Mustaches everywhere will now mourn knowing one of their greatest heros besides Tom Selleck is not going to lace up the cleats anymore. Kent was not only a great second baseman who has a decent shot at Cooperstown but he also inspired millions of rednecks and guidos to grow out the prickly upper lip fuzz and display it with pride. Some guys were extremely jealous of his 70's porn stache and took it out on him. For instance Barry Bonds, who could never quite grow the proper black mustache, went after poor innocent Kent in the dugout when they were teammates in San Francisco. The envy Bond's displayed for Kent's stache was sad and yet Jeff came out looking like Clark Kent by standing up to the raging cow steroid body builder in Bonds and squashed him with his glorious follicles.
Kent would later inspire Lt. James Dangle and Junior to go into law enforcement...
You will be missed Jeffrey Franklin Kent. Well...maybe not you personally but your awesome mustache will go down in history. Today I will grow one out for you. You are a hero to mustaches everywhere.
There are two kinds of facials. One that is naughty which I can't show. And then there is the facial that Anderson University (South Carolina) guard Jarret Johnson, who is 6'3, puts on an opposing player in the open court. Facials are entertaining and usually destroy the self esteem of the person they are performed on except Ryan Seacrest. That tool has taken a ton of facials and still is chipper to this day.
As a diehard Orioles fan we have been given little to cheer about for the past decade or so but one of the players who continues to put a smile on my face is Nick Markakis. Nick the Stick is the type of player you can build a franchise around. His first 3 seasons in the Show have been impressive and you can see the progression in his game as his on base percentage continues to rise as quickly as his fanbase in Baltimore. And instead of him leaving in 3 years to go play for some other team the Orioles wrapped him up with a 6 year deal for $66 million.
Most of all this signing brings back hope for me that the Orioles are committed to building a winning franchise. With yesterday's trade for Felix Pie the O's now have a young outfield that has the potential to be one of the best in the majors for years to come. Pie will be 24 on Opening Day and was twice named the Chicago Cubs #1 prospect. He has the tools to be a great player in the American League. He will play left field next to budding superstar centerfielder Adam Jones who was acquired last year in the Erik Bedard trade. Jones has a very similar makeup to Eric Davis and at the age of 23 will just continue to get better. His defense is already great and worthy of consideration for a Gold Glove. And of course at the ripe old age of 25 is Markakis. Markakis lead all outfielders in assists with his accurate strong arm patrolling right field.
Markakis can now be the permanent face of the franchise as he will be playing the next six years in a young lineup that will also include the minor leagues #1 overall prospect in catcher Matt Wieters. Wieters is expected to have an Evan Longoria/Ryan Braun impact for Baltimore this season. They also have the holy trio of young starting power arms that scouts drool over in Jake Arrieta, Brian Matusz, and Chris Tillman all expected to make an impact in the next year or two.
This season has the potential to be a really horrible one for Baltimore with their lack of proven starting pitchers behind ace Jeremy Guthrie but the future looks bright especially with the Markakis extension. Throw in the facts that GM Andy MacPhail has upgraded international scouting and the farm system tremendously with an emphasis on young arms being developed the Orioles look like they could make a run in 2010 and beyond. They own the #5 overall pick in the 2009 MLB Draft and are projected to take another young arm in Aaron Crow who failed to sign with the Nationals last year as a top ten pick. The franchise should have another top 5 pick in 2010 also and with their commitment now to shell out the big bucks to draft picks they do take the best possible prospect on the board without the fear of not signing them.
Now all this has me leaning toward ordering the 2009 MLB package for $169 to watch the Orioles. Sure they will probably suck this year but the young guys will play and they will continue to get better. I just can't wait till the day when the Orioles beat the shit out of all those Yankees and Red Sox teams with their bandwagon fans. That will be a sweet day!
Wake Forest forward Chas McFarland got straight up body slammed by a Clemson student. Give that kid a cheerleading outfit. His school spirit is ferocious.
