Jim Tressel continues to dot the i in LIAR

I was on vacation last week when the whole "Jim Tressel lied about not knowing his 5 players committed infractions" story broke. I honestly didn't think too much of it. I just figured the Sweatervest has lied about a lot of things since he came to Columbus. It's not necessarily his fault. It's part of the game. Literally there are so many fucking NCAA rules that if an athlete takes a shit without contacting Tressel on whether he wiped his ass 2 or...wait for it...3 times then the NCAA could see it as a violation.

Listen I don't like Ohio State. But I hate the NCAA even more. If a player wants to sell his own jersey for money then let them. If a player wants to exchange their own jersey for tattoo's then let them. It's their own fucking property as soon as Ohio State gives it to them. I thought the A.J. Green suspension was bull shit and I think the 5 players for Ohio State being suspended is bull shit. It's a dumb ass rule and the only reason it is around is because the NCAA doesn't want anybody profiting off anything college related unless they have their dirty fingers in it. They are the biggest hypocrites in the world. A college athlete can't sell his image or likeness for money while playing yet the schools and the NCAA can profit off those players by putting them on billboards, commercials, and jerseys. And yeah I get it that they get a free education, food, clothes and room and board but some schools are literally making 100's of millions off certain athletes. Everybody knows Cam Newton was worth the 180K to Auburn. The guy brought in millions to Auburn.

But anyways enough of the NCAA rant. Tressel has now upped his suspension to 5 games instead of the 2 he initially was suspended for. Here is what he said today...

"Throughout this entire situation, my players and I have committed ourselves to facing our mistakes and growing from them; we can only successfully do this together," he said in a statement. "I spoke with athletic director [Gene] Smith, and our student-athletes involved, and told them that my mistakes need to share the same game sanctions."

First off he is lying. Bold face. The "players and I have committed ourselves to facing our mistakes and growing from them" is complete and utter bull shit. Tressel knew the players committed an infraction and hid it from the University's compliance department and the NCAA. That isn't facing your mistake throughout the entire situation. That is running and hiding from it. So Tressel is about as trustworthy as Lane Kiffin is right now. He knows he broke the rules but as long as he didn't get caught he would still be coaching. In other words he is not a very good leader or example right now for the Ohio State football program. His track record with wins and losses is fantastic and you can't discount the winning attitude he has brought to Columbus since leaving Youngstown State. The Buckeyes struggled for national prominence and couldn't even beat arch rival Michigan before Tressel arrived. Now they dominate the Big Ten and destroy Michigan every single year and compete in BCS Bowl games because of Tressel. But like Dez Bryant faced when he lied to the NCAA I believe Tressel should be suspended for the whole season if the NCAA is going to follow their protocol. If a student-athlete lies about knowing something the NCAA hammers them. They should do the same with the coaches in my opinion.

In the big picture this whole story is more of a witch hunt for Tressel's head. Tressel knew about the infractions back in April of 2010 when he was notified by Columbus lawyer of the 5 player's infractions for the tattoo's in exchange for jerseys. He didn't notify anybody because all 5 of those players are major parts of his program. Suspending them last season would probably have meant the Buckeyes wouldn't have been in the Sugar Bowl. So he hoped it went away. It didn't. The player's infraction isn't even bad in my opinion. Tressel lying about it the whole time and trying to avoid the subject is worst than what the players did. And for this Tressel should be suspended for the whole season if the NCAA wants to "uphold it's integrity*" of the game.

*=corporate sponsors

House of Pain - Shamrocks and Shenanigans

It wouldn't be St. Patrick's Day without a little House of Pain blast from the past.

HT: Jake



Image via Ebaums World

The Greatest Charlie Sheen Shirt Yet: Winner Winner Sheen Dinner

All you warlocks out there better get your hands on this Winner Winner Sheen Dinner shirt today! It's just another SportsCrack original t-shirt that others will surely rip off. Get your shirt today! Tiger Blood not included.

WINNER WINNER SHEEN DINNER SHIRT

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

It wouldn't be St. Paddy's without the Leprechaun in Mobile video. This video still brings tears to these Irish eyes. It's a classic that just keeps on giving. St. Patrick would be proud of the crackhead.

I hope everybody has a Happy St. Paddy's Day!

The new Adidas commercial has Notre Dame in it...not Michigan

Sorry Michigan. You couldn't cut it for the newest Adidas commercial. I think I saw a quick glance of a Wolverines helmet in there. Unfortunately it was when Notre Dame tight end Kyle Rudolph was reaching for the goal line and Michigan defenders were dropping like flies. Sucks to be a Wolverine.

Snoop Dogg killed it and The Situation bombed at the Roast of Donald Trump

It wasn't the same without Greg Giraldo there but the Roast of Donald Trump had some knockdown laugh out loud moments. One of the best was Snoop Dogg just straight out killing it. Who knew Snoop could be so fucking funny? Snoop's Jeffrey Ross jokes were hysterical. It was great to see him tear up The Situation. I know a lot of people love The Jersey Shore but I personally think it is one of the worst shows ever. It's not even remotely funny. It's just a bunch of talentless redneck guidos doing laundry. Great concept.

Here is the Situation trying to act funny and in the process his 15 minutes just ran out.

R.I.P NATE DOGG

The smooth and soulful Nate Dogg passed away yesterday at the age of 41. Regulators was his major hit back in the mid 90's and it was one of those tunes you couldn't get out of your head. The flow and melody to the song was G-Funk like. Just listening to it now makes me want to roll a fatty, kick back and reflect on life.

R.I.P Nate Dogg

Tonight's Basketball Picks

UAB +5 over Clemson
I know Clemson comes from a power conference in the ACC but did you actually watch it this year? It was terrible with the exception of Duke and North Carolina. Going 9-7 in the ACC conference is like UCONN in football going 6-4 in the Big East. It's no big deal. The UAB Blazers on the other hand have heard all about how they don't deserve a spot in the tournament and how Virginia Tech or some other loser team should have gotten in over them. The winner of this 12 seed vs 12 seed game gets West Virginia on Thursday. Take UAB with the points as the dog and if you are feeling really lucky take them with the outright win and the odds pay 3-to-1.

Prediction: UAB 66 Clemson 64

Milwaukee Bucks vs Atlanta Hawks -5
The Bucks are garbage and the Hawks for the most part kick ass at home. Atlanta hasn't been playing it's greatest ball of late but they can handle the Bucks. This game won't be close. Al Horford and Joe Johnson are going to destroy the Bucks.

Prediction: Hawks 98 Bucks 85

Albert Pujols panty shot

TheBigLead via JoeSportsFan got this Ryan Franklin tweet picture of some singer named David Nail and oh my god Albert Fucking Pujols is wearing women panties in the background. I can see the lace off his balls. Pujols is our modern day Nuke Laloosh.

Great March Madness Moments in Legos

Tauntr.com had this rather brilliant recreation of March Madness moments lego-lized. I watched the "Fab 5" documentary on ESPN last night and seeing Chris Webber call the time out still makes me laugh. The guy would talk so much shit to opponents but when he failed he would just cower and not answer questions. Personally I had no problem with the Fab 5 even though they were a Michigan team. I generally liked Jalen Rose because he had a swagger and I thought the Fab 5 was great for college basketball. It's just too bad Chris Webber fucked it all up for them on the court with the idiotic timeout and off by taking money (over $250,000) and still won't answer questions or apologize for what he did. For a big man C-Webb looked like a little bitch the way he came off in the documentary. Maybe in 2013 when he is reinstated by the NCAA he will man up and admit he fucked up.

