Tupac Killed It At Coachella

Dude I would have gone ape shit if I saw this in person. I was a big 2pac fan back in the day. "I ain't a killer but don't push me...revenge is like the sweetest joy next to getting p*ssy...pictures paragraphs are loaded...wide words being quoted" was heard on a loop in my old ride the '87 Nissan 200SX back in the mid to late 90's. This isn't real, it's a holographic 2Pac, but they need to seriously start doing this shit for dead artists. I'm not even joking. I would love to go see a dead Jim Morrison perform "Alabama Song" or Biggie belt out some "Big Poppa." While we are at it why don't we bring back a holographic Rocket Ismail so I can pretend the last 20 years of Notre Dame football never happened. Or maybe a young Cal Ripken before he got all fat and bald? I'm sure the Japanese are on top of it.

By the way the best days of rap were back in the 90's. You had NWA, Dre, Snoop, Ice Cube, Eazy E, Biggie, Too Short, Tupac, etc. just killing it. Today's rap is just fucking horrible. I know I sound like some old asshole who thinks his generation is better but mine really was. I feel bad for college and high school kids these days. Not only do they got to listen to shitty rap but when they are done with school they won't be able to find a decent job and will be saddled with an enormous amount of college debt. See the key to life is to drop out of school, have a few kids, get government assistance and bitch about rich people while you vote for Obama. It's as American as apple pie.

Now excuse me while I pop my hip back in place.

Via WWTDD

Probably Not A Great Idea To "Streak" At A Rugby Match

Rugby player Olly Barkley with the picture perfect form tackle. I've never heard of Olly before this drunk got taken down on the pitch but if I was going to pick a rugby name I think Olly Barkley might be the best suited for one. It's sounds like a superhero name. It would either be Olly Barkley or Steel McNuts.

Via HotClicks

Hockey Isn't Violent At All

I swear watching the NHL Playoffs is like watching a tennis match or even a ballet. Such grace and definitely a gentlemen's game.

Rob Gronkowski Says He Would F*#K Tim Tebow So He Can Take His Virginity

Just another day of Gronk being Gronk. I wonder how Tim Tebow will respond?

Video via @Cartmaniak

Friday the 13th Strikes Notre Dame, DE Aaron Lynch Transferring

Last season Aaron Lynch, all 6'6 260 lbs of him, came in as a true freshman at Notre Dame and provided the Fighting Irish with a pass rush they hadn't seen in years. Lynch finished up his frosh season with 5.5 sacks and named freshman first team All-American. This year he was expected to start again on a defensive line that was expected to dominate along with Stephon Tuitt and Louis Nix. Today Friday the 13th hit South Bend as Lynch who took a leave of absence last week after getting in a fight with offensive tackle Tate Nichols and a verbal fight with the coaching staff decided not to show up for practice and has decided to transfer.

Brian Kelly addressed the media this morning about Lynch quitting the team. Video courtesy of IrishIllustrated.com


First off this can not be understated. This is a tremendous loss for the Notre Dame football program. You just don't replace a "next man in" guy for Lynch. The same could be said for Michael Floyd and it's one of the reasons why Notre Dame fought so hard to keep him through four years. Lynch is a beast and will be a top 15 NFL pick in the 2014 draft when he leaves after his junior season. No one at Notre Dame who knew Lynch believed he would stay all 4 years because his eyes have been set on the NFL from the get go.

IrishIllustrated.com's Pete Sampson has been on top of the story from the start and had this to say about the Lynch saga.

For starters, I'm not surprised. I referenced this in the podcast yesterday, but the coaching staff was at the end of their rope with Aaron Lynch and the maintenance that had been required to keep him as part of the program. Even after he returned to the program this week, there was never a sense that he was fully invested in Notre Dame or happy to be here.

In the past three semesters I've had a player call Lynch "un-coachable" another player talk about his "attitude problem" and a third try to talk sense into him that he just needed to make it through the first semester of his junior year before leaving, to which Lynch replied that that was too long to wait.

It's my belief Brian Kelly was pushed to the limit with Lynch in terms of accommodation. There's only so much you can do to convince a kid to stick with the program before it starts to undermine your authority with the remainder of the team. I believe Kelly probably hit that point in the last week. While that's not an assertion Notre Dame is better off without Lynch on the team athletically, it's an acknowledgement that the locker room should be improved in its chemistry without him.

