JAY CUTLER LOST HIS TAMPONS

The ongoing saga that is Jay Cutler, vaginal secretion quarterback of the Denver Broncos, took the worst possible turn this weekend when he met face-to-face with new head coach Josh McDaniels for the first time. The meeting was to clear the air between the two but it did just the opposite. Cutler had his feelings hurt when less than a month ago he found out McDaniels was taking calls for trade scenarios to ship out Cutler and perhaps bring in Matt Cassel. Of course nothing came about as Cassel, who McDaniels coached in New England as their offensive coordinator, was traded to Kansas City for a future career in obscurity. Cutler still remained the clear franchise player for the Broncos but his enormous ego was shattered.

So what has he done since? He has bitched and moaned to the press about the situation. He feels like he has been disrespected by McDaniels. This coming from a QB who has a losing record in the NFL and has yet to lead his team to one playoff victory and has yet to really prove anything that he deserves the respect he feels is owed to him. Here is what Cutler had to say about his meeting with McDaniels...

"I went in there with every intention of solving the issue, being a Bronco, moving forward as a Bronco," Cutler said. "We weren't in there but about 20 minutes, [McDaniels] did most of the talking and as far as I'm concerned, he made it clear he wants his own guy. He admitted he wanted Matt Cassel because he said he has raised him up from the ground as a quarterback. He said he wasn't sorry about it. He made it clear that he could still entertain trading me because, as he put it, he'll do whatever he feels is in the best interest of the organization.

"At the end of the meeting, he wasn't like, 'Jay, I want you as our quarterback, you're our guy.' It felt like the opposite. He basically said that I needed to tell him if we can't work this out, to let him know," Cutler added. "I thought he was antagonizing me and that was disappointing because I was ready to move on, committed as a Bronco. Really, I figured we'd hash things out, shake hands, laugh a little and move forward. What happened [Saturday] was the last thing I expected. If I didn't think it could be fixed, I never would have come back to Denver. It was painfully obvious to me and Bus [Cook, his agent] it's not something they want to fix."

So now Cutler has told his agent to formally request a trade and informed the team he will not be reporting for the first team meeting today. Sounds like a great leader right? Someone you want in the trenches with you like a Tom Brady or a Peyton Manning. Oh wait, those guys are proven winners with rings on their fingers and girls wanting to suck their junk. Cutler just has an enormous paycheck and an even bigger ego that requires a huge cotton ball with a very long string to soak it all up.

Where do the Broncos and Cutler go from here? It looks pretty obvious that Cutler's days as Denver quarterback are over. He needs to be traded and should be. He is too big of a distraction in Denver. That being said Cutler is a talented QB who could develop into a Hall of Fame signal caller in the right situation. Remember that John Elway, the greatest Bronco of them all, had a big ego also and forced his trade from the Baltimore Colts to the Broncos shortly after being drafted. Same with Eli Manning. Brett Favre wore out his welcome in Green Bay despite a Hall of Fame career. The Broncos are going to want to get another QB in return for Cutler. They aren't going to just trade him for draft picks. He is a 25 year old QB who has a ton of commodity around the league.

I think a trade that would make the most sense is to the Cleveland Browns for Brady Quinn. Cleveland's new coach Eric Mangini is looking for a guy who can chuck the ball down the field. There is no doubt Cutler is that type of player. The kid has an incredible arm. McDaniels is looking for a QB who can control the game, make the right reads, and distribute the ball for intermediate gains while not forcing turnovers. Brady Quinn is that type of player. Both Quinn and Cutler are franchise NFL QB's. But what Quinn has is more maturity and leadership. Cutler is the more talented of the two. The trade makes a lot of sense for both clubs right now.

And as far as I know they still sell Tampax in Cleveland. They didn't stop distribution once Kellen Winslow left town. It's too bad Cutler won't get to hang out with any of his Denver celebrity friends anymore like Stan and Kyle...

NICK THE STICK SHIRT

Our newest Sportscrack Tee just in time for baseball season is our "Nick the Stick" shirt. In homage of the Baltimore Orioles Nick Markakis we designed this trademarked shirt with a distressed pattern to give it a vintage look and feel. For only $17 you can get the one and only "Nick the Stick" shirt.

CHARLIE WEIS AND BILL BELICHICK ROCKING OUT WITH BON JOVI

It's the perfect song for Notre Dame coach Charlie Weis. If he doesn't win a minimum of 11 games next season after these past two shit seasons then he will be wanted "Dead or Alive!" Don't get me wrong. I like Charlie and I want him to succeed. But I like winning more.

I got to admit I'm not a Bon Jovi fan but the guy can still still sing. It's kind of amazing he can do that while not feathering his hair.

Video HT: Barstool Sports

JONAS BROTHERS DON'T WANT TO WEAR PURITY RINGS

This is what happens when a no talent ass clown band like the Jonas Brothers decide they want to go do things on their own...


Never cross the Mouse. Disney is just a front for the American Mafia.

THIS GUY WILL BE THE BEST RECEIVER IN THE NFL DRAFT

I'm talking about Darrius Heyward-Bey out of the University of Maryland. The 6'3 receiver looks as conditioned as Terrell Owens and has 4.3 speed which is on pace with Randy Moss. Everybody wants to talk about Michael Crabtree, Jeremy Maclin, and Percy Harvin as the best receivers in this NFL Draft but I believe Heyward-Bey will be the best of them. He flew underneath the radar so to speak in College Park because he wasn't catching balls from Heisman Trophy contenders or playing on a top 20 team. Heyward-Bey had the fastest time in the combine last month and most draft experts think he could get drafted late first round, possibly landing in the second round. It would be an absolute steal if a team like the Baltimore Ravens or the Pittsburgh Steelers got this kid. The Silver Spring, MD product relishes the chance of his hometown Ravens taking him with the 26th pick, whom they are bring in QB Joe Flacco to work drills with him at his pro workout...

"That will be great," he said after delivering a strong performance in position drills. Flacco "went to Delaware and did a great job last year. I could go there and be a weapon for them. We could grow together ... write that."

The Ravens have a need at receiver to team up with veteran Derrick Mason and emerging Mark Clayton. Heyward-Bey would be a good compliment as he can stretch the field with his blazing speed on the deep routes. And we all know Flacco throws a pretty and long deep ball.

ERIK BEDARD HAS A SORE BUTT

Seattle Mariners starting pitcher Erik Bedard was scratched from his Wednesday spring training start because of a....sore ass! Seriously, Bedard sat on the bench yesterday because he had a sore butt according to new coach Don Wakamatsu...

"Right now we're not concerned because it's not in the hip joint; it's more in the muscle," manager Don Wakamatsu said Wednesday. "I think it's just really about being on the mound again. This is more muscle soreness. He had some stiffness in there about four days ago, and we thought it was best at this point to rest it a little bit. It might be a blessing to get his arm a little bit of a break, too."

Apparently Bedard has been suffering from an allergic reaction to Vagisil. It has been known to cause a sore butt especially when you put it in the wrong hole as Bedard did the other day.

