AGAINST ALL ODDS I'M TAKING OHIO STATE TO COVER THE -3.5

I know all of my bowl picks have been right on the money and I've probably made you more than the winning Mega Millions ticket tonight but you got to trust me on this one: Ohio State will not only beat a SEC team in a bowl game but cover the spread. Stop laughing. I'm being dead serious.

Look Arkansas is not that great of a team. Sure they are out of the SEC and from everything we have seen in the past the SEC completely dominates and embarrasses the Big Ten when it comes to football. SEC > Big Ten. We know this. What we don't know is how good Arkansas really is especially when it comes to a BCS Bowl game. They have never played in one and the Buckeyes play in one every year because of the shitty Big Ten conference. Maybe I'm over thinking it but I don't think Arkansas can hang with Ohio State. If Arkansas had Andrew Luck or Cam Newton I would take them straight up. But instead they got Ryan Mallett. A Michigan transfer. Yep. Michigan never beats Ohio State and Mallett won't be the first.

Prediction: Ohio State 31 Arkansas 20

TYROD TAYLOR PULLS TECMO BOWL MOVE

This was basically the one highlight for the Hokies last night. In a close game at halftime (Stanford led 13-12) was quickly turned into a blowout as Andrew Luck went off and the Stanford defense led by Shane Skov shut down Tyrod Taylor. Stanford crushed 40-12 and now Luck and head coach Jim Harbaugh can ride into the NFL sunset.

So let the rumors begin for Harbaugh.

Carolina in a package deal with Luck who have the #1 pick?

Stay in the Bay Area and coach the 49ers?

Go to Denver to help Stanford grad John Elway revitalize the once proud Broncos franchise?

Or maybe just stay in Miami the site of the Orange Bowl to coach the Dolphins?

We should find out within the next 3 days.

RICH RODRIGUEZ IS OUT AT MICHIGAN, BRADY HOKE TO BE NAMED HEAD COACH ON FRIDAY

I will have more on this later but it appears the University of Michigan has called for a 2pm press conference today to announce the firing of Rich Rodriguez. It has been as plain as day from the beginning that DickRod was never going to work in Ann Arbor. It appears the 52-14 bowl shellacking was the final straw.

Current San Diego State Brady Hoke will be the new head coach. Hoke is a "Michigan Man" and I believe will do an excellent job at Michigan. If you can make the Aztecs and Ball State winners there is little doubt he can succeed in the Big Ten. In case you were wondering Stanford head coach and former Wolverine QB Jim Harbaugh was their #1 candidate but he is going to the NFL along with Andrew Luck.

END OF THE SEASON SPECIAL: NOTRE DAME GAME DAY FOOTBALLS FOR $80

The regular retail price on these official Wilson Notre Dame Game Model Authentic f1003 GST footballs are $199. I usually sell them for half that price but now that the season is over I'm selling them for even lower: $80. I got 5 left in stock so order quickly before they are gone.

LIBERTY BOWL PUNCH-OUT!!!

Not all was glorious for the SEC so far in the bowls. In what was easily the most boring and predictable game so far, Central Florida won their first bowl game ever by knocking out Georgia with a left cross. Georgia fans immediately rationalized the loss by calling for offensive coordinator's Mike Bobo's head.

Don't worry Georgia fans. There are brighter days ahead. It's only about 240 more days till you get to play Boise State in the Georgia Dome. Oh fuck. Nevermind.

ESPN'S HANNAH STORM AND ADAM SCHEFTER HIGH FIVING OVER ERIC MANGINI GETTING CANNED BY THE CLEVELAND BROWNS

You gotta love the professionalism that ESPN displayed here over Eric Mangini getting fired. They obviously didn't think they were on air because they quickly changed their mood from pure joy to seriousness. Schefter even checks his phone in the "oh shit there goes a contact within the Brown's organization."

