I agree it seems extremely gay to post a video here of MMA fighter Chuck Liddell butt naked working out but what saves this video is his girlfriend Heidi Northcott doing the same exact thing. So yeah, it's not all too bad to stare at right fellas?
Man card is safe for now.
Video HT: The Big Lead
NBC Announcer Mike Milbury better hope the Russian Mafia is heavily medicated with GLeeMONEX or they are going to have a personal vendetta against the a-hole. My jaw literally dropped when I heard this live yesterday. Did he really call the Russians "Eurotrash" as I shook my head? I thought I must have heard wrong but then to see Jeremy Roenick's broken jaw drop too and Mike Patrick ask him if he really said Eurotrash...I mean wow. I guess in America it's ok to show a luger die and call Russians Eurotrash but if you show one pierced nipple the whole country explodes.
Oh, and by the way the Americans better get their shit together. The Germans are gaining fast. Stop your crying Mancuso and your excuses Vonn. Buck up and win some more medals.
Video HT: Deadspin
If you have been following college football lately you know the NCAA is investigating both USC and Michigan for breaking the rules that every other major program tends to break....except for the shitty ones. Both of their fates belong in the NCAA hands now as we will learn within the next 2-3 months whether or not Michigan will get punished for making their players stop acting like pussies and practice or if USC will get slapped with a white glove across Tommy Trojan face for paying their "student-athletes" to lose to Stanford once again. I get this gut feeling nothing is going to come of it. I would love to see the NCAA come down and lay down the SMU on USC because those cocksuckers have been breaking compliance rules more often AD Mike Garrett cleaning up yet another dead hooker in Pete Carroll's office but they won't. USC is their golden ticket out west and Michigan honestly shouldn't be punished because I want to see DickRod in Ann Arbor as long as possible. I love seeing the Michigan faithful squirm in disgust as soon as Fraud-riguez appears on the tube.
This is how I see a potential meeting going down between the NCAA and SCUM...
According to the AJC.com Ole Miss students are jumping on a Star Wars character as their next mascot....
The campaign for Admiral Ackbar is gaining Internet, if not intergalactic, steam.
Tuesday, Ole Miss students voted to find a new mascot to replace the abandoned Colonel Reb. A student committee to develop and propose a new mascot will be formed soon.
Ackbar, a member of the Mon Calamari species who led the Rebel Alliance ships into the Battle of Endor, appears to be the early favorite. He has more than 14,000 Facebook fans. Websites like notatrap.org -- "It's a trap!" was his famous line -- are promoting Ackbar's candidacy.
"Who wants a Colonel when you could have an Admiral?" the Web site asks, before launching into "The Story of Ole Miss Ackbar."
"A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away ... Admiral Ackbar received a deep space transmission of SEC coverage. He found that he couldn't stop watching everything from football to volleyball. One team stood out to him, the Ole Miss Rebels. He led the Galactic Rebellion, and he knew he needed to be with the Ole Miss Rebels. And so, he started the long trek to Oxford, Miss."
It actually amazes me that Captain Janks from the Howard Stern Show could pull this shit on live air. Not only was he able to convince the ESPN producers he was recently released Eagles runningback Brian Westbrook but he got them to batch him in live on SportsCenter. Great job Captain Janks! The look on Van Pelt's face is gold. Just wondering out loud but does anybody actually watch SportsCenter anymore? With the internet and all the streaming videos of highlights plus all the blogs devoted to one's favorite teams it would seem that SportsCenter would be facing extinction. I guess it's a good thing they still have Tiger Woods to cover.
USA skier Julia Mancuso finished 2nd to a German this time and not Lindsay Vonn in the super-combined but the only reason why I ackowledge her silver medal is it gives me a reason to post pictures of the little Vixen. Here you go SportsCrack heads...
Lingerie shot...
Mancuso getting felt up in the hot tub...
She also likes to belly up to the bar with an ice cold Carlsberg...
Mancuso only turns her back to the smelly French...
