SportsCrack Blog

Monday, May 19, 2008


I just got back from a ten hour flight full of sweaty, B.O. stricken Europeans and fat Americans and am now sitting comfortably naked in front of my laptop eating peanut butter while my dogs get dangerously close. I'm just joking. I just got back from the movie theater watching Made of Honor with my wife with that hilarious and down right hunky Patrick Dempsey. See, I told everybody marriage wouldn't change me. And yes, Dempsey's hair is TOO die for. Does he just wake up with that marvelous mop every morning and kiss babies and make the world a better place?

Okay, I've been gone for way too long and need to get my sports fix back on. Europe was a blast no doubt but I honestly could care less about Hand Ball unless it involves me waking up and going to YouPorn. And soccer is still soccer and not fucking football! I tried to attend a game in Munich for some team called Bayern but then I realized there are 4 great Beer Gardens within the city so that was quickly nixed. I couldn't get one fucking baseball highlight over there which means I missed countless hours of talk about the Yankees slide and how the Red Sox are the greatest thing to happen to baseball since Jeffrey Mayer changed the fate of the game. But it was great to get back and turn on the tube and see my Baltimore Orioles are still playing great baseball despite having a starting lineup with more holes than a Greg Popovich close up. Hell, I ran into this wonderful, crazy mess of Marylanders preparing for Preakness by taking in an Orioles sweep of Boston last week...
HT to Mr. Irrelevant for the great footage.
Yeah, things have changed in Baltimore and it's not really smart to go in with a David Ortiz jersey talking shit. But we all know Boston fans are not like this and clearly he was enjoying himself some Dippin Dots and cotton candy before he was ambushed by those ruthless Orioles fans. Anyways, Boston Blows.

Speaking of Preakness, how about that ass kicking Big Brown pulled in Pimlico? I know the majority of you could care less about a horse running around a track unless it blows one of it's legs out but having attended numerous races in Pimlico I tend to love watching a horse dominate while a little man whips it while wearing chaps. But maybe that is just me and Marv Albert who enjoy this type of thing. Seriously though, I'm really pulling for Big Brown to kick ass in Belmont because like a lot of you I have never witnessed a horse take the Triple Crown. Sure the field he is going against might not be the greatest but I think we can all envision a new career for Barry Bonds as a thoroughbred.

It looks like my prediction of Spurs taking it all might be on the line tonight in New Orleans. If I was betting on the game I would run with that 4.5 point dog tonight in the Big Easy. The Spurs know how to win games like these. They will do tons of Manu flops and flagrant foul Chris Paul to death tonight for sure. I'm actually looking forward to this game. The energy should be amazing and if the Hornets don't come out with a deer in headlights look it should be a great game to the finish. Plus we get to hear the great Charles Barkley talk basketball and other irrelevant stuff which never gets old.

It looks like that Penguins trade for Marian Hossa and Pascal Dupuis from Atlanta has really worked out. Hossa looks like he has finally brushed off the playoff monkey off his back and Dupuis has played great too helping Pittsburgh reach the Stanley Cup Finals. The NHL is getting it's wish with their most marketable star in Sidney Crosby already in the Finals at just the age of 20. I'm sure Versus and NBC will be talking about the parallels between Sid and the Great One's career so far.

And I think I should finish off this post with a thank you note to USC for getting away with more shit in the OJ Mayo saga. I'm loving their claims of ignorance and not having any knowledge of wrong doing. Pete Carroll must have done such a hell of job brain washing the NCAA infraction committee for so long that Tim Floyd thought he could get away with shit too. But yeah, FUSC and their pretty girls and their great weather and smog covered beaches and their high priced "student"-athletes.