SportsCrack Blog

Monday, December 30, 2013

Wisconsin Badgers React To Randall Cobb's Game Winning Touchdown

The Wisconsin Badgers football team got together yesterday to watch the Bears-Packers game and as you can see the reactions were mixed.  And by mixed I mean the one dejected Badger in the Bears Matt Forte jersey who simply spiked his water bottle while the rest of his teammates wildly celebrated the improbable Randall Cobb touchdown catch.

Friday, December 27, 2013

A.J. McCarron's Dad is Definitely Smashing Katherine Webb

Look at that sinister grin on A.J. McCarron's dad's face.  High ball in one hand, other hand on his son's girlfriend's leg.  And Katherine Webb is pulling him in while you know he is elbow deep into her.  Yup.  Fucking Dad stole Horseface McGee right from under his tattoo riddled ass.  What...a...boss!

I think Dad even has one of A.J.'s championship rings on his leg grabbing hand.  Scandalous behavior down in Bama.

Chip Kelly Has a Simple Plan on Offense: "Fucking Score Points!"

Simple.  Concise.  Eloquent.  All of these words describe Philadelphia Eagles head coach Chip Kelly's explanation to WR Riley Cooper here.

2014 NFL Mock Draft

With college football season basically done till the meaningless bowls kick in early January it's time to turn my attention on one of my favorite national past times: NFL mock draft.  With my Atlanta Falcons shitting the proverbial bed this season I have been eagerly awaiting the draft since they lost to the lowly New York Jets on Monday Night back in September.  Of course I can't factor in trades that will be made between now and then so if this mock is even 10% correct it's a huge accomplishment.   It's basically on par with SEC "student"-athlete conference test grades.

1.  Houston Texans - The Texans need a quarterback.  In a quarterback driven league they currently don't have one.  Matt Schaub is done.  And the other what's his fucking name blows.   So it comes down to who the Texans with a new coach thinks is the best pro prospect behind center.  Most people think it's Teddy Bridgewater.  I don't think he's worth the risk.  Some others think the Texans take the ultimate risk and go Johnny Manziel.  Not going to happen unless they trade down.  I think when all the dust settles with the combines and scouting reports the pick will be....Fresno State QB Derek Carr.

2. St. Louis Rams - The Rams also need a QB but aren't going to draft one.  Why?  Because they still owe #1 bust Sam Bradford $30 million over the next two seasons.  They are going to ride it out with him.  They don't need defensive ends with Robert Quinn and Chris Long having solid seasons.  More than likely they will look to trade down.  They gotta protect Bradford so my guess with the pick is Texas A&M Jake Matthews.

3. Jax Jaguars - The Jags are taking a QB.  Louisville's Teddy Bridgewater makes the most sense.  I haven't been impressed with his play this season but then again his offensive line hasn't been helping him.  This is a BOOM or BUST pick.

4. Oakland Raiders - The Raiders also need a QB but won't take one.  They always take the shiniest toy in the box.  The toy this year is Jadaveon Clowney.  He may not play wideout but once Clowney gets all that bonus money he's likely to play left out with his non motor.

5. Cleveland Browns - Could we possible have 3 QBs taken in the top 5?  Yes.  The Browns don't have a star at the position and have been desperate to get one for the past 20 years.  Johnny Manziel will sell tickets but is too big of a wildcard to put the franchise shoulders on.  Instead they will go with Central Florida's Blake Bortles.  The only two things I know about Bortles is he somehow led UCF to a BCS Bowl and more importantly his girlfriend is smoking hot.

6. Atlanta Falcons - The Falcons are doing their best to fuck up a top pick by winning meaningless games but luckily the NFL is so devoid of star QBs it won't hurt them.  With Matt Ryan they don't need one so they get their shot at the third best non QB in the draft.  And if the dominoes fall correctly they get the best one in my opinion in UCLA LB Anthony Barr.  Barr is the next Von Miller and will be a superstar in Atlanta.

7. Tampa Bay Buccaneers - The Bucs are bound to do something stupid here.  They aren't going to take a QB because the kid they got from NC State is doing a decent job.  So scratch Johnny Football.  Instead they will go with a receiver.  Clemson's Sammy Watkins is the pick.

8.  Minnesota Vikings - The Mr. Samantha Ponder experiment is over.  Now it's the Johnny Football show!  I can't wait to see what sort of hijinks Manziel gets into in Minnesota.  By the way I love this pick.  I think Manziel can succeed in the NFL.

9. Buffalo Bills - Buffalo still has a team?  I guess you learn something new every day.  The Bills need linemen to protect E.J. Manuel.  My guess is they take Alabama's Cyrus Kouandijo.  With the pick they will introduce a fun new drinking game in Buffalo called "say Cyrus what's his name" 5 straight times without slurring.

10. Tennessee Titans - The Titans need a QB but who do you take?  They can probably get a Tajh Boyd or Aaron Murray type in the 2-4th rounds.  Nobody worth taking a risk here.  So you gotta go with the sure thing.  Notre Dame's Louis Nix is the next great NFL defensive tackle.  Titans are lucky to get their hands on some Irish Chocolate.

11. New York Giants - The Giants need defensive help bad.  So you gotta go with the best talent here because they are deficient in all three levels.  Alabama's C.J. Mosley would be my pick.