Tommy Zbikowski moves to 2-0 with 1st Round TKO

This obviously wasn't as impressive as his first professional fight 4 years ago but Baltimore Raven's safety Tommy Zbikowski still delivered a powerful left hand hook to tomato can Richard Ryant's upper chest for the first round TKO. With the NFL Lockout in full force Zibby will have a chance to fight again in less than a month. The venue will be in Atlantic City.

"As long as he is available to fight, we plan to keep him very busy, whether it's once a month, every two or three weeks," said promoter Bob Arum, a corruptible weasel who acknowledged during a 2000 federal trial that he bribed the International Boxing Federation (IBF) to attain a higher ranking for one of his scrappers.

"Our matchmakers feel he can compete at the top level in boxing as a cruiserweight, and we're going to keep him busy.”

Zibby seems up for the challenge.

"I wanted to get the ring rust off in this fight," he said. "Right now this isn't a second career for me. It's a first career."

Sorry for my absence

As you can see I'm excited to be back. Now give me your cuppy cakes!

Bring on the NCAA Tourney and Gus Johnson

Just hearing CBS Play-by-play announcer Gus Johnson scream "COLD BLOODED" gets me all tingly and hard. It's that time of the year again folks. NCAA March fucking Madness. Yesterday they announced the brackets and looking at them at first glance I don't really see anybody who got hosed. The Tourney is going to be wide open. Some of the favorites (please be Duke!) will get knocked out early and you know there will be at least a couple of Cinderella's who make it to the Elite Eight. Bring it on!

Charlie Sheen knocks one out of Dodger Stadium. Winning.

The Tiger Blood is dripping strong here with Charlie Sheen knocking this shit out of ball at Dodger Stadium. Check out that textbook left handed swing. Wild Thing can play a little ball. Winning.

NOW THIS IS A HOCKEY FIGHT: JUDD BLACKWATER VS JIM JORGENSEN

You might call the second punch a sucker punch considering Jim Jorgensen was already going down but I think Judd Blackwater was doing what needed to be done: finish the fight. The announcers made this fight even more exciting. Anytime you can throw in a Charlie Sheen reference you will be put on this blog. Winning.

Video via ExtraMustard

FOR THE HELL OF IT: STACY KEIBLER

It's always good to see an old classmate of mine making it big other than myself. Granted Stacy and I didn't talk too much during our mass communications courses at Towson University. She was a cheerleader for the Baltimore Ravens who was actually pretty smart who didn't need to cheat off this genius. Granted I'm no genius who would much rather party than study back then and hell..to this day. Anyways Stacy managed to go on without me and become a Wrestling Diva and Dancing with The Stars contestant. Now you can check her out in this Esquire spread.


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How's that Brandon Davies suspension working for you BYU?

So much for BYU getting a #1 seed and making a run for the Final Four which would have been huge for all the Jimmer Fredette and BYU fans out there. BYU got crushed in Provo last night by New Mexico of all teams 82-64. This was their first game without starting center Brandon Davies who was dismissed from the team because he had premarital sex. For now Davies is still allowed in school while his case is being reviewed by the Gestapo. Sorry I meant the Honor Code Office at BYU.

The lesson here kids is to never go to BYU to play sports unless you hate sex and want to be a virgin throughout college. Or you can get married and have kids during college which will work out just as well for you when you are 30 years old and regretting the decision to be Mormon. Don't worry I'm not anti-Mormon. I'm anti-religion when it comes to punishing kids for something they shouldn't feel guilty about.

Tommy Zbikowski returning to pro boxing, fights March 12th

It looks like an old familiar friend of the SportsCrack is getting back into the ring. Baltimore Ravens safety Tommy Zbikowski is scheduled to return to the pro boxing ring on March 12 in Las Vegas at the MGM Grand as one of the undercard fights headlined by the main event of Miguel Cotto vs. Ricardo Mayorga.

Tommy Z has fought professionally once before in 2006 when he was a junior safety for Notre Dame. He knocked out some chump named Robert Bell in the first round at the Madison Square Garden. If you don't recall the fight here it is with most of his Notre Dame football teammates in attendance...


Before Tommy Z fights he needs to get his Nevada State license on March 8th. This shouldn't be a problem since he has fought professionally before and has 90 amateur boxing matches (75-15 record). This actually makes a lot of sense for Tommy Z with the impending NFL Lockout set to start in 15 hours. Zibby is a restricted free agent for the Ravens who isn't under contract so he has the freedom to fight and not void his NFL contract.

Personally I can't wait to see Tommy Z fight again. An opponent hasn't been named yet but you figure it has to be someone decent especially if it's the undercard to the Mayorga/Cotto fight. He is fighting as a cruiserweight after previously fighting as a heavyweight back in 2006. A cruiserweight is just under 200 lbs. The fight is a four-round bout. I hadn't even planned on ordering the fight but now with Tommy Z fighting you can pretty much assume it will be on my TV. If you are a Notre Dame fan or Tommy Z fan this should be pretty exciting. I wonder if he comes out in green shorts with a shamrock for Notre Dame or he comes out in something purple for the Ravens?

Tommy Z turn to pro boxing via ProFootballTalk

Charlie Sheen is winning with his 1927 Yankees Championship ring

The only watch that keeps Warlock time - Class of 1927 ring "Bambino U"

If you aren't following Charlie Sheen and his "winning tigerblood" on Twitter than you need to follow him immediately. It's fucking gold. It's magic. It's highly entertaining. And yes that is a 1927 New York Yankees World Series Championship Ring. Winning.

Here is a twitpic with one of his goddesses, Bree Olson, the porn star who is living with him. Winning.

BYU loses starting center Brandon Davies because he had sex..WTF?

Yeah I know BYU has some bull shit honor code where you can't fuck on campus or smoke a cigarette or whatever but did they seriously just suspend starting center Brandon Davies from the Cougars during a dream season? Holy shit those Mormons actually did it!

SALT LAKE CITY -- BYU officials confirmed Wednesday that starting forward Brandon Davies wasn't involved in anything criminal that resulted in his dismissal from the team.

BYU is in the midst of a dream season. But Brandon Davies' dismissal over the school's honor code is a nightmare for the Cougars, writes Eamonn Brennan. Blog

University spokeswoman Carri Jenkins said an honor code review is under way to determine if the BYU sophomore will be allowed to remain in school, as well as his status with the team next season.

BYU's honor code requires students to live a chaste and virtuous life, be honest, abstain from alcoholic beverages, tobacco, tea, coffee and substance abuse, and attend church regularly.

The school announced the dismissal on Tuesday night after being made aware of the violation Monday -- the same day that BYU (27-2, 13-1 Mountain West) vaulted to No. 3 in the ESPN/USA Today and AP polls.

Davies had started 26 of 29 games and averaged 11.1 points and a team-leading 6.2 rebounds.