TERRELLE PRYOR AND KIRK HERBSTREIT SOUND LIKE JILTED EX-LOVERS

As if the Big Ten wasn't a big enough disgrace after New Year's Day (Michigan and Michigan State got absolutely smoked, Wisconsin losing to TCU in the Rose Bowl, Penn State looking slow and old versus Florida) now we have the she said/she said battle of barbs from Ohio State QB Terrelle Pryor and former Buckeye and current ESPN College Football commentator Kirk Herbstreit.

Herbie was upfront about his thoughts on Pryor. He doesn't think he is a leader and has shown poor judgement ever since he stepped foot in Columbus. He basically said losing Pryor would be "addition by subtraction." Of course the Buckeyes won't be losing Pryor for the Sugar Bowl because they would get embarrassed on National TV versus another SEC team in Arkansas. They still might get embarrassed.

Pryor was asked about what he thought of the comments made by Herbie.

"I don't worry about what Kirk Herbstreit says, to be honest with you."

After a pause, he added, "Has he beat Michigan?"

Zing! Yes Herbie went 0-4-1 vs. Michigan and Pryor is undefeated vs. Michigan. But Michigan didn't have RichRod as their coach in the late 80's. In fact they were a competent powerhouse so to speak. Now they just get blown out 52-14 in bowl games to the likes of Mississippi State.

Listen I have no dog in this battle of words. But both of these guys are obviously embarrassed by their words. They need to just confront each other and hug it out like all Buckeyes do.

BLAKE GRIFFIN WITH JUST ANOTHER HO-HUM DUNK

While watching the Hawks win yesterday over the Clippers (great weekend for an Atlanta fan's perspective: Thrashers win 2, Falcons clinch home field) I couldn't help but be impressed by power forward Blake Griffin. This kid would be the face of the NBA if he didn't play for the Clippers. Every night he has a highlight reel dunk. Every single night. In just his first season after coming back from a broken kneecap that wiped away his whole rookie season the young Griffin is averaging 21.7 points and 12.5 rebounds. He still needs to work on his free throw shooting and he has the ability to hit from beyond the arc but once he gets it down we might be arguing about Blake Griffin as the best NBA player instead of the usual Lebron-Kobe-Dwight talk.

CHARLIE WEIS BRINGING HIS DECIDED SCHEMATIC ADVANTAGE TO FLORIDA. WAIT A SECOND. SERIOUSLY?

Taking a cue from the Trojan's department on "how to demolish an elite football program" it appears the University of Florida has decided to not only go with a first time head coach in Will Muschamp (Ron Zook worked out well the first time) but now they have hired the ultimate arrogant asshole in Charlie Weis. No worries Gator fans since along with his healthy appetite and perfect SAT score he brings his "decided schematic advantage." So SEC fans and foes you better get your laughs in now because Weis will have the Gators offense rolling with fade passes into the endzone in no time.

Here is what the Gators get with Charlie Weis:

1) A target for ridicule
2) Charlie Weis Jr. (apparently this is the reason why Sr. took the job, to help get his son into Florida and coaching, sounds like BS)
3) John Brantley will now emerge from his season of god awful shittiness and be a Heisman contender who gets sucker punched in bars. Mel Kiper will also tell us Brantley is the second coming of Tom Brady only to see the guy fall flat on his face on Draft Day.
4) Piccadily and Ryan's Steakhouse stock just went up two fold in Gainesville.
5) An offense that besides 2007 when it reached the depths of unholy hell will be scoring at least 30 points a game.
6) No drive sustaining running game of any kind.

Listen I'm probably one of the few people who actually liked Charlie Weis. Sure he is not a joy to look at and his bull shit bravado talk can get unnerving especially when Notre Dame was getting smacked around by the likes of Syracuse and Navy but I always felt he tried his hardest to succeed while he was the head coach. The same couldn't be said for Davie and Willingham. The big guy will be the first one to the office and the last to leave. He will give everything he can to Florida in order for them to get blown out in a bowl game. I feel the same way I did three years ago when Michigan hired Rich Rodriguez. It just doesn't fit. Weis and Florida are polar opposites. The man is going to need an air conditioned golf cart just to survive Gainesville.

