Mike Floyd looked like God out there today. What a beast of an athlete he has become. I'm going to enjoy this win immensely. Watch out for the Fighting Irish this year. Their defense and offense pound people. 35-0! To Hell with Michigan coming up.
College Football is in full kickoff mode this Saturday so while you are out Tailgating like a Champion I want you to remember the little things that count: Beer, Babes, and Football. Be careful out there. You don't want to end up like this guy singing at your buddy's funeral...
This is pretty much what I'm going to sound like around 9 tomorrow night except more incoherent and a few scratches and bruises. Gotta love college football season. The crackhead singing Amazing Grace brings back memories of Eddie Murphy in the 80's BTW.
Video HT: Shaun
These parents should be arrested for child abuse for putting this kid through the nightmare that is Rich Rodriguez and Michigan. You gotta admit, the child does a hell of a Dick Rod impression. Don't worry kid, I cry also when I hear the Michigan Fight Song. Brings back awful memories of all those whores in Ann Arbor.
Video HT: Extra Mustard
I'm not going to lie, for an 80 year old, Kathy Lee ain't bad. Just saying she can get my manhood whenever she wants.
Holy shit! I hope the rest of the college football season is much better than that shit I watched last night. Both the South Carolina-NC State and Oregon-Boise State games were a collective monkey fucking a wet football classics. The only "entertainment" came at the conclusion of the Boise State 19-8 win over Oregon when the Duck's RB Legarrette Blount decided to go batshit crazy after sucker punching Boise State's Byron Hout. This was the perfect ending to a horrific game. Oregon looked gawd awful and all those fans of Jeremiah Masoli who kept emailing me about how this kid was going to be a Heisman contender should keep eating their Coco Puffs. Masoli was terrible. Actually everybody playing on the blue turf in Boise didn't deserve their scholly. But getting back to Blount, who had 17 TD's last season, is going to be suspended for at least 6 games. Hell, he might get kicked off the team. He brought back memories of Ron Artest going after fans and that surely is not going to keep you on the field of play.
When security and police have to "escort" you off the field you know that you are going to a world of hurt...
Oregon coach Chip Kelly should suspend if not completely kick off Blount. There is no excuse to act the way he did. Kelly should also let Blount kick him straight in his manbags for that horrible game plan. The new coach turned the Ducks into a passing team when we all know they should have been able to run the ball over an undersized Boise State defense. Blount is crazy no doubt but Kelly is a dumbass for not running the ball and making myself look like a complete asshole for picking the Ducks as PAC-10 sleepers. For this Kelly deserves a swift kick in the junk. This can't be argued. Blount go bye-bye for at least 6 games if not the whole season. Justice served.
Yesterday I demanded pictures of Sportscrack shirts with either famous people or in front of famous sites and my old college roommate Josh came through with both. Josh is seen sporting the 9 Tough Shamrock shirt in Moscow's Red Square with his lovely fiance Anya whom you may recognize as the #10 case model on the show Deal or No Deal. It's great to see our shirts making an impact in former Communist regimes. Hell, our shirt probably helped cause the collapse of those Commie bastards. Capitalism baby! Anywho, I just got tickets 16 rows behind the Atlanta Falcons bench to go see old #9 himself, Zibby, in action for the Baltimore Ravens at the Dome. Don't worry, I will be taping tonight's college action to make sure I covered my bets. I could really care less about the first game between NC State and South Carolina but I sure as shit don't want to miss the Boise State/Oregon clash on the blue turf tonight.
Get your 9 Tough Shamrock shirt by clicking on the picture below...
All week I haven't been able to get this song out of my head. I haven't gotten any sleep because I have been bouncing off the fucking walls like I did an 8 ball with DJ AM. But we know that can't be because the guy is fucking dead. It's all because college football is finally starting. The time bomb is ticking. Time. Bomb. Ticking. Nah nah. Now try to get it out of your head. Welcome to my world.
Tonight our long, pitiful wait for college football is finally over as we have two interesting games on the schedule with NC State vs South Carolina and Oregon visiting the Smurfs of Boise State. I'm giddy in anticipation and actually kind of shocked with the Boise State-Oregon line. As I mentioned earlier this week Oregon is my PAC-10 sleeper and as of this moment they are 5 point dogs to the Smurfs. So if you want to know what my first bet is this college football season it has to be Oregon with the +5. Jeremiah Masoli and the Oregon Ducks will be facing their highest rated road opener since 1975 when they played at #1 Oklahoma. The over/under is 66 and although I think it will be a shootout I'm taking the under.
Oregon +5
Under 66
The NC State/South Carolina looks like a snooze fest. Both of those programs have always bored me. Erin Andrews will be seen for the first time since the peeping tom video. Presumably with clothes this time. The game is in Raleigh but when it comes to ACC vs. SEC I always take the safe bet and go with the power conference. The Cocks are +5 in this game, take them. QB Stephen Garcia will be impressive when he isn't doing keg stands and Eric Norwood will have a couple of sacks.
South Carolina +5
I'm so happy college football is starting tonight I just can't hold it in anymore. Why must I cry?....
