ROB LOWE GOES NUTS

Rob Lowe Goes Nuts from Rob Lowe

Looks funny but I will probably not watch "Parks and Recreation." Why? Because I'm fucking lazy and I'd rather drink and masturbate on Thursdays. Duh!

SCARY SNOW PENISES ROCK SMALL TOWN

BROOKLYN DECKER IS FUN TO LOOK AT

I'm still not going to pay $12 to go see her in the newest Adam Sandler bomb of a movie but I don't mind looking at these new Esquire pictures of her. It's only a matter of time before Brooklyn Decker ditches the tennis geek she's with now and upgrades to the blogger geek. Don't worry Brooklyn...I'll keep it our dirty little secret you vixen you.

Images via WWTDD

NOTRE DAME LOSES 5 STAR RECRUIT STEPHON TUITT TO GEORGIA TECH

Well as quickly as the Irish gained a recruit in Chase Hounshell they lost their biggest recruit today when 5 star defensive end Stephon Tuitt called Brian Kelly and told him and his staff he would be staying local and head to Georgia Tech.

Georgia Tech, led by recruiting coordinator Andy McCollum, pulled off the biggest last-minute switch in Yellow Jacket recruiting history on Tuesday afternoon.

McCollum has been working newly minted five-star defensive end Stephon Tuitt for years, and all that hard work finally has paid off.

Tuitt called Notre Dame head coach Brian Kelly and decommitted from the Irish. He has committed to Georgia Tech and head coach Paul Johnson. Monroe Area head coach Matt Fligg confirmed the switch.

"We talked a lot the last two or three days, and I told Stephon he needed to do what was best for him. The big hold up was he didn't want to be known as a decommitter," Fligg said. "This afternoon we called Notre Dame together and let them know that he is no longer committed there. Then we called head coach Paul Johnson and informed him Stephon would be a Yellow Jacket."

Tuitt was worked over into flipping to Georgia Tech thanks to high school teammate Demontevious Smith who just recently received his first major offer this past week from none other than Georgia Tech. Smith convinced Tuitt that staying local would be in his best interest and that playing in Al Groh's defense would suit him well. Tuitt is the most highly regarded prospect to commit to Georgia Tech in the past 30 years. He is the #1 prospect in the state of Georgia and also is rated the #2 defensive end in all the country.

Groh's defense last year was horrific so expect Tuitt to start right away. Pretty much as soon as he steps foot on campus he will be their best player. Props go to coach Paul Johnson and his staff for getting his high school buddy to get him to switch. All is fair in love and recruiting.

NOTRE DAME STEALS ONE FROM FLORIDA, LANDS CHASE HOUNSHELL

Talk about a reversal of fortune for two programs. Back when Charlie Weis was coaching Notre Dame Urban Meyer would routinely steal recruits from the Fighting Irish at the last minute (Justin Trattou, Omar Hunter). It was a matter of routine for Urban to tear out the hearts of Notre Dame recruiting fans and eat it. You pretty much expected it.

Moving along to the present we now have Notre Dame stealing Florida recruits. Massive offensive tackle Chase Hounshell had been committed to the Gators for over 6 months but all it took was an in-home visit from head coach Brian Kelly and position coach Ed Warinner just a day after Will Muschamp and his Gator crew visited to get the kid to flip. In other words Kelly and his staff are just straight up stealing house money at this point.

If you are a Gator fan you should be worried about Muschamp and Weis coaching your team. Neither one of them has proven themselves as a head coach and it appears recruits are starting to take notice too. Meanwhile Kelly and his staff continue to get top notch prospects and convince them to either flip to them or stay committed. It's probably because Kelly is a proven winner who no matter what kind of talent he had on his roster he would continue to win. If you are a Notre Dame fan you shouldn't be on the fence anymore with Kelly as the coach. He knows what he is doing. If you are Gator fan I would be really worried.

Karma is a bitch.

PEE WEE HERMAN IS A BAD DRUNK

I know you are but what am I?

CAL RIPKEN JR TO BE BALTIMORE ORIOLES OWNER IN TWO YEARS?