No worries though Florida football players. With Weis you also get a packaged extra helping of Bruce Springstein and Jon Bon Jovi blaring over your PA system as you practice every single day. Because it's all about you the kids and not what the big guy likes to jerk off to.

When I first heard the news "Weis to Florida" all I could do is shake my head and wonder why he would take a demotion and leave the NFL once again. Now all I can do is laugh. Florida is stuck with him. Awesome.

THE SUN BOWL AKA SNOW BOWL TODAY PREDICTION

Picture courtesy of Matt Cashore

Here is the weather report from IrishIllustrated.com's Pete Sampson...

Up in the pressbox at the Sun Bowl looking down on a snow-covered field, which is being "cleared" by a golf cart pulling some kind of plow. Other officials are clearly the yard lines by dragging their field the width of the field to show every 10-yard mark. Notre Dame officials have taken matters into their own hands on the sidelines, scraping away snow with folding chairs, card tables and rakes. I spy one shovel in the whole crew.

By halftime the field should be cleared off. Ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous.

That's right folks, we got some snow in El Paso. Clearly Notre Dame decided to bring the arctic blast with them in order to freeze out the tropical Miami Cocanes. According to Vegas Da U is a 3 point favorite. They have no head coach and their quarterback blows and they will be playing in the snow against a hot Notre Dame team. Yeah. You know who I'm fucking taking here.

The Catholics will be bringing a steady dose of Cierre Wood and Robert Hughes all game and try to shove it down the Canes throats. Notre Dame's defense will be relentless and cause at least 3 picks from Jacory Harris. Miami will dig themselves to big of a hole to get out of and the Irish will cruise despite a late scare.


Prediction: Catholics 21 Convicts 17

Go Irish!!!

EVERETT GOLSON'S SENIOR FILM IS OUTSTANDING

I can't wait for this kid to be competing in South Bend this spring.

Elusive runner: Check.

Rocket arm: Check.

Throwing accuracy: Check.

Proven winner: Check.

Everett Golson brings back memories of Charlie Ward ripping it up down in Semenhole Country. He's 6 foot at best but the way he moves around the pocket and keeps his head down field even when under pressure is reminiscent to Ward when he was winning a Heisman. Golson will be the perfect fit for Brian Kelly's spread offense. He's extremely accurate and quick with his decisions. I'm not going to go out on a limb and say he starts next season as a true freshman but I do believe one of the other quarterbacks (sophomores Tommy Rees, Andrew Hendrix, and Luke Massa) will transfer due to Golson jumping ahead of them.

TIME TO RISE UP AND CLINCH THE HOME FIELD FOR THE FALCONS

No more posts after this one. I'm already wrapped in four layers of clothing getting ready to head down to the Dome to see the Falcons beat the shit out of the Saints. The tailgating gear is packed. The beer is cold. I won't be able to feel anything since it's in the 20's down here in "Hot"lanta but I could care less. It's time for the Atlanta Falcons and Matty Ice to clinch home field for the eventual NFC Champions Atlanta Falcons. You got that right folks. The Falcons will be going to Dallas in early February and yes we are going to fuck up Tom Brady. Mark it down. Put it in stone.

Falcons Fever Bitches!


Image courtesy of AJC.com

INGA FROM SWEDEN SAYS MERRY CHRISTMAS (AND NEEDS A SPANK)

I wanted to send everyone out with a Merry Christmas and since you are naughty I might as well give you a spanking.

The talking banana in this video brought tears of laughter. This might be the greatest Christmas song of all-time by the way.

Bucknuts Busted...

Five Ohio State players will sit out the first five games of next season and one additional player will sit out the first game of next season, all for receiving improper benefits as far back as 2009. One of these players is Ohio State QB Terrell Pryor who was recently quoted on Twitter as saying "I paid for my tattoos. GoBucks". I have tattoos and a job that pays well and I couldn't afford the work Pryor has. He paid for tatts and I'm running for president. In the words of Dr. Gregory House, "IDIOT!".

