizzou in St. Louis on August 30th. The team will play with a huge amount of confidence after beating the Buckeyes in Columbus and their defense could win a lot of games for them. CB Vontae Davis has first round talent and the defensive line is stacked with guys who can penetrate the gaps and create them as well for linebackers such as Martez Wilson. If Juice can continue to progress then this team could be top 15 material. If he struggles then this team will have a hard time winning the close games. I see 8 wins on their schedule.
PENN STATE NITTANY LIONS-Was WR Derrick Williams really the #1 overall prospect in the 2008 class? Talk about not living up to the hype coming out of Maryland Williams was thought of as an explosive playmaker who would change the way JoePa approached the game. Not so much. Williams enters his senior season looking to prove he can be one of the best players in the college game and with fellow WR Deon Butler it should give QB Daryll Clark some decent targets. The defense lost star linebacker Dan Connor to the draft and returning LB Sean Lee to an ACL injury this past spring. Linebacker U won't be the same and it will show. Luckily for the Nittany Lions they return all of their starters on the offensive and defensive lines and it should keep them in a lot of games where their skill positions don't match up to the opposition. Penn State will start 4-0 this season and everybody in the media will be jumping on their bandwagon only to fall off when JoePa goes through a midseason swoon against the likes of Illinois, Wisconsin, and Ohio State.
IOWA HAWKEYES-I'm just going on a hunch here with the Hawkeyes. I keep hearing about how great of a coach Kirk Ferentz is so I guess I'm buying into the hype. They have all five offensive linemen back with QB Jake Christensen coming off a good sophomore season in which he threw 17 TD's and only 6 INT's. The Hawkeyes schedule is rather weak so I could see them winning 9-11 games this year if the breaks fall their way. See, I have fallen for the hype.
MICHIGAN STATE SPARTANS-This team scares the shit out of me. They got a good coach, a good QB, an excellent RB, and a defense that can turn the ball over. They lost a lot of close games last season and were competitive with a chance to win every single game on their schedule. Don't be surprised if they are 7-0 heading into a home game against Ohio State on October 18th. Coach Mark Dantonio has brought back some discipline to a program that slipped under that crazy assbag they had before named John L Smith.
FALLING BACK TEAMS:
MICHIGAN WOLVERINES- The Skunkbears have disaster written all over them this year. Their offense will be a mess with only two returning starters and a new philosophy brought in by DickRod. The good news is the defense should be excellent with 7 starters returning with talent filling in the gaps. The defensive line returns all 4 starters. DickRod missed out on uber recruit Pryor to Ohio State and watched Ryan Mallett transfer to Arkansas and Chad Henne graduate during the offseason. Michigan literally doesn't have shit at QB. They have a transfer from Georgia Tech named Steven Threet who will bring his deer in headlights look up to Ann Arbor. I see 4-6 wins on their schedule.
PURDUE BOILERMAKERS-PurWHO, PurDON'T, PurBLOWS, whatever you want to call them won't compete for anything except mediocrity. Their goal every season is to win 7 games. Joe Tiller is in his last season before he starts auditioning for Quaker Oats spots.
TEAMS THAT SUCK AND BLOW AT THE SAME TIME:
NORTHWESTERN WILDCATS-Northwestern has 15 returning starters from a team that won 6 games last year but still it's Northwestern for Christ's sake.
INDIANA HOOSIERS-DE Greg Middleton and QB Kellen Lewis are studs while the majority of the rest are duds.
MINNESOTA GOPHERS-The Gophers were horrendous last year and while they should be improved this season they still blow.
BEST GAME: OHIO STATE AT USC (September 13th)-I know this isn't a conference battle but this should be the game of the year between two storied programs.
WORST GAME: CAL POLY AT WISCONSIN (November 22nd)-Seriously, who the fuck scheduled this game? Wisconsin has always been so boring to watch and now you throw in Cal Poly and I almost feel asleep trying to type these sentences.
MOST OVERRATED GAME: MICHIGAN AT OHIO STATE (November 22nd)-Only because these two programs will be polar opposites this season. The Buckeyes should absolutely destroy the Wolverines.
BEST OFFENSIVE PLAYER: Beanie Wells comes into this season as one of the favorites to win the Heisman for good reason: the kid can flat out run...
BEST DEFENSIVE PLAYER: Ohio State LB James Laurinaitis is a two time All-American who will be a first round draft pick.
BEST FRESHMAN: Ohio State RT Mike Adams is stepping in as a starter on a stacked offensive line and should establish himself as one of the best in the nation.
