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Triumph the Insult Dog Takes Down Young Voters and the Democratic Debates

I gotta say it's been a few years since I've seen any Triumph material.  It's kinda scary to think he started on Conan about 20 years ago.  Fuck getting old sucks.  But watching Triumph tear apart some college coeds never gets old...



And for all the poor people/trustafarian/liberal voters here is Triumph at the Democratic debates.  Don't worry Bernie Sanders was not harmed.

Carolina Panther Thomas Davis Posted a Picture of His Broken Arm

Thomas Davis posted this picture of his fractured arm he played with at Super Bowl 50.#Repost @td58.

This post i… pic.twitter.com/SkqQOYvLJA

— Charles A. Paris (@OverTimeGrind) February 8, 2016

Excuse me while I go throw my guts out into the toilet.  Good lord.  Thomas Davis arm looks like an actual football.  Like I thought that was a Wilson football coming out of the factory.  And he played with a broken arm!  Talk about the ultimate warrior.

The Best SuperBowl 50 Commercial Was This Doritos One

The Super Bowl game for the most part was lame besides seeing Von Miller and Demarcus Ware tear Cam Newton a new one and overall from the commercials I saw this Doritos Ultrasound one was the only one I laughed out loud to.  Doritos are basically crack chips.  And that baby had an addiction so bad it just had to come out.  Love the reaction of the doctor.  I've seen that face many of times before the girl does the walk of shame.

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NFL Bad Lip Reading is Back!

C-C-C-C-Cocaine.  The funniest was part was not having to decipher Cam Newton.  That was straight live mic homes.

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Check Out The Notre Dame Signing Class of 2016 With In-Depth Interviews and Highlights

Ian Book, QB, 3 Star



Tony Jones, RB, 3 Star

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Deon McIntosh, RB, 3 Star



Chase Claypool, WR, 4 Star



Javon McKinley, WR, 4 Star



Kevin Stepherson, WR, 4 Star (Early Enrollee)



Parker Boudreaux, OG, 5 Star

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Liam Eichenberg, OT, 4 Star



Tommy Kraemer, OT, 5 Star



Julian Okwara, DL, 4 Star



Khalid Kareem, DL, 4 Star (Early Enrollee)



Adetokunbo Ogundeji, DL, 3 Star



Daelin Hayes, LB/DE, 5 Star (Early Enrollee)

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Jonathan Jones, MLB, 4 Star



Jamir Jones, LB/DE, 4 Star



DJ Morgan, DB, 4 Star



Spencer Perry, DB, 4 Star (Early Enrollee)



Jalen Elliott, DB, 3 Star



Donte Vaughn, DB, 4 Star



Julian Love, DB, 3 Star



Troy Pride Jr., DB, 4 Star



Devin Studstill, DB, 4 Star (Early Enrollee)



John Shannon, LS, 2 Star

5 Star Safety Deontay Anderson Commits To Ole Miss While Jumping Out of a Plane

I actually enjoy these type of college football commitments rather than the lame hat on the table deal.

5 star safety Deontay Anderson pulled the ultimate signing day thrill by jumping out of a fucking plane and committing to Ole Miss.  Talk about some balls.  And I'm not talking about the skydiving part.  We all know Ole Miss has sanctions coming up from the NCAA.  Enjoy being on a middle of the road at best SEC team.  But at least the check cleared.

Ole Mi$$ Formally Charge By NCAA for Rules Violations

I know what you are thinking.  No way can such an outstanding, well run traditional college football program like Ole Miss be cheating.  It's just unimaginable.  We all knew their top 5 recruiting classes were legit.  I mean the Ole Miss name just sells itself around the nation, perhaps the world.  But brace  yourself for it.  The NCAA thinks they cheated.

Yahoo's Pat Forde broke the story...

The NCAA has formally charged the University of Mississippi with dozens of rules violations in three sports, multiple sources told Yahoo Sports.

The school has received a Notice of Allegations from the NCAA enforcement staff alleging roughly 30 violations in football, women’s basketball and track and field, sources told Yahoo. It is unclear at present what the breakdown is in terms of violations by sport. The NCAA does not comment on current, pending or potential investigations.

Calls to officials at Mississippi were not immediately returned Friday. Southeastern Conference spokesman Herb Vincent declined comment to Yahoo Sports.

I've said it before but Ole Miss doesn't get guys like Laquon Treadwell (Chicago kid) and Laremy Tunsil (Georgia kid committed to Dawgs who last second flipped aka got paid) and Robert Nkemdiche (another Georgia kid who everybody wanted) unless they are breaking the rules.