Now get off my lawn! Just kidding of course. Martin Luther King Jr. was a great American and stood for what was right and was not afraid to go against the norm. You have to admire a man with King's heart and his "I have a dream" speech still gives me goosebumps to this day.
But right now my dream is for this hangover to go away. Maybe a drink or ten would help. It's about consistency.
Former Notre Dame greats Bryant Young and Tim Grunhard are suppose to be announced as upcoming graduate assistants according to multiple internet sources. Young, a future NFL Hall of Famer for the San Francisco 49ers, was one of my favorite players back in the early 90's and always brought with him a tremendous work ethic to the game which hopefully will translate to his coaching abilities. The Fighting Irish have quite a few potential young superstars on the d-line including Ethan Johnson and Darius Fleming who could learn a lot from Young.
Grunhard will work with the offensive linemen and the NFL veteran was a badass center on the 1988 National Championship team. The Fighting Irish have three centers on their current roster including starter Dan Wenger and backups Braxton Cave and Mike Golic Jr. so I would presume they would get a lot of one-on-one instruction from Grunhard.
Young and Grunhard should also help with recruiting next season. It always a luxury to have coaches who are house hold names going into recruit's living rooms. With the firing of offensive line coach John Latina and defensive line coach Jappy Oliver this offseason it is apparent that Charlie Weis is coaching for his job in 2009. Young and Grunhard are welcomed additions back to the Notre Dame family and should be tremendous assets to Weis who can teach the players the proper techniques and fundamentals of line play. Hopefully they can also teach the players the proper strength conditioning so they can start pushing around teams instead of vice versa.
EAGLES OVER CARDINALS-I have a rooting interest in this game and it lies on Donovan McNabb's right arm. McNabb has had to put up with so much shit from Philly fans and the media ever since he got drafted and he has handled it all with class and dignity. I want Donovan to get his Super Bowl ring and I believe guys like Brian Dawkins and Brian Westbrook will play huge roles in a tough win over the Cardinals. Philadelphia 24 Arizona 21
STEELERS OVER RAVENS-This hard hitting AFC North rivalry game will be the third edition this season. The Steelers won the first two thanks to an incredible defense that made Joe Flacco look like the rookie he is. The Ravens are coming off a hard fought win in Tennessee and haven't had an off week since the second week of the season. They are beat up and battered and the Steelers come in fresh and rolling after destroying the Chargers last week. I want the Ravens to win but I think the Steelers have the better team and if they don't turnover the ball they should be able to handle the Ravens especially if they stop their run game. Pittsburgh 20 Baltimore 7
If you listen to the Howard Stern Show you should know all about AshleyMadison.com. It's a website designed to help adulterers meet other adulterers. Good family fun right? Well, not according to the NFL who not only rejected the commercial for the Super Bowl in two weeks but also said it could never air one during any of their NFL broadcasts.
It's great to know the NFL has their moral compass pointed in the right direction. That is until Michael Vick starts taking snaps in Oakland.
His name is Chesley Sullenberger and he was the pilot of US Airlines Flight 1549 who safely landed his plane into the Hudson River in New York after some crazy suicidal birds flew into the engines. The former US Air Force fighter pilot from California with over 40 years of flight experience goes by the name of "Sully" but in my book this guy should be named Hero and given a statue as big as the Statue of Liberty after saving all those people on board.
Sully, if you read this please note that I am flying out to Las Vegas next weekend and I would be honored to have you captain the flight. Actually I would be honored and thankful if you would captain every single flight for the rest of your life or mine.
Anyway, kudos to Sully and I'm serious about honoring this guy in New York. If you are going to honor douchebags cheaters like Danny Almonte and Jeffrey Maier you sure as hell better give this hero some recognition.
I will do a toast to you tonight Sully. This Newcastle is to you.