MOST LIKELY TO GET ARRESTED: Somebody who wears a Penn State uniform and/or Terrelle Pryor.
MOST LIKELY TO BE FIRED: Joe Tiller for having a Wilfred Brimley mustache. Oh wait, this is his last season before he retires. Good thing because he would probably be fired after Purdue again sucks it up in the second half.
PLAYER WHO WILL BE BETTER THAN WHAT PEOPLE THINK: Indiana QB Kellen Lewis can throw and run with the best of them and might have a Dennis Dixon type of season for the Hoosiers.
DOESN'T MAKE SENSE AWARD: Rich Rodriguez at Michigan. His offense doesn't fit in Ann Arbor and his coaching style will quickly get on the nerves of the Wolverine faithful. It will be entertaining to watch but I can't imagine DickRod lasting more than 5 years in the Maize and Blue.
THE WINNER IS: Ohio State by a landslide. No fucking questions asked. If you want to question it then take a look at the track marks on your arm and begin cleansing yourself with a cold shower.
-Frank Vitovitch of UHND thinks Notre Dame will face a much easier schedule in comparison to last year's brutal slate.
-TheBigLead wonders if Tiki Barber did actually call a colleague a Cunt. Eli Manning nods his head in approval.
-On205th has pictures of Megan Fox fondling her breasts. Can't say I blame her for feeling those sweater puppets.
-GeorgiaSports reveals it's pecking order for SEC coaches and surprisingly they have Coach Richt third behind Les Miles and Urban Meyer. WTF? Les Miles #1. I had no idea he was thought in such reverence amongst his opponents fans.
-Deadspin has a picture of one of the Chinese beach volleyball players playing grab ass with Kerri Walsh after the USA team won the gold.
-BarstoolSports wonders why Michael Phelps would choose to be on the cover of the Corn Flakes box and not Wheaties. I give you three words: money money money.
BUSTED COVERAGE has some new pictures of swimmer Michael Phelps enjoying his college days at the University of Michigan. The one above is of him and Brady Quinn exchanging phone numbers. These two are clearly planning a way to slay all the college poon they can while being famous athletes just out of the college grind of boozing and threesomes.
"Dude, we are going to get so much ass, I'm talking like crazy boy band ass!"
MATT FAIRCHILD BREAKS DOWN THE ACC AND GIVES HIS PREDICTIONS
The ACC has two divisions called the Garbage and Crap divisions. Both smell of pure shit and produce some of the most boring football one can bare to watch on Saturdays. Okay, maybe I am being a little harsh on the Atlantic Coast Conference but when I look back at the last two ACC Championships down in Jacksonville I really have nothing nice to say. The conference has sucked donkey balls. So with that being said here is your preview...
THE ELITE TEAMS:
CLEMSON TIGERS-Tommy Bowden's squad is going to swim or sink on the right arm of senior QB Cullen Harper. Harper had a great year as a junior in which he threw for 27 TD's and only 6 INT's. If he continues to play up to his standards or perhaps excels those numbers of last season then the Tigers could contend for a National Title, albeit a small chance. RB's James Davis and CJ Spiller form the most explosive tailback tandem in the nation and should be counted on this season for over 2500 yards rushing and 20 plus TD's. They are that good and should remind people of the great Cadillac and Ronnie Brown combo at Auburn that should have played for a National Title. The WR's are one of the conference best with Aaron Kelly and Jacoby Ford both having the ability to get behind defenses and make plays in the quick slant patterns. The offensive line is less experienced this season but has the talent to form a wall of protection for Harper and holes for Davis and Spiller to run through. The defense is loaded with experience and talent and look out for freshman DE Da'Quan Bowers. Bowers is a manbeast who enrolled early during the spring and is already being touted as one of the best freshman to play at Clemson. We will get to see if the production lives up to the hype but I expect big things from Bowers. Honestly the defense could be one of the best in the nation with players like Dorell Scott, Ricky Sapp, and Michael Hamlin all possessing the potential to earn All-American accolades this season. Of course one of the keys to Clemson football is the ability to finish off the season. Under Bowden Clemson has had a reputation for starting off really strong and then fading down the second half of the season. If Bowden can get his finger out of his ass and provide the Tigers with some inspired second half football this team could be top 5 material after the regular season in a relatively weak conference. The opening game against Alabama at the Georgia Dome (I will be tailgating at this one) could be their toughest game of the season. After that opening game they don't play a potential top 25 team till the final game against interstate rival South Carolina. But we all know, or last I think I know, Clemson will slip up somewhere against some pathetic team in which they should dominate. Prove me wrong baby Bowden.