I've heard first hand accounts of recruits going into hotel rooms on recruiting visits with cash laid out as a gift.  And these were for 3 star players.  I can only imagine how much it cost to get a Treadwell to say no to Michigan and Tunsil to say no to Georgia.  I'm thinking at least 5 figures and more than likely it was in the 6 figures considering Cam Newton was $200k.

So what will happen to head coach Hugh Freeze and his program?  Probably a light spanking.  Maybe some lost scholarships and forfeiture of wins (congrats Bama you can claim more National Titles!) but I don't see the NCAA coming down hard on a SEC program.  And I doubt ESPN presses the issue either.  It is what it is.

2016 NFL MOCK DRAFT

1. Titans - Laremy Tunsil, OT, Ole Miss
2. Browns - Carson Wentz, QB, North Dakota St
3. Chargers - Joey Bosa, DE, Ohio State
4. Cowboys - Jaylon Smith, LB, Notre Dame
5. Jaguars - Jalen Ramsey, S, FSU
6. Ravens - Ronnie Stanley, OT, Notre Dame
7. 49ers - Laquon Treadwell, WR, Ole Miss
8. Dolphins - Shaq Lawson, DE, Clemson
9. Buccaneers - Vernon Hargreaves, CB, Florida
10. Giants - DeForest Buckner, DE, Oregon
11. Bears - Myles Jack, LB, UCLA
12. Saints - MacKensie Alexander, CB, Clemson
13. Eagles - Jared Goff, QB, Cal
14. Raiders - Reggie Ragland, LB, Alabama
15. Rams - Paxton Lynch, QB, Memphis
16. Lions- Robert Nkemdiche, DT, Ole Miss
17. Falcons - Leonard Floyd, LB, Georgia
18. Colts - Ezekiel Elliott, RB, Ohio State
19. Bills - Andrew Billings, DT, Baylor
20. Jets - Connor Cook, QB, Michigan State
21. Redskins - Ashawn Robinson, DT, Alabama
22. Texans - Jarran Reed, DT, Alabama
23. Vikings - Noah Spence, LB, Eastern Kentucky
24. Bengals - Corey Coleman, WR, Baylor
25. Steelers - Eli Apple, CB, Ohio State
26. Seahawks - Taylor Decker, OT, Ohio State
27. Packers - Kenny Clark, DT, UCLA
28. Chiefs - Sheldon Rankins, DT, Louisville
29. Cardinals - Darron Lee, LB, Ohio State
30. Broncos - Jack Conklin, OT, Michigan State
31. Panthers - Kevin Dodd, DE, Clemson

New Johnny Manziel Video of Him Partying With Some Coeds

As we all know by now one Johnny Manziel aka Johnny Football aka Johnny Hangover aka Billy Vegas likes to party with the ladies.  He's like any other red, white and blue blooded American in his early 20's except he has a shit ton of money and plays (or played) QB in the NFL.  I'm not going to sit here on my high horse and shit on the guy because I did the same exact stuff back in my 20's.  Hell I would probably do it now if I wasn't married with kids.  (Hi honey I love you in case you are reading this)  So let's stop pretending this is some outrageous event because Manziel likes to party and have a good time.  And yes I know he went to "rehab" but we all know that was bullshit celebrity/pro athlete rehab.  Those are like party favors for us layman's.

P.S - I'm going to sound like a hypocrite because I am always on my phone but what is the need for people to record video/take pictures of every fucking thing especially when out partying?  All it is evidence that can be used against you.  Put away your fucking camera phones and rock out without recording it.

Double P.S - If you do record a celebrity partying send it to us.  I'll hook you up with a free shirt or some other shit.  I got a business to run here.

Video of Maty Mauk Snorting Cocaine Surfaces, Missouri Suspends Him

Studying with the booger sugar https://t.co/vKElGWctxO

— SportsCrack Apparel (@sportscrack) January 26, 2016

Matty Mauk missing the line, just like he misses his receivers. #Mizzou #Rocktober #MattyIce @TMAFanpage @TMASTL pic.twitter.com/cAUbMqfkT8

— Ray King (@Ray56King) January 26, 2016

First off it's Cocaine 101 you never, ever let somebody film you while doing lines.  Second off you should never miss your cocaine line this bad as now former Mizzou QB Maty Mauk displayed in embarrassing fashion.  Mauk basically did a Carson Palmer in the NFC Championship and completely overthrew his receivers here.  For that alone he should be suspended.  You are a college QB.  Do better.  And by better I mean snort lines with authority like Dan Marino before his draft day.