From what I'm hearing, it sounds like South Florida is the early leader for land Lynch. I've been told that Lynch already tried to reach out to Florida State. And Florida State hung up.

Now let me tell you what I believe happened in the Lynch drama. The main reason why Lynch was so frustrated with being at Notre Dame was because of his fiance. While Lynch is only 19 and his fiance is still a senior in high school down in Florida he has been adamant about his love for her and the separation was making him depressed. His grades were not an issue and as a starter his playing time had nothing to do with it. It was the mere fact that he was and still is "pussy whipped" and misses his girl. I'm not going to judge because I myself was the same way my first two years of college because like most kids I was a fucking idiot. Lynch couldn't see the big picture (Notre Dame degree to fall back on, plenty of fishes in the sea up at ND and St. Mary's, future millions guaranteed after he leaves his junior season if he stays healthy) and despite his Mom making her best efforts to keep him up there because she could see the big picture herself Aaron had had enough. And apparently the coaches including Brian Kelly couldn't deal with the headache anymore.

At some point all kids have to grow up. Hopefully Lynch will eventually do that. Unfortunately for a program like Notre Dame who hasn't had the type of talent that Lynch brings to the table on Saturdays they will not get to see him mature. But no one person is bigger than the program and team itself.

Lynch quit. Notre Dame will move on and it should. Look for senior Kapron Lewis-Moore to "replace" Lynch at his defensive end spot.

Steve Spurrier Just Cock Slapped UGA and Mark Richt

South Carolina head ball coach Steve Spurrier was a willy one today in front of reporters. He was asked about the upcoming season and what were his thoughts coming off South Carolina's most successful season...ever.

“Now, our people know we can win 11 games, and when we don’t, they’re going to be, ‘How come we’re not winning 11, Coach?’” Spurrier said in his familiar twang and wearing that equally familiar smirk. “That’s just the way it is.”

Spurrier than was asked his thoughts on Georgia and Mark Richt wanting to move their annual SEC East clash to later in the season. This should piss off Bulldawg Nation:

“I don’t know. I sort of always liked playing them that second game because you could always count on them having two or three key players suspended.”

It will be interesting to hear how "Christian" value man Richt responds to the Old Ball Coach critique of his program. I'm sure he will mutter the same old bull shit about college kids make mistakes and blah blah blah. It's weird how doesn't happen every single season at other programs but whatever, Richt is Christian so it's all good.

He also had more choice words for Nick Saban, Les Miles, and Will Muschamp. Check out ESPN.com's Chris Low article here.

Top Basketball Recruits Nerlens Noel and Shabazz Muhammad Announce College Decisions

Two basketball powerhouses picked up the two best recruits in the nation yesterday. First up was Nerlens Noel who is the #2 overall recruit in the nation and at 6'10 can step in and dominate the college game much like Anthony Davis did this past season for #1 Kentucky. And like Davis Noel will be another one and done player for Kentucky as he decided to take his services to Lexington to ball for head coach John Calipari who once again gets the top class in the nation. Nerlens which sounds like drunk southern slang for New Orleans picked Kentucky on ESPNU with a little help from some clippers at the barber shop.

Not too shabby for coach Calipari. You go from "The Unibrow" dominating the paint to "House Party" in 2012.

Second to pick on ESPNU was Shabazz Muhammad, a point guard out of Las Vegas, who is the #1 rated overall prospect in the country. Like Nerlens parents Shabazz apparently were high as a kite when they decided to pick out his name. Shabazz was down to Kentucky, Duke, and UCLA. He decided to stay out West...

UCLA head coach Ben Howland has to be ecstatic getting Shabazz along with Kyle Anderson, the #3 overall prospect in the country. Next up for UCLA is the big guy in the middle in Georgia's Tony Parker. Howland has been on the hot seat but with these two one and done players he can take UCLA back to the Final Four and perhaps compete with Kentucky for a National Title. I think we all know why Shabazz picked UCLA over Kentucky and Duke. It's not because of the competition or the coaching or even the history. It's the Asian chicks. Think about it. UCLA stands for U C Lots of Asian chicks all around campus.

Now that is something to cheer for.