God damn it I hate when religion gets in the way of my gambling! Seriously though I hate this kind of shit. The kid is in college. He is an athlete. He wants to have sex. Let him. You know what happens when you tell adults they can't have sex? Well besides marriage they start rebelling and start killing people. Davies is a very important piece of the BYU basketball team and right now they are looking like a legit #1 seed. The fucked up thing about it is if Davies was married to like 5 chicks and banging them all this wouldn't be an issue. He would probably get a statue put right next to Brigham Young. Instead he had a sip of beer and fucked some broad like normal college kids do, didn't commit a crime by any means yet he is off the team and quite possible kicked out of school.

It's just not right. Free Davies!

The next great defensive end recruit is just a freshman in high school. Meet Lorenzo Carter

He is only a freshman in high school down in Atlanta, GA but Mays defensive end Lorenzo Carter will most definitely be getting texts and phone calls from the Mark Richts and Nick Sabans of the recruiting world very soon. If not already. I know he isn't even old enough to drive but Carter looks like a senior in these highlights. Mays High School plays in AAAA so they face some pretty good competition and he isn't exactly playing against teams from the Northeast. Georgia high school football is right up there with producing elite NFL talent aka SEC talent. By the time Carter is eligible to sign in 2014 I'm sure Urban Meyer up at Ohio State will be fawning all over him.

If you are a recruiting junkie like myself you can only imagine how Carter will fill out and progress into the next Jadeveon Clowney or Da'Quan Bowers. I'm calling it early. Carter will be the #1 prospect in 2014.

EPIC WEDNESDAY SONG SELECTION: BULLS ON PARADE

Bulls on Parade brings back fond memories of high school spring break down in Panama City. Rage Against the Machine and Sublime were constantly on the shuffle mode in the cd player back then. Definitely an epic song. Enjoy.

Notre Dame picks up first commitment for 2012 class in CB Tee Shepard

If you follow Notre Dame recruiting you know there has been a major concern in terms of numbers in the defensive backfield after the 2011 season. With the losses of senior cornerbacks Gary Gray and Robert Blanton not to mention safety Harrison Smith after this coming up season the Fighting Irish will be extremely low in depth and talent in the defensive backfield.

Enter the commitment today of Fresno, CA cornerback Tee Shepard.

Shepard is the first commitment for the Fighting Irish's 2012 class. He is a 6'1, 175 lb elite cornerback who has offers from Alabama, Auburn, Miami, and USC among many others. In fact he might be the best cornerback in the 2012 class and his commitment is huge for Notre Dame.

Shepard has a chance to start right away during his freshman season. He is the quintessential shutdown corner who would be right up there with Manti Te'o, Aaron Lynch, Ishaq Williams, and Stephon Tuitt in terms of elite high school talent. Shepard also has the ability to return quicks and is extremely fast and agile. If Notre Dame fans want to compare him to somebody recently in college football think of LSU's Patrick Peterson. Shepard has the same ability.

As with all verbal commitments they are non-binding which means Notre Dame is just in the proverbial lead right now for Shepard. With 11 months left till signing day you can bet Lane Kiffin and Nick Saban won't stop pursuing a player with Shepard's ability till the ink is dry. Either way it's a great start for Notre Dame's 2012 class.

Here are some highlights of Shepard from the steady hand of Michael J. Fox....

Luis Moreno is the Michael Vick of Colombian Soccer

As you can see Colombian soccer player Luis Moreno likes to kick defenseless animals. In a way he was just paying respect to Michael Vick. Except Vick would have electrocuted and killed the owl if it wasn't a good fighter. I guess what I'm saying is Moreno is an asshole but not any bigger than Vick. Vick's a-hole is the Chernobyl of all a-holes.

Moreno like Vick could be facing jail time up to 3 months for kicking the owl which later died today.

Video via TheBigLead

Zach Enyeart Trick Shot Long Snapper

You have already seen the trick shot videos of Johnny Mac and Alex Tanney and while they were damn impressive long snapper Zach Enyeart may have them beat. Enyeart just graduated from Washington State and is eligible for the NFL Draft. With his video ending ball shot I would most certainly draft a guy with his skills. Who doesn't like a ball shot?

Is the Cam Newton Story about to explode again?

I'm already kind of sick and tired of mentioning this story but apparently we might be getting ready for a second dose of Cam juice. And yes it tastes disgusting. There are new allegations about to come out revolving around Cam Newton actually being present during a taped audio conversation in which money was discussed for the supposedly "play-for-pay" Heisman Trophy winner. The audio tape apparently involves Cecil Newton and former Mississippi State players John Bond and Bill Bell with Cam in the room. The NationalFootballPost.com has more to the story...

The host of a Huntsville, Ala., sports talk radio show says he has heard audio tapes, allegedly in the possession of former Mississippi State players John Bond and Bill Bell, that implicate the dual-threat signal-caller in his father, Cecil’s, pay-for-play scheme that was investigated by the NCAA.

Scott Moore, an Alabama fan and a college football speaker, said Friday during a radio interview with WNSP in Mobile, Ala., that he heard tapes of Cecil Newton selling his son's services to Mississippi State while Cam was in the room. Moore also claimed that Cecil Newton said he had received an offer from Tennessee for $200,000, but that he’d give Mississippi State a $20,000 discount.

According to Barrett Sallee of CollegeFootballNews.com, however, Moore contradicted himself regarding the amount supposedly offered by Tennessee. In an interview on Mississippi-based 1st Call with Matt Wyatt one day before the interview in Mobile, Moore stated that Tennessee offered $150,000 for Newton’s services and not $200,000.

Of course, Auburn and Tennessee are the Crimson Tide's two biggest rivals and both are implicated in Moore’s claim.

Now it looks like Tennessee might have been involved and honestly who wouldn't be surprised especially if Lane Kiffin was still the coach. Or it could all be BS created by Cecil to drive up Cam's price. It's all conjecture at this point and until I see an actual money trail going from point A (Auburn or someone affiliated with the program) to point B (Cam or Cecil) then there is nothing the NCAA can do about it. Maybe rules were broken and maybe they weren't. At this point I want proof and not rumors. If someone took $200K there should be someone who is in the know who is willing to sell their story to make a lot of money. Until then we just have bitter Mississippi State and Alabama fans grasping at straws to discredit Cam Newton and Auburn. All is fair in love and college football.

Epic Beer Chug

God I miss the German beer gardens. Fucker just chugged a liter of Spaten in less than 6 seconds. Count it. 6 fucking seconds. Unbelievable. I consider myself a pretty decent beer drinker and I can fully admit there is no way I could chug a hearty Spaten that quickly. I think this kid might be my hero. Sorry Charlie Sheen. You got competition.

Just another Blake Griffin Alley-oop Dunk

These Blake Griffin dunks are starting to get old. It's like he doesn't even try anymore. They just come so damn easy for him. Despite Griffin's 27 points and 12 boards the Clippers lost to the horrible Sacramento Kings. I guess that isn't saying much since the Clippers are a horrific 21-40 now.

Hottie Body Hump Club

I gotta hand it to Jimmy Kimmel. He got Scarlett Johansson, Minka Kelly, Jessica Biel, Jessica Alba, Eva Longoria, and Sofia Vergara to hump the shit out of an exercise ball. Bravo Jimmy. The Humpilates craze is going to sweep this nation in no time.