And to think the Orioles got Adam Jones, Chris Tillman, and George Sherrill from the Mariners for Bedard last season....hahahahaha.....

EBAY AUCTIONS ENDING SOON, SHIRTS START AT $5

Head over to our EBAY Page to check out some great deals on some Sportscrack Tees that are starting at just $5.

Some of the shirts we have include the PUKE Shirt...


The A-Roids shirt...


The Yankees Suck shirt...


And many more including the Hebrew Hammer, Bruce Almighty, and Phucking Phantastic 2008 World Champs tees.

EBAY PAGE CLICK HERE

BLACK FRIEND FINDER

I think this service would work wonders in a city like Boston. I drove up to Boston 5 years ago to catch a game at Fenway Park, stopping in Baltimore on the way. Growing up in the Atlanta and Baltimore areas you are used to seeing a lot of black people. When I walked around Boston I was completely shocked. I think I saw maybe 2 black people the whole time I was there. And one of them was second baseman Pokey Reese. I'm not shitting you. I don't know why but black people must hate Boston. Or maybe Boston hates black people. Who knows? What I do know though is they could use a black friend finder. If you don't believe me or think I'm being overtly racist turn on a Boston Celtics home game. Besides the players and the coach you don't see many black people. Now compare it to an Atlanta Hawks home game.

Different worlds my friends. Different worlds.

MARION BARBER CAN BE MY DRINKING BUDDY ANYDAY

I just read this little mention of an athlete enjoying drinks in NYC via The New York Daily News...

Dallas Cowboys running back Marion Barber racking up a $14K bar tab at M2 —and thanking the waitresses with a $3K tip.

Dude, seriously? I just spit out my Natty Light from shock. 14 grand in booze! Fuck me. And I thought I was an alcoholic racking up a $200 bill at the bowling alley the other day. You should give me a call Barber. I promise I will buy the first drink. The next 200 are on you.

PHILADELPHIA EAGLES TEAM NERD/USHER WANTS HIS JOB BACK

Do I think it is stupid to lose your job over your Facebook status? Yes.

Do I think this guy should have been fired over his creepy demeanor? Absolutely.

Obviously the Philadelphia Eagles organization couldn't fire Dan Leone because of his appearance and general awkwardness because they could be sued for discrimination. So they waited for the nerd to post something disparaging about their organization to give them the right to terminate. In hindsight the Eagles probably knew Brian Dawkins' release would cause Leone to overreact and post something negative on Facebook. And then the Eagles pounced on the situation with the quick termination before Leone could clear his Facebook status. Dawkins was a patsy.

Bravo Eagles. Bravo.

Video HT: Deadspin via MyFoxPhilly

MICHAEL VICK'S MANSION DOESN'T SELL

Who would have thought in this crummy economy a mansion which used to be owned by a famous doggy killer wouldn't sell for $3.2 million today? Completely baffling.

I'm kind of disappointed there isn't a stripper's pole, a gimp lair, or at the very least a deep well where Michael Vick dumped the dog carcasses. The place should have some history or story about it.

See, it's all about how you sell the property. And clearly the douchebag real estate agent in the video needs to know you don't sell houses without waking up the gimp.

Video Ht: WithLeather

ALL-MLB 25 AND UNDER TEAM

With temperatures hitting the 80's down here in Hotlanta I figured it was a good time to look ahead to the 2009 MLB Season. Every team is looking for a young player that they can build their franchise around and be a cornerstone not only for their team in the future but for ticket sales. So I went through every team's rosters to compile my All-MLB 25 and Under Team. To be qualified for my roster the players have to be either age 25 or younger in the 2009 season and played at least one season of MLB ball. These teams will be getting plus performances from potential superstars before they even hit their peak years.

CATCHER-Brian McCann, Atlanta Braves-The Athens native product in his first 3 full MLB seasons has already accomplished a ton by being named to 3 All-Star teams and winning 2 Silver Slugger awards. McCann might not look like as athletic as say a Joe Mauer but the kid has a great eye and is a doubles machine with the ability to hit 50 this season if he can stay healthy. McCann is also signed long term with the Braves. He signed a 6 year extension in 2007 with a club option for 2013. His pudgy face should become the new face of the franchise with Smoltz gone and Chipper's career dwindling down.

1B-Prince Fielder, Milwaukee Brewers-In 2007 Prince became the youngest player in MLB history to hit 50 home runs in a season while also winning a Silver Slugger award. With over 100 career home runs already and an on base percentage that continues to climb it is little reason why the Brewers recently signed their slugger to a 2 year extension for $18 million in January. Fielder is one of the biggest vegetarians you will ever see and if he continues to hit the ball like he has his first 3 full seasons he should be devouring an even bigger contract after the 2010 season.

2B-Dustin Pedroia, Boston Red Sox-He may be short in stature but his game is big time. Pedroia has already won a Rookie of the Year Award, Gold Glove, Silver Slugger, MVP Trophy, and World Series ring in his first 2 big league seasons. The Red Sox rewarded Pedroia this offseason with a six-year, $40.5 million contract with a club option for 2015. So like his picture above demonstates Pedroia the Destroyah can clearly buy the good hard liquor now.

SS-Hanley Ramirez, Florida Marlins-A Silver Slugger and Rookie of the Year winner, Ramirez came over from the Red Sox organization in 2005 and has done little to disappoint. Basically a younger version of Alex Rodriguez. Hanley can steal over 50 bases in a season (2006 and 2007) while also hitting over 30 home runs (2008). If he played in a major market he would be the biggest star in the game in my opinion. But he won't get that chance for a while after signing a contract for six years and $70 million in 2008. Look for huge numbers out of Hanley in 2009 and if the Marlins compete in the East he should be a MVP favorite.

3B-Evan Longoria, Tampa Bay Rays-The Rays believed in Longoria so much that they rewarded him a 6 year contract just 6 games into his career last season. Longoria didn't fail to live up to his contract numbers as he won the Rookie of the Year, got named to the All-Star team and helped the Rays make it all the way to the World Series. With 6 postseason home runs already there is little doubt Longoria will be a fan favorite for years to come in the Trop.

LF-Ryan Braun, Milwaukee Brewers-The Hebrew Hammer is just the 2nd player in MLB history to belt 30 plus home runs in his first two seasons (King Albert the other). Braun already has a Rookie of the Year award for 2007 and in 2008 finished 3rd in MVP voting after helping the Brewers reach their first postseason since 1982. Reminds me a lot of Danny Tartabull as he tends to strike out a lot and not draw as many walks as one would like but he should continue to get better as he matures. The sky is the limit for the Hebrew Hammer and Milwaukee has him wrapped up for the next 7 seasons as Braun signed a 8 year contract before the 2008 season.