12. Pittsburgh Steelers - Feels weird to say this but the Steelers have a lot of holes.  You might as well take the best talent.  I say they go Texas A&M WR Mike Evans.  Roethlisberger could use another target to make unwanted sexual advances with...I mean throw the ball to.

13.  New York Jets - The Jets could use a hybrid DE/OLB since their interior is really good.  Buffalo's Khalil Mack makes the most sense.

14.  St. Louis Rams - Even though the Rams took Jake Matthews with the #2 pick they go offensive tackle again and take Auburn's Greg Robinson.  The hope is one of them pans out.

15.  Detroit Lions - Would the Lions go wide receiver here again?  Not likely with Watkins and Evans off the board.  If they are available then I could see them getting a WR.  Instead they go with a local college product in Michigan State CB Darqueze Denard.

16.  Dallas Cowboys - The Cowboys defense is atrocious.  It's beyond repair right now.  Getting Sean Lee back will help and getting a decent corner would also help tremendously.  They take Oregon CB Ifo Ekpre-Olomu.

17.  Baltimore Ravens - Joe Flacco could use some more targets to throw to but Ozzie Newsome is never the type of GM to pass on the biggest talent.  This year it is Notre Dame defensive end Stephon Tuitt.

18.  San Diego Chargers - Staying on the West Coast is USC's Marqise Lee.  Philip Rivers needs more weapons and Lee should be at least a good #2 receiver his rookie season.

19.  Chicago Bears - I don't see the Bears letting Jay Cutler walk away in free agency.  They have never had a good QB so I don't see why they would let even a decent to good one like Cutler leave and start all over.  The Bears need defensive help.  They can't stop the run.  They also have the worst safeties in the NFL.  Alabama's Ha Ha Clinton-Dix has star potential and is the pick here.

20.  Green Bay Packers - The Packers would be wise to trade down if possible because one of their big needs is a tight end.  At 20 it's too high to take one especially since none of them are superstars but if they do take one at this position I would go with North Carolina's Eric Ebron.

21.  Miami Dolphins -  The Dolphins took a Michigan left tackle a few years ago in Jake Long and continue the tradition with Taylor Lewan.   Hopefully this one pans out for them.

22.  Philadelphia Eagles - Philly needs help in the secondary.  Unfortunately the best players are already gone.  Maybe Philly will be looking to trade up but if not we got to go with Ohio State's cornerback Bradley Roby.

23.  Cleveland Browns - The Browns got this pick from the Colts in the Trent Richardson trade.  With their first pick I had them taking QB Bortles so he will need some protection up front.  Baylor guard Cyril Richardson would be a perfect fit.

24.  Cincinnati Bengals -  They need more help at the outside linebacker position.  Clemson's OLB Vic Beasley should fit in nicely.

25.  New Orleans Saints -  The Saints have plenty of offensive weapons but could use some help on the defensive side of the ball.  Ohio State OLB Ryan Shazier has great instincts and a knack for finding the ball.

26.  Arizona Cardinals -  The Cardinals could take a gamble on a QB late here but I doubt they would take either one of Tajh Boyd or Aaron Murray this high.  Instead they go safe here and take an offensive lineman.  It's somewhat surprising he dropped this far but FSU's OT Cameron Erving could be a steal this late.

27.  Carolina  Panthers -  Cam needs weapons.  Steve Smith is old and Ted Ginn is just a punt returner.  FSU's Kelvin Benjamin has superstar potential if he can get rid of the butterfingers.

28.  Kansas City Chiefs - Chiefs are also looking for receivers.  Penn State's Allen Robinson seems to be the best left on the board at this point.

29.  New England Patriots - With Gronk down with a busted knee and Aaron Hernandez gone for life in jail the Patriots need another tight end for Tom Brady at the end of  his career.  Texas Tech's Jace Amaro should be declaring for the draft and would be a great fit in New England.

30.  San Francisco 49ers - They stick with the M.O and go with the best corner left with Oklahoma State CB Justin Gilbert.

31.  Denver Broncos -  They need a pass rusher at either DE or OLB.  At this point the best available is Missouri's DE Kony Ealy.

32.  Seattle Seahawks - Seattle needs help on both lines but in the end it comes to protecting your most valuable asset: Russell Wilson.  Notre Dame offensive tackle Zach Martin didn't allow a sack all season.

Thursday, December 19, 2013

Jennifer Lawrence Can Play on My Team Any Day, Talks About Butt Plugs on Conan

Jennifer Lawrence might be the perfect girl.  She's cool, laid back, and isn't afraid to make fun of herself.  Plus she isn't too shabby on the eyes.  Oh yeah she's filthy rich too.  The American Hustle star also loves to talk about butt plugs on national television.  I think I'm in love.  You had me at "butt plug" Jennifer.

Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Barry Hinson Can Coach My Team Any Day, Goes on Epic Rant

 Barry Hinson is the head coach of Southern Illinois and went on a rant last night after losing to Murray State 73-65. You can see his frustration build as he calls his players "Mamma's Boys" and then calls his guards "Absolutely Awful" while pointing out his wife could hit more than 2 baskets with her pump fake. He basically said his wife is more of a man than his pussy players. I love this guy. I would love to play for Barry Hinson. He tells it like it is. In today's sports world you can't say shit like this. Honesty is not PC. Fuck that.

