The Big Lead has this great locker room speech from former Texas Tech head coach Mike Leach after his Red Raiders team played Baylor. I love how he addresses some of the players who feel like they are entitled to something just because they won in the past. I would love to play for Mike Leach. He doesn't settle for average. He requests 100% all the time and if you are Craig James son then you can sit your ass in a fucking closet and suck your thumb till Daddy comes to the rescue. Some Athletic Director needs to hire this guy asap. Leach made Texas Tech a winner. The Red Raiders were fucking awful before Leach started throwing F bombs at players. I hope somebody in the PAC 10 grabs him so he can lay it on FUSC every year.

I hope Brian Kelly brings this type of attitude to Notre Dame. Too many players on ND's squad think they have some type of entitlement because they wear the blue and gold on Saturdays. Bull shit. You gotta earn your jersey and my sincere hope is Brian Kelly completely rips apart the team in Spring practice and makes them bleed to earn the right to wear a jersey and run out of that tunnel with passion.

EVAN TURNER PUTS FINAL NAIL INTO MICHIGAN'S COFFIN

Ohio State's Evan Turner might have just clinched Naismith Player of the Year honors with this shot. Not only does he help the Buckeyes survive a battle against their arch rival Michigan but he also keeps Ohio State in play for a #1 seed if they win the Big Ten Tournament.

Right now I got Kansas and Kentucky as the only legit #1 seeds in the tournament. Even if they lose this weekend they still get #1 seeds. No argument there. Syracuse is a big time stretch in my opinion. Losers of two straight I think if West Virginia wins the Big East tourney then they should steal the #1 seed from Cuse. The other #1 I guess will go to Duke if they win the ACC Tournament. The ACC blows balls this year.

The smart money goes on either Kansas or Kentucky winning the whole enchilada. They are clearly the most talented and both have coaches with plenty of NCAA Tourney experience. I'm a betting man so I'm taking Kansas. Cole Aldrich is a force in the paint and Sherron Collins and Xavier Henry are extremely hard to defend. Plus Calipari of Kentucky always finds a way to fuck up a sure win (like 2 years ago against Kansas).

ZACH GALIFIANAKIS KILLS THE SNL MONOLOGUE

I watch as much Saturday Night Live these days as I watch WNBA. In fact I found out both still exist recently. Good for them. Comedian Zach what's his beard absolutely killed it the other night during his monologue with some old material from his stand up days. WarmingGlow thinks it's amazing. I think it's boneriffic. Either way you are a winner after watching it.

CALLED IT IN SICK TODAY

Which is kind of weird when you work by yourself. See I don't have any co-workers per say unless you count my dogs. My dogs are like those lazy mother fuckers in the opposite cubicle next to you who just sit around and lick their balls while begging for food. It pisses me off too. Dogs are just like co-workers. I'm pretty positive co-workers love to eat their own shit and fart at the absolute worst moment. For instance the other day I tried getting to second base with a beautiful lady only to be fart blocked by one of Soco's deadly blasts. Yes, I named my dog after a liquor. And yes, I know too much Soco can give you the farts. Hence the name. Anyways, I called in sick today because I got a bad case of the broners...

Rob Corddry Has A Broner from Rob Corddry

Hey, if you are reading this blog then I feel sorry for you. If you want me to stop feeling bad for you then buy one of our cool SportsCrack shirts. For instance we are only 9 days away from St. Patrick's Day so what better shirt to wear then this new sweet ass Irish one which will surely get you laid...or arrested....

EXCLUSIVE VIDEO OF THE BEN ROETHLISBERGER ASSAULT

"I GET OLDER...THEY STAY THE SAME AGE!"

Case closed. Big Ben is fucked.

NOT A GOOD WEEK FOR QB'S IN GEORGIA WITH NAMES ENDING IN BERGER

By now you have heard about Ben Roethlisberger little sexual mishap in Milledgeville, GA (I had no fucking clue where Milledgeville was till two days ago and apparently I only live about a hour away from the city...go figure) which would make him a two strike offender in the land of forced love. What you may not know is while Big Ben high tailed it out of the Christian bible beating state of GA after pulling a Roethlisberger (it's a new noun replacing sexual assault in the dictionary) he managed to hire Atlanta's lawyer to the guilty sports stars in Ed Harland. If you don't know who Harland is well then take a look at these clients whom he represented in the past...