CF-Matt Kemp, Los Angeles Dodgers and Jay Bruce, Cincinnati Reds-I couldn't pick just one guy here as both Kemp and Bruce have been extremely impressive in a short amount of time in the bigs. Kemp should be the everyday starting centerfielder for the Dodgers now that Andruw Jones is left flailing for curveballs in the dirt somewhere else. Kemp has 5 tool skills with the ability to go 30/30 for many years to come.

Bruce Almighty was Baseball America's #1 prospect in 2008 and looked the part when called up in Cincinnati in May. His first game he went 3 for 3 while getting on base all 5 times with 2 walks. The Reds faithful had already made him a fan favorite by chanting "Bruce Almighty" during his second game at home. Entering his second season the humble young star will need to step up his game and prove that his rookie season was no fluke.

RF-Nick Markakis, Baltimore Orioles-The Baltimore Orioles posterboy has lived up to his lofty expectations in his first 3 seasons in Charm City. Averaging over 40 doubles a season and leading all outfielders with 17 assists last season was enough to convince the Orioles to wrap up their young slugger to a 6 year contract extension this offseason. Nick the Stick should be the focal point of the offense going into his peak seasons as he enters his mid 20's. Expect huge numbers from Markakis as the Orioles are building a foundation to success with future stars such as Adam Jones, Felix Pie, Matt Wieters, Jake Arrieta, Brian Matusz, and Chris Tillman all under the age of 23.

PITCHERS-Tim Lincecum, San Francisco Giants-You know you are big time when you have your own video game commercial. Lincecum broke out in 2008 for the Giants in winning his first of what could become many Cy Young awards. With a similar build to Pedro Martinez looks can be deceiving as Lincecum relies on a two seam fastball that can hit high 90's and a devastating curveball that buckles opposing batter's knees.

Jon Lester, Boston Red Sox-Lester has accomplished a lot in his early career. He beat cancer. He beat the Rockies in the clinching game of the World Series. He has also thrown a no-hitter. And in 2008 he had his breakout season in which he won 16 games and threw over 200 innings while helping the Red Sox clinch the Wild Card. Lester should be a fixture in the Red Sox rotation for years to come and is close to signing a 6 year extension.

So did I miss anybody on the list? I only went with one right handed starting pitcher and one left handed. I didn't include any relievers because usually the best relievers are just converted starters who fail early in their major league careers. But I do really want to hear some comments from the peanut gallery about baseball and who might make this list next season.

SPORTS REPORTING CAN BE HOT

8 YEAR OLDS DUDE

One of the classic scenes in "The Big Lebowski"...


The Big Lebowski is one of my favorite movies of all-time. The first time I saw it I was a freshman in college up at Towson University and I instantly had sore ribs from laughing so hard. In fact one of my fondest memories of my backpacking trip across Europe with my buddy Andrew a few years back was getting the chance to watch it in Switzerland in a little village perched atop the Alps called Gryon. If you have never seen the film you really owe it to yourself to grow some balls and go rent the fucker.

THE NEW CITIBANK

Now that the government owns and runs parts of Citibank it looks like things will change for the bank...


Just one more thing the government can fuck up. God bless this dysfunctional country.

GRANT HILL STILL PLAYS?

I honestly had no idea that Grant Hill still played in the NBA. It goes to show you I don't follow the NBA as well as I used to. I remember back in the day when Hill had some serious hops and could dunk. Now he is just getting rejected from behind by Dwayne Wade. The old Hill would have slammed it down with authority.

Will baseball just please start already? The NBA can be exciting at times but since Jordan and Dominique retired I find myself not nearly as interested in the game. I guess you could call me a fair weather fan when it comes to hoops. But baseball and college football is where it's at for me. Just get me to those seasons and the constant talking to myself and yelling at random strangers will cease to exist.

I REALLY HATE LIVING IN GEORGIA SOMETIMES

I consider myself a mutt when it comes to conservatives and liberals. I have a little bit of both in me and can see the sides of both arguments for the most part when it comes to politics. Georgia as a whole is about as Christian conservative as they come. I tend to not get along with these people for the most part. They always want to inject religion into every conversation and down here it's part of the law. Sodomy is a jail able offense in Georgia because it is not a means to procreate. So is pulling out but whatever.

What really ticks me off about Georgia is the ban of alcohol sales on Sundays. Yes, on Sunday, the holy day as they call it down here you can not buy beer or alcohol in stores. You can still go to a restaurant or bar and be served but you can't buy a six pack at your local Publix grocery store. It's a dumb law that really makes no sense. After all Jesus was the biggest pot head, whiskey drinking person who ever lived. The guy had long hair and claimed he was God's son. Sounds like a drunk hippy to me.

Anyways, most of Georgians want to have the ability to buy alcohol on Sundays. Recent polls conducted by the Atlanta Journal have indicated more than 70% of residents think alcohol sales on Sunday should be allowed. But the Georgia lawmakers disagree with them...

The sponsor of legislation allowing voters the chance to vote on Sunday alcohol sales at stores withdrew his bill when he realized he could not get it passed out of the Senate Regulated Industries Committee Wednesday.

The committee was supposed to vote on the bill Wednesday, but supporters knew by the time the meeting began that they wouldn’t have enough votes to pass it.

It marked the third consecutive year the bill to allow Sunday sales has stalled in the Senate.

Sen. Seth Harp (R-Midland), said he would bring the bill back up in the future and supporters hinted they would make it a campaign issue next year.

So instead of collecting taxes on alcohol sales on Sundays they instead agree to not listen to the public again. The same people who vote them in. It makes absolutely no sense to ban alcohol sales on Sundays. Whatever happened to separation of church and state? The main culprit down here is Republican Governor Sonny Perdue. He is a dumb hick who has never drink had a drink in his life. Perdue believes since he doesn't do it then nobody should do it on the Sabbath. Thankfully he can't go for re-election in 2010 because he is term limited. Hopefully common sense down here in the Peach State will prevail as soon as Perdue leaves.

Ok, I will now get off of my soapbox. Sorry about that. Anybody want a beer? All this talking about alcohol is making me thirsty.

HALFTIME PRANK

Watch Prank War 7: The Half Million Dollar Shot and more funny videos on CollegeHumor

Well done sir. Well done.

Reminds me of the time my friends pulled a prank with me when I went in for a routine checkup. It wasn't warts. Only herpes.

Video Ht: WithLeather via CollegeHumor

ADIOS MARYLAND

Well, any chance of the Terps sliding into the tournament this year with their regular season record faded with this facial dunk by Wake Forest's Jeff Teague on Maryland's Senior Night...

The only way Maryland can make it to the tourney now is if they go on a magical run and win the ACC Tournament. They simply don't have the players to do it. Their point guard Vasquez is too erratic and hyperactive in my opinion. They have too many highs and way too many lows dictated on his play alone.

Video HT: FanIQ

THE MLB NETWORK IS AWESOME AND HAS F BOMBS

The MLB Network's Matt Vasgersian is pretty good at his job. So good that he likes to blurt out the F word when it comes to messing up the comparison to Fernando Valenzuela by using the name of Fernando Vina. Personally I don't care if Vasgersian uses the word and I don't think he should get reprimanded because he is on cable. When asked about the F bomb being blurted on live air Bud Selig claimed "We had no idea he said it and could find no evidence of wrong doing, this case is closed!"