Obviously Pete Carroll is pissed at QB Mark Sanchez for leaving to pursue his dream of playing in the NFL because he knows with Sanchez next season they have a great shot at going undefeated. But why the crybaby routine Petey? Sanchez fulfilled his commitment to USC and himself by staying for four years and completing his degree. Yes, he could have come back for a 5th season and taken dancing classes like Matt Leinart did but we all saw what the spotlight did to Leinart during that final season. Leinart was projected to be the #1 pick in the draft going to San Francisco but instead decided to Fight On or as Reggie Bush would say Cheat On for one more season. He fell to the #10 pick and lost millions in the process.
Pete Carroll needs to show some class and congratulate Mark Sanchez for all that he has done for the program. Don't be a selfish prick and state that you didn't agree with his decision. Instead thank him for putting up with all the dead hookers you made him shove back under your desk during his freshman orientation. Sanchez made the right decision in my opinion and it's not because I'm a Notre Dame fan. Look at the quarterbacks coming out this year. Besides Matthew Stafford (If you want to see class look at the way Mark Richt handled Stafford and Knowshon leaving last week) there really isn't a quarterback coming out in this draft with top 10 potential. Sanchez does not have a lot of starts in his back pocket and so Stafford does have the upper hand in that department but NFL scouts tend to forget those things as soon as the combine starts. Sanchez could wow a lot of the NFL personnel especially a team as dumb as the Detroit Lions into taking him #1 overall. Next year he would have been competing with Sam Bradford, Colt McCoy, Tim Tebow, Zac Robinson and some other juniors such as a Jimmy Clausen for the #1 QB spot. Sure he could have beat them all out and been the #1 pick but he could also suffer a terrible injury and/or been overly scrutinized like Leinart and Brady Quinn were and drop in the draft.
The key to the draft is going in while you are hot. Sanchez had his best game of his career in destroying Penn State for four TDs in the Rose Bowl. Could you imagine if Mack Brown would have thrown a hissy fit over Vince Young deciding to leave instead of not coming back for his 5th season? The media, fans, and incoming recruits would have torn him up. But somehow Carroll will get a pass for this shit just like the whole Reggie Bush fiasco. The NCAA and the media will continue to lick and massage the filthy Trojans and Pete Carroll until their mouths are tainted cardinal and gold.
I won't be that person. Congratulations Mark Sanchez. You made the right decision for yourself.
These are tough times we are living in right now with the economy going to shit, people's houses being foreclosed on and the porn industry suffering it's biggest downfall since bestiality started hitting the shelves back in the early 80's. So I figured I would tune up my resume and present it to those poor saps who work in cubicles that spend more time on Facebook than they do on a spread sheet while counting down the seconds till 5 pm.
As you can see my work experience and people skills are not exactly stellar for future employment of any kind besides mop boy at the local Sneak a Peek booth shop...
Okay, I know what you are thinking and yes, that is not me. But it points out my lazy habits to future employers. Instead of making my own video I merely rip one off of FunnyorDie and claim it as my own. In essence the video encapsulates everything about myself without having to actually put much effort into it. One of these days I might get a "desk" job and be as miserable as all of my other friends and family who had one or currently die in one today. But right now I want to keep this Sportscrack vehicle going till it explodes or till the Feds shut me down. So if you feel like reading my worthless babble please visit the Store Page and buy a t-shirt or a helmet or a banner or even an autographed baseball or football because not only will it make you feel better about yourself but you are also getting excellent deals at way below market value for all of those items. Most if not all of the items on our store page are 25% or more below what other stores sell them for at retail value.
I also wanted to add if you are looking for an individual item that we don't sell on our store page let me know and I can see what I can do to put that particular item on our store page. An example of a request we got in the past was a Joe Namath autographed Alabama mini helmet from a good customer of ours. I looked on-line for the item and saw that most places such as Steiner Sports sold it for as much as $500. In other words they are just ripping off people. I got them for half that price at $250. The lady bought two of them. One for herself and one to sell on Ebay. Hey, you got to do what you got to do and I hold no qualms about it. So if you have any requests let me know. Email me at matt@sportscrack.com. I promise I will get back to you within the next year.