True story: last baseball season my team, the Brew Crew, were in the playoffs in a doubleheader when one of our best players in the first inning "pulled something." Mind you we only had about 10 guys there and it was probably around 94 degrees. The guy could still play but couldn't tell me, the coach, what exactly was wrong. So I told him to basically man up because it's the playoffs and we needed him. The guy quit. He packed his bags and said he couldn't play hurt and just walked off. Didn't even bother to take some Ibuprofen or anything or stay and watch his team play. He just fucking walked off. Pathetic. It's not like in baseball you have to be athletic all the time. Half the time you are sitting on the bench with a fat one in your lip. I would shudder to see how Hinson would react if he had that player on his team. Nuclear fall out for sure.

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Just Your Typical Santa Claus Brawl In New York City

Nothing to see here folks. Just another beautiful night in New York City. It's like you can almost smell the despair. Or is that Jack Daniels and urine?

Monday, December 16, 2013

Thursday, December 12, 2013

Whatever Happened To Zane Smith?

Zane dapper.

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

This Makes Perfect Sense: AJ McHandoff Honorable Mention ALL-SEC but Heisman Finalist

I am fully aware Bama QB AJ McCarron has no chance of winning the Heisman Trophy.   It's going to be Jameis Winston's in a landslide.  But what I don't understand is how McHandoff got an invite to New York City.  AJ didn't even earn 2nd team ALL-SEC honors.  That went to Georgia QB Aaron Murray.  1st team of course went to Johnny Manziel.  But yet McCarron gets an all expense trip to the Big Apple.  WTF?

Notable guys who were more deserving: Fresno State QB Derek Carr, Oregon's Marcus Mariota and Baylor's Bryce Petty.

Danica Patrick Seems Like a Wonderful Person To Be Around Who Can Take a Joke

Come on Danica Patrick.  Lighten up.  It's a fucking joke.  It's not like comedian Jay Mohr was making fun of one of your dead relatives.  He was making fun of your shitty driving.  And we all know women can't drive.  That's a fact.  Look it up.  So smile and go make me some pancakes.  Daddy is hungry.

P.S- Danica's boy toy is absolutely terrified of her.  You can see it in his eyes.  He's so afraid to crack a smile because he knows it will cost him in ways we can only imagine.

Friday, December 06, 2013

Teddy Bridgewater With The Play of the Day

This is one hell of a play by Louisville quarterback Teddy Bridgewater here last night vs Cincinnati.  Does this play help cement Bridgewater's status as the #1 pick in the draft?  The consensus among draft experts is Bridgewater will be the first quarterback taken.  The Houston Texans lost their 10th straight last night and now sit in the driver's seat for the #1 overall pick.  The Texans have long been infatuated with Aggies QB Johnny Manziel but before the season started they had no idea they were going to have the 1st pick.  Would you take Manziel #1 overall or would you bank your franchise future on Bridgewater?

Personally I would go Manziel.  I know he's a wild card off the field but eventually he has to grow up.  His upside is huge and with the exception of Jameis Winston I can't think of a better college QB to build my franchise around.  Plus his marketability would be huge in Houston where he is already a known commodity and he would definitely sell tickets and jerseys.  I'm not as impressed with Bridgewater's overall play this season.  Bridgewater, Jadeveon Clowney, and Stephon Tuitt all took step backs in their junior seasons in my opinion.  I thought all 3 of those players would dominate the college game but for the most part they have not lived up to the hype.  All 3 could and should be NFL stars if they stay healthy but their not locks like I thought they were before the season to be franchise difference players.

But the real question remains: Fantasy Football Who are you taking?  Johnny Football or Teddy Ballgame?

Thursday, December 05, 2013

This Iron Bowl 2013 Fake Radio Call Nails It

This radio call is about as real as AJ McCarron's relationship with that horse face who slaps on makeup that Brent Musberger is so infatuated with.  But the good thing about games like this are no matter how dramatic and entertaining they are it isn't life and death.  It's just a game between college boys in pads and helmets.  So don't take it so serious Bama fans.  It's not like another Bama fan would kill you for laughing it off.  Shit.  Never mind.  I guess she was a "die hard" fan.

Tuesday, December 03, 2013

Monday, December 02, 2013

Some Cyber Monday Deals On Shirts including Famous Jameis, Tailgate Like A Champion

We got some GREAT #CyberMonday deals at



USC Agrees To Contract With Steve Sarkasian

As a Notre Dame fan it was with much delight to hear USC has come to an agreement with PAC-12 retread Steve Sarkasian to be their new head coach.  Sarkasian had a 34-29 head coaching record at Washington where he took over a program that was in the shitter left by another PAC-12 retread in Tyrone Willingham.  Granted I have no idea if Sarkasian is a great hire or if he will eventually lead the Trojans back to BCS Bowl games but I'm sure as shit happy they didn't get a Chris Peterson, a James Franklin, a Kevin Sumlin, etc.  The only other hire that would have been worse is bringing back Ed Orgeron.

Congratulations USC.  You have hired more mediocrity.  Average on!