Harland has managed to get Ray Lewis off for murder. He got Dany Heatley off for vehicular homicide. He got Jamal Lewis the bare minimum time in jail for facilitating a cocaine deal. Garland also managed to get Pacman Jones a misdemeanor for paralyzing a bouncer at a Las Vegas strip club. The point is if you are going to kill someone or Roethlisberger a girl whether it be intentional or not then you go hire Garland. Garland is the modern day Johnny Cochran. He gets innocent until proven guilty sports stars slap on the wrists and will probably manage to get the mayor of Milledgeville to publish an apology note to Big Ben for his town's misunderstanding of the Roethlisberger rules.

In other Georgia quarterback news involving small towns we have the arrest of potential starting QB for the BullDawgs in Zach Mettenberger. Another QB with a last name ending in -berger was dumb enough to go partying in the podunk town of Remerton (seriously I have never heard of these places before and have lived in Georgia pretty much all my life) and managed to get arrested for what 95.9% of us get arrested for: being a drunk idiot. Mettenberger is expected to compete with Aaron Murray and Logan Gray in Spring Practice for the vacant starting QB job leftover by the Ginger Ninja. Actually maybe I should replace the word is with was because there is a good chance it might be a two man race after this arrest. Mettenberger was arrested while on Spring Break at a bar called Flip Flops at 1:39 AM on Sunday. Wait a second. What the fuck. A QB in the SEC is on spring break in fucking Remerton? Of all the places I have gone for spring break I believe the last place I would ever think of going is Remerton. Come to think of it Mettenberger deserved to get arrested for having bad taste. Come on man. Panama City is a short drive away. Easy girls, booze, STD's, and general lack of the po-po runs rampant down in PC. These kids have so much to learn.

PRESIDENTIAL REUNION

Funny or Die's Presidential Reunion from Will Ferrell

HA! If only it were this simple. By the way, Jim Carrey does a damn good job of mimicking Ronald Reagan. For a second there I thought I was watching "Knute Rockne All American." I really need to stop drinking bourbon in the morning.

THE JASON HEYWARD "J-HEY KID" SHIRT

This J-Hey Kid shirt was inspired from the new kid on the block down in the ATL. "The J-Hey Kid" is the #1 prospect in all of baseball and we figured he deserved his own shirt from SportsCrack Tees. If you are a Bravos fan or a baseball fan for that matter then this is the perfect tee shirt for yourself and/or girlfriend, wife, life partner, mistress, etc. I know one thing is for sure is that I will be rocking out in this "J-Hey Kid" shirt on Opening Day at The Ted when the Braves take on the Scrubs.

THE J-HEY KID SHIRT ONLY $17

SORRY DUKE YOU LOSE!

Jon Scheyer had about as much chance of blocking Maryland PF freshman Jordan Williams on the break as he does of winning the ACC Player of the Year after Maryland won 79-72. With the win Maryland PG Greivis Vasquez clinched the ACC POY award and also the Terps are now tied with Duke for the ACC lead at 12-3 with both teams having one game left before the ACC tourney. The Comcast Center was electric last night on Senior Night as Vasquez went out in style with this incredible shot with the game on the line...


Vasquez will go down as one of the all-time greats in Terps history with Juan Dixon (in attendance), Len Bias, Steve Francis, Joe Smith, and Len Elmore. His #21 jersey should be retired and hung in the rafters. The Venezuelan product is practically a cult hero in College Park and he has a legit shot of leading Maryland to the Elite 8 if not further.

The loss by Duke probably costs them a #1 seed unless they can win the ACC Tourney next week. Right now you have to pencil in Syracuse, Kentucky, and Kansas as sure fire #1 seeds. Personally I think Kansas and Kentucky are heads and shoulders better than anybody else in the country when they are playing up to their capabilities. As a Maryland fan I would love to see the Terps challenge for another Final Four but as a realist there is no denying they would probably get crushed by KU and UK.

BASEBALL FREE AGENTS PSA

12 Angry Mascots has this stirring and very emotionally charged PSA on neglected baseball free agents still looking for a paycheck near you. With spring training underway (Orioles Josh Bell and Nick Markakis have both hit bombs today...hell yeah!) we can often forget about the older players whom are no longer wanted or neglected by GMs all over this great nation. It's up to you and I to make sure these players can survive without making millions of dollars for the first time in years, sometimes decades, to play a game we love so much. I beg of you to think of all the Nomars out there who can no longer do steroids freely without prejudice and now must live a life full of joints, tendons, and hamstrings crumbling as their baseball skills deteriorate with age. It's a shame. Give today.