Since football season is pretty much over for me I figured I would dive into some baseball rumors. Former ESPN sports commentator and journalist Roy Firestone (yes...the guy who made Rod Tidwell cry) is a die hard Baltimore Orioles fan and had this juicy rumor of Cal Ripken Jr. taking ownership in two years from Peter Angelos...

Im not identifying the person. But at an awards dinner I presented last night honoring Tom Seaver, Brooks Robinson, Joe Garagiola, Bob Uecker, and others, I had a lengthy conversation with a highly"plugged in" individual(NOT AN ORIOLE OR EX ORIOLE).This person(whom any baseball fan would know) told me that Peter Angelos intends to sell the Orioles in two years to a group headed by Cal Ripken Jr. I have NO CONFIRMATION nor do I have any personal insight. I don't even know if Cal would even dignify the comment with an answer. All I know is that this person(not a scribe either) is highly credible and had alot of details. I've heard this suggestion before, and many have talked about this. But this is the first time Ive heard a baseball figure tell me that this is going to happen. Just thought youd like to know.

Firestone posted this on OriolesHangout.com and for the love of God I hope it happens. Since Peter Angelos bought majority ownership of the Baltimore Orioles back in 1993 for $173 million the team has made only 2 playoff appearances. The once proud franchise who relied on great starting pitching, good defense, and the three-run homer have become the laughingstock of the AL East under the grips of Angelos. Sports Illustrated has rated him the worst owner in all of the Majors. As an Orioles fan I would completely agree. Camden Yards has become a ghost town under his ownership despite it being one of the best ballparks in the game. People don't go to the games anymore because they don't want to support the franchise mainly because of the way Angelos has run them into the ground. Angelos is public enemy #1 in Baltimore.

Ripken on the other hand is a state treasure. He's an icon. A legend. A local boy who won a World Series and kept the Orioles on the map despite Angelos. He would be the perfect owner for the only team he has ever known. He grew up playing "the Oriole Way" under his dad who was a long time coach for his hometown team. Ripken knows baseball and with him being an owner it would put his face back on the franchise and destroy the totalitarian drowning grip of Angelos' dead hands.

It almost sounds too good to be true. One can only pray the information Firestone got is in fact correct. It's something myself, Eddie, Cal, and the rest of the Orioles fanbase and franchise could drink to forever.

RICKY GERVAIS NAILS HOLLYWOOD RAW WITH HIS GOLDEN GLOBES OPENING MONOLOGUE

I got to admit I'm not a huge Ricky Gervais fan but I thought he did an excellent job last night hosting the Golden Globes. He made all of Hollywood uneasy right with his first heater of a pitch high and uptight with Charlie Sheen's face planted on it. Then he moved on to make fun of Scientology, Hugh Hefner, Mel Gibson, Lost, The Tourist, Hollywood Foreign Press, Tim Allen, Sex and the City, and many others. You could just feel the tension in the room. It was great to see how uneasy a bunch of uptight liberal millionaires can get by a Brit telling jokes.

And as far as the dress category goes since I know you guys are all about fashion I have to go with a straight up tie between January Jones and Halle Berry.





I believe Halle Berry is 41 and she is still batting cleanup. And she just had a kid. She is basically tearing the fuck out of Hollywood despite being twice the age of most actresses. Good for her I say. Note to the other actresses if you want me to recognize you in the best dress category you have to show off some fucking cleavage. Anne Hathaway is naked in about every movie she appears in yet she was covered from neck to toes. WTF Hathaway? You are better than that. Now go throw up and get naked on camera.

BART SCOTT WAS A LITTLE EMOTIONAL

Haha..."they can't stop a nosebleed" is classic Bart Scott. I'm not going to lie, I was heavily rooting for the Jets yesterday. I never root for a New Jersey/New York based team but I couldn't help myself yesterday. If the Falcons were going to embarrass themselves the night before I sure as hell wanted the Patriots to lose so all the talk wouldn't be about how the Falcons shit the bed. The Jets made Tom Brady look very average. Jets now advance to face the Steelers in the AFC Championship. I know the refs like to personally gift playoff games to the Steelers with their bullshit calls but I'm siding with the Jets this weekend. I like Rex Ryan and I honestly can't stand the Steelers.