THE CONTENDERS:
VIRGINIA TECH HOKIES- Does anyone outside of Hokie alumni actually enjoy watching this team play football? This team is so fucking boring to watch I really don't even enjoy mentioning them as a contender. We all know Frank Beamer's teams play great special teams. Awesome, I get hard just talking about special teams. See what I mean. RB Branden Ore got kicked off the team for being a lazy asshole. I read lazy asshole in the media guide for the Hokies so don't laugh, it's true. QB Sean Glennon is a white senior who can throw the ball and the other QB Tyrod Taylor is a black sophomore who can run the ball. Stereotypes is the name of the game with this team. Their out of conference schedule is garbage with East Carolina, Furman, Western Kentucky, and Nebraska all having the ability to be really bad this season. Throw in a horrible in-conference schedule and this team has the ability to win 9-11 games because all they play is retards. And by retards I mean mentally and physically challenged college football programs. In summation: fuck this team!
FLORIDA STATE SEMINOLES-Bobby Bowden is still alive and slowly destroying the empire he built. I know it's fun to watch as an outsider but you have to feel sorry for the Seminole Nation. Their tomahawks have gone limp. Their offensive line this season is young and inexperienced and could be in for some tough times but their defense should be solid with one of the best secondaries in the nation with the likes of Myron Rolle, Tony Carter, and Patrick Robinson. They have numerous players suspended for the first 3 games for a cheating scandal but they do have 15 starters returning which is the most since their 1999 National Title team. This team, like the past 6 or 7 teams could either be really bad in big games or really good. They have a senior QB in Drew Weatherford and a senior RB in Antone Smith who should provide leadership for which Pappa Bowden clearly has none anymore if ever. FSU will win 8 or more games.
WAKE FOREST DEMON DEACONS-The Deacons have one of the best coaches in the conference as Jim Grobe hopes to lead his team to a third straight winning season. They return 14 starters including QB Riley Skinner who lead the NCAA with a 72.4% completion percentage last season. RB Josh Adams had almost a 1000 yard rushing season and is back to break the defenses back so to speak. The defense basically returns every starter and they play their roles really well. If the Deacons get some breaks they could contend for a conference title despite being way less talented than Clemson. A huge Thursday night game against the Tigers awaits on October 9th which should determine who wins the conference. Don't underestimate Grobes program, they could be top 15 material.
NORTH CAROLINA TARHEELS-Butch Davis program should be one of the most improved teams in the nation. Much like what Ron Zook did at Illinois, Davis has brought in a ton of young football talent to a basketball rich school that could surprise a ton of folks this year. 18 starters return including dynamic offensive playmakers such as RB Greg Little and WR Hakeem Nicks. If they can upset VA Tech on September 20th they have a chance to win their side of the Coastal Division.
FALLING BACK TEAMS:
GEORGIA TECH YELLOW JACKETS- A whole new system comes in as proven college winner Paul Johnson takes over for the boring and uninspired coaching ability of Chan Gailey. RB Jonathan Dwyer will put up huge numbers in the option offense and QB Josh Nesbitt will have some bumps but should get better as the season progresses. The transition could be tough as GT has already suffered some transfers but there is little doubt in my mind Johnson will make GT a winner. Hell, he did at the Naval Academy so there is little reason why he can't make GT a perennial ACC powerhouse.
MARYLAND TERRAPINS-The Terps have a really good coach in Friedgen but just haven't been able to keep in-state recruit studs from leaving the state. Until they can they won't be a serious contender and will still be referred to as the TWERPS.
MIAMI HURRICANES-I just don't think Randy Shannon is the right fit at Miami as a head coach. He is over his head and it will show again this season as the Hurricanes suffer some embarrassing losses. The Canes have the talent to be one of the best teams in the nation but the heart and determination just isn't in the program right now. Complacency is a bitch.
TEAMS THAT SUCK AND BLOW AT THE SAME TIME:
NC STATE WOLFPACK-Sorry Tom O'brien but you return just 10 starters from a horrible team last year with no potential stars in the making.
VIRGINIA CAVALIERS-The Cavs surprised a lot of people last year by winning 5 games by 2 points or less. Luck won't be on their side this season with only 11 returning starters with major holes on both lines and QB.
DUKE BLUE DEVILS-They got themselves a great coach in David Cutcliffe so things can't get worse than 0-24 in ACC play since the conference was split in two divisions. Duke will win 3 or more games this season on coaching alone.
BOSTON COLLEGE-No more Matty Ice means no more wins.
BEST GAME: CLEMSON AT WAKE FOREST (October 9th)-This Thursday night battle on ESPN should be one of the most entertaining games in the ACC and will determine who wins the conference.