By the way the MLB Network is great. They talk about all the teams and show highlights from all the games unlike those 4 letter dickheads in Bristol. If you like baseball you will love the MLB Network.

Video HT: TheBigLead

GREG PAULUS DREAM

March Madness is just around the corner bitches. Notre Dame and Maryland have been blowing ass all season so there is little chance I will be rooting for any other team besides the ones I bet on come tourney time. There is one thing for sure though. I will be rooting for Duke's opponent. Only because I hate them and their flopping homo players like Greg Paulus.

You remember Paulus as the former McDonald's All-American who passed up football to lick Coach K's mangina in Cameron Indoors. Actually you might not remember him because he never plays besides garbage time these days. Here is a good spoof of Greg Loose Anus Paulus by some Tarholes fans...


Video HT: Barstool Sports

A SHORT LOVE STORY

I know. First the gay soccer highlight and now a love story? "He must have gone two weeks in search of the perfect buttdart" is probably what you are thinking. But this is a good love story to tell your significant other tonight. Or to tell your buddies. Or your parole officer. Or mistress. I'm not judging you bastards, why judge me....

A Short Love Story

A man and a woman who had never met before,
but who were both married to other people,
found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a trans-continental train.

Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the upper berth and she in the lower.

At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and gently woke the woman saying,.......... 'Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold.'

'I have a better idea,' she replied 'Just for tonight,...... let's pretend that we're married.'

'Wow!...................... That's a great idea!', he exclaimed.

'Good,' she replied. ............'Get your own damn blanket..'


After a moment of silence, .....................he farted.

The End

Joke HT: Joe

FANCY SOCCER GOAL FROM A GUY NAMED MASCARA

It's not too often you will see a soccer post on here. The guy with the kick has a last name of Mascara so it fits the feminine side of soccer well. Almost half field when he launches the kick, the balls goes over 45 yards at an improbable angle to barely nestle in the back of the goal past the goalie's outstretched fingers. Hell of a kick I must say. Hell of a kick.

Video HT: FanIQ

QUICK THOUGHTS ON NFL FREE AGENCY

DeAngelo will continue to kiss TO's shoes in Washington.

The batshit crazy NFL free agency season launched last week and so far we have seen a ton of movement. Here are some quick thoughts on the moves so far with little research on my part. Would you expect more? I didn't think so.

ARIZONA CARDINALS-Signed Keith Lewis, S. Re-signed Ben Graham, P, and Brian St. Pierre, QB. All 3 of these signings don't mean shit. None of them are difference makers unless some how the Cardinals totally fuck up resigning Kurt Warner. Warner is looking at the 49ers and I guess the Cardinals look at St. Pierre as a possible back up to Leinart if he is starting next year. Leinart=no playoffs
ATLANTA FALCONS-Re-signed Michael Koenen p/k (f). The Falcons have lost starters Brooking, Milloy, and Foxworth so far on defense. Losing Brooking is no big deal. The guy has lost two steps and is just a pile jumper at this point of his career. Good guy, bad player. Milloy and Foxworth are both big losses in the secondary in my opinion. It looks like GM Thomas Dimitroff will address these losses through the draft or they could go after Atlanta native Jermaine Phillips from the Tampa Bay Bucs.
BALTIMORE RAVENS-Signed Domonique Foxworth, CB. Decent signing here by the Ravens. They bring a local boy back home to replace Chris McAlister. It looks like they will resign Ray Lewis now. Good for them.
BUFFALO BILLS-Signed Ryan Fitzpatrick, QB; and Geoff Hangartner, OL. I seriously have no fucking clue who these two guys are and have no reason to research it.
CAROLINA PANTHERS-Re-signed Jordan Gross, OT. Gross is one of the best offensive tackles in the game and deserved the money. His 6 year deal should keep him in Carolina black and blue for the rest of his career.
CHICAGO BEARS-Signed Frank Omiyale, OL. The Bears are hoping to catch magic with this signing of Jordan Gross's backup in Carolina. The Bears are idiots by the way. Are they ever going to address their total lack of talent at QB?
CINCINNATI BENGALS-Re-signed Darryl Blackstock, LB; Chris Crocker, S, and DeDe Dorsey, WR. The reason they are called the Bungles is because of signings like this and let T.J. who's your mama leave.
DALLAS COWBOYS-Signed Keith Brooking, LB. Have fun playing in the circus Brooking. Like I mentioned earlier, Brooking is a great guy but a bad linebacker at this point in his career.
DENVER BRONCOS-Signed Correll Buckhalter, RB; Andra Davis, LB; Brian Dawkins, S; Jabar Gaffney, WR; Andre' Goodman, CB; Renaldo Hill, S; Lonie Paxton, FS; and Darrell Reid, DT. Agreed to terms with J.J. Arrington, RB. The Broncos are clearly the most active so far in free agency. Dawkins is a great signing and should bring leadership to a bad Broncos defense. Arrington and Buckhalter should compete for carries. The question is will they trade Jay Cutler? Cutler seems to be a whiny bitch with some hurt feelings at this point complaining about stuff he has no business addressing. They should just trade him to Cleveland for Brady Quinn.
DETROIT LIONS-Signed Bryant Johnson, WR; Eric King, CB; and Maurice Morris, RB. Re-signed Jason Hanson, K; and Stephen Peterman, G. The only perfect team in the NFL last year continues to make head scratching moves. Make that ball scratching.
HOUSTON TEXANS-Signed Antonio Smith, DE; and Dan Orlovsky, QB. Re-signed Chris White, C; and Eugene Wilson, S. They way overpaid for Smith who rode a good playoff performance into an enormous contract.
INDIANAPOLIS COLTS-Re-signed Kelvin Hayden, CB; and Jeff Saturday, C. Saturday is a great player but losing Marvin Harrison will hurt. I don't care what people say, Harrison can still play.
JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS-Signed Sean Considine, S. Re-signed Brad Meester, C; and Scott Starks, CB.-For some reason I have always hated the Jaguars. Not sure why other than I hate their uniforms and their games always seem to be boring.
MIAMI DOLPHINS-Signed Joe Berger, G; Re-signed Vernon Carey, OT; Yeremiah Bell, S; and Channing Crowder, LB. Good to see Carey get the money he deserved. Their two offensive tackles are now making more money than GM loses in a day.
MINNESOTA VIKINGS-Re-signed Jim Kleinsasser, TE. Sounds like a German dish.
NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS-Signed and Chris Baker, TE; and Fred Taylor, RB. Re-signed Matt Cassel, QB (f), and traded him to Kansas City; re-signed Russ Hochstein, OL. Not sure what to make of the Cassel trade. Personally I think Cassel is overrated but it sounded like the Patriots could have gotten more than a 2nd rounder for him. The Pat's know what they are doing so I will differ my judgement till after the draft. Taylor should be a good 3rd down back.
NEW ORLEANS SAINTS-Re-signed Jon Stinchcomb, T; and Jonathan Vilma, LB. Both needed to be resigned at premium positions. I wonder what Brees mole got?
NEW YORK GIANTS-Signed Rocky Bernard, DT; Michael Boley, LB; and Chris Canty, DE. Re-signed Brandon Jacobs, RB (f); and David Carr, QB. The Giants are addressing their needs on defense with Bernard, Boley, and Canty. But they need to find a replacement for Plax and I guess the draft will remedy it.
NEW YORK JETS-Signed Bart Scott, LB. Re-signed Brandon Moore, G. Agreed to terms with Tony Richardson, FB. Bart Scott decided to follow Rex Ryan to NY and I can't blame him especially with the money he got. Should be interesting to see how good he is when not playing next to Terrell Suggs and Ray Lewis.
OAKLAND RAIDERS-Re-signed Nnamdi Asomugha, DB; and Shane Lechler, P. 3 years at $45.3 million for Asomugha? Just die already Al Davis.
PHILADELPHIA EAGLES-Signed Stacy Andrews, OT. Re-signed Joselio Hanson, CB. The Eagles have two first round draft picks and have seen Dawkins and Sheppard leave their secondary. Chances have gone up they will go secondary with at least one of the picks.
PITTSBURGH STEELERS-Re-signed Max Starks, T (f); and Chris Kemoeatu, G. Two guys resigned to help Big Ben stay upright. Makes sense.
ST. LOUIS RAMS-Signed Jason Brown, OL. Really good signing here by the Rams. Brown is a center who will help open up holes for Jackson.
SAN DIEGO CHARGERS-Re-signed Kynan Forney, G. So when are they going to trade Tomlinson and the playoff bench he sits on?
SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS-Signed Brandon Jones, WR. Re-signed Takeo Spikes, LB; Moran Norris, FB; and Allen Rossum, CB-KR. If the 49ers sign Kurt Warner then the offseason is a success.
SEATTLE SEAHAWKS-Agreed to terms with Colin Cole, DT, and T.J. Housyourmama, WR. Seahawks now have a deep play threat in T.J. who baldy should love throwing to in Seattle.
TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS-Re-signed Luke McCown, QB; and WR Michael Clayton. Screw the Succaneers.
TENNESSEE TITANS-Signed Nate Washington, WR; and Jovan Haye, DT.
Re-signed Rob Bironas, K; Justin McCareins, WR; Kerry Collins, QB; and Vincent Fuller, DB. Collins coming back means he will be the starter with Vince Young riding the pine.
WASHINGTON REDSKINS-Signed Derrick Dockery, G; and Albert Haynesworth, DT. Re-signed Ethan Albright, LS; and DeAngelo Hall, CB. The Deadskins continue to make all the offseason headlines but they overpaid for Haynesworth and most certainly are morons for giving DeAngelo anything over $2 million. DeAngelo can't cover shit. Good in zone. Terrible on man-on-man. And yet the Deadskins pay him top dollar to be a lockdown corner. Idiots. Haynesworth will get fat and stupid.