For the Love of God please let this be true: Two groups have interest in buying Thrashers, Hawks, and Philips Arena

If you aren't familiar with the ownership group of the Atlanta Spirit then you are one of the lucky ones. The Atlanta Spitir is a group of douchebags who own the Atlanta Hawks, Thrashers, and Philips Arena. Here is some video for reference:



As you can see they would rather piss on themselves then put out a good product. They bitch and moan about fans not showing up but if they actually tried to put a quality product on the ice in case of the Thrashers people will show up. The one season when the Thrashers made the playoffs they averaged over 17,000 in attendance. The problem is they have only had one playoff season in over 12 years of existence. The Atlanta Spirit has been trying to sell the Thrashers since 2005. They are a group of idiots who have no fucking clue what they are doing. Thankfully all could be saved if Arthur Blank, Ted Turner, or some other rich dude came in and bought them out.

Well those prayers might be answered according to the AJC.com...

There are two prospective investment groups inquiring about purchasing the Hawks, Thrashers and Philips Arena, according to several people familiar with the situation. Both groups plan to keep the Thrashers in Atlanta.

A deal is not close in either case as proper paperwork has not been filed to begin serious negotiations. However, at least one group has met with the officials from the NBA and the NHL.

With the group that has met with league officials, including the NHL on Thursday, there is one main investor with others in the group, some of whom are from Atlanta. The group is not only interested in purchasing the three properties but there is a “development element” to the deal, possibly involving the area around the arena.

The Hawks, Thrashers and Philips Arena, owned by the Atlanta Spirit, have been for sale and groups have expressed interest in buying the Thrashers and moving them to another city. Canadian cities Winnipeg, Quebec and Hamilton have long been rumored to be a possible destination.

Atlanta Spirit co-owner Michael Gearon Jr. recently told the Atlanta Journal-Constitution that there is a “sense of urgency” to find a buyer or additional investors to keep the Thrashers in Atlanta.

According to those familiar with the situation, it would take at least a month to complete due diligence on a proposal and at least another month to complete negotiations.

The two interested parties do not include Atlanta native Stephen Rollins, who has publicly stated a desire for his multi-city investment group to purchase the Thrashers. That group is said to still be interested but a formal bid has not been made at this point.

At this point I would take anybody as an owner as long as the name Peter Angelos isn't attached to it. This looks like potentially great news in keeping the Thrashers in Atlanta. They need to stay because people will support the team if you look like you actually care about putting the best product on the ice. No more nickel and dime bull shit. No more letting your star players leave (Heatley, Kovy, Hossa, and Savard).

And while we are at it no more Hawks giving Joe Johnson max contracts when they should be giving stars like Dwight Howard and Chris Paul those type of contracts. Right now I really wish the Hawks could somehow dump Johnson and his massive contract and go full tilt for Howard and Paul in 2012.

Kyle Rudolph Notre Dame Game Used Home Navy Jersey for sale

This is yet another game used Notre Dame football jersey we got in from Steiner Sports. This is from the 2008 season and it was worn by Kyle Rudolph. It has some heavy scuff marks around the collar on the front and you can tell Rudolph went to war with this jersey in Notre Dame Stadium. This is his home navy jersey from his freshman season. There is only one available so it's first come first serve. This is your chance to own a piece of Notre Dame history. Rudolph is projected to be the top tight end taken in this year's NFL Draft.

Kyle Rudolph Game Used Notre Dame Home Jersey

MLB.COM'S Top 50 Prospects

I watched the MLB Network last night reveal their top 50 prospects in the game and was surprised by some of the rankings. First off I was almost positive Bryce Harper would be #1. How could he not be? The kid tore it up at junior college ball when he should have still been in high school and he played above and beyond in the Arizona Fall League. He should be the #1 prospect but what the hell do I know? Last year the #1 prospect was some guy named Jason Heyward. He lost the ROY to Buster Posey who was ranked #4. The #10 guy was Madison Bumgarner who won huge games for the Giants in the playoffs. If you are in the top 10 of this list the chances are you could be making an impact at the Major League level this year. So here is the list with some quick thoughts on the player.

1. Mike Trout, Angels-Trout wasn't even a top 50 prospect (#85) last year but after a stellar 2010 the future corner outfielder is a speedy, get on-base guy with a little bit of pop in his bat. Not a big guy but he reminds me of a white version of Rickey Henderson.
2. Jeremy Hellickson, Rays-The Rays will look to replace Garza with Hellickson. Similar makeup to Greg Maddux.
3. Bryce Harper, Nationals-He's on the 40 man roster but won't make the team out of camp. He could get a late season call-up for the struggling Nationals to sell some tickets.
4. Domonic Brown, Phillies-Kind of overrated in my opinion. The heir apparent to Jayson Werth.
5. Dustin Ackley, Mariners-Struggled in his first minor league season out of college but tore it up in the Arizona Fall League. Should be up in the majors soon.
6. Aroldis Chapman, Reds-The Cuban Missile throws 105 mph. Already up with the big league team he should be a future closer.
7. Mike Moustakas, Royals-The first of many Royals on this list, Moustakas hopefully will become the next George Brett and not the next Alex Gordon.
8. Eric Hosmer, Royals-I think he should be a top 5 prospect. Hosmer is going to be a superstar. Reminds me of Joey Votto.
9. Jesus Montero, Yankees-Extremely overrated catcher and of course he is put in the top 10 because he is in the Yankees organization. Terrible arm, decent bat.
10. Julio Teheran, Braves-Drawing comparisons to Pedro Martinez because of his size and his lively arm. Has a chance to grab the #5 spot in the rotations with a great spring.
11. Desmond Jennings, Rays-Do or die time for Jennings. A lot of hype but has yet to impress at the big league level. Carl Crawford's replacement.
12. Kyle Drabek, Blue Jays-Great minor league numbers but has yet to show anything in the majors. Could develop over time.
13. Michael Pineda, Mariners-Big, strong righty who can bring it.
14. Mike Montgomery, Royals-The top lefty prospect in the game, Montgomery has a plus fastball and curve to go along with a good change.
15. Jacob Turner, Tigers-The Tigers have found another great young starter in Turner. He should be up by 2012.
16. Wil Myers, Royals-He's the best hitting catcher in the minors in my opinion. Could be switched to outfield and be up in KC by the end of this season.
17. Freddie Freeman, Braves-He's been handed the 1st base job for the Bravos. Has a chance to shine after slugging a massive HR off Roy Halladay during his brief call-up last season.
18. Jameson Taillon, Pirates-Josh Beckett-like stuff with more control. Jameson will be a future ace.
19. Zach Britton, Orioles-Draws some comparisons to former Orioles farmhand Erik Bedard. He has great off speed stuff that creates a lot of groundballs. Has a chance to make the Orioles rotation by 2012.
20. Shelby Miller, Cardinals-Has great stuff he just needs to improve his control.
21. Mike Minor, Braves-Will be the #5 starter for the Braves this year. Doesn't have great stuff but he gets outs and knows how to pitch.
22. Casey Kelly, Padres-A solid righty obtained in the Adrian Gonzalez deal, he should start in AA in his third season as a pitcher after moving from shortstop.
23. Martin Perez, Rangers-Just 19 years old, he struggled last season but this lefty has a mid 90's fastball with a devastating curve.
24. Manny Machado, Orioles-The #1 shortstop prospect should probably be rated a little higher. Think more future Tulo than A-Rod.
25. Chris Sale, White Sox-Already a reliever with the big league club, the White Sox should give him a shot for their rotation this season.
26. Brandon Belt, Giants-Absolutely tore it up last year on three levels and is the future 1b for the Giants.
27. Matt Moore, Rays-Another southpaw in the Rays organization who led all of the minor leagues last year in K's. He should start in AA this season.
28. Brett Lawrie, Blue Jays-A tad overrated in my opinion he was acquired in the Shaun Marcum trade. Should start in AAA this season.
29. Jarrod Parker, D-backs-Still rebounding from Tommy John surgery he will probably be in AA to start with a fast promotion to possible the bigs if he produces.
30. Jonathan Singleton, Phillies-
31. Jordan Lyles, Astros |
32. Gary Sanchez, Yankees |
33. Tyler Matzek, Rockies-I really wish the Orioles would have drafted this kid in 2009 instead of Matt Hobgood. Has some issues with command but he is a lefty who is a strikeout machine.
34. John Lamb, Royals |
35. Manny Banuelos, Yankees |
36. Lonnie Chisenhall, Indians |
37. Jake Odorizzi, Royals |
38. Nick Franklin, Mariners |
39. Aaron Hicks, Twins |
40. Kyle Gibson, Twins |
41. Wilin Rosario, Rockies |
42. Jose Iglesias, Red Sox |
43. Tanner Scheppers, Rangers |
44. Dee Gordon, Dodgers |
45. Devin Mesoraco, Reds |
46. Brett Jackson, Cubs |
47. Chris Archer, Rays |
48. J.P. Arencibia, Blue Jays |
49. Yonder Alonso, Reds-Trade bait for the Reds since Alonso is blocked by Joey Votto.
50. Christian Friedrich, Rockies |