Sunday, December 01, 2013

Auburn and Alabama Fan Reactions To The 2013 Iron Bowl Kick Return

I could watch these all day.  The 2013 Iron Bowl was by far the most insane finish I have ever watched live.  I'm not even a fan of either team but I was jumping up and down when Auburn's Chris Davis returned the missed field goal 108 yards for the game winning score as time expired.  Insane.  Auburn is definitely destiny's child this college football season.

Friday, November 29, 2013

Taiwanese Animators Do A Perfect 2013 Iron Bowl Preview

I'm sorry but I laughed out loud at the Auburn fans and AJ McCarron pissing on the tree.  Too fucking funny.

Tuesday, November 26, 2013


Check out all the new official Wilson Leather NCAA Game Day football we have in stock.  These are the exact same footballs that your favorite program plays with on Saturdays in the fall.  These footballs are extremely hard to get and are limited edition and also made entirely in the USA.

Monday, November 25, 2013

Florida Gators are doing great

This picture sums up your 2013 Florida Gators football team...

On Saturday the shit hit the fan again as the once mighty Florida Gators lost at home to Georgia Southern.  A Georgia Southern team which already had 4 losses and only attempted 3 passes the whole game while completing none.  And they still lost.  How Will Muschamp still has a job right now is beyond me?  Muschamp is worse than Lane Kiffin.  Not as a human being but as a coach.  There is no good reason why Florida should be 4-7 with a blowout loss coming this weekend against rival Florida State.  Don't give me the injury excuse.  You should still be able to beat a FCS team which has 30 less scholarship players on their roster at the Swamp.  Athletic director Jeremy Foley is standing by Muschamp which is not admirable in this situation.  It's going to cost him his job too.  And while I agree college football is cyclical you don't stick with a coach who has no idea how to be a great head coach when you are at a program like Florida.

Cut the fat Florida.  Or you will continue to block your own guys while losing to programs like Georgia Southern.

Saturday, November 23, 2013

College Football Gambling Locks

Bet your mortgage, kid's college tuition, wife's car, and your soul on these games today.  These are stone cold fucking locks.  Don't question it.  Just do it.

Duke -7.5 vs Wake Forest - The line opened up at -5 for Duke and has continued to move up dramatically.  Duke is for real.  Even coming off an emotional win over Miami the Dukies are looking to lock up an ACC Championship berth.  Wake Forest on the other hand is horrible.  They have been outscored 72-3 in their least 2 outings.  Duke wins big!

Prediction: Duke 40 Wake 10

Missouri -2.5 vs Ole Miss - Doesn't matter who is behind center for the Tigers, James Franklin or Maty Mauk.  They will put at least 40 points on the Ole Miss defense.  With a SEC East Championship on the line Mizzou will leave no prisoners and blow out an overrated Rebels squad.

Prediction: Mizzou 49 Ole Miss 28

Baylor -9.5 vs Okie State - Baylor is the real deal folks.  Bryce Petty and the high powered Baylor offense average over 60 points a game!  The Cowboys come in hot and at Stillwater with GameDay there should play a spirited game.  But Baylor is just too much for them to handle.

Prediction: Baylor 58 Oklahoma State 24

Wisconsin -15 vs Minnesota - The Badgers are going to run all over the Gophers.  Don't be worried about the huge spread.  Wisconsin is coming off a 51-3 pasting of Indiana last week.  The Hoosiers in my mind are on a level playing field as the Gophers so I expect another blowout.

Prediction: Wisconsin 49  Minnesota 17

Iowa -6.5 vs Michigan - Iowa had a bye week to prepare for a Wolverines team struggling big time.  With Ohio State looming next week I expect the Wolverines to sleep walk through this game.

Prediction: Iowa 28 Michigan 10

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Not Looking Good For Jameis Winston and FSU

This full statement from the alleged rape victim does not look good for the accused Jameis Winston and the Tallahassee Police Department.  As for the timing of all this, well, we know one guy who doesn't mind...

Sports Illustrated Puts AJ McCarron On The Cover and Asks If He is One of the Best Ever?

Bravo to Sports Illustrated for stirring the pot with this AJ McCarron cover.  "King Crimson" as SI prefers to call McCarron which I have never heard of or thought of asks a simple question: "Is it time to think about AJ as one of the best ever?"

Simple answer: NO.  Hell no.

With the exception of the LSU game last year in which he led a spirited 4th quarter comeback and one could argue he was horrible for the first three quarters but managed to get the ball into TJ Yeldon's hands at the right time "King Crimson" has never had to put a team on his back.  Never once.

What makes McCarron so good is not his arm, his legs, or even his decision making.  It's his supporting cast.  He literally has NFL ELITE talent all around him.  I'm not talking decent NFL prospects who could maybe make it in the NFL.  He literally has 5 offensive linemen who will all play significant minutes in the NFL who protect him.  I witnessed in person McCarron destroy Notre Dame last year in the BCS Championship.  Yes he made some great passes but he hardly got touched thanks to what is probably the greatest offensive line ever in college and Eddie Lacy running over and around ND defenders.

I'm not here to shit all over McCarron.  The kid is a good quarterback.  But he is not one of the best ever.  He will probably get his third National Title ring this January which is in itself an amazing accomplishment but let's stop right away with the greatest talk.  Nick Saban can be talked about as one of the best ever.