SORRY FOR THE LACK OF POSTS

I've been out of town now for over a week working with little access to no access to the computer. I've been keeping up with the sports world, such as Manny being a complete retard and turning down a ridiculous offer from the Dodgers. I promise to have more posts starting next Tuesday when I get back in town. I have a lot of players and organizations to slam starting with the Washington Redskins. It won't be pretty. DeAngelo Fucking Hall for $54 million. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

ALEXANDER OVECHKIN INCREDIBLE GOAL

Is there anything he can't do? This guy would make a great drug mule.

YOU BUYING THIS A-ROD BULLSHIT?

Call me cynical, ignorant, or just plain stupid but I'm not buying anything Alex Rodriguez is saying. I don't think he is sorry for what he did. He is just sorry that he got caught. His pause at the 5:30 mark in the video stinks of bad acting. He doesn't give a shit about his teammates. He never has. When was the last time you heard a teammate vouch for him?

The only thing A-Roids cares about is himself. Sure he acts like he cares about others but he really doesn't. This is why the guy slaps gloves in the playoffs and plays innocent. He is a cheater on and off the field. Listen, I could give two shits about his personal life and what he decides to do with it. Your infidelity to your wife should be private and doesn't concern your teammates or the public. But if you really care so much about the game and your teammates you wouldn't put them in this situation in the first place by cheating with steroids.

I'm also not buying his claim he stopped using performance enhancing drugs once he reached New York. Who you trying to fool? Yourself or the public? He admits he couldn't handle the pressure in Texas with the huge contract. He confides he felt a need for a boost to prove to others he deserved the contract. So he started using illegal shit. But now that he is playing on the biggest stage with the most attention for the New York Yankees he suddenly stops? Sounds perfectly logical to me.

The one good thing about Rodriguez is that he has admitted to his mistake. Unlike Mark McGwire, Roger Clemens, Barry Bonds, Sammy Sosa, Rafael Palmeiro and numerous others who continue to hold on to their obvious lies of never using stuff while playing. Rodriguez, despite all of his faults is one hell of a baseball player just like those other cheaters. But their numbers they put up don't mean jack. Hank Aaron is still the true homerun king and should be acknowledged for it. Bonds 7 MVP's and Clemens 7 Cy Young's have as much value as their rookie cards. It's a shame that these players among many others cheated the game that paid them so well. They cheated us, the fans. We bought the tickets and merchandise and all the other stuff that came with the fake numbers and entertainment. We believed they were playing the game the right way.

They all fooled us except maybe Bonds at first. He blew up during his mid to late 30's. They managed to make people including myself sick of the game I grew up loving. I still love the game but I don't have any sympathy for those who cheated the game and themselves. And for this the only plaque they deserve should be in the Hall of Shame.

KENNY POWERS IS MY NEW HERO

The new HBO series "Eastbound & Down" stars Danny McBride as pitcher Kenny Powers, a down and out one time superstar baseball pitcher. To say this show is funny would be an understatement. You really owe it to yourself to check it out. Here is the opening scene from Sunday's premiere...



Seeing Atlanta vs. Baltimore in the World Series is a joke in itself right now. The lines Powers spouts out throughout the show are of the good old boy nature that is pretty common down here in the South. He is essentially a funnier right handed version of John Rocker. Catch it on HBO, Sunday nights at 10:30 pm.

Video HT: MacGsWorld

ALEC BALDWIN PLAYING THE Wii

PITT TAKES DOWN UCONN

Dejuan Blair and the Pitt Panthers literally took down Hasheem Thabeet and the #1 ranked UCONN Huskies last night 76-68. Blair was nasty all night finishing with 22 points and 23 boards with a first half domination of Thabeet. The Big East is loaded with top ranked teams again this year and with Pitt's first ever win over a #1 team it could have two teams get 1 seeds in the tourney. I still think North Carolina is the best team in the country when they decide to play but Pitt is going to be tough if they can get past the sweet 16.