UPDATE: For what it's worth teammates are saying this video is at least two years old.

The Tom Brady vs Peyton Manning Rivalry Video Will Get You Hyped Up For The AFC Championship

Hard to disagree.  Peyton Manning, as good as he has been his whole career, does not even come close to Tom Brady in terms of greatness.  Peyton is a great statistical QB.  A regular season QB extraordinaire.  But as much as this pains me to say Tom Brady owns Peyton Manning in everything else.  Manning is basically the gimp inside Brady's cellar.  Brady is going for one for the thumb and to put his name up there with Joe Montana as the greatest QB of all-time.  Peyton is just selling Papa Johns pizzas and handing the ball off while relying on a great Broncos defense to win him games while hoping his neck doesn't pop from a stiff Rocky Mountain breeze.

Sunday can't come soon enough.

Notre Dame LB Jaylon Smith Tweets Rehab Has Begun

back at it! 🙏🏾 pic.twitter.com/Yrh5RFkgvE

— Jaylon Smith (@JaeeSmiff9ENT) January 19, 2016

Before his knee surgery Jaylon Smith was a projected top 5-10 NFL draft pick.  Now with his repaired left ACL and MCL in a knee brace there is an outside shot Jaylon drops out of the first round altogether.  But don't feel too bad for Jaylon here.  If he does fall out of the 1st round he will still be able to collect a $5 million insurance policy for not being selected on the first day.  So keep on smiling Jaylon.  If anything Jaylon might get selected late first by a team who can compete for the playoffs right away.

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Check Out Manti Te'o's Girlfriend Jovi Nicole

It looks like the Hawaiian Hitman has been dipping his pineapple into some Instagram strange.

Instagram model Jovi Nicole has 21k followers and Manti Te'o seems to be the most enamored with her as his picture is posted numerous times on her account.

Do Instagram models get paid?  I mean I presume they do what is the going rate?  It just seems weird that these chicks and wanna be models keep posting pics of themselves working out and looking in mirrors.  Don't get me wrong I'm not complaining but if a dude started doing this we would all call him a whackado with a made up girlfriend.

Anywho here are some pictures of Jovi Nicole for research purposes of course...

⚡️50⚡️

A photo posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀🌸ѕnapcнaт:jovιвaвy1 (@joviniicole) on Nov 29, 2015 at 1:26pm PST

Cuz she's my rider👭 @neelabs

A photo posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀🌸ѕnapcнaт:jovιвaвy1 (@joviniicole) on Nov 27, 2015 at 5:15pm PST

💙⚡️🔒

A photo posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀🌸ѕnapcнaт:jovιвaвy1 (@joviniicole) on Nov 1, 2015 at 12:47pm PST

Switch it up

A photo posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀🌸ѕnapcнaт:jovιвaвy1 (@joviniicole) on Sep 12, 2015 at 6:57pm PDT

🌴🍹

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A photo posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀🌸ѕnapcнaт:jovιвaвy1 (@joviniicole) on Jul 11, 2015 at 3:48pm PDT

Duke Basketball Coach Mike Krzyzewski Avoids Congratulating Syracuse, Storms Off Without Shaking Hands

Duke, the defending champions, are in the proverbial shitter right now having lost 3 straight after last night's debacle in Cameron vs Syracuse.  But leave it to Duke and their classy head coach, you know the guy who has the all-time NCAA wins and goes by Coach K, to storm off like a petulant child who didn't get his lolly pop because he didn't get the Duke call at the end of the game.

Sorry Coach K you didn't get your patented Duke flop called at the buzzer from 50 feet from the basket.  Maybe next time you will teach your players how to play stout legal defense without resorting to flopping every time things don't go your way.  And to top it all off Coach K ignores the Syracuse basketball players in the traditional handshake line and goes looking for an official because he thought one of them stole his rat face cheese.

Someone check Coach K's diaper.  His gratitude, grace and sportsmanship are about as real as his hair color.

Jordan Spieth's New Dallas Mansion Looks Decent

You may have heard Jordan Spieth had a pretty good year playing golf last year.  And by good I mean he won a couple of majors including the Masters and collected a cool $53 million in 2015.  

Think about that for a second.  He made over one million a week to play golf.  What a fucking country we live in!  

With his riches Jordan can now splurge on some luxuries such as this $8.5 million dollar mansion to go along with his other measly $2.3 million dollar pad he bought last year.  I think it's obvious the $2.3 mil pad is now strictly designated for his lady friends.  