No one even bothers bringing up McCarron's name when it comes to the Heisman Trophy.  Which the last time I checked is suppose to go to the "most outstanding player in the country."  Why is McCarron not mentioned?  Because it's not worth the argument.

Johnny Manziel and Jameis Winston are younger with less talent around them and they still blow away McCarron when it comes to elite quarterback talent.  Right now I wouldn't even put McCarron in my top 5 QB's in the nation despite him being a senior and his resume of two titles.  Oregon's Marcus Mariota and Baylor's Bryce Petty are having better seasons and getting more Heisman pub.  Louisville's Teddy Bridgewater and Fresno's Derek Carr are better talents than McCarron.  Just because McCarron plays on some great teams like a Gino Torretta, a Chris Weinke, a Ken Dorsey, or even a Matt Leinart does not make him a "best ever" worthy player.

But let's not continue to shit all over the McCarron name.  It's not worth it.  Because the only thing best in his family is his mom's rack.  And no one, I mean no one, can argue about Dee Dee Bonner's greatness.

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Foot Locker Wins The Greatest Commercial of the Year Award With This "All is Right" Spoof

Dennis Rodman one way trip to North Korea?  One can only imagine.

Mike Tyson returning Evander Holyfield's ear?  Makes sense.

Craig Sager burning his awful wardrobe?  A dream come true.

Foot Locker hit a walk-off grand slam with this classic "All is Right" commercial.  I haven't stepped foot in one of their stores in years but after seeing this great commercial I might acknowledge their existence the next time I'm strolling through the mall while MILF watching.

Michigan State Spartans Schutt XP Chrome Helmets For Sale

You got to love the CHROME!  These are the brand new Michigan State Spartans Chrome Helmets made by Schutt.  We got the mini helmets, full size replica XP, and full size authentic XP helmets on our Store Page.

Sparty wore these sweet helmets this past week when they destroyed Nebraska in East Lansing.

Friday, November 15, 2013

Stevie Has Been Absolutely Hilarious This Season on Eastbound and Down

Stevie and Kenny Powers gotta have their FIXINGS!  Taters N Tits is such a genius move.  It's like the creator of SnapChat who just turned down $3 billion.  I mean who wants $3 billion when you can hold out for so much more.  Pure genius right?

Anywho Stevie has been fucking spot on all season on Eastbound and Down.  The contacts and fake chin just add to his mystique.  Stevie is basically the Scottie Pippen to Kenny Power's Michael Jordan.  The Lou Gehrig of his generation you could say.  Stevie is under the radar fucking hysterical.  Because make no mistake Eastbound and Down isn't winning without Stevie.  But even Stevie the loser he is portrayed to be can only take so much from Kenny...

Here are some more highlights of Stevie Janowski....Season 4 MVP no doubt.

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

I Wonder What Michael Jordan Thinks of Maple Jordan Andrew Wiggins

There is your answer.  His airness Michael Jordan is more worried about beer pong than Andrew Wiggins.  Wiggins aka "Maple Jordan" was spectacular last night in his first prime time TV performance vs Duke.  Maple Jordan was 9-for-15 from the field while scoring 22 points and grabbing 8 rebounds.  Kansas held on to beat Duke 94-83 despite another elite freshman superstar named Jabari Parker going off for Duke with 27 points.

With Wiggins, Parker, Julius Randle of Kentucky, Wayne Selden of Kansas, and Aaron Gordon of Arizona all making huge impacts as freshmen I honestly can't think of a class more exciting than this one in recent basketball history.

Maybe now we will actually pay attention to college basketball before college football is over.  This season at least appears worth it.  Tons of legit diaper dandies and 5-6 upper echelon programs with shots at the National Title.

Picture via TheBigLead

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

For Some Reason The Braves Didn't Tell Dan Uggla Of The Impending Move

No idea why.  Apparently BJ Upton missed the memo too.

Monday, November 11, 2013

Steve Spurrier Will Replace Will Muschamp At Florida Soon

The uber talented Florida Gators now have a gravely record of 4-5 after suffering their 4th straight loss, this time to Vanderbilt.  Fucking Vandy crushed them.  Head coach Will Muschamp has to be gone.  Best case scenario is they go 5-7 because there is no way they beat South Carolina or FSU to finish the season.  Which leads us to Spurrier.  He's coming for you Muschump.  He wants your soul.  He needs it.  He feeds off it.  Dead man walking in Gainesville.

Is Florida even a top 10 team in the SEC?  I can make a good argument they are not.  Back in the day you couldn't find more than 3 teams in the whole nation better than the Gators.  Now they aren't even top 10 in their own conference.  Fucking pathetic.

1. Alabama
2. Mizzou
3. Auburn
4. Texas A&M
5. South Carolina
6. LSU
7. Ole Miss
8. Vanderbilt
9. Georgia
10. Tennessee
11. Florida
12. Mississippi State
13. Kentucky
14. Arkansas

Atlanta Braves Announce Shocking Move To Cobb Galleria/Cumberland Mall Area

First initial reaction: Holy Shit.

Second reaction: I love it.