Video HT: Will
This picture was taken 9 years ago but have things really changed for the Purdon't win Boilermakers? The five offensive lineman were suppose to protect Drew Brees from his birthmark but obviously failed miserably. Holy shit, this has to be one of most gay things I have ever posted on this blog. For this I apologize. No person should have to look at a Purdue Boilermaker football player much less stare at them in black speedos.
So here is Megan Fox pant less...
Ahhh...now I feel much better about myself and my sexuality.
WithLeather has the most exciting clip in regard to yesterday's tennis action in Flushing Meadows, NY. Could they really pick a worst week to start the US Open? College Football is starting with the NFL looming, baseball playoff race is heating up and now they decide to play a tennis major? I would think more people would tune in and watch if this was in the last week on July instead of the first week of football season. Hell, what do I know? Tennis seems to be doing great despite all the tournaments moving overseas and nobody caring outside of the die hard fanatics who jerk off to the thought of Sharapova touching their forehand.
With the NFL season less than 2 weeks away it is now time to load up on some of our new NFL shirts including the Matty Ice one which has now taken over the Dome. As you can see in the picture above the Matty Ice shirt has made it all the way down to the sidelines to display their support of Matt Ryan. The NFL's Best Looking Man
even caught a glimpse of the shirt before the Falcons took on the Chargers thanks to loyal Falcon's fan Billy who displayed his pride Saturday night. Billy gets a free shirt for the picture. Thanks Billy! If anybody else wants a free shirt all you have to do is get a picture of yourself wearing it next to either a celebrity or famous person and send it in to us at matt@sportscrack.com.
Matty Ice Shirt
Right above the Linebacker Inn near the intersection of Edison Road and State Road 23 near the Notre Dame campus lies this monstrosity of a billboard. Listen, I get it that people don't like Charlie Weis after the 10-15 record he put up the last 2 years. I will be one of the first to admit that I wanted to ring his fat neck every once in a while. But what kind of asshole buys a billboard to state their opinion which will only hurt Notre Dame? It's not even funny. If DickRod saw this he would breakdown and cry. I'm not joking. Whomever paid for the billboard needs to step up and claim it as their own.
I think we found our man...
After seeing LSU's facilities yesterday I thought they would be hard to beat. Well, Phil Knight laughs maniacally at your so-called top flight facility LSU fans. Check out their crib...
It must be rough going to Oregon on a football scholarship. It would be for me because I hate Nike cross trainers. They smell like wet trash after two weeks of wear and tear. Pieces of child's tears and unsafe labor laws garbage.
Till Jeremiah Masoli and the Oregon Ducks (PAC-10 sleeper) take on BCS killer Boise State Broncos on Thursday night in what should be a shoot out. I'm taking Oregon to win the PAC-10 this year. I just can't get over USC starting a freshman quarterback and replacing all those defensive studs even though I know they are loaded with talent just ready to prove me wrong.
We are doing another year of College Football Pick Em. Go to FunOfficePools.com and sign up, pick the Sportscrack pool, and enter who you think will win this week starting with the Thursday night games. Who ever ends up with the most points at the end of the week wins a free Sportscrack shirt of their choice or you can pick any college or NFL mini helmet. The games are pick em, no spread, and you weigh the games in terms of confidence points. Last year was a success running the pool except for a couple of douchebags who bitched about their shirts not getting there within 24 hours of winning. It's free to enter, there is no spam, and you have a chance to win a free shirt. Pretty fucking sweet if you ask me. So enter now before you get drunk and forget. Hell, most of you probably drink on the job like myself so put down Grandpa's old cough medicine right now, slap yourself a couple of times, and enter those picks. Last year I believe we had over 125 people in the pool. This year I want to at least double that number so tell friends and family about it.
And in case you were wondering the Grand Prize winner at the end of the year gets one night with Kelly Brook...
I promised her family I would release her shortly after December 10th. I know, I'm such an angel.
Tears of a Clown my friends! Tears of a Clown! Dick Rod is so fucking pathetic I almost feel bad for the University of Michigan. He still brings up West Virginia in his press conference...what a fucking moron! How about you follow the rules and try to gain the respect of your players instead of displaying these crocodile tears at some bullshit press conference? I hate Michigan Football but now I just feel bad for them because Dick Rodriguez is just so embarrassing. First a 9 loss season, players transferring at record numbers to get away, players complaining about practice, and now this cry baby bull shit. Too funny if you ask me.
After watching this video of LSU Tiger's offensive guard Lyle Hitt give a tour of the Charles McClendon Practice Facility you can see why all those little southern bayou kittens pick Baton Rouge as their choice of 4-6 years of SEC football to turn into lethal Tiger machines...
If there is one team in the SEC who can beat Florida, especially in the trenches, it's LSU. The Gators travel to Baton Rouge on October 10th for a night game in what very well could determine who is still alive to play in the BCS Title game let alone the SEC Championship.
Video HT: ExtraMustard
...than 99.6% of married men. I love the laughter of the cheerleaders as they try to play it off as innocent fun.
Minnesota Twin's second baseman Alexi Casilla made this incredible flip against the Baltimore Orioles last week while I was watching the Orioles lose yet another game. After I picked up my jaw off the ground all I could do was shake my head in amazement. I've seen middle infielders use the flip but I have never seen one performed like Casilla did while diving in mid air. Casilla must have dolphin flippers. There is no other reason. It's like gay people in denial.
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