She can kiss our Silver medals any day of the week...
She clearly loves to party and bring home the medals for the US of A. Give her a helping hand America...
And here is an interview she did with Digg in Whistler...
If you watched the Olympics yesterday you might have noticed all of the gnarly crashes by the women in the downhill skiing events. Nobody was seriously injured except the ego of this French fry...
Video HT: WWTDD
Yesterday was a great day in USA Winter Olympic history. Lindsay Vonn won the gold despite her injury while Shaun White and Shani Davis brought home the gold while dominating their respective sports. So far I have been glued to my recliner watching the Olympics nonstop...one of the main reasons why the blog posts have been scarce lately. They only come around once every 4 years fucktards so you might as well watch them and enjoy it. Right? Exactly.
USA! USA! USA!
I told you it wouldn't fit Lindsay!
I could literally watch this all day. Just seeing her chubby face stare at the wall like it's a 600 pound donut coming to eat her is simply priceless. They need to start doing this show for sports figures. First one up can be Lane Kiffin. The NCAA sends a wall in the shape of a snake. Make a network out of it.
We can't have an initial report of pitchers and catchers reporting to Spring Training today with the absence of the George Brett shitting on himself video. It's as American as apple pies. Across camps in sunny Arizona and Florida the spectacle of mostly out of shape baseball players will stretch, shoot the shit, and warm up their bodies to get ready for Opening Day which is about 6 weeks from now.
Braves fans received some good news today when a MRI on Jair Jurrjens pitching shoulder revealed no structural damage and just minor inflammation. Braves Nation including myself were lighting the torches for GM Frank Wren for trading away Javier Vasquez to the Yankees for Tony Tarasco 2.0 because of the supposed surplus in quality starting pitchers the Braves had. You dodged this bullet Wren.
Orioles fans should be ready for an interesting season in which the once proud franchise will look to snap a 12 season losing record streak. The additions of Kevin Millwood and Mike Gonzalez should solidify a very young and talented pitching core while the signings of Miguel Tejada and Garrett Atkins could provide some more explosive offensive weapons to an offense that boosts All Stars Brian Roberts, Nick Markakis, Adam Jones and up and coming talents such as Matt Wieters and Nolan Reimold. In the toughest division when you face the Yankees, Red Sox and Rays (all top 5 teams overall in the Majors) 19 games each a winning record would be a major accomplishment considering the Orioles are still extremely young in starting pitchers. Brian Matusz, Brad Bergesen, and Chris Tillman all flashed looks of future greatness last year as rookies but will have bumps in the road much like the Atlanta Braves did in the late 80's with Tom Glavine, John Smoltz, and Steve Avery coming up.
Either way it's a time to get excited about baseball. The winter is almost gone and spring will blossom soon. And Hall of Famer George Brett will be taking a dump in his pants near you.
Play Ball!
The above picture is of a Florida Marlins Mermaid. This picture alone should make all those Cuban refuges down there want to go and see a game.
I always thought Canadians were a little off with their beady little eyes and their hockey sticks so it should come as no surprise with their preferred choice of facial cream: "Chicken shit!" Gotta love the honesty from Barry Melrose. I wonder if he uses Canadian geese shit for his hair? One can only hope. By the way the USA hockey team is up 1-0 on Switzerland after the first period. We are coming for you Canada! Your socialized health care stands no chance against our corrupt Insurance companies....EH!!
Winter Olympics AD courtesy of MacGsWorld
As you may know the Winter Olympics have officially started up in the great province of British Columbia and just taking a quick look around the sports blogosphere it sounds like most bloggers hate it. While it may be true these Winter Olympics don't involve their precious football, basketball, baseball, or soccer it would be wise to get your head out of your ass and watch it before shitting all over it.