I've been an Atlanta Braves fan since my family moved down south from Maryland back in the early 80's.  I used to go to games in the old Fulton County Stadium when there were only a couple of thousand people in attendance.  I've also been to sold out games there in the early 90's and have enjoyed games at the Ted since 1997.  But the game day atmosphere and surrounding area is fucking horrible.  I'm sorry to burst your bubbles fellow Braves fan but it just is.  Go to Camden Yards or Wrigley Field or Fenway Park or Petco Park or St. Louis or Coors Field or even San Francisco.  There is actually stuff to do around the stadium like visit a pub or a store and enjoy the game day atmosphere without fear of being mugged.  Yes even in Baltimore you are less likely to be mugged around Camden Yards than Turner Field.  This is a very smart move by the Braves.

Also since 2004 I've lived over in the Vinings/Smyrna area until recently moving to Alpharetta (two weeks ago).  The Braves will move there in 2017 and there are plenty of amenities, restaurants, and daily activities to do in the Cobb Galleria area instead of just seeing a ball game.  Attendance should go up dramatically not only because it's a new stadium but it's a lot more convenient to get to for people looking to buy season tickets.  Look the commute to the current stadium sucks.  And yes traffic all around metro Atlanta blows but I guarantee you will have a lot more people in attendance from the Kennesaw, Woodstock, Alpharetta, Roswell, East Cobb areas that are so vital to bringing in money for the Braves organization.  It's a business move for sure and it's a smart one.

It will be sort of difficult to say good bye to The Ted especially since it's only 16 years old (opened in 1997).  But there is nothing really unique or homely in regards to it currently.  Camden Yards, Wrigley, Fenway, Petco, etc all have unique features that make it feel like it's a part of history and the community.  The Ted always felt out of place in my opinion.  It was originally built as the Olympic Stadium and converted to the Braves home one year after.  It just never felt like a stadium where you could build fond family memories.  Honestly I was always worried about leaving after dark with my daughter in tote.

Now I just can't wait till 2017 to see the new stadium.  Hopefully the Braves do it up right and make it look like a Camden Yards or a Wrigley Field and not that monstrosity in South Florida. Don't make it bigger than 40K in seats and have plenty of parking around it. You got to have a designated "tailgating area" with grass and tables. Make it warm and inviting and not like a concrete jungle.  The good news if you don't want to tailgate or eat at the new ballpark you can walk from plenty of restaurants such as Cinco's, PF Changs, Hooters, Maggiano's, Stoney River, Tilted Kilt, etc.

 What are your thoughts on the Braves moving out of Atlanta?

For more info on the Braves move into a new stadium in 2017 visit their website HOMEOFTHEBRAVES.COM

Saturday, November 09, 2013

Maple Jordan Basketball Shirts Now Available For Sale!

Now available for PRE ORDER is our brand new completely original MAPLE JORDAN shirt!  This soft Hanes Blend 50/50 cotton polyester t-shirt comes in royal blue with white and red screenprinted graphics on the front and back.  This shirt is sure to be the hottest thing on the court this basketball season!

A portion of all sales goes to the American Cancer Society.

Shipping starts November 13th.

ORDER HERE TODAY!  Limited edition shirt.

Wednesday, November 06, 2013

Some New Custom and Rare Notre Dame and Oregon Helmets In Our Store

We got a couple of new items in stock.  The first one is the new Schutt Notre Dame Authentic Full Size  XP helmets with the new gold.  They also have the brand new metallic gold facemask.  These are the same helmets the players wear.  Comes with the same padding inside, chinstrap and has the American Flag sticker on the back.  

Also we got the 2013 Shamrock Series desk caddy.  These are just like the regular Shamrock Series mini helmets but they have containers on top to put utensils, pens and business cards.  This is a very cool item perfect for any desk or office.

Also in stock is the new Oregon Lightning Mini Helmet.  Very sharp looking and a perfect present for the upcoming holidays.

Last but certainly not least is the Oregon Liquidmetal Mini Helmet.  They don't get much cooler than this mini helmet.

Be sure to check out our STORE PAGE for other great items.  With Christmas right around the corner is your one stop shop for the hard-to-get fan.

Tuesday, November 05, 2013


We are finally back!  We had to move the SportsCrack headquarters up to the burbs and in the meantime AT&T U-Verse kept throwing us devastating Navy chop blocks to the back of our legs with delays reaching a month for service.  So we threw a hail mary over to Comcast and the fuckers came down with the catch.  Thank God.  I started questioning my own sexuality being in the dark so long.  I felt like I was in solitary coming off a heroin addiction.  You question everything in life when you don't have cable or internet for over two weeks.  I wouldn't wish it on my worse enemy.  Actually I would.  Michigan you can have it.

Anyways I'm starting to catch up with my college football.  I missed a couple of key games but I managed to read up on them.  Here are my top 10 teams.

1.  Bama - Until the champ goes down you have to put them up at the top.  I know people are already starting to bitch and moan about their schedule being too easy but it really it isn't.  It's just that Bama is that fucking good.  They get LSU this week which should give them their biggest challenge yet.

2.  Oregon - The Ducks were off last week to prepare for their HUGE Thursday night game vs Stanford.  Last year the Nerds beat them 17-14 in Eugene on their way to a PAC-12 Championship.  This year Scoregon will be looking to get some revenge in Palo Alto.

3.  FSU - Famous Jameis and the Semenholes look like the FSU of old.  They got their swagger back and have run over two...clears throat..."Top 10" teams in convincing fashion.  I don't see them losing another game this season unless Winston gets hurt.  Yes, the Seminoles are back.