But let's take a look at what $8.5 million will buy you in Dallas which so happens to be fellow golfer's Hunter Mahan's old house.  That's gotta be a weird conversation knowing Hunter has broken in every room of this house with strange before you could.

The place has a basketball court off the garage.

It's got it's own gym.

Hardwood floors throughout and I'm guessing it's not laminate.

Check out this fucking pool.  That right there sold me.  Who the fuck has an above ground pool this cool?

Nice little fire pit setup right outside the 12 car garage.

A great place to play ping pong while admiring some sports memorabilia.

Now that is what you call a chef's kitchen.  With $53 million I would have at least two chefs on call at all times.

I'm not much of a staircase guy but this one gives me a free flowing boner.

Living room where Jordan will spend 15 minutes maybe all year.

Check Out These Insane Highlights of Notre Dame's Newest Commit Demetris Robertson

#1 Athlete in the nation according to Rivals.com

#1 WR according to 247 Sports.

Demetris Robertson is a consensus 5-star stud across the board.  Robertson more than likely will replace departed standout deep threat junior Will Fuller, who is off to the NFL this season.  

Robertson is a dynamic, elusive play maker who reminds me a lot of high school standouts Reggie Bush, Christian McCaffery and Desean Jackson.  He's a quick twitch athlete who has the ability to score whenever the ball is in his hands.  He also has the size to start right away in college.

The last 5-star receiver Notre Dame got was Michael Floyd and he turned out pretty good.  The last athlete this good to pick ND was Golden Tate and he went on to win the Biletnikoff Trophy as the best receiver in the nation.   Check out Robertson hanging with the one and only Golden Tate during his recruiting visit in early September.

Go Irish 🍀🍀🍀 pic.twitter.com/ILRDaF8moH

— RealRobertson5 (@d_rob4) September 4, 2015

Getting a player of Robertson's ilk is a major coup for Brian Kelly and his staff especially when pulling him out of the state of Georgia while battling the likes of Alabama and Georgia for his signature.

In Honor of the Rams Returning To Los Angeles Here is the Classic Chris Everett - Jim Rome Fight

The Fearsome Foursome, Jack Youngblood, Eric Dickerson, Jerome Bettis, Henry Ellard and yes even Chris Everett can now smile since the Rams are finally returning to their home in Los Angeles.  For 20 years the Rams franchise languished in dirty old St. Louis, a baseball town, only to be saved yesterday thanks to an awesome NFL commissioner in Roger Goodell and a people person in owner Stan Kroenke.  Kroenke and Goodell are modern day Robin Hoods.  They steal from the rich only to give it to the poor.  Why else would anybody leave St. Louis for Los Angeles?

My Way Too Early Preseason Top 10 for 2016

1. Clemson - Basically their entire offense is back including preseason Heisman favorite Deshaun Watson.  The defense loses some key cogs but they got a ton of depth waiting to plug and play.  Dabo will have them foaming at the mouth next year.

2. Alabama - It doesn't matter who they lose on the field or on the sidelines because the defending champions will have Nick Saban at the helm.  Until Saban is retired you have to put Bama in your top 4 every season.

3. Stanford - Christian McCaffery is back and should put up Heisman numbers.  David Shaw has proven he can win big games and Stanford has a ton of young talent ready to step in and play.

4. Ohio State - The Buckeyes are probably losing the most elite guys including their two best in Bosa and Zeke but JT Barrett is back and you know Urban Meyer will  have them competing for another title.

5. Notre Dame - If ND can get over the injury bug they should explode next year.  The offense will be unstoppable with either Kizer or Zaire behind center.  But who replaces Jaylon Smith?

6. FSU - The Seminoles are a good QB away from being a playoff team.  It could be freshman Malik Henry next season.  If he can hand it to Dalvin Cook and let him do his thing then FSU is a legit playoff contender.

7. LSU - Leonard Fournette is back.  That's all you need to know.  Also they are loaded with talent.  Sure Les Miles isn't the greatest coach in the world but I got a feeling LSU wins the SEC West next season.

8. Oklahoma - Can Baker Mayfield lead the Sooners over out of conference opponents Houston and Ohio State next year?  If he can then the Sooners are back into the playoffs.

9. Oregon - I think the Ducks rebound from a "bad season" and battle Stanford for the PAC 12 Title.

10. Michigan - The Wolverines are going to be scary good with Jim Harbaugh getting more of his players in there.  I would not be shocked at all to see them go undefeated into the Big Ten title game.