FOR THE HELL OF IT: KATE UPTON

Kate Upton is the newest SI Swimsuit "it" girl. And by "it" I mean she has a really great pair of ankles. Damn those ankles are fucking hot.

Tim Floyd goes Jerry Springer on refs, has to be led off by a cop

UTEP head coach Tim Floyd went ape shit last night at East Carolina and had to literally be pushed off the court and separated from arguing with the referees by the cops. Now that is some serious Jerry Springer shit if I have ever seen it. I was just waiting for a Floyd's midget cousin to run out and start doing karate kicks. Then you know Steve from security would pick both of them up and drag them off the court while the other cousin who is a little overweight but has big tits somehow has the puppies pop out and screams obsenities while the crowd goes nuts. Come to think of it I kind of miss Springer.

First Pujols. Then Wainwright. Now it sounds like Carpenter wants to flee the sinking ship in St. Louis

Apparently when it rains in St. Louis it also pours. Albert Pujols and Adam Wainwright have both delivered lightning bolts for the Cardinals and today starter Chris Carpenter offered up this little doozy...

"It's not up to me," said Carpenter. "If the Cardinals wanted to trade me, obviously I would go. There's no question about that. I'm not going hold back or veto or do anything like that if they're looking to move me.

"I'm not concerned about it, though. I'm concerned about getting myself ready to pitch at the beginning of the season."

If you are reading between the lines like myself it sounds like Carpenter is willing to leave right away if the Cardinals want to trade him. Carps, 36, in the final year of his contract with $15 million owed this season with a club option for $15 million in 2012 sounds like he wants to go to a team who can contend for a World Series. Carps is reaching the tail end of his career and is still got a ton of trade value. The Cardinals could look to go full rebuild mode starting now by trading Carps for some prospects. Besides Shelby Miller in the minors the Cardinals have very little young talent up and coming. If they could somehow convince Pujols to waive his no trade they could get a ton for the slugger who looks to be on his way out.

So what do you do if you are St. Louis? Continue to rely on a few aging superstars who could leave in a year with little compensation or do you try to resign them, up your payroll significantly and go the Yankees way by adding more veteran starters?

Bel Biv Devoe has still got it

Dude I use to jam Bel Biv Devoe every fucking day when I was in middle school. Just hearing them rock out "Poison" with The Roots on the Late Show with Jimmy Fallon brings back a ton of memories. "Never trust a big butt and a smile" still pops up in my head when I come up to bat in baseball. "Poison" use to be my relaxing music I would play before my baseball games to get me ready. It was a strange combination of Guns N Roses, The Doors, and Bel Biv Devoe before all my games. Literally when I would rip a double I would be singing in my head "that ball is poison" just to fuck around with the lyrics.

Anyways it's great to see the trio still has the flow going. They sound damn good. The dance moves aren't as crisp (my buddies Jason and Jaime could nail them, me not so much) but the sound and rhythm is definitely still there. I would pay to see these guys tour again.

Video via Extra Mustard

Another Trick Shot Quarterback: Alex Tanney

Monmouth College quarterback Alex Tanney saw UCONN's Johnny Mac with the amazing trick shot video a couple of weeks ago. He decided to make his own. You be the judge. Who has the better trick shot video?

Oscar Talk with Mike Tyson

Oscar Talk with Mike Tyson & Leonard Maltin from Mike Tyson

The Champ still has it. Without the Funky Bunch Marky Mark has no chance of winning best film for "The Fighter." Tyson knows his shit. Who am I to argue with his brilliant commentary?

I think the chances are pretty good Leonard Maltin shit himself during this sketch. I would.

Emmy Rossum makes "Shameless" must-see TV

If you have Showtime you owe it to yourself to watch "Shameless" because actress Emmy Rossum is basically butt naked in every other episode. The show is good too and the chances are it will make you laugh at the Gallagher family because of the toxicity of the family and their relationships. But Rossum is the star and if you enjoy nudity (seriously who doesn't?) then I definitely recommend putting "Shameless" on your DVR or on your Netflix when season 1 ends.

By the way what in the hell happened to HBO? Granted they had "Boardwalk Empire" this past year which was incredible but they have really struggled to put out good shows while Showtime is just killing it. "Big Love" is awful. "Entourage" is old news. "Curb Your Enthusiasm" comes on once every five years. Meantime Showtime puts out hits like "Californication" and "Dexter" and "Nurse Jackie" and even "Episodes" with Matt LeBlanc had hilarious writing.

Come on HBO. Step it up.


Anyways enjoy these very NSFW clips of Rossum in "Shameless"...

Emmy Rossum Topless Pool Scene in Shameless
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emmy-rossum-shameless-sexy-clip
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Emmy Rossum Shameless Love Scene
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Another Blake Griffin Epic Dunk

Blake Griffin messed around and nearly got a triple-double last night in a homecoming of sorts in Oklahoma City. Unfortunately for him the rest of his team kind of sucks (Baron Davis still has some game left in him) and Kevin Durant led a blowout for the Thunder. The Clippers aren't going to make the playoffs but one could argue The Blake Show has been the most exciting thing to watch in the NBA this season. The Clippers should just go balls to the wall and try to sign Chris Paul and Dwight Howard in 2012. It's time for the Clippers to stop being the shit on the bottom of the NBA's massive shoes. Be the cock for once. With that being so eloquently put Paul will probably go join Melo and Amare in New York and Howard will sign with the other LA team.