What I don't quite get is how these players, who have been found to have been receiving improper benefits for 2 years are punished for 5 games. Why have the victories not been forfeited? How are these guys playing in the bowl game? Looks like the NCAA plays favorites. I don't give a crap if all of these guys play, plus their 2011 recruits. I can't wait to watch Arkansas blow out yet another over rated Ohio State team. They probably shouldn't play and save themselves another embarrassing SEC loss then complain they didn't have their entire team.

Check out the full story here as reported by ESPN.com and the Associate Press

COLUMBUS, Ohio -- Five Ohio State football players, including quarterback Terrelle Pryor, must sit out the first five games of the 2011 season for accepting improper benefits, the NCAA ruled Thursday.

A sixth football player must sit out the first game in 2011 for receiving discounted services in violation of NCAA rules.

All of the players be eligible for the Jan. 4 Allstate Sugar Bowl, however.

Five players were found to have sold awards, gifts and university apparel, plus receive improper benefits in 2009. In addition to missing five games next season, Pryor, Mike Adams, Daniel Herron, Devier Posey and Solomon Thomas must repay money and benefits ranging in value from $1,000 to $2,500. The repayments must be made to a charity.

Jordan Whiting must sit out the first game next year and pay $150 to a charity for the value of services that were discounted because of his status as a student-athlete.

The NCAA announced the suspensions on Thursday, shortly before Ohio State athletic director Gene Smith and coach Jim Tressel were to meet with reporters to discuss the university's investigation of players trading autographs for tattoos.

Adams must repay $1,000 for selling his 2008 Big Ten championship ring and Herron must repay $1,150 for selling his football jersey, pants and shoes for $1,000 and receiving discounted services worth $150.

Posey must repay $1,250 for selling his 2008 Big Ten championship ring for $1,200 and receiving discounted services worth $50, while Pryor must repay $2,500 for selling his 2008 Big Ten championship ring, a 2009 Fiesta Bowl sportsmanship award and his 2008 Gold Pants, a gift from the university.

Solomon must repay $1,505 for selling his 2008 Big Ten championship ring for $1,000, his 2008 Gold Pants for $350 and receiving discounted services worth $155.

"These are significant penalties based on findings and information provided by the university," Kevin Lennon, NCAA vice president of academic and membership affairs, said in a statement released by the NCAA.

The players are eligibile for the bowl game because the NCAA determined they did not receive adequate rules education during the time period the violations occurred, Lennon said.

"We were not as explicit with our student-athlete education as we should have been in the 2007-08 and 2008-09 academic years regarding the sale of apparel, awards and gifts issued by the athletics department," Ohio State athletic director Gene Smith said in a statement. "We began to significantly improve our education in November of 2009 to address these issues. After going through this experience, we will further enhance our education for all our student-athletes as we move forward."

REX RYAN DOESN'T DENY THE FOOT FETISH VIDEO

You know I never thought I would see the day where boisterous Rex Ryan was just be flat out embarrassed. Now I just feel bad for the guy. But then again if it was such a private issue then why is he and the wifey making videos and posting them on the internet? The New York Media is going to eat this guy alive starting with the feet.

TAKE BOISE STATE TO COVER TONIGHT

Besides the hiccup against Nevada in which their kicker pulled a Finkle Boise State has been straight up crushing teams. They get to vent off some frustration tonight in the Las Vegas Bowl vs. Utah. Kellen Moore is going to be throwing bombs all game and I don't think this game will even be close. Utah maybe a top 20 team but Boise is really a top 4 team.

Take Boise State to cover the 16 and go make some god damn foot fetish snuff films.

Prediction: Boise State 48 Utah 17

"LET'S GO EAT A GOD DAMN FOOT" FETISH REX RYAN VIDEO

This is a video of Rex Ryan's wife, Michelle, showing off her feet while Rex narrates and apparently gets off on the sight of his wife's feet. Out of all the fetishes I never understood the foot thing. Feet are nasty. Give me some boobs, ass, lips, and legs and I can understand the fascination. But feet? Gross.

Get your shit straightened out Rex. Or go get a god damn snack. Stop being a jackass.