TAYLOR MAYS IS VERY FAST...BUT HE STILL SUCKS

USC Safety Taylor Mays ran an official 4.43 forty today at the NFL combine which as you may know is extremely fast. In fact it's the 10th fastest time this year at the NFL combine and it's only a tenth of a second behind Golden Tate. And yet some cheesedick GM will draft Mays ahead of Golden in the first round come April despite the fact that Tate has completely owned him. Well at least we know Mays will be taking a pay cut in the NFL now that his USC days are over. Poor kid.

BRAZIL BANS PARIS HILTON BEER COMMERCIAL

According to the Associated Press this Devassa Beer commercial has been pulled from Brazil...

A sultry beer ad featuring the socialite has been pulled after consumer complaints and a watchdog agency's investigation.
An ad watchdog group, Conar, asked last week that the ad be removed, noting that regulations don't permit a beer commercial to treat women as overtly sensual objects. Brazil's Secretariat for Women's Affairs also said it had received complaints about the ad.

Holy shit! I thought America was a bunch of bitches when it came to risque advertisements getting banned but we can't even compete with Brazil in terms of all out vaginitis. Correct me if I'm wrong but this Paris Hilton commercial seems pretty tame right? I mean it's not like we can see her roast beef hanging out or anything. It's got to be something else. Maybe the Brazilians who are known for their curvy women just hate Paris because she is a disgusting whore tooth pick with blonde hair. Because if this is too sensual for Brazil then I don't ever want to visit their shithole destination filled with tropical beaches full of Reef Girls frolicking around looking for American dick to latch on. No sir. You lost a customer today Brazil.

CANADA HOCKEY WINS GOLD

Great game yesterday as Team Canada survived in OT to beat Team USA 3-2 in what was the pinnacle of a great Winter Olympics. Sure Canada won the last gold medal but overall we had the most medals with 37...a whooping 11 more than America's Hat. It feels good to beat down them down in their own country. I'm about 100% positive Obama made an executive decision to let Canada win in their most cherished sport in hockey. It's all those people got up there besides igloos, polar bears, Celine Dion, and socialized health care.

JASON KIDD MAKES MIKE WOODSON LOOK LIKE THE IDIOT WE ALL KNOW HE CAN BE

If you want to talk about how to play smart basketball then go no further than this Jason "Smack my bitch up" Kidd highlight from Friday night. Kidd not only had a remarkable triple-double with 19 points, 16 boards and 17 assists against the Hawks but he also made a heads up play late in the fourth quarter by taking advantage of the Atlanta Hawks main weakness: head coach Mike Woodson. Woodson must have thought he was Pete Carroll roaming the sidelines with the amount of slack the refs were giving him in terms of calls and on-field interference. Instead of ignoring Woodson's dumbass Kidd merely stuck out an arm while running into Woodson while he was out on the court. As you may know the coaches aren't allowed to be on the court while the game is being played thus Woodson drew the technical foul. In the fourth period. Cost them a point and possession late. Brilliant.

The Mavs eventually won in overtime 111-103 and proved to the rest of the world that Woodson may be the one person who can beat the Hawks come playoff time. Woodson of course looked like a complete jackass by arguing the call and yelling at Kidd. Players need to do this more often. Last year I couldn't help but notice how often Pete Carroll was literally 5-15 yards on the field during plays while yelling at the players and refs. My hope was Charlie Weis would notice this and call a play in his direction in order to take him out. Never happened but then again we know why Charlie didn't last past year 5 in his head coaching experience. I would have loved to see Pete The Cheat taken out by Golden on an out pattern.

ADAM BAZOOKA JONES SHIRT

Adam Jones is one of the upcoming young superstars in the game and deserves his own shirt. Coming off his first Gold Glove and All-Star appearance, the speedy Jones is known for blowing bubbles with his gum while snagging a fly or hitting a bomb into the bleachers. This is how he got his nickname of Bazooka Jones. Now you can wear the one and only Bazooka Jones 10 shirt for the low price of $17 from SportsCrack Tees.