So if you had a vote for the best team in the country right now who would you pick? Pitt? UCONN? Oklahoma? North Carolina? March Madness is just around the corner people. Thank God!

Video HT: FanIQ

TOO MANY DICKS ON THE DANCE FLOOR

I always hated going to dance clubs during my single days. It was more or less getting dragged to some bullshit club called Vision or some other stupid dance club down in Midtown Atlanta. You always had to pay to get in the door unless you knew somebody which is bullshit and the booze was too expensive for this cheap bastard. Plus the clubs in Atlanta always had a Tokyo Drift kind of feel to them. Too much gel and Asian persuasion for my liking. Give me cold beer, Jager bombs, and a bar where I can actually go talk to girls without having to use a megaphone. Plus I'm white so I have absolutely zero dance skills. In other words I looked as retarded as Dane Cook performing "comedy."

Flight of the Conchords has a new hit song out called "Too Many Dicks on the Dance Floor" and I think this is the perfect tune for all those dance clubs that don't allow jeans, hats, or flip flops because this is usually what you find in those clubs...

THIS PICTURE REMINDS ME OF A CURB YOUR ENTHUSIASM EPISODE

I think Kobe Bryant is trying to make a point about his wife Vanessa. She doesn't seem to be taking it so well. Literally and figuratively of course...



Image HT: YBF

NATE ROBINSON DUNKS OVER DWIGHT HOWARD

VINTAGE LETTERMAN LAST NIGHT WITH JOAQUIN PHOENIX

A)Phoenix is on drugs
B)Phoenix is acting
C)Phoenix has lost it
D)Phoenix and Letterman planned the interview/sketch

You decide. I think it's a combo of all four.

LETTERMAN'S TOP 10 PHONE MESSAGES LEFT FOR A-ROIDS

I thought the digs at Michael Phelps were pretty funny. The Jeter one not so much. We all know Jeter hit that old bag up his rookie season.



GET THE A-ROIDS SHIRT HERE.

BRETT FAVRE ANNOUNCES RETIREMENT, WANTS A-ROIDS HEADLINES

I could give two shits about Brett Favre and his retirement. This is what, his 4th time he has hinted or done it? It's clear to me that Favre was extremely jealous of the headlines Alex Rodriguez was receiving for his admission to steroid use this week. He wants to be on the front of the all the New York rags and ESPN the Ocho for the next 48 hours nonstop.

In other inevitable news two months from now Favre will announce his passion is back for football and he has agreed to play for the Chicago Bears where he will again lead the league in interceptions and ass kissing from Peter King.

If you don't recall last year we were bombarded with so much Favre BS on ESPN it even got to Hitler's last nerve...

ROBERTO ALOMAR HAS FULL BLOWN AIDS?

Future Hall of Famer Roberto Alomar is facing a lawsuit from an ex-girlfriend claiming he has AIDS and had unprotected sex with her while knowing according to the New York Daily News...

Baseball great Roberto Alomar has full-blown AIDS but insisted on having unprotected sex, his ex-girlfriend charged Tuesday in a bombshell lawsuit.
The shocking claim was leveled by Ilya Dall, 31, who said she lived with the ex-Met for three years and watched in horror as his health worsened.
In papers filed in state and federal court, Dall said Alomar finally got tested in January 2006 while suffering from a cough, fatigue and shingles.
"The test results of him being HIV-positive was given to him and the plaintiff on or about Feb.6, 2006," the $15 million negligence suit says.
Nine days later, the couple went to see a disease specialist who discovered a mass in the retired second baseman's chest, the court papers say.
Alomar's skin had turned purple, he was foaming at the mouth and a spinal tap "showed he had full-blown AIDS," the suit says.

The article goes on to claim that Robbie Alomar confided to his ex he was raped when he was 17 by two Mexican men in or near New Mexico. I really don't have anything else to say other than I hope all of this is not true. We will see. AIDS isn't funny at all. Unless your name is Magic Johnson.



UPDATE: The Smoking Gun has the full complaint filed in court.

TRACY MCGRADY BLOWS

Dude, I've seen blind 4 year olds make layups better than McGrady. I've never been a big fan of McGrady and this missed layup and foul will be my lasting memory of him because I don't ever watch the Houston Rockets. That and his tears after losing in the playoffs.

Video HT: FanIQ

2009 SI SWIMSUIT COVERGIRL IS BAR REFAELI

Leonardo Dicaprio's girlfriend is the 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Cover Model. Bar Refaeli is from Israel and has a name that people call their dogs but is as far away from dog looking as possible. She isn't Elle MacPherson in my opinion but you can't blame Leonardo for snagging up this stick figure. Being a covergirl for the SI Swimsuit Issue doesn't carry as much weight as it did back in the 80's and early 90's but I guess there is still some prestige. It probably gets you better blow but who really knows. When I was a kid I enjoyed my mom's Victoria Secret's catalog a lot more. She could never figure out how her catalogs would just disappear and never come back. Sinner.

SCOTT VAN PELT GOT SUSPENDED FOR VOICING HIS OPINION ON BUD SELIG

ESPN's Scott Van Pelt was suspended for his radio show today because of what he said about Bud Selig and his $18.5 million dollar salary according to Deadspin.

I congratulate Van Pelt for voicing his opinion on Selig. I know Van Pelt (Maryland grad) works for a major corporation at ESPN and a lot of people think you shouldn't shit on somebody with as much power as Selig because his product brings in big bucks to the WWL but then what is the point of sports talk? He is hired to voice his opinion and I completely agree with him here. Selig has a house full of couches covered in plastic and it stinks. Selig is a PIMP who used to own the Milwaukee Brewers and somehow became the commissioner of a great game. He buried his head in the sand so to speak the whole time players used steroids and didn't budge against the player's union until the fucking government stepped in and Jose Canseco opened up his fat mouth. He still is too much of a pussy Nerd to step up and make the game better by balancing the competition on the field by instituting a salary cap.

And yet the guy gets paid $18.5 million to do what? Next thing you know he will be stepping down and recommending Peter Angelos for commissioner. I'm not even joking.

ALEX RODRIGUEZ ADMITS TO USING STEROIDS

A-Roid sits down with Peter Gammons and admits he used steroids from the years 2001-2003 in Texas on tonight's 6 PM SportsCenter...

"When I arrived in Texas in 2001, I felt an enormous amount of pressure. I needed to perform, and perform at a high level every day," Rodriguez told ESPN's Peter Gammons in an interview in Miami Beach, Fla. "Back then, [baseball] was a different culture. It was very loose. I was young, I was stupid, I was naïve. I wanted to prove to everyone I was worth being one of the greatest players of all time.

"I did take a banned substance. For that, I'm very sorry and deeply regretful."

"It's been a rough 15 months here for me," Rodriguez said. "I was stupid for three years. I was very, very stupid. The more honest we can all be, the quicker we can get baseball [back] to where it needs to be."