Cardinals lose Adam Wainwright for the season

Spring Training hasn't even technically started their games and already the St. Louis Cardinals have been dealt with two huge blows to the ribs. Or in this case elbow. Cardinal's ace Adam Wainwright has a "significant injury" to his right pitching elbow according to general manager John Mozeliak. The injury happened Monday during a bullpen session and it looks like there is a significant tear in the ligament which means Wainwright, who finished 2nd place for the Cy Young last season with a 20-11 record and a 2.42 ERA, would need Tommy John surgery and be lost for the season if not more.

This is yet another crushing blow to the Cardinals organization. Just last week they found out Albert Pujols would not be resigning before the season started and could lose the future Hall of Famer in free agency after this season. With the cloud already lingering over the organization with the failure to secure a contract for the best player in the game they might have just lost the best pitcher in the National League in Wainwright (with all due respect to Doc Halladay). Not to mention one of their rivals in the Milwaukee Brewers made significant improvements with the additions of starters Zack Greinke and Shaun Marcum to go along with Yovani Gallardo and Randy Wolf in the starting rotation and it is clear that the Cardinals will finish no better than third in the NL Central this season. Division champ Cincinnati is the favorite and the Cubs have a good chance to be much improved with the additions of Matt Garza and Carlos Pena.

So where do the Cardinals go from here? They still have Chris Carpenter as their other ace but we all know his injury issues. They are going to have to rely on Jaime Garcia repeating his stellar rookie numbers and newcomer Jake Westbrook catching some of that Dave Duncan magic to compete in the Central. The season isn't over by any means but it became a hell of a lot harder to see the Cardinals competing for a playoff berth in 2011 without Wainwright.

Jason Heyward and Freddie Freeman on the SI Cover

You know when you get that sick feeling in your stomach? Like somebody just hit you in the balls and you can feel the pain getting worse and worse. This is how I felt when I saw Freddie Freeman and Jason Heyward on this week's Sports Illustrated cover. Two young Atlanta Braves sluggers with their whole future ahead of them. A deadly duo who at just 21 years of age could be the building blocks of future pennants gracing the Turner Field walls. But now I don't feel good because I know all about the SI cover jinx. It's notorious for knocking down hyped phenoms. All Braves fans remember Jeff Francoeur and his infamous "The Natural" cover 6 years ago. Yeah that didn't turn out so well for the last Brave who was considered the hometown hero. I still have fresh memories of last year's Spring Training coverboy in Matt Wieters.

"The Perfect Catch" eh? I guess if you consider a .319 OBA and a slugging percentage of .377 as Mauer-like but I most certainly do not. Listen I love the hype that these kids get. It just scares the shit out of me when it's somebody on the team I root for. Instantly the guy has a target on his back and unless his name is Michael Jordan they usually don't live up to the enormous hype. I mean fuck SI, why couldn't you put Albert Pujols or the Phillies starting rotation on there? Those are more interesting spring training stories. Jinx them. Not us.

To read more on the SI cover story go to Jeff Schultz piece in the AJC.com

Kyle Rudolph Game Used Notre Dame Jersey for sale

I just got this in from Steiner Sports who is the exclusive memorabilia dealer for game used Notre Dame jerseys. It's a game worn Kyle Rudolph road jersey from his freshman season in 2008. During his freshman season Rudolph was the first ever tight end to start the season opener and went on to set freshman receiving records while hauling in 29 receptions for 340 yards and 2 touchdowns while starting all 13 games. This is a chance to own a piece of Notre Dame history. Rudolph is expected to be the top NFL tight end pick in the upcoming April NFL Draft.

KYLE RUDOLPH GAME USED NOTRE DAME WHITE JERSEY-2008

Mr. Brooklyn Decker with the impressive tennis shot

You gotta hand it to Andy Roddick. While his wife Brooklyn Decker in on the road promoting her movie with her huge cans and no doubt getting plowed by every A-list actor out there in Hollywood he is making amazing diving tennis shots for a ATP championship in Memphis. The actual chances of their marriage surviving past 2 more years in fading faster than Roddick's hairline.




Video via ExtraMustard

Braves GM Frank Wren thinks the defense isn't a concern

Atlanta Braves GM Frank Wren must be living near a meth house if he honestly doesn't think defense is a concern for his ballclub after last year's disastrous performance in the field. Stop breathing in those fumes asshole. Defense is extremely important when it comes to playing winning baseball. Maybe not as important as pitching but it's right up there. Here is what Wren had to say about the defense. And remember last year the Braves committed 126 errors (1 off the league high) and now have a second baseman in Dan Uggla who has the most errors for a 2bagger for the past two seasons. And oh yeah Chipper ain't exactly Brooksie over at the hot corner with his bum knees.

“At the end of the day, I don’t think errors contribute a great deal to losses,” Braves general manager Frank Wren said. “I mean, that [126 errors] is still less than an error a game. And it depends on when the errors happens. With nobody on, you boot a ground ball and then you get a double play, it’s an error. But all errors aren’t created equal.

“I think that’s much overblown. When you put together your team, it’s the full contribution of players. What they do, whether it’s running the bases, or offensively, there’s lots of other things that guys can do, which add to your ballclub.”

I guess Wren decided not to watch Brooks Conrad personally butcher the playoff series with the Giants last year because I'm pretty sure his defense fucked us in that game. I also tend to remember a lot of wins literally being thrown away because of crucial errors from our infielders including one Brian McCann. But yeah defense isn't a major concern at all. Especially with your starting All Star second baseman Martin Prado playing left field for the very first time (Prado should be at second base IMO while Uggla should be in left). Listen Wren. Defense wins you games. Especially in the playoffs. So don't be a dickhead and say it's not a concern.

I'm not nearly as optimistic about the Braves chances this year as I was last year. Last year I thought they could make a run for the World Series because it was Bobby's last year and the pitching could get them over the hump come playoff time. This year I have my doubts they even make the playoffs. The Braves have some potentially huge holes at both corners of the infield (Freddie Freeman is a rookie who only hit .167 during his short time in Atlanta and Chipper Jones is 39 and coming off another knee injury) and the outfield has potential with Jason Heyward (trying to forget his disastrous second half and brutal playoff performance) evolving into the superstar we all know he can be and Prado having another MVP season but does anybody in the Braves organization really expect anything from CF Nate McLouth? The problem with the Braves last season was they had horrible defense, didn't have good baserunners, and the lineup didn't have much pop. This year the defense looks like it will again be average to awful while there are still no speed guys and Uggla does bring the pop but what do they really expect to get out of premium power hitting positions such as 1B, 3B, and CF? Because right now I don't expect too much out of Freeman, McLouth and Chipper this season for various reasons (rookie mistakes to self confidence issues to washed up superstar).

And I'm not even going to mention the pitching which could potentially be league average. In order for the Braves to reach the playoffs they need to have great pitching and great defense this season. If Wren doesn't see it then either he is fooling himself or is just a fool. Hopefully just the first option.

News Anchor gets burned by co-worker

Well played. The guy kind of deserved it right? I mean you don't leave yourself open to that burn especially if you got a small pecker.

Aaron Murray breaks ankle in two places UPDATE: JUST A SPRAIN

According to Zach Dillard over at redandblack.com Georgia starting quarterback Aaron Murray has broken his ankle in two places.

Update: Official word on the injury is set to be released by Georgia later today after Murray is checked out by the team’s medical staff.