Personally I love the Winter Olympics because we get to see athletes not named Lebron or Tiger grab all the headlines. If you can't enjoy watching the freestyle moguls where skiiers go speeding down a hilly slope that would shred Tiger Wood's labia into quarters then you are a fucking communist and you should be deported to Cuba quicker than you can say Fidel Castro. No but seriously the Winter Olympics are fun to watch. These athletes with the lone exception of curlers who are really just like Nascar Drivers (they couldn't cut it in real sports so they decided normal everyday activities like sweeping and driving a car was something which only a small portion of the population otherwise known as rednecks and ratards would appreciate) spend 4 years if not more in their lives preparing for one moment of glory. Some fail. Some triumph. Either way the competition drives them to unbelievable heights and with country pride at stake I don't see how you could not enjoy watching the Olympics.
Even sports that some may call stupid like figure skating are completely mesmerizing to watch. You try skating on a thin piece of ice in a leotard while be thrown up into the air in order to land a triple lutz-triple loop. It isn't that easy stud. I can't imagine the hours of training and dedication that went into it so I merely watch and root for the Americans to kick some ass. Oh yeah, there is also nothing wrong with being patriotic during the Olympics. It's one of the few times you can shout "USA USA USA" into someone's face without fear of being persecuted for being a douche.
So if you are bored of watching meaningless NBA games and waiting for March Madness to kick in please tune in to NBC and watch some Winter Olympics. Don't be a communist prick or a terrorist. Be American. Watch the Olympics. On NBC.
/blogpost sponsored by NBC.
For a limited time only you can warm yourself up with a DRINK LIKE A CHAMPION TODAY hoodie for only $15. We only have a limited amount of them left so go ahead and buy one today before they are gone at this great price (regular price is $35).
Umm, I really don't have much to say. I always knew Saints fans had a screw loose. Must be all the bourbon down there and swamp land. If you ever thought the movie "WaterBoy" was full of stereotypes and racist innuendo well then obviously you haven't been to Louisiana. Wow.
Video HT: WithLeather
Since we have had a ton of requests for not only a Who Dat? shirt but also for Mr. New Orleans himself now we have made an executive decision to produce the DREW ORLEANS WHO DAT NATION SHIRT. These fantastic soft cotton t-shirts have a vintage look and feel to them and are exclusive designs of SportsCrack LLC. These shirts are UNLICENSED and have absolutely no affiliation with the NFL or their properties. This is just another shirt to show your Who Dat? pride with this classic Drew Orleans designed tee shirt. Get your shirt now in time for Mardi Gras!!!!
SPORTSCRACK STORE
We have gotten a thousand requests to do this shirt so here you go New Orleans fanatics: WHO DAT? CHAMPS 2009 Shirt. For the low price of $17 you can display your Who Dat? pride with this exclusive tee shirt from SportsCrack. This is an UNLICENSED shirt and has absolutely no affiliation with the NFL or their properties. A portion of all t-shirt sales go to the American Cancer Society. Enjoy and be sure to spread the word.
SPORTSCRACK STORE
Forget about Madden Football, Tecmo Bowl was the shit back in the day. Whether you used Bo Jackson or Walter Payton or Jerry Rice to score you ridiculous amounts of touchdowns or had LT (the real one and not the pussy who wears light blue these days) rushing off the end you could dominate. It was also the first fun football game to play competively against your friends on Nintendo. It's right up there with NHL 93 and Mario Brothers in terms of iconic sounds and images and gameplay.
For a limited time we have a sale going on for the new Brian Kelly Winning His Way Shirts and Kelly's Heroes. For only $10 you can get them in either green or navy. Be sure to order yours now before they are gone. First come first serve on these bad boys.
As you know I'm not a Saints fan. In fact I don't like them at all. I'm an Atlanta Falcons fan and the Saints are their oldest and most storied rival (which really isn't much since most of both franchise is comprised of shit seasons) but I do enjoy watching celebration videos. One of these days I will get to be a part of it and I sure as hell won't be working the next day. More than likely I will be naked in a holding cell. Shivering. With a smile on my face. Anyways, here is a Saints celebration video...
Video HT: Deadspin
You can not have a Super Bowl without a high-five montage. So here you go, the high-five montage...