Well at least he is being honest about something. I think it is cop out though to blame the MLB culture for his own self doing steroids. Weak argument but A-Rod has always come off a weak person so I guess I can accept it. I'm hoping the names of the 103 other players who got caught comes out eventually. The public deserves to know especially when a lot of hard earned tax dollars went to uncover this whole story.

That is of course as long as no more Orioles or Braves names are on that list. Or Ken Griffey Jr. Everyone else I could give two shits about.

Get your A-Roid shirt here...

MICHAEL PHELPS SMOKES POT? REALLY?

I did find it pretty humorous how Kellogg's dropped Michael Phelps endorsement because he smokes pot. I hate to break it to Kellogg's but they do realize that our last 5 Presidents at the very least have toked some weed. It's not like this is a startling revelation that an athlete smokes weed. The NBA would cease to exist without weed. When I found out about the photo of Phelps reefing I simply shrugged my shoulders and said "Good for him!" The mofo won 12 gold medals for our country, he can smoke some pot now if he damn well pleases.

Video HT: WithLeather

NATALIE PORTMAN IS A ROLE MODEL AND GREAT RAPPER

This is the unedited SNL version of film star Natalie Portman getting her rap on while drinking and driving and smoking pole at Harvard. A lot of people think Jay Z is the #1 rapper but he ain't got nothing on Ms. Portman. Her tongue is off the hook bitches.

Video HT: WWTDD

WHAT A SWEET TEAMMATE

New Irish teammate Setanta O'hAilpin made quite an impression on his teammates balls with this kick to Cameron Cloke after he punched him during an intra-club match. It appears the Aussies and Irish don't get along very well on the same team. You know what could cure their ill tempers for each other? A bloomin onion and a Guinness. Bloody right!

$2650 FOR A BEER?

I've paid as much as $12 for a beer on the streets of Paris when I was backpacking and dished out $10 at Petco Park this past summer for a cold one and thought I was getting completely ripped off. But that is just a drop in the pint compared to what the first poured beer is going to cost at Leon’s Full Service in Decatur, GA. No worries though, apparently it's going to a good cause...

The first glass of beer poured Monday at Leon’s Full Service — the new gastropub in Decatur, will cost $2,650.

The pub owners auctioned off the first pint on eBay, and that was the highest of 56 bids, according to the Web site NextStopDecatur.com. All proceeds will benefit the fund set up for employees of the Trackside Tavern and 5th Earl Market, the two Decatur businesses that were destroyed by a fire about two weeks ago.

I feel bad for the employees and all losing their jobs because of a fire but if I am the winning bidder I want more than a fucking glass of beer for $2650. Maybe they should throw in a few lines of blow off a pub toilet seat with Jamal Anderson for shits and giggles. I laughed out loud when I read the story on Jamal Anderson. Not because I have been to Peachtree Tavern and know that that kind of shit happens everywhere in Buckhead but the fact that getting caught with cocaine is the least offensive thing Anderson has been caught doing. Let's just say the word on the street is Jam likes to the Dirty Bird at clubs like Swinging Richards. So he didn't get caught doing lines off the 20 year old guy's dugan he was with in the stall so that helps his PR case. And Kordell Stewart was taking hikes from his behind either at the time. So it's not all that bad. Also for $2650 they better be throwing in some grade A Andruw Jones hookers. I feel bad for those hookers now that Andruw has accepted a contract with the Texas Rangers. The economy is shit and now their #1 client is in Texas. This world just isn't fair. Not for $2650 for a stinkin beer.

A "TACK"Y CAL RIPKEN JR. ART PIECE

It took Baltimore Orioles fan/artist Dustin Barkley over 30 hours and 10,000 thumbtacks to make this Cal Ripken Jr. art piece. Well done sir. You pretty much nailed it. Tacked it. Sorry.

Video HT: Deadspin via Homerun Derby

A-ROIDS SHIRT

We finally got a brand new shirt to prepare for the upcoming baseball season. With Spring Training less than a week away and the shocking (not really) revelations that Alex Rodriguez failed a drug test back in 2003 for steroids we figured it was a good time to make a shirt in honor of #13 for the pinstripes. The shirts are only $17 and can be purchased at this link.

Shipping will start in about a week. Be sure to spread the word. I would love to see a stadium full of fans wearing this A-Roids shirt. It's only a matter of time before Madonna, or Gollum as I prefer to affectionately call her, is spotted in one of this killer A-Roids shirts.

PREAKNESS FANS BANNED FROM BRINGING IN ALCOHOL!

What in the holy hell is this all about?....

Say goodbye to the fraternity party atmosphere at the Preakness. Organizers are banning you from bringing your own alcohol or water onto Pimlico's infield.

Pimlico's top brass say they are trying to give the Preakness a new dimension this year. Maryland Jockey Club President Tom Chuckas says they are hoping the changes will give the Preakness Celebrations a different feel and introduce a new audience to horse racing.

But Preakness fan Matt Plummer says it could chase recurring fans away. "They expect to drink, bring their own beer and party all day."

Chuckas says beer will still be available in 16-ounce cups. But you'll have to buy it for $3.50 a cup. Water and other beverages will also be sold.

Preakness fan Mike Bauwens says, "That's going to change everything. It's expensive already."

In addition to the alcohol changes, Pimlico will add an infield concert and professional volleyball tournament to the infield party. This year's performers will include ZZ Top & Buckcherry.

The price of tickets won't change. It will still cost you $50 in advance or $60 at the door. This year's Preakness is scheduled for May 16th.

As a 4-time drunk attendee of the Preakness Stakes I have to admit this is a sad, pathetic day. The whole point of going to Preakness is bringing in your own beer and not worrying about dishing out a shitload of cash for booze. Hell, we would bring in bottles of cheap Tequila in Sprite 2 liters and make Tequila sunrises at 7 am inside the infield. Why did we do it? Because it was all we could afford as college students. Getting the tickets was a lot of money for us. This is a fucking disgrace that is all holy about Preakness. I also can't believe the tickets are that expensive. When I went a decade ago the tickets were $35 advance, $40 at the door. And the economy was fucking great back then. Now you are going to tell all these college kids they can't bring their own booze, will get charged $3.50 a beer, and the tickets are a rip off? They just royally fucked themselves on this and I can guarantee that the crowd will be cut at least into half. What a joke!

So they want a higher clientele in there is what I'm taking from all this. Fuck them and their horserace is what I say. Those uppity douchebags drinking their Mimosas and Mint Julips! This calls for a riot. No more running of the urinal races anymore...


I'm so pissed right now. I'm going to go buy a couple of 30 packs of Natty Light and drink like I did then and pass out in my front yard with piss all over myself. Why? Because it's in honor of my college years at Towson and Preakness. You didn't just drink and see random fights and fake breasts on that infield in Pimlico. You grew up if you made it out alive. You entered a boy and left a man. A really, really drunk man. What is the world coming to?




I'm going to miss the random, just flat out crazy shit that happens at Preakness...