Georgia starting quarterback Aaron Murray has suffered an ankle injury, though the severity of the injury has not been officially announced yet.

Team sources say Murray’s right ankle is broken in two places, but associate athletic director Claude Felton was not available to confirm or deny the report.

Team sources say that Murray broke the ankle participating in an activity with teammates and friends on Saturday afternoon. Murray was rushed to team doctors after suffering the injury.

Murray was seen using crutches around campus Monday.

Murray was a candidate for SEC freshman of the year after an excellent showing in his first year at the helm of the Bulldogs’ offense. He accumulated 3,049 passing yards and 24 touchdowns in the regular season, while throwing just six interceptions.

He is slated to be the starter at quarterback again next season.

If the ankle is broken, it would likely hold Murray out of all of spring practice, creating another setback for a program looking to bounce back from a disappointing 6-7 season.

If this is true then it's another huge blow to the Georgia football program. Murray in my mind was the best freshman qb (albeit redshirt) in the nation and has the potential to lead the Bulldogs back to the promise land of a SEC Championship. Without him Georgia is in a word: fucked. The depth chart at QB includes sophomore Hutson Mason who has very little experience and incoming true freshman Christian LeMay who did not even play his senior year in high school. If Georgia is to contend for the SEC East in 2011 they are going to need a healthy Murray especially with the losses on the offensive line and some receiver called A.J. Green, you may have heard of him.

UPDATE: Bulldog Nation can take a deep breath and exhale. Murray's injury is diagnosed as a minor sprain of the right ankle. His x-rays were negative and he will be ready for spring practice. The injury occurred during a pick-up soccer game in Athens on Saturday.

Fuck You Minnesota! The Twins unveil a Hrbek-Gant bobblehead

It's been 20 years now but I still remember this absolute bullshit play from the 1991 World Series. Minnesota Twin's first baseman Kent Hrbek pulled the ultimate dick move and literally carried Atlanta Braves outfielder Ron Gant off the bag at first base like he was Ric Flair. It was a garbage play and of course with the Braves luck the umpire called out Gant. Fucking shit it still pisses me off. Not as bad as the Jeffrey Mayer call but it's a close second. Well just to prove how big of a dick the whole state of Minnesota is the Twins are coming out with the Hrbek-Gant bobblehead giveaway this season to commerate it. I'm not even shittin ya. A bobblehead to display a play which cheated their way to a 4-3 series win. Fuck you Minnesota! Fuck you!

By the way the bobblehead sucks. Hrbek isn't nearly fat enough and there is no way Roberto Kelly was pulled off the bag. Oh that's suppose to be Ron Gant? Could have fooled me assholes!

Kobe throws down the Black Mamba in Lebron's face

This is for all the Lebron cock gobblers out there. While Lebron was messing around and getting a triple double Kobe was throwing down dunks and hitting threes and winning the MVP while leading his team to another victory. Kobe>Lebron? You be the judge.

Blake Griffin's 360 behind-the-head dunk

This was the 2011 Dunk Contest winner's first dunk of the night. It was also Blake Griffin's best dunk. The over the car dunk was cool but I don't think the difficulty was as high as this one. Watching it in slow motion is a thing of beauty.

The most impressive dunk of the night and the guy who probably could have won it if it didn't come down to fan voting was Washington's JaVale McGee with this double dunk...



Unfuckinbelievable. The 2011 Dunk Contest was the best ever in my opinion. The first round was insane with all 4 contestants nailing poster perfect dunks. Check out this legit behind the free throw line dunk from Air Congo Serge Ibaka...



...and he finished last. The NBA put on a great show Saturday night. Nobody got killed which is always a plus.

For the HELL OF IT: MINKA KELLY

Blake Griffin's First Half Dunks

Blake Griffin is the most exciting player to watch since Lebron James made his debut straight out of high school. I would argue Griffin is bringing back nonchalant fans like myself who haven't really paid too much attention to the NBA since some guy named Michael Jordan was winning rings in Chicago. The video above is from Deadspin and it chronicles every single one of his 140 dunks so far in the NBA.

Oh by the way the rumor is for tomorrow's slam dunk contest in Los Angeles Griffin will be jumping over...get this...a Bentley. With a major celebrity of some sort throwing the pass from inside the car and out the sunroof. If this happens it will be the greatest YouTube dunk in the history of YouTube dunks.

Stan Musial did what in the Navy?

Stan Musial missed a season in his prime in order to suck cock in the Navy? Talk about sucking it up and taking one for your country. Stan the Man is a true American hero.

Video via Hot Clicks

NFL Prospects are Scared by Gorilla

Via Hot Clicks

Operation: Destroy Toomer's Corner

I fucking knew Nick Saban was up to his old tricks. Disgraceful.

I can't help but laugh at Gene Chizik going ape shit. Sorry Auburn fans but this is hilarious.

Miguel Cabrera likes to party

Detroit Tigers first baseman apparently likes the booze a little too much. Cabrera was arrested last night for DUI after registering a staggering 0.26 BAC (.08 is the legal limit) with a bottle of James Buchanan Scotch in his car. The bottle wasn't just sitting there in the backseat when the officer approached Cabrera. He was fucking swigging from it! The officer then told Cabrera to follow his orders and Miggy responded in classic athlete style:" Do you know who I am, you don't know anything about my problems!"

This is Cabrera's second arrest due to alcohol problems. In 2009 he was arrested after getting in a fight with his wife when he was shitfaced smack dab in the middle of the season. Come on Cabrera. Everybody knows you get drunk during the offseason. It's ballplayer 101. Spring Training just started and you get caught doing a Tony Larussa? No doubt his punishment will be Jim Leyland cigarette burns to his forearms.

The Tigers don't need any more distractions from Cabrera. In fact they might want to just unload his alcohol problems on the Atlanta Braves. I'm thinking a Brooks Conrad and Kenshin Kawakami gets it done. Maybe throw in some Maker's Mark and a Pontiac to sweeten the honey pot for Detroit. Sounds fair to me.

Auburn's Toomer's Corner poisoning should piss of ALL college football fans

One of the great things about college football that separates it from the NFL is the traditions each school has. Whether it be Howard's Rock at Clemson or Touchdown Jesus at Notre Dame or The Grove at Ole Miss each one of those certain traditions is dear and very prideful for the alums and fans of those certain schools. It's the traditions that help identify the school and is passed on from generation to generation. Unfortunately some Bammer asshole named "Al from Dadeville" has poisoned and will eventually kill one of Auburn's best traditions: Toomer's Corner.

Toomer's Corner are the majestic live oaks at the intersection of Magnolia and College streets in Auburn, AL. The oaks are over 130 years old and they mark the transition from downtown Auburn to the university campus. They were named after Toomer's Drug Store which has been a landmark for the town. It has become a tradition to roll the massive oaks after a big win for Auburn. Most recently the trees were rolled when Auburn won the BCS National Championship in January. Unfortunately those trees are now poisoned by one deranged fan.