4.  Ohio State - Urban Meyer still has not lost a game in Columbus and he probably won't all season.  The only problem is their schedule is the fattest piece of cake you will ever consume for a major BCS conference team.  They are going to need a lot of help to leap into the top 2 of the BCS Standings.

5.  Baylor - The Bears are my Cinderella team.  I'm pulling for them big time.  I couldn't even tell you where Baylor is located on the map of Texas but I do know their offense is right up there with the best in the nation behind the gun slinger Bryce Petty.  They get Oklahoma this Thursday.  Win it and there is a great chance they leapfrog Ohio State in the standings.

6.  Stanford - I still can't believe this team lost to fucking Utah.  The Utes?  Good lord.  They had one bad game and still had a chance to win it so I got them up in the rankings as the best one-loss team.  They get a chance to defend their PAC-12 title this Thursday with Marcus Mariota and Oregon coming into Palo Alto.

7.  Missouri - Mizzou is right there with Stanford in my opinion.  They had no business losing to South Carolina.  They fucking choked.  Still kills me because I was hoping to see two undefeated teams battle in the SEC Championship for a right to the BCS Title.  The Tigers did bounce back big time last week with a convincing win vs Tennessee.  They should destroy Kentucky on Saturday.

8.  Auburn - Besides Mizzou these Tigers are the biggest surprise in the SEC.  Last year they struggled to go 3-9.  This year they are sitting at 8-1 with winnable games vs Tennessee and Georgia before the Iron Bowl.  Head coach Gus Malzahn has done a remarkable job.

9.  Michigan State - They held Michigan to -48 yards.  Hilarious.  The nation's most stout defense has only one loss on their resume (tough road game at Notre Dame) and are sitting in a great spot to win the "Legends" division of the Big Ten and face Ohio State in the championship game.  Could they somehow squeeze into the National Title discussion?  No but it is fun watching them dominate teams with their defense.

10.  Texas A&M - Yes I know they got two losses but both of the games they could have won.  I also think they would destroy Miami and Clemson so I can't honestly put those teams over the Aggies in the rankings despite have one less loss.  Johnny Football can sign off on this ranking.

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Cam McDaniel Doesn't Care About USC, Is Extremely Photogenic

Cam McDaniel is a fucking boss.  No helmet while fighting for yards against hated rival USC and he still has the time to pull off Blue Steel.  That McDaniel is so hot right now!

Triumph Visits The Great American Beer Festival

I love that puppet dog.  He can drink and lick his balls with me any day.

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

This Andy Reid Kool-Aid Gif is Perfect

Hilarious.  The Kansas City Chiefs are now 7-0 after only winning 2 games last season.  New head coach Andy Reid is a rock star.

Monday, October 21, 2013

Watch Out SEC Country it's the new MAUK U Shirt

There is a new beast of the east and it hunts not only west of the Mississippi but has been known to kill Dawgs and Gators with their old man football.  The experts didn't think they could survive in the SEC...well MAUK U!  Get the original MAUK U shirt only at

Taking pre orders NOW.  Shipping starts October 25th on this limited edition shirt.  10% of all sales goes to the American Cancer Society.

In Honor of Jim Leyland Stepping Down Today as the Tigers Manager We Present This Classic Barry Bonds Confrontation

Old fucking school.  Winstons and Marlboros just chewing out Barry Bonds self entitled ass during spring training back in the early 90's.  Jim Leyland packed up his cigarettes and headed out of Detroit today and he will be missed.  The funny thing is if this happened today Leyland would have been crucified by the media and made to apologize for being a racist.  True story.  Also we would be talking about changing the name of the Pirates because Bob Costas got offended for Captain Hook.

Eight Team Playoff Would Look Like This

Ok so this is all hypothetical and I know the college football lords have only agreed to a 4-team playoff starting next year but this is what I envision as the perfect playoff system that would rival Super Bowl interest. 8 teams determined by the college playoff committee.

Now just going by BCS Standings this is what the first round match ups would look like:

1. Alabama vs 8. Baylor - Could Bama be on upset alert?  Nick Saban would have a hard time stopping Baylor's spread offense which averages an incredible 65 points a game.  Bama's defense has only given up 1 TD in the last 5 games.

2. FSU vs 7. Miami - These two rivals would be a complete mismatch in my opinion.  I just can't see Miami beating FSU this year.  Jameis Winston would have a field day vs a suspect Hurricanes defense.

3. Oregon vs 6. Stanford - Another rivalry game between conference opponents.  Stanford knows how to stop Oregon.  This would be another fun game to watch.

4. Ohio State vs 5. Missouri - The Big Ten vs the SEC.  For bragging rights.  Braxton Miller vs Maty Mauk.  The Buckeyes 25-game winning streak on the line vs a big bad SEC team.  Both conference fan bases would love for this game to happen.

Could you imagine the ratings for these games?  It would be through the roof.  Better than the NFL Playoffs in my opinion.  You could have Bama vs Baylor in the Cotton Bowl.  FSU vs Miami in the Orange Bowl.  Oregon vs Stanford in the Rose Bowl.  And Ohio State vs Missouri in the Fiesta Bowl. The winners go on to play semifinal games in New Orleans and Atlanta.  Final Championship game could be in Indianapolis or Houston.  It would be epic and it needs to happen.  4-team playoff is cool but an 8-team playoff would be the shit.