HOW DO YOU KNOW SOMEONE'S BUTT SMELLS?

I will be the first to admit that I can release some powerful odors at ease and I bless my wife for putting up with it but I have never, ever had this happen to me...

MOM BUSTS SUPER BOWL PANTS PARTY

This is what happens when you celebrate a Steelers victory by giving your teenage girlfriend a Steely McBeam before her mom gets home from a Super Bowl party...

A woman reported Sunday night she found her daughter, 17, and a Russell man, 18, naked together in bed.

The woman returned from a Super Bowl party at 11:49 p.m. when she found the pair. She requested officers escort the man from her home. The daughter reported she and the man were at a different party where they were drinking beer. The girl said she knew he was not allowed in her house, but she invited him anyway.

The girl is facing a juvenile charge of underage consumption. The man, who had a small amount of marijuana and a marijuana pipe, was charged with underage consumption, marijuana possession and drug paraphernalia possession.

Major, and I mean major party foul by the mother here. Not only did you get your daughter in trouble with the law but you managed to embarrass the shit out of her just because you were jealous of her getting some Steely McBeam from some young hunk. She should be the one in jail for bad parenting. Hell, if this was in California and not Cleveland she would have been joining in with her daughter on same late night sexcapades.

THE CURIOUS CASE OF MATT BUSH

Some kids are born with all the talent in the world yet have a ten cent head. Matt Bush would be one of those kids. Bush was taken #1 overall in the 2004 MLB draft by his hometown San Diego Padres becoming the first high school shortstop to be taken in the top spot since Alex Rodriguez in 1993. The similarities between the two end right there.

His selection was controversial from the start as more highly regarded college players such as Stephen Drew and Jered Weaver were passed on by the Padres because of signing bonus issues. In other words Scott Boras represented both. The Padres took Bush who was a local kid out of Mission Bay High School and gave him their biggest signing bonus to date at $3.15 million. The 18 year old Bush had a ton of money in his pocket to burn and little sense of the talent he had. Less than two weeks after the draft he was involved in a fight at a nightclub in Peoria, AZ, just outside of the Padres Spring Training facility. He was accused of felony assault, disorderly conduct, misdemeanor trespassing, and alcohol consumption by a minor. In other words just a typical weekend for myself in college.

He went on to hit only .199 in 99 at-bats at Rookie level ball while adjusting to the switch from aluminum to wooden bats. The Padres expected big things out of him in 2005, his second season in minor league ball. Unfortunately he continued to struggle this time at A Ball in Ft. Worth. His .221 average over 453 at bats was clearly not living up the hype of his #1 overall draft pick status. He was invited to Spring Training in 2006 but broke his ankle and missed half the season. Now that I think about it that was right around the time I broke my ankle. Holy shit, Matt Bush wants to be a Fairchild clone. We both suck at baseball but somehow he has a lot of money. Ok, we aren't too similar.

Anyways after he broke his ankle he came back and put up a putrid .583 OPS in 2007 before the Padres decided to switch him to pitcher. Bush has a cannon for an arm and could routinely hit mid 90's on the radar gun. He was also a star pitcher for his high school team so it looked like it might work out on the mound as he fanned 16 batters in just over 7 innings of work in the Arizona League. He lasted only 7 innings when he started feeling pain in his elbow. He had a torn ligament in his right elbow and underwent Tommy John surgery which required him to miss the rest of the 2007 season and all of 2008.

So you would think with all these lumps Bush since he was drafted first overall in 2004 he might eventually wake up and realize what he has and not throw it all away. Nope. The Padres designated Bush for assignment to make room for Cliff Floyd on the 40 man roster yesterday. Essentially they released him and it wasn't because of his elbow. Bush is in trouble with the law again...

El Cajon police Lt. Steve Shakowski yesterday confirmed an investigation involving Bush and allegations of assaultive behavior and public intoxication. A witness, who requested his name not be used because of the ongoing police investigation, said Bush was drunk, threw a golf club into the dirt, picked up and threw a freshman lacrosse player and hit another one. Bush also yelled “I'm Matt (expletive) Bush,” and “(expletive) East County,” before driving over a curb in his Mercedes when leaving the campus, according to the witness.

So where this leaves Bush is up to him. He has become San Diego's baseball version of Ryan Leaf. An immature idiot who couldn't harness his talent or his destiny. Someone will pick him up no doubt because the talent is there. He doesn't have near the talent of a Josh Hamilton, another reclamation project, but if his velocity returns after rehab he could at the very least become a good bullpen arm at the Major League level. He is still only 23 years old and once you have Tommy John surgery the arm usually becomes more stronger with intensive rehab than it was before the injury. If he can manage to control his alcohol and rage issues then this curious Bush case could someday become a great comeback story as Hamilton proved after beating his demons.

RICHARD ZEDNIK HAS ELEVATION BRO

You may remember the name of Richard Zednik from nearly a year ago when he took an accidental teammates skate right to his external carotid artery. God was on his side then as well as Florida Panthers trainer Dave Zenobi quickly aided Zednik as he skated off the ice in stopping the bleeding by putting pressure on the wound. Zednik healed quickly and now apparently has been given the ability to elevate over opponents such as Brendan Witt for this impressive goal in a win over the Islanders last night. Godspeed Zednik!

Video HT: WithLeather

LANE KIFFIN ACCUSES URBAN MEYER OF RECRUITING VIOLATIONS

It looks like new Tennessee head coach Lane Kiffin is ready for a gunfight with Florida coach Urban Meyer. Speaking at recruiting celebration banquet this morning in Knoxville, Kiffin claimed Meyer committed a recruiting violation while a recruit named Nu'Keese Richardson was visiting Tennessee. Apparently Meyer kept calling Richardson while he was on his official visit at Tennessee and it's against the rules to have any contact with a recruit while they are taking official visits to other schools.

"I'm gonna turn Florida in right here in front of you," Kiffin told the crowd at the Knoxville Convention Center. "While Nu'Keese was on campus, his phone kept ringing. One of the coaches says, 'who's that?' And he said, Urban Meyer."

"I love the fact that Urban had to cheat and still didn't get him," Kiffin said.

If you thought the rivalry between the Volunteers and Gators was strong before wait till these two fan bases start slinging mud at each other. Kiffin managed to seal the deal with Richardson and get the one time commit from Florida to sign with Tennessee yesterday. The new head coach at Tennessee is already starting to make SEC people notice him and he seems to be ruffling people's feathers much like Meyer did when he first arrived in Gainesville. Usually that means he is a threat.

Click here to check out the video of Kiffin this morning speaking to the Tennessee faithful.

At first I thought the Kiffin hire was a mistake because of his lack of experience going into a high pressure situation that is Tennessee football but now I'm thinking he is the perfect hire. Recruits seem to gravitate towards him and he is already riling up a rabid fan base begging for a winner.

LITTLE PIMPIN

This little girl has better rap skills than the less talented and still alive Phoenix brother. Eminem ain't got nothing on her yo!