BEARS FANS ARE DAMN SEXY

If you are in to overweight, middle age men than the Chicago Bears have the perfect fans for you. Team them up with the Packers crew this Sunday and you got the billion pound march on the horizon. MLK would be so proud.

Via TheBigLead via Jimmy Traina

NFL PLAYOFF PREDICTIONS

BALTIMORE VS PITTSBURGH

Ray Rice is the X factor in this game. If he goes over 80 yards rushing the Ravens will win easily. On the other hand the Ravens need Joe Flacco to play within himself and not turnover the ball especially with the fumbles. I know this game is in Pittsburgh and Rapelisberger is pretty much money against the Ravens but I don't think the Steelers play their best game today.

Prediction: Ravens 24 Steelers 20

GREEN BAY VS ATLANTA

I love the fact that all the experts out there think the Packers are going to go into Atlanta and win. Somehow the Falcons have become "underdogs" at home despite Matt Ryan and head coach Mike Smith having an over .900 win percentage at the Georgia Dome. The Falcons win this game easily thanks to their defense.

Prediction: Falcons 28 Packers 20

OLD GOLFERS VS YOUNG PUNKS WITH REMOTE CONTROL CAR: WHO YOU TAKING?

I was just waiting for one of the old men to pull out a knife and gut one of these punks. It's because I play golf and have respect for the game (drink a beer a hole at all times) that I would have been perfectly fine if one of these old men killed and claimed self defense. I got your back Caddyshack!

HT: Extra Mustard

BLAZIN' BALLS LOOK DELICIOUS

Nothing says good eating like Blazin' Balls! My mouth is literally watering just thinking about some hot balls. I would lick, bite and swallow so quickly. I need Blazin' Balls in my mouth now damnit!

HT: Extra Mustard

NICK FAIRLEY AND CAM NEWTON BOTH DECLARE FOR THE NFL, IS EITHER #1 PICK MATERIAL?

Yesterday National Champion Auburn lost their two biggest playmakers in quarterback Cam Newton and defensive tackle Nick Fairley to the NFL draft. Are either one of these freaks of nature #1 pick material for the Carolina Panthers?

I'm going to say no. Carolina does need a quarterback if they plan on ditching the Jimmy Clausen experiment but I don't think Cam would be the best choice. Andrew Luck would have been the perfect pick for Carolina but since he is coming back for his senior season at Stanford there is no sure bet for #1. Newton has too many question marks (character, ability to adapt to a pro-style offense, experience) to risk handing your franchise over to a guy who would instantly become the face of the franchise. I think Cam could become an excellent NFL QB with time but I don't think Carolina would be conducive to his development. Plus you know Cam and his father are going to hold out for the most money.

Fairley was a beast this season and pretty much carried Auburn's defense much like Cam carried Auburn's offense. He was unstoppable in college. The only person who stopped him was himself. Yes, Fairley does take a lot of plays off. The motor isn't constantly ticking like it is in a Ndamukong Suh. If I'm going to throw tens of millions on a #1 overall pick I have to be absolutely sure they will give it everything they have on Sundays. I'm not convinced Fairley has it in him. Don't get me wrong the guy is a fucking locomotive when he gets going and I would be more than happy to have him playing for my Falcons. But if I'm Carolina I can't risk missing on this #1 pick with a guy who takes plays off and who will be getting millions of dollars and could just cash out like Albert Haynesworth did when he got his big paycheck.

So who would I take #1 if I were Carolina? I would probably look to trade down and get a second round pick to go along with a first or even another first round pick if possible but if I had a gun to my head and had to pick one guy right now it would be Clemson defensive end Da'Quan Bowers. The sky is the limit it for Bowers and with the close proximity of Clemson to Charlotte he would be in a comfort zone with the franchise. I can see Bowers developing into another Julius Peppers.

ISHAQ WILLIAMS TO NOTRE DAME!