If you don't live in California or Florida right now you are experiencing the chill of the winter. To be honest it's cold as fuck in 85% of this country and we need something to warm us up especially with the doldrums of football ending soon. The Reef Girls feel our pain and do their best to warm us up in all the right spots.
-It looks like Frank Wren took my rant to heart last week. Facing the fallout over the failures to land either Peavy or Burnett and then letting Smoltzie leave to Boston it became apparent that the Atlanta Braves long offseason had become a nightmare. But in the last couple of days they have reached agreements with free agent Derek Lowe and Kenshin Kawakami. Lowe is a #1 starter and in my opinion is a great signing. Sure the Braves overpaid for him and would have been better off signing him to a 3 year contract instead of the 4 years at $60 million they wound up giving him but Lowe was a must get for the Braves pitching staff. He is good for 200 plus innings and the guy gets ground balls with his incredible sinker. Lowe's sinker is one of the hardest pitches to hit and also one of the hardest to lay off. It literally drops off the table about 6 inches from the plate making a hitter look like he was auditioning for a Cirque Du Soleil play. Plus the guy has a sweaty mullet which should be a hit in Atlanta.
Kawakami is another Japanese pitcher who I honestly haven't seen much of besides the Youtube stuff. He is the first Japanese born player to ever play for the Braves and scouts claim he can be a good 3 or 4 starter for the Braves. Of course the Braves overpaid for him too giving him a 3 year deal worth $24 million but it was essential to land a former MVP of his league as his stuff is not overpowering but his cutter and curve are graded out above average. Here is some Youtube video of him and his delivery brings back memories of David Cone...
So with the additions of starters Lowe, Kawakami and yes, even Vasquez stat nerd the Braves and Frank Wren in particular have answered the call when it comes to adding quality arms to a struggling pitching staff. Right now this is what I would predict Bobby Cox's 2009 rotation will look like: 1. Derek Lowe-Big postseason pitcher and a proven winner. 2. Javier Vasquez-Innings eater who should benefit from switch to NL. 3. Jair Jurrjens-Had a great rookie season and should continue to progress. 4. Kenshin Kawakami-Will win a ton of games as the 4th starter. 5. Tommy Hanson-I think the kid has a great spring and forces the Braves to put him into the rotation.
I still don't think the Braves can win the division with what they got but if they can add an outfield bat (Bobby Abreu or Jermaine Dye would be great additions to what looks like on paper as being the Major's worst outfield right now) they could be a good sleeper pick to at least contend for the Wild Card. It's going to depend on the pitching staff staying healthy and hitters like Francoeur and Kotchman maturing and matching up to their potential.
Rickey Henderson was officially elected to the Hall of Fame yesterday after receiving 96% of the votes in his first year of eligibility. There is no doubt that Rickey is the greatest leadoff hitter of all time and whatever voters out there who didn't vote for him should not be allowed to cast one in the future. In fact I would recommend castration because you don't deserve to fuck anything the rest of your lives if you want to fuck Rickey like that. And we all know that Rickey didn't mess around when it came to the game on the diamond. The guy talked the talk and literally walked the walk for his entire career. Henderson was one of my favorite players growing up because he stole a ton of bases. I considered myself a pretty excellent thief king myself when it came to bases during my Little League days at Wills Park and I would mimic Rickey's crouch and the way he held his batting gloves in his hands while taking huge leadoffs to get that extra base. Between Griffey's stance, Mussina's delivery, and Rickey's leadoff and steals I would say I tried to copy all of them. With that being said I don't even come close to Jimmy Rollins. He does a dead on impersonation.
By the way if you like baseball you need to check out the MLB Network. It's all baseball 24/7 and the productions so far seems to be good. And as of this moment they don't completely focus on just those two Northeast teams like ESPN does.
Ray Lewis and the Baltimore Ravens will face the Pittsburgh Steelers next week in the AFC Championship after Lewis helped lead the Ravens to a tough, defensive win over the Titans yesterday. On this play it looked like Lewis was ready to pull out the knife and take out the Titan tight end but instead decided to go for his head. The man is still alive. Those guys in Atlanta...not so much.