WORST GAME: NC STATE AT DUKE (November 8th)-Just thinking of this game being played gives me a bad case of diarrhea.
MOST OVERRATED GAME: FLORIDA STATE AT MIAMI (October 4th)-These games were always boring even when they were good back in the 90's. Yeah, yeah, screw the "Wide Right" snorefests.
BEST OFFENSIVE PLAYER: I'm a big CJ Spiller fan and I think if he stays healthy he is the best offensive player in the conference with a close second to Maryland's Darrius Heyward-Bey.
BEST DEFENSIVE PLAYER: Wake Forest's Alphonso Smith is one of the best pure cover corners in the nation.
BEST FRESHMAN: Clemson's Da'Quan Bowers will have a huge impact on the Tigers defensive line.
MOST LIKELY TO GET ARRESTED: Pick a Florida State Creminole out of a hat and there is a good chance he will have gotten arrested during his 4 years in Tallahassee. Let's just say Bowden runs a loose ship down there.
MOST LIKELY TO BE FIRED: If Clemson doesn't live up to their hype and finishes outside of the top 20 I think Tommy Bowden will get fired.
PLAYER WHO WILL BE BETTER THAN WHAT PEOPLE THINK: Georgia Tech RB Jonathan Dwyer will be a breakout star in Johnson's offense.
DOESN'T MAKE SENSE AWARD: The ACC shouldn't be this bad at football. I know it's traditionally a basketball conference but there is so much talent out there nowadays and the conference actually produces an enormous amount of NFL players that it should be able to compete with the SEC schools.
THE WINNER IS:
I have this feeling Clemson is going to roll over a lot of people this year. I have no empirical evidence since Tommy Bowden's teams are known to choke in the past but I get this feeling their talent will outweigh his ability to fuck it up. Clemson will win the conference and actually be really fun to watch this season while competing for a shot at the BCS Title game.
I really can not wait for football season to get here. The tailgate will start next Thursday as I plan on starting at around 4 PM down in Atlanta for the Paul Johnson regime to debut down in the Flats at Georgia Tech. The liver has been prepped, the wife has been warned, and the soul is ready to let loose on a great 2008 season.
As if dominating and capturing the eyes and hearts of billions of humans across the world wasn't enough with his brilliant 8 gold medal performance in Beijing, Olympic swimmer and Baltimore born and bred Michael Phelps is now ready to own the actual pools kids will be training in order to emulate himself according to the Baltimore Sun...
"My goal is to change the sport of swimming," Phelps told NBC's Nightly News anchor Brian Williams in an interview broadcast last night. "Bob and I are starting up a new business back in Baltimore with the pool that we just bought, so we're going to make some adjustments and see what we can do to take that sport to the next level."
Honestly right now Phelps could sell me anything after his unbelievably clutch performances of the past week and if he wants to take the sport of swimming to the next level I think he will. But let's be completely honest here and state that like Tiger Woods is to golf himself the sport of swimming will never see another Michael Phelps. Tiger sitting out of tournaments while recovering from knee surgery is killing the ratings of golf because people don't want to watch boring pasty white prep yuppies hit the links while scratching their ass and contemplating which Florida property they are going to buy next. They want to see Tiger and the only reason for me and billions of others give a damn about swimming is to see Phelps dominate. He is the face of the sport.
Phelps should instead look to purchase the Baltimore Orioles. I know it sounds like an outlandish idea but the kid is about to make 100's of millions in endorsements wants he gets back to the States. He has now become as much if not perhaps more of a face of a Maryland sports athlete to the young generation as Cal Ripken. By young generation I mean the under 20 crowd. If him and Ripken could pool together enough money with investors they could purchase the Orioles from Peter Angelos. Angelos seems to be on his final leg as owner and his mark as one has not been well received within the state of Maryland. People hate him including myself at times. Angelos isn't a bad man deep down. In fact he gives a lot back to the community in terms of donations. He cares and wants the Orioles to be a winning franchise and since he hired Andy MacPhail to make all the baseball decisions it seems the O's are in the process of getting things turned around with some good young talent waiting in the minors. But if he wants to leave an enduring legacy he needs to sell the franchise to a group of native Marylanders and a combo of Ripken and Phelps would be impossible to beat.
Of course this is all hypothetical as who knows if Phelps would really be interested in owning the Orioles. Right now he is living the dream of winning golds and should be banging everything in sight. Oh wait, that is my dream but you get the point.