Notre Dame picked up another huge commitment with 4 star outside linebacker Ishaq Williams dad confirming to IrishIllustrated.com's Pete Sampson that his son would be attending Notre Dame starting next week. This is another huge get for the Notre Dame football program in that Ishaq would join potential 5 star players in defensive ends Stephon Tuitt and Aaron Lynch in what would be the best defensive haul in Notre Dame recruiting history. Notre Dame now has 22 commitments for their 2011 signing class and are still awaiting word from running backs Amir Carlisle and Savon Huggins who both have ND as a finalist in their college decision.

If you are curious to know how good of a recruiters head coach Brian Kelly and defensive coordinator Bob Diaco are you should read this story told to Pete Sampson.

OK, here's the backstory. The dad told me that Ishaq was ready to announce his commitment last weekend at the Army Bowl, or at least was very close to it, but the commitment was going to be to Penn State. During the week Ishaq prayed about the decision, coming to terms with two big points, that Notre Dame was the best fit for him off the field and that the Penn State coaching situation wasn't going to be stable enough for him to trust that the staff would be there intact during his college career.

Fast forward to this morning, with Bob Diaco making a 4:30 a.m. in-home visit with the family, which is what ended up getting Notre Dame over the top.

“The whole notion of going to a school because of a position coach, that’s not a good look,” Shaun Williams said. “Everything else at Notre Dame just added up. It’s really just what he was looking for. He really admires coach Diaco and really admires coach (Brian) Kelly. Coach Kelly is a proven winner and might just prove to be the next Joe Paterno, if he wants to coach that long.

“The whole idea of how confidently coach Diaco talks about Notre Dame winning a national championship in the next few years, he just felt he had to buy in.”

I've already bought in to Coach Kelly and Diaco after seeing Notre Dame run off a 4 game winning streak at the end of the season with a true freshman quarterback starting and injuries to 5 key starters who were missing. It's great to hear recruits are taking notice and that Notre Dame is on the right track. The thought of Ishaq, Lynch, and Tuitt all in the same class is sickening. Notre Dame is usually lucky to land one of these defensive recruits of their caliber every 5-10 years. Three in one class? Mind blowing.

Here are some highlights of Ishaq...

BLAKE GRIFFIN WITH A LITTLE DOUBLE PUMP DUNK RIGHT IN THE HEART OF THE MIAMI HEAT

I got a new favorite NBA baller and his name is Blake Griffin. The LA Clippers power forward rookie got in the face of Miami Heats' Mario Chalmers and basically told him to fuck off. Then he gave the royal finish to the Heat last night with a double pump slam dunk that sealed a win 111-105 victory. Just another 24 points, 14 boards, and 6 assists night for Griffin. I'm telling you this kid is going to be the face of the NBA. Everybody wants to jump on Lebron and Kobe's nuts and eventually pass the torch to Derrick Rose but Griffin is the real deal. The kid will eventually turn around the worst franchise in sports history. Book it!

TERRELL SUGGS' MIDDLE FINGER SALUTE SHIRT TO PITTSBURGH

Baltimore Raven's outside linebacker Terrell Suggs wants you to know how he feels about Pittsburgh. The Ravens and Steelers obviously don't take a liking to one another. They are already calling Saturday's playoff game Armageddon because which ever team is left standing after they knock the piss out of each other will more than likely lose the next week versus the Pats/Jets winner. It's going to be brutally bloody battle. The Ravens are the dogs on the road which is to be expected. I think Suggs gets his wish on Saturday and gives Pittsburgh a knockout punch. Right in there Rapelisbergers.

Early Prediction: Ravens 24 Steelers 20

LES MILES USED MICHIGAN FOR LEVERAGE WITH LSU

Just a day after turning down Michigan for their head coaching position Les Miles returned to LSU and announced an extension with the Bayou Bengals. How fucking awesome is that? He used the school he played for to get a contract extension with his current employer. Poor Michigan.

BATON ROUGE, La. -- LSU and Les Miles have agreed in principle to a new contract that will run through the 2017 season.