"Al from Dadeville" called into the Paul Finebaum show and laid claim to poisoning the trees with a large quantity of Spike 80DF (tebuthiuron) on January 27th. "Al" who is no doubt deranged claimed he did it in retaliation for the posting of pictures showing Auburn fans rolling Toomer's Corner after the death of Alabama's iconic coach Bear Bryant in 1983 as well as photos of Cam Newton's #2 jersey placed on the Bear Bryant statue during the 2010 season. Auburn officials immediately tested the soil at Toomer's Corner and did find lethal doses of Spike 80DF. Yesterday it was confirmed the oaks could not be saved. They are slowly dying and eventually the tradition that is Toomer's Corner will go with it.

As a college football fan this should really piss you off even if you are not a fan of Auburn. I honestly could not imagine a Trojans fan going to Notre Dame and defacing Touchdown Jesus or torching the grotto. What if a Florida fan went to Sanford Stadium and poisoned UGA and the shrubs? Could you imagine how infuriated you would become if this happened? Rivalries are great for college football but when a fan like "Al" takes it to a poisoning and killing live things level then it has just gone way too far.

This morning "Al from Dadeville" was arrested. His name is Harvey Almorn Updyke, Jr. and you would think this was probably some idiot teenager who did it. Wrong. Harvey is an unemployed 62 year old man. He is being charged with a Class C felony of criminal mischief and if convicted he could serve 1-10 years in prison. A 62 year old man? What a fucking loser.

Harvey has stolen the future memories of the many generations of Auburn fans who would have rolled Toomer's Corner in celebration. In a way he has taken away the identity of the university. Those memories of Toomer's Corner will be gone with the next generation. It's unfortunate a 62 year old redneck like Harvey can poison and destroy those memories. Hopefully with all traditions such as Toomer's Corner something can be done to resuscitate it. Auburn can't let Toomer's Corner disappear because of a Bammer. It must be replaced. Auburn Nation is hurting right now and hopefully the fans and alumni take the high road and don't try to retaliate. Don't be like Harvey. Let the team take out their frustrations at the next Iron Bowl. It's what Toomer's Corner would have wanted.

Brooklyn Decker SI Swimsuit 2011 Video

Yesterday we had the pictures of Brooklyn Decker and today we have the actual video of her. Isn't it crazy to see her in moving form? It's almost like she is real. I got to say she looks a hell of a lot better on the beach then she does in my cellar with electric tape over her mouth. It's amazing how unsexy a sex slave can look these days. They don't make them like they used to.

An extremely rare soccer post: Wayne Rooney's bicycle kick goal

I've gotten a few shout outs from some SportsCrack heads out there about this unbelievable goal from Wayne Rooney. Not too shabby coming from a bloody Limey such as Rooney. Apparently it was the game winner vs. Manchester City. Awesome. Now wake me up when the World Cup starts.

The Serene Branson Remix Video

Those dickheads at CBS have pulled all the original footage of Serene Branson mucking up her live Grammy report from YouTube so we are left with the one and only "Serene Branson Remix Video." The Shebot was trying to communicate to us and clearly her batteries were dying. Fucking Duracells.

Video via WarmingGlow

Brooklyn Decker Sports Illustrated 2011 photos

I posted these pictures because I need the traffic and I was starting to feel bad for Brooklyn Decker. The girl is obviously hurting for publicity right now.

For more photos go to SI.com

Would Albert Pujols really pull a Lebron?

As you probably know Albert Pujols will be a free agent after the 2011 season. He is the greatest right handed hitter of the past 50 years. Maybe ever. And yes he deserves a shitload of money. But would he really leave the only franchise he has ever played for and a city that absolutely loves him for more money from say the Chicago Cubs?

I hope not.

First and foremost I have no horse in this race. I'm not a St. Louis Cardinals fan. I'm a baseball fan. I have paid money on numerous occasions just to see Pujols play in Turner Field. I love the way he plays the game and I honestly think he is underrated in a way. People still talk about Bonds or A-Rod as being the best player of their generation. Negative. Pujols is by far the best player in baseball. No questions asked. But would the best player in the game pull a Lebron James and ditch the city and fans who have given him nothing but love and admiration for most of his career?

Yes.

Pujols supposedly wants a 10-year deal worth $300 million. He is currently 31 years old so he is already technically past his prime. With PEDs gone from the game (except in Canada) you can no longer expect an aging slugger to hit 40 plus homers in a season in their 35-40 age years like Pujols did in his mid 20's. So is Pujols worth $300 million realistically? Absolutely not. But I do believe he is worth $30 million a season right now. Especially to the Cardinals and their franchise.

Personally I don't want to see Pujols pull a Lebron and ditch St. Louis. I like seeing great players start and finish their careers in one city. The Cardinals are owned by the Busch family. I'm sure they can afford to give Albert what he wants. But Albert and his agent need to be realistic. If he did get a $300 million dollar deal from St. Louis or any team minus the Yankees and Red Sox it would seriously cripple the team's ability to compete by affording other players on the roster. Pujols is a team player from what I have seen. He plays hurt and he has carried a lineup with little protection throughout his entire career in the arch city. But if he really wants this massive deal and is willing to leave St. Louis because they won't give it to him then he is as big of a dick as Lebron.

The solution to all of this is a 5-year deal for $150 million. It's fair for both sides. Pujols deserves $30 million a season and St. Louis should give it to him. But he doesn't deserve anything past 5 years in my opinion. He won't be crushing the ball as much and he will lose significant bat speed by his mid 30's. It's not up for discussion because it's a fact of life. Whether or not Albert is willing to take such a deal is up for discussion. And if he isn't then I would be disappointed because all along it was just about the money.

In a way it would make him worse than Lebron. We will find out by noon tomorrow either way since Pujols set a deadline to make a deal done before shutting it down till after the season. If you thought Cleveland was bad with fans burning Lebron jerseys after he decided to leave for sunny Miami you can only imagine the carnage that would be left behind if Pujols left to sign for the Cubs.

What's it going to be Pujols? Hero or villain? The baseball world awaits.

Irina Shayk is the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Cover Girl

Honestly I don't think I've opened a Swimsuit issue for at least a decade. Shit it might be since high school. I mean what is the point? Since the internet has come around and porn is free I don't get why people want to look at models in swimsuits. But with that ringing endorsement here is 25-year old Russian model Irina Shayk on the cover of SI. She is currently dating soccer player Cristiano Ronaldo. Good for her. If the modeling thing doesn't work out for her then she can always fall back on Ronaldo's money. I mean look at what happened to last year's cover model in Brooklyn Decker. She fell off the face of the planet soon after the cover hit newstands. In fact I'm pretty sure she is blowing dudes for meth as I type this.

With that thought in the back of your head take a look at these Irina videos....

Charlie Sheen talks to the Dan Patrick Show

Charlie Sheen sounds like a guy's guy. He hates AA. I hate AA. He loves blow. I do blow. He smacks around women. I...wait a fucking second. Ok maybe we aren't just alike. I would love to see Sheen recover and get the help he needs. I mean it must totally suck to be such a mess that your everyday activities including sex with porn stars, drugs, alcohol, and making a shitload of money. Poor guy. I sure hope he recovers and finds his higher power.

Oh and by the way if you haven't listened to the Dan Patrick Show you can't call yourself a human being much less a sports fan. Patrick's show is funny as shit and his quick wit makes it easy listening. Plus the guy has made a bigger name for himself since he left the 4 letter network. You can listen to his show at DanPatrick.com. I know it may be hard for some of you drunks to remember so I will say it again. Listen to DanPatrick.com. He is your higher power.