Stanley Cup Playoffs Started Last Night

Unfortunately I've missed the whole NHL season since I put a one year protest on the game because they did nothing to prevent my Atlanta Thrashers from moving to Winnipeg of all places so forgive me for my lack of insight. It's not right because the passion and electricity that is the Stanley Cup Playoffs is above and beyond any of the other professional sports playoffs in my opinion. To get you hyped up the NHL produced a couple of videos for the conferences. Enjoy.

Eastern Conference Preview


Western Conference Preview


Oh yeah and fuck you Atlanta Spirit for killing hockey! Assholes. I won't even go to the Hawks games because they have their slimy mitts all over the franchise.

Jeff Francoeur Is A Good Guy, Buys 20 Pizzas For Fans In Oakland Stands

Many baseball fans will remember Jeff Francoeur as the can't miss Atlanta Braves prospect who was dubbed "The Natural" when he exploded onto the MLB scene 6 years ago. Today he is the did miss prospect who now occupies right field for the Kansas City Royals after playing with the Mets and Rangers since he was traded from his hometown Atlanta. But what people should remember about Frenchy is what he did yesterday to a whole section of fans in Oakland...

It all began last September when Francoeur engaged with a bunch of Oakland diehards seated out in right field on a night when it happened to be “Bacon Tuesday.” The following evening he strolled to his spot in right and threw a ball in their direction with a hundred dollar bill wrapped around it along with a note that read, “Beer or Bacon Dog on me. Jeff Francoeur.” And it’s been authentic love ever since.

He did it again last night — 20 pizzas to Section 149 (here’s video). Jeff Francoeur is awesome.

Those same well-fed fans presented him with a green shirt that said “Second Annual Bacon Fest sponsored by Jeff Francoeur.” Here’s the keeper quote from Frenchy: “I told them I’ll come out early and hang out with them in the parking lot and eat bacon.”

Yes indeed. Frenchy is pretty fucking awesome. The guy who replaced him in Atlanta, Jason Heyward, was asked what he would do if fans made a shirt of himself to honor him and he responded with "SUE THE MOTHERFUCKER!"*

*=Heyward didn't actually say this and please don't sue us...again.

Frenchy by the way got a shirt at the Second Annual Bacon Tuesday and asked for every member of the section to autograph for him. Seriously. Don't believe me then look for yourself.

Bobby Petrino's 8bit Motorbike Adventure Video Game

Via EDSBS

Buy the Petrino shirt below....

Orioles Baseball Has Aged Robert Andino Apparently

And made him more grumpy. Don't get me wrong I like the Orioles but this is how I feel when I watch them the past...shit basically my whole life. Poor Robert Andino. He's lost the joy of baseball. By the way the "new" Orioles uniforms are the tits. They are basically identical to their 70's/80's uniforms with some minor tweaking of the cartoon bird.

Via Reddit

NMA.TV Explains the Bobby Petrino Saga

I could watch these Taiwan animations all day. In fact I think we need to start doing these for our news. They nailed the Petrino story with Jennifer Dorrell falling off the bike and the cash payment of $20k she received to be quiet. Hilarious.

SB Nation's Dan and Matt Tackle The Ultimate Sports Guy Question: Bro vs Douche Bag

Great job of analysis in the century old question of which sports figures are bros and which are douche bags? I couldn't agree more with what they said but I think we need to look at some more just for the hell of it.

Dustin Pedroia: Douche bag. On a team filled with plenty of douche bags he might be the smallest in stature but clearly the biggest in ego with Papelbum pitching in Philly now.

Justin Verlander: He won the MVP and Cy Young last year but more importantly he appears in a commercial with Kate Upton currently which means he probably fucked her so he definitely has ultimate BRO status.

Lebron James: Lebron is the rich kid that wants everyone to love him but everybody fucking hates him including his teammates so he is most certainly a DOUCHE BAG.

Urban Meyer: Not as easy to pick this one as you might expect. Sure Urban lies to recruits and he also left Florida in shambles but he won more National Titles in half the time as the Ole Ball Coach so I would say that is pretty BRO -like. With that being said if he isn't currently coaching your team then we can all agree he is a douche bag.

Feel free to add your comments below on this life or death question. And be sure to check out SB Nation's Dan Rubenstein and Matt Ufford if you are a BRO. If your a DOUCHE BAG go check them out too.