LSU athletic director Joe Alleva says Miles' annual pay of a little more than $3.75 million will remain the same.

Now I know Michigan is saying they never offered Jim Harbaugh or Les Miles the job and Brady Hoke was their first choice but we all know they are fucking dirty liars up there in Ann Arbor. Harbaugh was never going to go back to Michigan with the NFL throwing cash around like Pacman in a strip club. But Miles just flat out used Michigan to get more money out of LSU. He used Ann Arbor like she was some dirty whore. I doubt Miles even left any change on the nightstand after he was done. Come to think of it...

JUSTIN BLACKMON AND BRANDON WEEDEN RETURNING TO OKLAHOMA STATE

The Oklahoma State Cowboys football program received some great news today when record-breaking All-American junior wide receiver Justin Blackmon will return along with quarterback Brandon Weeden. Blackmon was projected as a sure-fire first round draft pick after setting Okie State records with 111 catches for 1782 yards and 20 touchdowns. Weeden also set Cowboy records his junior season with 4277 yards passing along with 34 TD's.

While I'm not surprised Weeden is returning since most draft experts don't have him pegged for as a first round pick I'm shocked Blackmon decided to come back. Blackmon was projected to go right behind UGA's A.J. Green and possibly before Alabama's Julio Jones in the first round. With Blackmon returning the Cowboys have a legitimate shot of competing with the Sooners for the Big 12 Championship next year along with defending his Biletnikoff Award versus Michael Floyd.

Here is my list of the top 5 returning players in college football next season off the top of my head. All 5 of these guys have a good shot at competing for the Heisman if they can get their respective programs to a BCS Bowl game and of course compete for a National Title.

1) Andrew Luck (Stanford)-Be ready to be barraged with endless stories on Luck. He's a good guy who deserves the recognition it's just unfortunate that a lot of people will start to hate him because of all the preseason attention.
2) Justin Blackmon (Oklahoma State)-Could he put up even better numbers? Wouldn't shock me.
3) Lamichael James (Oregon)-Should have the Ducks competing for the PAC-10 Title.
4) Kellen Moore (Boise State)-The guy just wins and will probably throw for a bijillion yards vs. Georgia on national television.
5) Manti Te'o (Notre Dame)-The Hawaiian Hitman will have his coming out party in 2011.

MICHAEL FLOYD WILL RETURN TO NOTRE DAME FOR HIS SENIOR SEASON

Notre Dame just picked up the biggest commitment they could for the 2011 season. Standout Wide Receiver Michael Floyd announced he would be coming back for his senior season.

"This was one of the toughest decisions I have ever had to make in my life," Floyd said. "On the one hand, there was Notre Dame. This place has been an incredible home to me and the relationships I built here are ones I know I'll have for the rest of my life. On the other hand, there was the NFL. It has always been a lifelong goal to play football at the highest level and that is something I look forward to doing at some point. However, I'm pleased to say I will be returning to the University of Notre Dame for my senior season in 2011.

"I'm returning to Notre Dame for three reasons: to earn my degree, return Notre Dame to the top and improve myself as a player. First, I promised my mom I would graduate from Notre Dame and I am 40 credit hours shy of attaining that goal. I chose to attend Notre Dame in part because I knew it was a 40-year decision and not a four-year decision. Graduating from Notre Dame will help me for the rest of my life. Second, I want to get Notre Dame back to a BCS game. I believe we are very close to returning the Irish to where we belong and I want to be part of something great. Lastly, I want to show everyone in the country that I'm the best wide receiver in college football in 2011. There are many things I need to improve, but I feel with the coaching I have at Notre Dame, I can become the best at my position in this game."

Michael Floyd

As I've already mentioned before this is huge for Notre Dame and Floyd himself. Notre Dame has a legitimate shot at a BCS Bowl game next year with Floyd back. Floyd also has an outstanding shot of improving his draft stock and entering the 2012 NFL Draft with a much weaker group of wide receiver class entering. This is a huge win for the Notre Dame football program and it's basically better than landing a 5 star recruit. Floyd is a beast of a football player and will have a huge senior season in 2011.