Bill Murray Body Slams Lee Corso on College GameDay Set

Well so much for another "game of the century" moment on Saturday night.  Jameis Winston and FSU came into Clemson in a hostile environment and absolutely beat the living shit out of them 51-14.  With the win Famous Jameis is your leading Heisman Trophy contender and FSU makes the big jump up to #2 in the BCS Standings.  This looked like the FSU of old.  They have their swagger back.

Anyways Bill Murray got a little frustrated with Lee Corso's FSU pick Saturday morning and pulled out some old school WWF wrestling moves on the old man.  Corso got the last laugh Saturday night.  Now leave it up to some liberal media d-bags to complain about the savagery of the Seminoles tribe portrayed by the white man here.  Where is Bob Costas when we need his unnecessary and uniformed opinion?

Thursday, October 17, 2013

Ole Miss Girl in Red Dress Remix

HOTTY TODDY INDEED!  Ole Miss does it right!  She's definite marriage material there fellas....and divorce two years later.

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

College Football Midseason Awards, All-American Team, and Heisman Contenders

We are unofficially at the midseason part of college football so I thought it would be prudent for us to give out some awards.  Now these are NOT your typical college awards.  No douchiest frat boy or sluttiest sorority girl award will be given away here at SportsCrack.  Sorry fellas.  This is college football.  The only religion that actually matters on Saturday.




COACH OF THE YEAR - Art Briles, Baylor


MOST DISAPPOINTING PLAYER - Jadeveon Clowney, South Carolina

TRUE FRESHMAN OF THE YEAR - Vernon Hargreaves, Florida




BEST GAME SO FAR - Georgia 44, LSU 41



BCS TITLE GAME PICK - Alabama vs Oregon


QB Johnny Manziel, Texas A&M
RB Lache Seastrunk, Baylor
RB Bishop Sankey, Washington
WR Odell Beckham, LSU
WR Mike Evans, Texas A&M
WR Jared Abbrederis, Wisconsin
TE Troy Niklas, Notre Dame
OT Taylor Lewan, Michigan
OT Jake Matthews, Texas A&M
OG Cyril Richardson, Baylor
OG David Yankey, Stanford
C Hroniss Grasu, Oregon

DE Michael Sam, Missouri
DE Vic Beasley, Clemson
DT Aaron Donald, Pittsburgh
DT Derrick Hopkins, Virginia Tech
LB Kyle Van Noy, BYU
LB Anthony Barr, UCLA
LB CJ Mosley, Alabama
CB Blake Countess, Michigan
CB Vernon Hargreaves, Florida
S Ed Reynolds, Stanford
S Vinnie Sunseri, Alabama

K Mike Hunnicutt, Oklahoma
P Zac Murphy, Miami (OH)
KR Ty Montgomery, Stanford
PR Kevonte Martin-Manley, Iowa

1. Johnny Manziel, Texas A&M
2. Marcus Mariota, Oregon
3. Jameis Winston, FSU
4. Tajh Boyd, Clemson
5. Bryce Petty, Baylor

1. Oregon
2. Alabama
3. Clemson
4. Baylor
5. FSU
6. Texas A&M
8. Ohio State
9. LSU
10. South Carolina

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

The Battle of Bristol Announced Between Tennessee and Virginia Tech

160,000 fans?  Holy shit.  This is going to be epic.  Unfortunately it's going to be a snoozer of a game between two programs who's better days are way behind them.  Tennessee hasn't been good since Phil Fulmer was winning Cups in Knoxville.  Virginia Tech hasn't been a national title contender since Michael Vick was electrocuting puppies for sport.  But forget about the game itself.  The tailgating should be out of this world.  And really it's the only reason to attend the event.  Granted Tennessee and Va Tech could rebound by 2016.  But this video makes it look like a clash between Alabama and Oregon.  Clearly it is not.  Bristol, TN is not that far away from Atlanta.  I've sworn to my grave I would never attend a NASCAR event but this is different.  It's college football inside a left turn only speedway.  I would think it would be on par with attending Preakness.  Beer will be flowing.  Fuck it I'm in!

Yasiel Puig Does An Incredible Bat Flip To Break Slump

You know Brian McCann, Freddie Freeman, and the rest of the Braves were yelling profanities at their flat screens when Yasiel Puig hit this triple.  This Puig bat flip was beautiful.  Perfect form.  I give it a solid 9.5.  Too bad Puig thought it was a jack and then kind of looked stupid just staring at the ball as it hit the right field fence.  He still legged out a triple and finally broke out of his 0-for-11 skid in the NLCS with flair.  If Puig worked at Chotchkie's he would have at least 37 pieces of flair.

Friday, October 11, 2013

Oregon Cheerleaders To Wear Scary As Shit Custom Contacts Tomorrow For GameDay

Yeah I'm definitely going to be having nightmares about these stupid ass contacts the Oregon Cheerleaders are wearing tomorrow.  Why mess with a great thing?  I know it's Halloween month but WTF?  The only thing they need to be showing is their "O" face.  I'm not saying Oregon is going to lose now to Washington but I am saying they will most definitely not win because some asshole thought it would be a good idea to mess with these girl's eyes.