Not Your Grandfather's Naval Academy, Navy Football Players Break Out In Dance for New Stretch Routine

The Naval Academy is not for the faint of heart when it comes to the physical, academic, and schedule demands it puts on it's Midshipmen to perform every day. Luckily for the football team head coach Ken Niumatalolo has a new stretch routine that breaks up the monotony that is every day life in Annapolis, MD. With just under 5 months left to prepare for a trip to Ireland to play Notre Dame in their season opener this Navy team proved it's not your grandfather's Navy. They get down. Ladies be afraid. Very afraid.

Video via HotClicks

Michigan Is Now Using Twitter Hashtags on their Football Field

Michigan Football on WhoSay

If this happened at Notre Dame the collective pop you just heard would be the brains of thousands of alumni's heads bursting in rage at the sight of a twitter hashtag spoiling the godly soil of the football stadium. The hashtag is suppose to be used solely for the Spring Game. When Denard Robinson got word their would be hash on the field he immediately went out and tried to smoke it. Idiot. Everyone knows the Michigan grass is artificial.

LSUFreek on the Bobby Petrino Crash

The story that just keeps on giving. I promise I'll eventually stop talking about Bobby Petrino but I can't not post this great LSUFreek gif. With Petrino now gone I've been hearing some whore mongering rumors on the interweb that there was no motorcycle accident. Jessica Dorrell's fiance found out about the affair and beat the shit out of Petrino seems plausible. I mean how does Dorrell not have a scratch on her if she was in the accident with Petrino? Petrino suffered broken ribs so those had to be kicks in the gut while on the ground crying for mercy right?

BTW I love the Bill Clinton thumbs up. It just tops it all off for me. Complete epic gif from LSUFreek.

Bobby Petrino Fired According to Joe Schad

According to ESPN's Joe Schad Arkansas has decided to part ways with football head coach Bobby Petrino. Who would have thought the whole "if you nailed a girl half your age in your office who was engaged to someone you work with you yourself a currently married man with kids and then crashed your hog with your mistress with you while giving you reach arounds and then lie to your superiors about the whole thing" would get you fired? I just didn't see this coming at all. Sometimes the heart wants what the heart wants and now Petrino can enjoy his time off from his job, his family, shit basically his whole life.

Before you even ask the leading candidate and pretty much the only candidate I can think of to replace Petrino will be Arkansas State head coach Gus Malzahn, a former Razorback player and offensive coordinator. Malzahn is familiar with the conference, the state, and can recruit with the best of them. This might turn into an Ohio State situation where the school actually upgrades at the head coaching position despite a scandal. You gotta love college football!

The Ballad of Bobby Petrino Song

Via The Chris Vernon Show comes the ballad that is bound to become the state song of Arkansas. Alabama may have "Sweet Home Alabama" but they sure as shit don't have "The Ballad of Bobby Petrino."


Now go ahead and get the Bobby Petrino shirt you've been dying for...

Protesters Pushing Against Marlins Front Door Demanding Ozzie Guillen's Dismissal

The Miami Herald has this picture of hundreds of protesters freaking out because an idiot baseball manager said he likes Fidel Castro. This is actually great news for the Marlins organization. They now have more fans showing up to protest than people who buy tickets. As they say in business there is no such thing as bad publicity and the Marlins and Ozzie Guillen are getting a ton of it right now.

I still think they are there to protest that monstrosity in the outfield and not Guillen's words of support for ole Fidel. But hey maybe that's just me. Here are Guillen's exact words about Castro:

“He’s a bull—- dictator and everybody’s against him, and he still survives, has power. Still has a country behind him,’’ Ozzie replied. “Everywhere he goes, they roll out the red carpet. I don’t admire his philosophy; I admire him.’’

What do you think about Guillen's 5 game suspension? Too harsh or about right? Another shitstorm caused by the media distorting the words and facts?

Some Signs from the Pro-Bobby Petrino Rally

It's all about forgiving, forgetting, and of course winning in Arkansas. Woo Pig Sooie!!!!

Show your support for a non licensed t-shirt seller by buying this shirt.


Oh yeah here is a not weird at all video of the Save Coach Petrino Rally via ShirtsWithRandomTriangles