Picture HT: My buddy MacG who seems to be so pitted lately via SteadyBurn
I've been busy as shit lately trying to play catch up in the magical rat race of internet sports blogging that I completely forgot to mention my wife got a new IPhone. I know, I know, who gives a shit but the features are really cool in comparison to my old clunker. I got to admit I'm a little jealous she has one while I suffer with this old technology in which AT&T says I'm not due for a cell phone upgrade until July 2009.
Fucking pricks.
Anyways, here is what I have been dealing with the past couple of days with my wife as she bitches about her IPhone features...
If you are wondering why there have been a lack of detailed posts lately it's not because I'm drunk and lazy which I will freely admit to since it is the case most of the time. Nope, it is because I am in Washington D.C. for the past two weeks working at the Legg Mason Tennis Classic. It's a regular paying job that benefits my daily beer habit. I felt I needed to appease you with some of the tennis highlights here...
Nothing like a grown man in a diaper to give a tribute to USC head coach Pete Carroll. Seems fitting and yes, I still hate USC with every single dying bone in my body even though I tend to like Will Ferrell. Fucking Trojans.
Horton's Hob Nailed Boot has received confidential pictures of what is the new UGA for the University of Georgia. The cute pup looks like the real deal and should enjoy one of the most successful reigns for an UGA with the football program well on it's way to national powerhouse under head coach Mark Richt. UGA VII, when hearing of the news knodded his head in approval knowing he won't have to lick his own nuts as many crazed Georgia fans will feel free to do it for him themselves.
On 205th has this great facial shot of a Water Polo Match gone terribly wrong. Don't worry about the young lady, she has a bright future ahead of her with a career in the waiting in Van Nuys, California.
Hungarian weightlifter Janos Baranyai had an unfortunate break in the Olympic weightlifting competition yesterday. Stop crying pussy, Michael Phelps would just swim it off.
Because I sure as shit am. Bring my college football and let me be.
Life begins or ends in 16 days.
For Georgia fans it might have already ended with the bad news of starting left tackle and Matthew Stafford's blind side protector Trinton Sturdivant is lost for the season.
Why don't you go ahead and wipe the sand out of her va....never mind! Sometimes it's good to be the President. Screw foreign policy or that nasty Russia-Georgia battle, our President loves his beach volleyball. It's about priorities people.
So this is why Ryan Braun has missed the past couple of Milwaukee Brewers games with lower back problems. Supermodel Marisa Miller is known to cause whiplash among males ages 1-124 and The Hebrew Hammer apparently fell for her during a recent commercial shot for a Remington razors which is headed straight to YouTube according to JS Online. One can only imagine Braun convincing Miller he needed to get in character by actually sleeping with her in order to make the scene believable. Never mind, the guy is young, makes millions and plays professional baseball. He is literally fishing with dynamite and doesn't need to convince Miller of anything other than she is missing out on the power of The Hebrew Hammer.
Nothing like seeing the good old U-S of A putting those French fuckers back in their place. If your going to talk the talk you better walk the walk and the French swim team couldn't hold on. Michael Phelps gets his second gold medal with six more on the horizon needed to break Spitz's Olympic record.
There wasn't an out recorded on the play but it's hard to argue a better play in baseball this year. Kansas City Royals outfielder Ross Gload reacted with cat like precision in grabbing the ball off the outfield wall as it miraculously dangled and danced down it for what looks like at least 8 feet. The only time I have ever seen a ball dangle from something over a foot was one of my old John Holmes VHS tapes. Damn, those were the good old days. That guy had "talent."
The hunk of hunk of burning love was spotted last night during the rain delay in the Astros-Cubs game doing his best Rick Dempsey impersonation. Not seen in his pockets was a fifth of Jack and enough horse tranquilizers to kill a Vietnamese village.
I'm a day late with this but I figured I might as well acknowledge the passing of Atlanta Braves announcer Skip Carey. Growing up in Atlanta with no cable at the time, Carey and Pete Van Wieren were the voices who resonated baseball during my childhood. Channel 17 was TBS and if you grew up in Atlanta you watched a lot of terrible Braves teams in the 80's. The 90's brought a new era of winning baseball thanks to the presence of GM John Schuerholz and manager Bobby Cox. Skip Carey was there all the way narrating the bad times and the good times. The call above was his greatest and yet I never heard it live. I was at that game with my Dad. It was the pinnacle of the Atlanta Braves history and Carey summed it up best with "Braves Win! Braves Win! Braves Win!" He was as big of a fan of the Braves as we were. He will be missed.
I feel comfortable knowing that Skip is more than likely sharing a bourbon with his legendary dad Harry in heaven.