CHUCK LIDDELL WORKS OUT IN THE NUDE

I agree it seems extremely gay to post a video here of MMA fighter Chuck Liddell butt naked working out but what saves this video is his girlfriend Heidi Northcott doing the same exact thing. So yeah, it's not all too bad to stare at right fellas?

Man card is safe for now.

Video HT: The Big Lead

MIKE MILBURY CALLS THE RUSSIANS "EUROTRASH"

NBC Announcer Mike Milbury better hope the Russian Mafia is heavily medicated with GLeeMONEX or they are going to have a personal vendetta against the a-hole. My jaw literally dropped when I heard this live yesterday. Did he really call the Russians "Eurotrash" as I shook my head? I thought I must have heard wrong but then to see Jeremy Roenick's broken jaw drop too and Mike Patrick ask him if he really said Eurotrash...I mean wow. I guess in America it's ok to show a luger die and call Russians Eurotrash but if you show one pierced nipple the whole country explodes.

Oh, and by the way the Americans better get their shit together. The Germans are gaining fast. Stop your crying Mancuso and your excuses Vonn. Buck up and win some more medals.

Video HT: Deadspin

MICHIGAN AND USC IN DEEP SHIT WITH NCAA?

If you have been following college football lately you know the NCAA is investigating both USC and Michigan for breaking the rules that every other major program tends to break....except for the shitty ones. Both of their fates belong in the NCAA hands now as we will learn within the next 2-3 months whether or not Michigan will get punished for making their players stop acting like pussies and practice or if USC will get slapped with a white glove across Tommy Trojan face for paying their "student-athletes" to lose to Stanford once again. I get this gut feeling nothing is going to come of it. I would love to see the NCAA come down and lay down the SMU on USC because those cocksuckers have been breaking compliance rules more often AD Mike Garrett cleaning up yet another dead hooker in Pete Carroll's office but they won't. USC is their golden ticket out west and Michigan honestly shouldn't be punished because I want to see DickRod in Ann Arbor as long as possible. I love seeing the Michigan faithful squirm in disgust as soon as Fraud-riguez appears on the tube.

This is how I see a potential meeting going down between the NCAA and SCUM...

ADMIRAL ACKBAR FOR OLE MISS MASCOT?

According to the AJC.com Ole Miss students are jumping on a Star Wars character as their next mascot....

The campaign for Admiral Ackbar is gaining Internet, if not intergalactic, steam.

Tuesday, Ole Miss students voted to find a new mascot to replace the abandoned Colonel Reb. A student committee to develop and propose a new mascot will be formed soon.

Ackbar, a member of the Mon Calamari species who led the Rebel Alliance ships into the Battle of Endor, appears to be the early favorite. He has more than 14,000 Facebook fans. Websites like notatrap.org -- "It's a trap!" was his famous line -- are promoting Ackbar's candidacy.

"Who wants a Colonel when you could have an Admiral?" the Web site asks, before launching into "The Story of Ole Miss Ackbar."

"A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away ... Admiral Ackbar received a deep space transmission of SEC coverage. He found that he couldn't stop watching everything from football to volleyball. One team stood out to him, the Ole Miss Rebels. He led the Galactic Rebellion, and he knew he needed to be with the Ole Miss Rebels. And so, he started the long trek to Oxford, Miss."

Personally I don't think Admiral Ackbar would be a good representation of Ole Miss. First off his skin isn't white pigmented and his racism meter would seriously fail since his tends to point towards intergalactic peace. He does look similar in appearance to former coach Ed Orgeron but I think they should just bring back Colonel Reb...

How many mascots besides UGA would get as much ass as Colonel Reb would if he came back to life? Yeah I know it's not PC to have some old racist bastard as your mascot but you don't see Notre Dame dropping the Fighting Irish because they hate the English.

SCOTT VAN PELT GETS PRANKED BY THE HOWARD STERN SHOW

It actually amazes me that Captain Janks from the Howard Stern Show could pull this shit on live air. Not only was he able to convince the ESPN producers he was recently released Eagles runningback Brian Westbrook but he got them to batch him in live on SportsCenter. Great job Captain Janks! The look on Van Pelt's face is gold. Just wondering out loud but does anybody actually watch SportsCenter anymore? With the internet and all the streaming videos of highlights plus all the blogs devoted to one's favorite teams it would seem that SportsCenter would be facing extinction. I guess it's a good thing they still have Tiger Woods to cover.