LINGERIE FOOTBALL BENCH CLEARING BRAWL

If that douchebag Geno whatever the fuck his name is who coaches women's basketball at UCONN wants the media and the world to actually care about their stupid winning streak maybe they should take a cue card from the Lingerie Football League. Actually never mind. I don't even watch Ultimate Fighting because there is too much ball grabbing and random nut shots. I could only imagine what it would be like with women's basketball. It's been a while since I've made myself vomit but I think I just broke the streak with the thought. Fuck.

Dan Connolly... my hero

Who says lineman can't run?!?!? Mr. Connolly, I love you, you're my hero. Check out the video on YouTube.

Greinke to the.... Brewers?!?!

MLB Photo

What's up sports fans? I hope all of you are having a great holiday season. I bet none of you are having happier holidays than a Mr. Carl Crawford, Mr. Jason Werth, or Mr. Cliff Lee, that is unless you are Frank Wren or Doug Melvin. Of course the headlines will be full of the new $100 million men, but what about the genius trades by Wren and Melvin this off season?

AP Photo/John Bazemore

Let's start with Wren. Everyone in Atlanta has given Wren the WTF face at one point or another. Let's be honest, who would've thought picking up Troy Glaus and Eric Hinske would send the Braves to their first post season in 4 years? Wren also picked up a serviceable Melky Cabrera and lefty reliever Mike Dunn for Javier Vasquez who did what with the Yankees? Granted, Wren also engineered the Rick Ankiel and Kyle Farnsworth deals, but who can blame the guy for taking a chance? To follow up last year's off season, Wren must have felt the Marlins got a directive from Santa Claus himself by practically giving away Dan Uggla, one of the most offensively talented second base in history. The Braves will miss Omar Infante, but the buy low sell high model was nothing but sheer genius. The Braves lost Dunn (see above) and Infante, a career utility infielder, to shore up the one thing the Braves have been missing since the glory days of Andruw Jones, a clean up hitter. Martin Prado was more than willing to move to left and will eventually take over for Chipper Jones when Chipper soon becomes the hitting coach of the Braves (just a personal prediction). What's amazing about the trade is that the Braves essentially will, according to rumors, get Uggla for 5 years at around $60 million, which is the same yearly salary the Marlins were offering, and did not give up a single one of their top 25 prospects to pick up a 30 HR, 80 RBI guy who has more than excelled at Turner Field. To those who are criticizing signing Uggla long term, take a look at his numbers, only Albert Pujols has hit more home runs in the last five years and are first all time for a middle infielder in his first five season, ahead of Ernie Banks by 18 HRs. If the Marlins are ready to give away Hanley Ramirez, I'm sure the Braves will be more than willing to send Brooks Conrad and Christian Martinez or Peter Moylan to the Marlins. Good luck to you Mr. Jeffrey Loria. I can't wait to see Uggla put a stake in the Marlins' hearts in 2011.

AP Photo

Doug Melvin also deserves a genius label for his latest deal. The guy goes out and gets Shaun Marcum, a legitimate #2 pitcher, and then trades a few prospects for a true ace to compliment the young and impressive Yovanni Gallardo. If the Brewers had a strong catcher, they'd be straight out scary. With Ricky Weeks, Prince Fielder, Ryan Braun, Corey Hart, the emergence of Casey McGeHee, and Carolos Gomez, the Brewers are a preseason contender. Of course the Brewers gave up a talented but unproven Lorenzo Cain and a potential future phenom that is Jeremy Jeffress, but the Brewers also improved by adding Yuniesky Betancourt and sending Alcides Escobar to the Royals in the deal. The only positive spin for the Royals is that Dayton Moore proved to be a great asset in Atlanta and has taken the Braves' model of building a world class farm system with talent behind talent behind talent to ensure that the future is bright, but losing Greinke and signing Melky Cabrera and Jeff Francouer aren't exactly moves that get you recognized as GM of the year. For Mr. Moore, I hope I eat my words, but at least he won't have to face Greinke in the near future like Loria will face Uggla in Florida.

What other moves have been surprising this off season?